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Can men and women maintain a platonic relationship?

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Replies

  • finny11122
    finny11122 Posts: 8,436 Member
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    synchkat wrote: »
    I don't see this. I have tons of male friends through skating and there's never any other thoughts that I know of

    I dated a girl a few years ago and it was bloody hilarious . She had a squad of guy friends . Im doing relationship and life coaching for the best part of ten years and i can spot these guys a mile away. They all liked her and groveled all over her, but she loved the attention . Every chance they got they badmouthed me to her. I walked after about 5 months . Life is to short to be dealing with those losers and a girl that actually listens to them .
  • VryIrishGirl76
    VryIrishGirl76 Posts: 1,167 Member
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    In theory, yes.
    But one party will always be exercising a tad more restraint than the other.
  • synchkat
    synchkat Posts: 37,369 Member
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    finny11122 wrote: »
    synchkat wrote: »
    I don't see this. I have tons of male friends through skating and there's never any other thoughts that I know of

    I dated a girl a few years ago and it was bloody hilarious . She had a squad of guy friends . Im doing relationship and life coaching for the best part of ten years and i can spot these guys a mile away. They all liked her and groveled all over her, but she loved the attention . Every chance they got they badmouthed me to her. I walked after about 5 months . Life is to short to be dealing with those losers and a girl that actually listens to them .

    Are you saying they grovel for my attention? I'm sure I miss some signs but I grew up hanging out with my brother l, playing road hockey, skating with guys. The men I have as friends are all through skating and are happy to use me for expertise but I'd.say they are friends. They're also all 15 years older than I am at least. I just don't see why we can't all be friends why does everything have to have sexual connotations.
  • finny11122
    finny11122 Posts: 8,436 Member
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    synchkat wrote: »
    finny11122 wrote: »
    synchkat wrote: »
    I don't see this. I have tons of male friends through skating and there's never any other thoughts that I know of

    I dated a girl a few years ago and it was bloody hilarious . She had a squad of guy friends . Im doing relationship and life coaching for the best part of ten years and i can spot these guys a mile away. They all liked her and groveled all over her, but she loved the attention . Every chance they got they badmouthed me to her. I walked after about 5 months . Life is to short to be dealing with those losers and a girl that actually listens to them .

    Are you saying they grovel for my attention? I'm sure I miss some signs but I grew up hanging out with my brother l, playing road hockey, skating with guys. The men I have as friends are all through skating and are happy to use me for expertise but I'd.say they are friends. They're also all 15 years older than I am at least. I just don't see why we can't all be friends why does everything have to have sexual connotations.

    If these guys are happily married or have girlfriends , not much wrong . Its the guys that go out of their way to be friends with girls . For example -Guy friend- Hey Marie you want to grab a coffee and have a chat ? Girl - No im busy , got to go shoping . Guy Friend - I'll take you shopping , im only like 5 minutes from your house house . Girl - Ok i'll see you soon ... These type of guys will do anything to be around a girl they like , but will never actually ask the girl out on a date . Instead of pussyfooting around with some guys girlfriend or wife , they should be working on their own life and actually asking a few single girls out .
  • synchkat
    synchkat Posts: 37,369 Member
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    finny11122 wrote: »
    synchkat wrote: »
    finny11122 wrote: »
    synchkat wrote: »
    I don't see this. I have tons of male friends through skating and there's never any other thoughts that I know of

    I dated a girl a few years ago and it was bloody hilarious . She had a squad of guy friends . Im doing relationship and life coaching for the best part of ten years and i can spot these guys a mile away. They all liked her and groveled all over her, but she loved the attention . Every chance they got they badmouthed me to her. I walked after about 5 months . Life is to short to be dealing with those losers and a girl that actually listens to them .

    Are you saying they grovel for my attention? I'm sure I miss some signs but I grew up hanging out with my brother l, playing road hockey, skating with guys. The men I have as friends are all through skating and are happy to use me for expertise but I'd.say they are friends. They're also all 15 years older than I am at least. I just don't see why we can't all be friends why does everything have to have sexual connotations.

    If these guys are happily married or have girlfriends , not much wrong . Its the guys that go out of their way to be friends with girls . For example -Guy friend- Hey Marie you want to grab a coffee and have a chat ? Girl - No im busy , got to go shoping . Guy Friend - I'll take you shopping , im only like 5 minutes from your house house . Girl - Ok i'll see you soon ... These type of guys will do anything to be around a girl they like , but will never actually ask the girl out on a date . Instead of pussyfooting around with some guys girlfriend or wife , they should be working on their own life and actually asking a few single girls out .

