"You MUST send me a message if you want to be my friend"

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Replies

  • Mikkimeow
    Mikkimeow Posts: 1,282 Member
    Also, I had to add a disclaimer because I kept getting unsolicited nudes from men, a couple women. Also, one person added me just to talk about violating me. My MFP friends list is now strictly people I interact with on a consistent basis that I can trust.
  • _BearNecessities_
    _BearNecessities_ Posts: 432 Member
    OP-so you made an effort to post this message but you can't send one with a FR?

    time well spent

    ^^^ I like you.

    OP, we get it. You're all about what's in it for you and you think we should just accept whoever wants to lurk in our little world. No thanks. My list is intentionally small and I cut people regularly when I feel it's appropriate. I don't want lurkers and I don't want people who don't have similar goals and/or people who annoy me. So if you can't even bother to send a message explaining why we might get along, then I know you aren't the type of person I want on my FL.
  • jasonmh630
    jasonmh630 Posts: 2,850 Member
    Guilty. It's done because I want to know that said person has actually read my page, instead of aimlessly adding people. This helps me with avoiding people that send a request, then never say another word. You don't understand it, that's fine. It's a perfectly acceptable request, though. It takes all of 5-6 seconds. The message box is right there when you click to send a request.
  • trogalicious
    trogalicious Posts: 4,584 Member
    -Whatever-Ci-I-Do-What-I-Want-GIF.gif
    yes. this.

    I have had people add me, get pissed off that my diary isn't public, and then freak out.

    "DUDE, Y U NO SHARE WAT U EET SINCE U LOOSE ALL DAT WAIT"

    ain't no body got time for that garbage. nobody. even me.
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    I don't accept people who don't send a message. I also do not warn people of this ahead of time.

    Yeah, I don't any more either...
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    meh, its a personal preference. I personally like to know where someone found me and why they feel we might connect. I try to have interaction with all of my friends. Also, I'm totally random and tend to use this site more for the social aspect by way of word vomiting it up on my wall about personal stuff. I am aware that is not for everyone.....
  • Mikkimeow
    Mikkimeow Posts: 1,282 Member
    Bleeding nipples? *perks up*

    Go sit down. Noodz on the way.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Do you have an instagram? Do you have to know everyone that follows you there as well? You've lost 101 lbs and I'm sure you're a motivation to a lot of people that you might not even know who just stumbled upon in a thread and have never talked to. I feel like it's more creepy to say "i saw that you posted in a thread but i never talked to you" than to just not say anything at all.

    I am more creeped out by silence. It is like having a conversation at a restaurant, and some stranger wearing work out gear comes over and sits next to me, then picks through my salad, asking how many carbs are in spinach. At least tell my who the hell you are first...

    I choked on my salad reading this... :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    Could you even imagine MFP in real life? People just flashing each other, that one random guy that walks by and yells at you for not eating breakfast. A bunch of men with bleeding nipples stopping to talk about their fitbits.

    And a bunch of whiny babies on soap boxes in random corners yelling about mean people and how we should just love each other and exchange rainbows, puppies, and unicorn s***.
    OMG! I had to cover my mouth to keep from yelping out loud at work! You are unfriended for nearly getting me in trouble. lol
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    Do you have an instagram? Do you have to know everyone that follows you there as well? You've lost 101 lbs and I'm sure you're a motivation to a lot of people that you might not even know who just stumbled upon in a thread and have never talked to. I feel like it's more creepy to say "i saw that you posted in a thread but i never talked to you" than to just not say anything at all.

    leaves instagram. joins site that's not instagram. then is shocked that this site doesn't work like instagram
  • skullshank
    skullshank Posts: 4,323 Member
    Don't add me. Problem solved.

    wouldnt have worked out anyway.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    I like messages because it indicates whether or not someone will be a supportive friend. If they can't take time to say "Nice name/nice post/nice *kitten*" it's likely they won't do that on a daily basis either.
  • Shalaurise
    Shalaurise Posts: 707 Member
    you want to check out my snacks....but you can't be bothered to type a note that says, "i just want to check out your snacks?" yeah, you can go away now.

    I just want to check out your.... "snacks." ;)
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
    My favorite is the messageless FR, and when you go to creep their profile to see who the hell they are, the first thing it says in all caps is "YOU MUST INCLUDE A MESSAGE IF YOU SEND ME A FR!!!"

















    MIKKIMEOW!!!
  • _HeartsOnFire_
    _HeartsOnFire_ Posts: 5,304 Member
    Leaving a message takes all of two seconds...is it REALLY that big of a deal not to send one. I happen to be one of those people and yes I do in fact like to know how the person found me. if we have mutual friends or they feel I can help them in some way.

    This...plus I'm sorry I try to keep my list at a # I can actually interact with all of them. I am finding it hard to do with the 147 I have. Some of their stuff gets lost in the feed, so I'm looking to do a cut again soon. Though my diary should be open.
  • Mikkimeow
    Mikkimeow Posts: 1,282 Member
    My favorite is the messageless FR, and when you go to creep their profile to see who the hell they are, the first thing it says in all caps is "YOU MUST INCLUDE A MESSAGE IF YOU SEND ME A FR!!!"

















