Kicking *kitten* In Our Twenties - February Challenge!!

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  • meagalayne
    meagalayne Posts: 3,382 Member
    Met my food goals today but sucked ROYALLY on my personal goals of not beating myself up over food... I had a total effing meltdown at the boy's house :sad: I went to keep him company and cheer him up (he's feeling sick) and ended up being the one in need of major counsel.

    Long story short - As soon as I get hungry, which is basically every hour or two (which is why my diary always looks like a bomb went off on the database), and I'm not at home in the safe confines of my kitchen with all my safe healthy options, I end up feeling REALLY stressed because I know I'm about 30 mins away from immense crankiness and have very few snack options that won't make me feel like *kitten* for eating them. Even at my boy's house, who is a relatively healthy eater, I just feel overwhelmed. And I think that 95% of my anxiety and stress comes from hating how obsessive and neurotic I am, to the point where I'd rather be hungry and under-eat than eat something that I haven't hand-picked to go into my mouth. Once dinner hour hit and we had NO dinner plans, I totally fell apart and lost it. It was a very frustrating and sad experience and it made me feel totally out of control and alone... :ohwell: And then I felt like a huge failure because I know that at this stage I should be feeling GOOD about my journey!

    One step forwards, two steps back, some days ladies... Back on track tomorrow and I'm going to work hard to feel better about ME.

    Step one - Stop obsessive over carbs. Yes I ate LOTS of carbs today. I was under my carb allowance but I still had oats, smartpop, pizza (really terrible and not worth it, but my ONLY option for dinner), and then 1/2 cup of frozen yogurt to use up some of my 675-odd calories left for the day... And then of course, guilt set in. So I need to CHILL. And step back. And maybe stop logging so much so that I am not freaking out daily about my carb intake. Breathe, Meag. Eat when you're hungry and eat the things you enjoy - food should be about more than just not starving to death.

    Tomorrow's going to be different.

    Sorry for not addressing your posts. Please be aware - once you hit your goals you are still going to be struggling with food, family, fitness, health and most of all yourself. This is a life-long journey. Hope you're ready for it!

    -Meag :heart:
  • meagalayne
    meagalayne Posts: 3,382 Member
    Meag- I love looking at your diary for suggestions. I think you are a great inspiration for those of us just starting on here. I would love the recipe for your turkey and 5 bean chili. Do you use a HRM? I would like a good one that does heart rate and distance.
    I'll get you the recipe tomorrow -- It's my mom's recipe but I know she just throws in whatever she's got on hand! Asked her to write it out for me one day and so I have one of about two dozen variations in my recipe folder.

    I use a Timex HRM and it work alright. Would recommend it for a mid-grade watch, but it's not perfect. Calculates my HR but not my distance or speed - I use a separate application on my phone for all my running stats called RunKeeper.
  • allie7383
    allie7383 Posts: 865 Member
    hey all! just a quick post as i go back and read through the last few pages lol. not so much going on for me at the moment.. i didn't Wi this week since i went to a superbowl party the night before, and i def don't need to see the scale be up as i was expecting it to be. yesterday was great and although i wasn't really in the mindset, i managed to bust out 4 miles at the park, with no walking! i was slowed down a bit however b/c portions of the walkways weren't totally clear of the compacted snow, but hey i'll take it! i had the night off so i caught up on sleep, but woke up today feeling completely lazy, and ended up eating like a monster all dang day. my mother took off work, and we had one guy installing a new door, another doing maintainence on our central air, and another that stopped by b/c our brand new stove is suddenly not working! wow was it crazy today.. oh and did i mention that i didn't work out either!
    thanks for the support for my upcoming GRE. i took it way back when in college, but ended up not going to grad school then. i'm not looking forward to sitting there getting lazy eye staring at the gray and white screen for 4 hours.

    so i've read briefly about this before and never really thought about it til now.. has anyone ever experienced fear of succeeding? i feel like i'm kinda going through that right now.. like i can't picture myself being at my goal weight (which is around 130), because i've always been the chubby girl, and i don't know, maybe the idea of actually not being that girl is scary, and almost impossible. i feel like that's been my place in life for so long, i don't know how to be anything else, and the fact that people are now referring to me as "skinny" is like beyond me at times. i've stopped telling people how much more i want to lose b/c they look at me like i'm crazy. just some random thoughts.. maybe i'm just looking for excuses. i'm just not as focused as i was a couple months ago and i'm finding it very hard to get back to that mindset.. maybe it's the winter too lol.. needed to get that out.

