which parent is the jerk in this instance

morethenjustmum

If you were sure that the lice situation was taken care of, then I don't understand why you even said anything about it. Of course other parents are going to freak out about lice.

I guess I honestly thought I me putting it in the past tense and saying it was gone would be enough
I guessed wrong
tight lips from here on out

eta I apologised and she said she understands where I was coming from and has accepted

mama drama concluded

VeryKatie

You're clearly Mom B since you said "we" at one point.

I got one bed bug on my coat once from a bus and found it at work (luckily I never took it home and was very careful), but people do get very freaked out about bugs like lice and bed bugs. The best thing you can do is understand both sides have good points, and they're generous enough to invite you over when a little more time has passed. My advice is for both families to get over it and stop worrying. You can control your feelings.

DamePiglet

If you were sure that the lice situation was taken care of, then I don't understand why you even said anything about it. Of course other parents are going to freak out about lice.

I guess I honestly thought I me putting it in the past tense and saying it was gone would be enough
I guessed wrong
tight lips from here on out

eta I apologised and she said she understands where I was coming from and has accepted

mama drama concluded

Glad to hear it!

Just out of curiosity...
Are all of you from the same place?
I ask because lice were a much "bigger deal" where I grew up than they are where I live now.
Many of the people that I grew up with (and their parents) might react the same way that the husband reacted.
People from here tend to be much more matter-of-fact about lice (as you expected the other people to be)
Just made me wonder if it wasn't a bit of a cultural difference.

seltzermint555

... I think what we have here is my first ever case of extreme butt hurt

So there we have it...

Right on! I like how you are owning your drama here. Lesson learned, right? You are taking this very graciously, OP! :drinker: :flowerforyou: :smooched:

Yep -- totally agree.

BinaryPulsar

Yeah, good work Op!!!

VeryKatie

I would just like to add that I asked because I genuinely feel like I handle it badly and overreacted just a smidge ;-). My husband was not very helpful cause he is lovely and supports me to a fault. I needed the opinions of people who don't know myself or my friend so I could perhaps look at the situation with different eyes.

You're being very nice about it. I hope the friendship can be salvaged.

Good luck.

And I hope whatever you said to your son won't cloud his judgement of that family forever. I'm guessing it might.

Chain_Ring

You're both pretty lame IMO.

bugaboo_sue

You're clearly Mom B since you said "we" at one point.

I got one bed bug on my coat once from a bus and found it at work (luckily I never took it home and was very careful), but people do get very freaked out about bugs like lice and bed bugs. The best thing you can do is understand both sides have good points, and they're generous enough to invite you over when a little more time has passed. My advice is for both families to get over it and stop worrying. You can control your feelings.

You should get freaked out about things like bed bugs and lice. A friend of mine's son was renting an apartment and found out that the place had bed bugs. They had to fumigate the place AND his furniture to make absolute 100% sure that they were gone.

DamePiglet

You're clearly Mom B since you said "we" at one point.

I got one bed bug on my coat once from a bus and found it at work (luckily I never took it home and was very careful), but people do get very freaked out about bugs like lice and bed bugs. The best thing you can do is understand both sides have good points, and they're generous enough to invite you over when a little more time has passed. My advice is for both families to get over it and stop worrying. You can control your feelings.

You should get freaked out about things like bed bugs and lice. A friend of mine's son was renting an apartment and found out that the place had bed bugs. They had to fumigate the place AND his furniture to make absolute 100% sure that they were gone.

What good does "freaking out" do?
RESPOND? yeah.
But no real need to freak out.

juliewatkin

i dont know a single person who has had lice, i remember inspections at school when i was young and there was always an announcement that we were lice free. considering a few people said lice are inevitable, are they really all that common in other areas?

They went like wild fire through the schools here. My kids both had them a few times. They have long hair down their backs and the amount or work required to pull the nits off hair that long is tremendous. The effectively get rid of the eggs you have to basically go a few hairs at a time with a bright light and scrape them with your fingernails. They stay in the schools when families don't spend the time to get rid of the eggs and the process is repeated.

ShannonS921

.

ShannonS921

I am slightly ashamed to admit that I am mom B

My son cries a lot , its a thing he is young, he loves those kids and his heart broke. what can I say.

I didn't tell him the party was cancelled because of him I told him
'they are a bit worried about the lice not being completely gone and think it would be a better idea if we had a visit later this summer. What would you like to do instead". I planned something fun to do at home.

My friend is great but her husband has a superiority complex the size of my *kitten*. He is often condescending to people he finds are beneath him ( read me ) and often questions my parenting,among other things this may be why I am so sensitive. I treated my kids I vacuumed ,I change the sheets every second day and I check them twice a day to be sure they haven't got anything. They picked it up from camp. It happens I know its annoying and lice sucks but I am hyper vigilante about it.

I guess when I wrote that I had treated them and checked them and everything it would be okay , that they knew me well enough to know how careful I am with this kind of thing. T hen she hands the phone to him.

In all honesty I feel like a complete *kitten* for responding the way I did , especially about my kid I should have never written that. But hubby is a hot head and kept telling me they we a-holes. Thats why I asked all of you. Also the party wasn't cancelled we were just asked not to come. I think what we have here is my first ever case of extreme butt hurt

So there we have it
I am an over sensitive jack *kitten* with a big mouth prone to passive aggressive behavior and need to call my friend and say sorry.

Oh and I mentioned it in the first place cause if their kids had had lice I would want to know, I am all about full disclosure when it come to contagious stuff.

any other questions ?

once again thank you

I think this is a very mature attitude to have, as long as you follow through.

I had lice when I was a kid....I had really long, thick hair....if someone told me today that their child had lice two or three weeks ago, I wouldn't allow my child to go to that house for a while....just in case.

Unfortunately, people are judgmental....you may have permanently caused a rift in your friendship just by being honest. I hope that this is not the case.

Tigg_er

... I think what we have here is my first ever case of extreme butt hurt

So there we have it...

Right on! I like how you are owning your drama here. Lesson learned, right? You are taking this very graciously, OP! :drinker: :flowerforyou: :smooched:

^^THIS