    Ooook ya that's different. mine are all through having mutual interests. My curling buddy, skating partners. I'd go for drinks with them but that's more payment for helping. But I do consider them friends.
  • finny11122
    finny11122 Posts: 8,436 Member
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    synchkat wrote: »
    finny11122 wrote: »
    synchkat wrote: »
    finny11122 wrote: »
    synchkat wrote: »
    I don't see this. I have tons of male friends through skating and there's never any other thoughts that I know of

    I dated a girl a few years ago and it was bloody hilarious . She had a squad of guy friends . Im doing relationship and life coaching for the best part of ten years and i can spot these guys a mile away. They all liked her and groveled all over her, but she loved the attention . Every chance they got they badmouthed me to her. I walked after about 5 months . Life is to short to be dealing with those losers and a girl that actually listens to them .

    Are you saying they grovel for my attention? I'm sure I miss some signs but I grew up hanging out with my brother l, playing road hockey, skating with guys. The men I have as friends are all through skating and are happy to use me for expertise but I'd.say they are friends. They're also all 15 years older than I am at least. I just don't see why we can't all be friends why does everything have to have sexual connotations.

    If these guys are happily married or have girlfriends , not much wrong . Its the guys that go out of their way to be friends with girls . For example -Guy friend- Hey Marie you want to grab a coffee and have a chat ? Girl - No im busy , got to go shoping . Guy Friend - I'll take you shopping , im only like 5 minutes from your house house . Girl - Ok i'll see you soon ... These type of guys will do anything to be around a girl they like , but will never actually ask the girl out on a date . Instead of pussyfooting around with some guys girlfriend or wife , they should be working on their own life and actually asking a few single girls out .

    Ooook ya that's different. mine are all through having mutual interests. My curling buddy, skating partners. I'd go for drinks with them but that's more payment for helping. But I do consider them friends.

    Nothing wrong with that , unless one of them hits on you . And hopefully your responce should be - Hey dude you know im married , but im flattered you think im attractive . But i got an awesome husband and would never cheat on him . So lets get back to skating mister and stop looking at my *kitten* . :)
  • ardrasdesign
    ardrasdesign Posts: 7 Member
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    I can't. That is with single guys. I do have a few rare exceptions.
  • henshemi
    henshemi Posts: 1,981 Member
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    120% I've had lots girlfriends growing up and never slept with any of them. A lot of besties, cool girls. Sex ruins it all
  • TorontoDiane
    TorontoDiane Posts: 1,413 Member
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    yes men and women can be friends
  • liftinggoddess123
    liftinggoddess123 Posts: 469 Member
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    If he's not your ex then that works. I've never been able to stay on reasonable terms with people I've dated. I do that platonic relationships can exist just have to be honest and open from the start.
  • finny11122
    finny11122 Posts: 8,436 Member
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    liftinggoddess123 wrote: »
    If he's not your ex then that works. I've never been able to stay on reasonable terms with people I've dated. I do that platonic relationships can exist just have to be honest and open from the start.

    I like that - open from the start . Never hold back and be a friend if you want more .
  • ilfaith
    ilfaith Posts: 16,770 Member
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    I have had many male friends over the years, but I will say that in most cases one of us was usually attracted to the other at some point in the relationship. But we were (or at least I can be certain that I was) able to move beyond these feelings and settle into a platonic relationship. I also have male friends of my husband that I acquired through marriage, and in many cases I prefer the men to their wives...in these cases, there is generally no physical attraction, but I tend to be drawn to them for the things they have in common with my husband.
  • gcibsthom
    gcibsthom Posts: 30,120 Member
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    Of course we can. I have had platonic female friends for years....and some were drop-dead gorgeous, and I might have slept with them under different circumstances. With one, we have been friends for 30 years, and though we both "fell in love" with each other, we didn't pursue it for various reasons. We actually almost got married, but knew that that would probably end our friendship...We are still best of friends to this day.
  • Kvm11628
    Kvm11628 Posts: 7,386 Member
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    I'm with @synchkat on this one. I have plenty of male friends that are totally platonic. I tend to get along better with men. Some I find very attractive and have been attracted to, but have been able to keep the relationship platonic. Not biding my time or hoping for more.

  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    I have several male friends I hang out with on a regular basis. Nothing but friendship going on.
  • Hey_Its_That_One_Guy
    Hey_Its_That_One_Guy Posts: 21,768 Member
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    Yes I have a couple. It's not hard if that's actually what you want. You have to be true to what you want though and that's where people have problems.
  • Peter_Brady
    Peter_Brady Posts: 3,750 Member
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    I have had several platonic relationships with women over the years. A former co-worker and I used to hit the bar 2-3 days a week after work. We sat at the bar and BS'd for hours then would go for a late night meal. Never did it lead anything. Had we not both switched jobs, I suspect we would still be friends. My best friend's wife and I were platonic friends for a year before those they got together. Quite frankly, I think most guys are douche bags.
  • muchmoretolove
    muchmoretolove Posts: 244 Member
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    yes, it is very possible; however, not in every scenario of course.
  • MYMKLIFE
    MYMKLIFE Posts: 1,193 Member
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    Yes it is

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