    meag- def do not stress! i've felt myself going there before, and on the verge of a freak out and it's not worth it. like i said, today i ate like pig and yes part of me is really upset about it, and feels totally ashamed, but on the other hand i'm like oh well, nothing i can do now, but start again tomorrow. take a deep breath and realize you can't have control over everything. it wouldn't be real life otherwise! you've done, and are still doing awesome and are inspiring to me and to many other people i'm sure, so here's a big hug and hope you feel better!! :flowerforyou:
  • finncmh
    finncmh Posts: 290
    Megteg- way to go with the C25k. that is so awesome! Its definitely a great training program… I have been struggling to fit running time in since I have changed my lifting routine up so much in the past weeks… all a part of the process though! Glad that it went well with the rents- embarrassing pictures are a must! Haha my fiancés dad just pulled out a WHOLE bunch that he wants us to use at the wedding in October- can we say embarrassing slide show coming right up? All good I love looking at them and see what he looked like when he was little and remembering being a little kid myself!!!

    Kbellnurse- TOM can be brutal! That lady that is RKC certified sounds pretty cool! I have been hearing similar things to cardio fasting- nothing huge just that if you do some cardio (we aren’t talking crazy long distance runs) in the am before you eat it forces your body to go to its stored fat. It’s a moot point for me really since I cant get my butt out of bed early enough to work out in the am.


    Hilhall822- welcome to the group!

    Meredith- I too tried the BB Brownies last night. Not too shabby definitely didn’t notice the black beans but I am trying to stay away from all the extra stuff in processed food so the mix kinda throws a kink in that plan. It is nice to have a go to emergency dessert that is healthier if I am going to parties or anything! Glad you enjoyed the pizza!!!

    Rachellynch83- hahahaha I SO know how you feel with the 30DS- I have been lifting pretty regularly for months now and Jillian can still kick my butt on the days when I cant get to the gym and I pop her in. There is just something about that constant movement and her exercises that forces you to use muscles you didn’t know you had… hehehehe. She definitely is a crazy lady!

    Melissa- YAY for signing up for the half and LOVE that your daughter is excited about doing her run! No worries about the gain you deserved a fun night and it was a conscious choice!

    Meag- you never cease to amaze me in everything you do! You are a constant rock for me on here and I hope that I can be even half of that support to you when things are crazy (ok enough mushy corny crap) KNOCK it off! Be nice to yourself and stop beating yourself up… alright I have officially tried two tactics to show my kicking *kitten* love for you- hopefully one of them works… hehehehe

    KanCrav- don’t beat yourself up. Just jump back on the horse and keep on trucking we are here for you!

    Aly- as always LOVE your blog posts! I have the same struggle but opposite- I have a really good consistent lifting routine and I have been struggling to get more running time in (I want to increase my distance but at the same time I have committed to making lifting my priority right now to keep losing weight… all in good time I guess. And what tactic do I need to use on you?!?!?! Sounds to me like you have needed a training break for a while now- prlly more emotionally than physically. You have been working so hard and the end result (HAWAII!!!!) will totally be worth it and then after that I DEMAND that you pamper yourself mind and body for a few days or weeks. Only doing exercise for fun and when you want to and NOT beating yourself up about it and coming to US to kick your *kitten* when you start to…. Can you guys tell I am wound up yet? Seriously though its all in love and wanting everyone on here to succeed in a way that is healthy and enjoyable- its all about the journey my dears! Oh ya I LOVE that you sing eye of the tiger when you are swimming.

    Guam- so glad to have you back lady. Don’t give up- just setback. You totally have this- especially since you have all of us in your corner cheering for you!

    SeeCrystal- I am totally with you on the legs thing. My leg workout the other day totally kicked my butt and did the same thing! OY!

    Megan- you are a machine with the spinning and running. How did it go yesterday with the running? I had another lifting day yesterday so I only did walking/running intervals. Today is my rest day from lifting so I am going to go for the longer run. EEEK- im a little behind and the legs are still sore from lifting on Monday so we shall see how it goes!