    MIKKIMEOW!!!

    hehehe I am such a little *kitten*.
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
    meh, its a personal preference. I personally like to know where someone found me and why they feel we might connect. I try to have interaction with all of my friends. Also, I'm totally random and tend to use this site more for the social aspect by way of word vomiting it up on my wall about personal stuff. I am aware that is not for everyone.....

    Dammit, I love when you say word vomit. :smooched:
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    Also, I had to add a disclaimer because I kept getting unsolicited nudes from men, a couple women. Also, one person added me just to talk about violating me. My MFP friends list is now strictly people I interact with on a consistent basis that I can trust.

    YES this too.

    If you are creepy in the forums (and all you creepers know who you are), you are getting denied.

    If you PM me with "I want to throw you up against a wall and bang the sh&t out of you," you are getting denied.

    If you have an ED and you have no intention of working on it, you are getting denied.

    Messages help me sort this out.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    Hey, it's my FL, I have the right to curate it as I see fit. My diary is open to anyone who wants to creep it, but I don't wanna have just anybody on my FL, as their posts show up in my feed, too.
  • vjohn04
    vjohn04 Posts: 2,276 Member
    I like people that complain. We should be friends.

    But, send me a msg first...
  • ActuarialChef
    ActuarialChef Posts: 1,413 Member
    I usually run a credit check, criminal background and insurability screening prior to accepting any friend requests.

    Always consult an actuary as well... just to make sure your investment of friendship is worthwhile.

    You know what an actuary is! I like you! :smile:
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    I usually run a credit check, criminal background and insurability screening prior to accepting any friend requests.

    Always consult an actuary as well... just to make sure your investment of friendship is worthwhile.

    You know what an actuary is! I like you! :smile:
    My friend is married to an actuary.
  • PrizePopple
    PrizePopple Posts: 3,133 Member
    I actually just got one with nothing written, can't see if we have mutual friends, and I don't recognize the username as someone I've likely insulted here in the forums... not accepting.

    If I can see that we have friends in common, or I recognize the person from recent forum interactions then whatever I'm not going to be like "come back when you can make some smartass remark in a little box".
  • spade117
    spade117 Posts: 2,466 Member

    If you PM me with "I want to throw you up against a wall and bang the sh&t out of you," you are getting denied.

    That would pry be acceptable criteria for quite a few here.
  • GothyFaery
    GothyFaery Posts: 762 Member
    While I don't have that on my profile, I get it. A few weeks ago I had posted a question about exercises to do to build my chest back up after having breast implants. I got a few FR from people (all men) who didn't even reply to the thread. I'm not looking for those kinds of friends nor is it normal for me to get more than one FR in a month. I've seen people get flirty or even talk about very intimate things on the forums and I can only imagine the creepers who send FR just because of that. So I get it. I'm surprised no one has a "I don't accept FR from creepers only interested in one thing" on their page.
  • Unknown
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  • Cameron_1969
    Cameron_1969 Posts: 2,855 Member
    If I get a FR I would like to know what I did to get your attention. It's because I'm vain!. .If you thought something I said on a forum or a newsfeed was funny. . then tell me. . It's good for my ego. .. .
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    Also, I had to add a disclaimer because I kept getting unsolicited nudes from men, a couple women. Also, one person added me just to talk about violating me. My MFP friends list is now strictly people I interact with on a consistent basis that I can trust.

    YES this too.

    If you are creepy in the forums (and all you creepers know who you are), you are getting denied.

    If you PM me with "I want to throw you up against a wall and bang the sh&t out of you," you are getting denied.

    If you have an ED and you have no intention of working on it, you are getting denied.

    Messages help me sort this out.

    The creepers don't actually know they are creepers! Every time I call one out they act as if they have no clue what I'm talking about.
  • Collier78
    Collier78 Posts: 811 Member
    Do you have an instagram? Do you have to know everyone that follows you there as well? You've lost 101 lbs and I'm sure you're a motivation to a lot of people that you might not even know who just stumbled upon in a thread and have never talked to. I feel like it's more creepy to say "i saw that you posted in a thread but i never talked to you" than to just not say anything at all.

    I am more creeped out by silence. It is like having a conversation at a restaurant, and some stranger wearing work out gear comes over and sits next to me, then picks through my salad, asking how many carbs are in spinach. At least tell my who the hell you are first...

    I choked on my salad reading this... :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    Could you even imagine MFP in real life? People just flashing each other, that one random guy that walks by and yells at you for not eating breakfast. A bunch of men with bleeding nipples stopping to talk about their fitbits.

    You..:drinker: You.Are.Awesome.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    I probably average 2 FR's a month. No criteria for acceptance.
  • jasonmh630
    jasonmh630 Posts: 2,850 Member
    My favorite is the messageless FR, and when you go to creep their profile to see who the hell they are, the first thing it says in all caps is "YOU MUST INCLUDE A MESSAGE IF YOU SEND ME A FR!!!"

    This gets me too lol... I take the time to send a message with FR's, so I have the "WTF" moment when I get one from someone that didn't add a message, and they have that notice on their page too.

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