    Jbars- balancing life is tough especially when it comes to the emotional balance. You just have to push through it. That is the only answer. I used to do the same thing to myself and there are days when I still want to, but then I remember that working out has become my therapy. Its my me time and it’s the only time during the day when I can completely zone out and not worry about or think about real life. Just figure out what works for you and push yourself to at least do one little thing each day- soon you will find it turning in to more and more. Maybe don’t come up with such a black and white schedule of what you are going to do for now. Maybe just say ok no matter what I am going to at least get in 30 minutes of some form of workout today. Don’t psych yourself out on the 30DS- do something else for now until you are really ready mentally to do it. You got this!

    Spell- changes in our routine can be so tough. Enjoy the time with family and friends though and know that you will get right back to it when you are ready! Great job on the loss!

    Mike- so glad to have you back. Sorry about your loss but glad to hear that you are ready to be back. We are here for ya!!!!

    Rachellynch83- LOVE when we can get other people motivated to workout. Wish that I was closer to some of my family so I could workout with them more!

    Tara- my legs are STILL sore… ahahahahaha! OY. I like your mantra that your yoga instructors have you do. I have to remember that one. Good luck with your WI

    Gonks- I am with you on the sore as hell part. Last week I didn’t get much in either with the trip to NYC and getting sick down there- so this week is kicking my butt but it feels good to be sore again. Good luck with the submission!

    Allie- good to see you back here! Missed ya lady! I have struggled with the fear of succeeding for years. I don’t know why recently I am not afraid of it- maybe it has something to do with I am doing this right for the first time ever and I finally really feel like I deserve it. But that is definitely a real struggle and a really rough one to struggle through. Just keep focusing on the here and now and take it one day at a time.

    QOTD- I don’t really have one. When I am lifting I don’t listen to any music I just sort of zone out on what I am doing and its actually really nice. I don’t have to think about anything else going on in life and the craziness. My mind completely empties itself (and I people watch of course too). Running on the treadmill is where I could use a mantra. Gotta work on that one!


    AFM- another lifting workout yesterday. It was my push day:

    10minutes walking at 3.5 for warm up with stretching

    Chest:
    Bench Press with bar
    Incline Bench Press with Dumbbell
    Butterfly chest press

    Shoulders:
    Arnold Press
    Straight Row
    Side Raise with DB
    Front Raise with DB

    Triceps:
    Ropes
    Skull Crushers

    Upper Abs:
    Crunches
    Incline bench sit-up

    Then I did walking/running:
    3min running at 5.0
    2min walking at 3.5
    2min running
    1min walking
    1min running
    30sec walking
    1min running
    30 sec walking
    2min running
    1min walking
    Cooldown

    Felt good legs are sore this morning. Tonight is my long run. We will see how it goes!
  • ngoat
    ngoat Posts: 97 Member
    Well I have been absent for awhile and I know that is just hurting my sucess rather than helping it. I have been successfully logging my calories everday (and staying under) and doing okay on working out. I have decided to start blogging. I have only done two.. but I think this will be good for me to get my thoughts out without having to ramble on my posts here.

    My apologies for not reading up on how everyone is doing, but I plan on doing it today.

    AFM: I have been pretty down lately. Not sure the exact reason, but I am sure it is the usual.. having no one , besides my husband to talk to. Now I don't want a pitty party or anything, but it would be nice to have some friends.... I think my mood definatly is effect my motivation to work out, considering it wasn't very much in the first place. As far as weight loss, I have been hanging out at 128 for two weeks now.. i am hopeing to get into the exercise gear and maybe loss something this week. Sugar has been takeing over lately too, so crossing my fingers that I can get that under control.

    Best of Wishes and Support to Everyone!! and i hope to give some feedback soon.
  • Morning Group!

    @Meag: As you know from my previous posts i am a total food freak-out-er and empathize with you on that.I'm glad that you were able move past it and plan for how to overcome it in the future. I could learn a thing or two from you :wink:

    @rachel: I have no idea what field I want to get into yet. Done a few clinical rotations in different places. I enjoyed surgery, and medicine. Don't think that peds or pysch is really my thing. I guess we will see where I decide to do my final practicum and then see if anywhere is hiring that I like! Where do you work?


    I went over my calories last night. (I think I just reworded that phrase about 3 times.) I really need to not let it be such a defeating phrase. I did not binge, I did not go wild, I just went a bit over. My husband and I were invited over to a friends for dinner (she is also trying to lose weight) and since we never do anything fun we had to go. I offered to bring dessert (ulterior motives so that I could control the dessert!! haha) and I made a Berry Crumble that was verrry good. She made a squash soup for dinner that was delicious and not too calorific. The problem was that dinner was much later than I am used to eating and when I got home from school I was very hungry. i hadn`t spread my snacks out very well so I didn`t have any ``calories left`` to snack. Since I am incapable of managing hunger (except right before bed) i snacked. I had a handful or so of granola, about 20 pistachios and (eek) half of my husbands 100cal ice cream sandwich. At dinner there were also those delicious little bread slices to eat your soup with and i had a couple. I`m trying to view the day as a victory because the old me would have come home and stuffed her face because she`d ``already screwed it up anyway`` but I didn`t. It`s just extra depressing because I`ve been weighing myself (illegally!! It`s supposed to be only tuesdays) and thanks to my TOM the scale is saying higher than last week! Anyway...enough venting..Today is a new day and it will be fab!

    I started my morning with my new experimental `fasted cardio`(ish). the DVD i requested from the library isn`t in yet so I did a Leslie Sansone walking thing on youtube. It was two miles in about 20-25 minutes or so? It was pretty easy..very easy. But it did get my heart rate up a bit (btw 104-112ish). I felt a little sheen of sweat but nothing too serious. I was reading some reviews and some of her DVD"s are supposed to be a bit more challenging, so hopefully the one from the library is. It's a good easy workout to use in conjunction with a more challenging one later in the day. Really wish I could just go outside. (correction: wish I wasn't a wuss and WOULD go outside to walk). I will probably take the dog to the library either today or tomorrow (a 45min walk) and I am doing a kettlebell w/o later today.
  • mkingraham
    mkingraham Posts: 445 Member
    Good Morning Everyone-

    Ugh- today has sucked so far. :( My run did not go as planned, and I am trying to not let it get me down and try again tomorrow but thats hard to do!! So I am just a blah day and I'm trying to pep my self up. When I have more time I'll respond to everyone.

    Hope you guys are having a better hump day!

    Megan
  • GuamGrly
    GuamGrly Posts: 600 Member
    Good Morning all!! Well its morning for me still! :happy: I am going to attempt to respond to everyone although I know I will miss a few.

    Meredith - hope all goes well on Valentine's Day. My boyfriend and I have yet to discuss plans on or around that day. And although this guy may not be "the guy" at least you can enjoy his company until you do find "the guy"!!!! And what size pan did you use for the brownies?

    Aly - sounds like a break is definitely in order. Hopefully after lavaman, you will be able to kick start your intermission in Hawaii. And then once you return home, you will need to figure out how to fit in working out without letting it overtake your life both physcially and emotionally.

    Nancy - completely feel your pain...minus the hubby!! I am sure the girls that I work with get tired of hearing my continuous rants. My best friend lives in Colorado and we usually talk on a regular basis unless she is going through a crisis (which is right now) and then nothing I say is right because she doesn't want to hear the truth and then I end up back at square one. Hopefully things will turn around for you.

    Kbell - then victory it is!! Your day could have gone much worse so take your victory and run with it!!

    Megan - hopefully your day will turn around!! :flowerforyou: I went to bed feeling kinda blah last night because of the decisions I made last night but I feel rejuvenated this morning and ready to face the world!!

    Meag - I know you know what you need to do to relinquish control or at least be able to make each situation work for you. You are a strong woman and have proven that to yourself on numerous occasions. Whether we are losing or maintaining, we all have to find some sort of balance in our lives. I hope that you can find what works for you...in all situations and be comfortable with it. *hugs*

    Cait - you are on fire this morning!! Look at you go!! And nice workout there!! I wish I had more time to devote to working out.

    AFM...feeling pretty damn good today! I had another early day at work today so I packed my workout clothes and plan on hitting the gym before I pick up my daughter from daycare and before I head out to pick up my son from his dad's house. And then tonight I get to see my boy!! So...sounds like it should be a pretty good day!

    I hope that you all have a great hump day!!
  • Hi hi :glasses:

    Today is my weigh in day and I'm down 1 more pound. I'm pleasantly surprised by that. I dealt with temptation this weekend and put my healthy choice practicing skills into action. I was out of town with some girls for Pampered Chef and I was nervous...snacks, drinks and eating out....but over all I think I did pretty darn good. A 1lb loss is a loss and I'm proud of it. Not to mention I came home to Superbowl Sunday with our Green Bay Packers in it so I wasn't sure what the scale had in store for me. I did water aerobics again last night and I'm loving my Tuesday/Wendesday routine...just starting to wish there were more options for water classes at my Y....

    So happy that I got such great encouragement about not letting the blahs ruin my progress so far and to just let yesterday be yesterday and bounce back!! I'm hoping the blahs are behind me......It's funny all I had to do was ask my hubby for a little help and you'll never believe it...he helped me. Ha ha ha I say this jokingly because that is one of my biggest downfalls...I never ask for help....so I mentioned my previous frustrations to him and he took my grocery list and did all the shopping and then some before I got home from work. Today packing my lunch and snacks were a breeze...I had so many healthy yummy options....:heart::heart: :heart: Life is good today!!!

    mking- hang in there! I know exactly how you're feeling....I get very stressed and bummed out when working out doesn't go as planned....

    kbell- HOORAY for you!! :flowerforyou: I would seriously consider that a HUGE success. I know exactly what you mean about the old you. The old me would have convinced my husband to stop on the way home for custard or a blizzard since my day was shot with a couple of bread slices!!!

    finncmh- you just said a mouthful there! Exercise is becomming my therapy and I love it! It was just what the dr. ordered yesterday. I went 45 minutes early and sweat out my frustrations and then enjoyed my water aerobics class....and I left it all at the gym. I think it's so funny because I used to love working out, then I put on all of my weight and I was embarassed for people to judge me at the gym for my size....PAH! I'm over that and I already can't wait for my class after work. Thanks for the kind words....always help so much!!!:smile:

    guamgrly- of course I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to help support you in anyway and I would LOVE support of any kind. I can't say enough how much I love this website and this thread and all of the awesome people I have been in contact with because of the two!!

    meag- chin up friend! I once had someone tell me that 95% of the time people are doing the best they can. You're working on it...I'm sure you're doing the best you can. With time I hope it all gets easier for you...you're too awesome of a girlie to not get past it. We are all works in progress :flowerforyou:


    p.s. Kbell- berry crumble??? YUMMMMMMM care to share the recipe??
  • shelsab
    shelsab Posts: 138 Member
    Guamgrly: You can do it! good luck on balancing everything and starting the C25k program

    Melissa: Congrats on signing up for your 1/2!! I cannot wait when I am ready to do that, but that will still be a few months and its really exciting that your daughter gets to participate!

    Rachelly: thats alot of pills! Good job for trying to take care of it in other ways. When I was 7 I was diagnosed with migraines and they wanted me to take pills 3 times a day forever. I did it for a couple years and then stopped. They went away for a yr and then came back, but I just deal with it as it comes.

    jnlynch: Hope you are feeling better!!

    Meag: that protein shake sounds good. I love chocolate!! But I would avoid the peanut butter since I am allergic to it. Great job on your run this morning and good luck on your 15k this weekend!

    finn: That sounds like an awesome workout! Great job on pushing yourself!

    old QOTD: on a typical saturday, depending on if I work. I volunteer to walk dogs up at the University, get in a good workout at the gym or run and have movie night with a good home cooked dinner. And of course errands ran in between of everything else.

    old QOTD: I love taking leftovers for lunch. Today is soup. Then I just add some fruit and veggies for my small breaks and its usually good.

    AFM: This week is starting out great! I am focusing on getting my whole grains as I recently was pointed out that I have not been getting my 3 servings of whole grain a day, so its been an eye opener to how much I really was not getting enough. Other than that I had a great break in Vegas visiting my family. The weather was pants and long sleeve weather!!! Which from SLC was amazing. I had brought home a huge jacket and didn't need it unless it was night time. I also snuck over to California to visit the boy since it will be a while since we can see each other since he's doing training. I hope everyone is having a good week!!
  • @jbars - I posted the recipe in a thread awhile ago, here it is! http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/164359-berry-breakfast-crumble-eat-clean-diet
    ps - I used to always convince my husband to get the blizzard! I know just how to play him so that he will do it too.. Good for us for not doing that anymore. :)

    AFM: I'm taking the day off of school to write a paper (I know - i'm terrible) but I need to get it friggin done! Just popping in during my "lunch break"..mmm stew. I'm gonna set the timer for 90mins of paper writing and then I "get" a workout (I hate papers so much my *kitten* kicking kettlebell routine is my reward! haha)

    ttyl, happy hump day! :heart:
  • lostalykat
    lostalykat Posts: 683 Member
    finncmh- Thank you so much for your response, I really needed someone to respond in a positive way like you did. After reading what you said I feel like a huge weight is off my shoulders, just wanted to let you know I appreciate your kind words.

    Guam- Thanks for your input as well, I struggle with so much and put so much pressure on myself, I need to realize that breaks are necessary.

    AFM- I am feeling better today, I was so tired and had a good cry when I got home. My boyfriend then made a bath for me and I soaked in it and just relaxed it was really nice. I really need to learn how to let myself relax and calm down, I have a huge problem with this, I think when I finish this race I am going to focus on yoga again. I know it will help not only my body but my mind. I have run group tonight then I think I am going to take a few days off before the race. I am going to test my bike friday evening to make sure everything is good with it for saturday but other than that I am going to have fun and relax. I already feel better thinking about it. My Week ends tomorrow and I am scared to see what the scale is going to say. But it is only one week and I can do better next one. It is going to be another hard weekend for me with a gf's bday party and valentines day dinner out, also dinner tomorrow night with my bff. Smart choices here I come!
  • spellbinder25
    spellbinder25 Posts: 331 Member
    Selfish Update:

    I managed to tidy up our home last night, help hubby with cooking & even got in my workout! Eating was so-so...I wish I had done better but it got really late last night and I felt like I needed to eat some more & have soda to stay up :(

    I've also been having pain in my lower back since Sunday. It was really bad on Sunday and then almost nothing for 2 days, until last night. Sometime while I was asleep it started again and I had difficulty sleeping. I tried different positions but nothing seemed to work. However, I did get sleep even though I could feel the pain all the time. I've never had this before, so not sure what the deal is. Wonder if it's because of running. I'm supposed to run 2.75 miles today but haven't been feeling good due to the back ache and, I think, I'm feeling low in general too. Not too sure about what/how I'm feeling but it's definitely not good :grumble:

    Anyway, if I don't feel good enough to run, I'll just do the elliptical for 30min or so. Planning on making the black bean brownies too tonight, though that'll again depend on how I feel after getting home.

    Hope everyone's doing well!!
  • finncmh
    finncmh Posts: 290
    Afternoon Ladies and Mike!

    Meag recently posted a link to a blog post from ohsheglows.com. Meag is the one that got me addicted to her blog and she is also the one that got me drinking Green Monsters. So big props to Meag!!!! Thanks lady.

    Just wanted to share the link to the blog that Angela (the woman that does ohsheglows) put up today. I know that it really hit close to home for me and I am hoping that it will be a good read for some of you on here the past few days struggling with the emotional aspects of self image, weight loss, and life in general. Kinda about just being in the moment for today and focusing on that and only that!

    Definitely a great read today and a wonderful blog to follow if you do any blog reading!

    http://ohsheglows.com/2011/02/09/do-what-you-cantoday/

    -Cait
  • finncmh
    finncmh Posts: 290
    Ok so here is a cool quote for everyone something about it just resonates with me:

    "Don't seek, don't search, don't ask, don't knock, don't demand- relax. If you relax, it comes. If you relax, it is there. If you relax, you start vibrating with it" Osho

    ok a little cheesy but it just reminds me to let life happen sometimes and not try to control everything so much (definitely something I want to work on more)

    Cait
  • meagalayne
    meagalayne Posts: 3,382 Member
    Hey everyone! I'm being REALLY sh*tty about replying to you all, but I promise I'll be back at it tomorrow... Today has been hectic with workouts and cooking and trying to *not* obsess over logging. I am reading everything and I still love my MFPeeps. Promise :wink:

    Cait - Thanks for posting the OHGs blog today. Haven't had time to read it yet but it looks like a keeper! And it definitely looks like it will resonate with me, too... My new yoga instructor read a passage from some uber-cheese book today that was similarly apropos to my current state. It was all about worry and stress being the manifestation of fear and the opposite of love for oneself. I need to get back to loving me and to stop worrying about that which I cannot control - AMEN! :bigsmile:

    Anyway, I had a good workout today for about 100 mins at the gym, got a decent run, and spent some quality "me" time in the kitchen making really healthy food. Haven't been checking my carbs for the day and I'm feeling relaxed so far. Good news!

    Thank you everyone for your words of encouragement. Really feeling the love from this group when I need it most :happy: I will be back late tonight to respond thoroughly to everyone's posts. I have LOTS to comment on but no more time right now. TTYS!
    -Meag :heart:
  • Happy mid-week all! Sorry I haven't posted since joining but I haven't had much time, though I have been trying to keep up with the posts!

    @kbell - I hear the staying home from class to write a paper for another one, it feels like a game of musical chairs sometimes for me also trying to get papers done while managing class schedule - as long as they all get done, doing something right I figure! Also, that berry crumble recipe looks amazing, I'll have to try making it once reading week rolls around and some extra time kicks up!

    @cait - thanks for sharing it, that's a great quote and an excellent thing to remember *...goes to write it down :)

    @meag so glad to see you're feeling better now - and kitchen "me" time is the best! Cooking and making awesome food can be so enjoyable and cathartic

    AFM-It's been a great week so far and have stuck to my workout schedule, though I suspect I will be waking up in the morning tomorrow unable to move after pushing it harder than I had before in the gym today. The scale is not budging yet from last week though, which is frustrating as I've stuck closely to my workouts and been meticulous about logging. But I'm trying to just stay focused on that I feel a huge difference already in strength and endurance which seems to be more so each time, and the difference on the scale/measurements will come. Time to start longer and more intense cardio more often it would seem. I'm a big fan of the elliptical but am interested in learning to run, which is totally out of my comfort zone. If anyone has any sage words of wisdom on switching it up they would be much appreciated!

    Sorry for not responding to everyone, just getting into the swing of this thread still apparently :ohwell:
  • tjradd73
    tjradd73 Posts: 3,495 Member
    Gonks-glad to see that you are back into the swing of things!

    Meredith-when I thought about the fact that I hadn't had fast food since Septemeber I was really surprised!! I used to eat it a few times/week!! it is very exciting too, that I rarely have any cravings for it! woohoo!

    Aly- even if your swim wasn't the best (in your mind) the important thing is that you still did it! so WTG!!

    Meag-you are a strong person and cannot be"perfect" at everything, all of the time! take your own advice and breathe, it's all about the baby steps!

    Allie-I feel ya on your last post (all around)! I have always been the chubby girl as well...with todays WI I am only like 7lbs out of my normal weight range and am totally having a hard time grasping that!! also i have had people tell me constantly..."you need to stop...you are gonna look sick if you keep going much further!" I mean come on, I am not even at the TOP of my healthy weight range yet!! i have just been ignoring them..I know what is healthy for me, and I know when I will be happy, and I will stop when I am damn ready!! LOL

    Cait-thanks for the quote! and awesome WO again!!

    Nancy-no need to be bummed about your "plateau"...you are getting down there with your weight and it just is going to take time to lose those last few lbs that you want...don't give up!!

    Guam-WTG on staying on track this week!! you are rockin once again!

    jbars-great job on the loss!

    spell-take it easy and i hope your back feels better soon :)

    echo-you are doing great so far...keep it up!!

    AFM-weekly check-in: 4/3 days done on abs, 3/3 days done on arms, 5/7 days under sodium, 7/7 days over on water, and 1216/1000 calories burned!!! as far as my WI went today...I lost 2.2lbs (towards my 6lb goal)!!!!! HOORAY!
  • meagalayne
    meagalayne Posts: 3,382 Member
    OK quick un-selfish post finally. I desperately need to get to bed on account of last nights epic sleep-fail but I wanted to reply to a few of you first. Then me-time in bed. I think I'm going to be getting up early tomorrow to get a good workout in again, and then lots of stuff to keep my busy during the day, plus a shift at work at night. Fun day! But my weekend plans kick *kitten* so it's allll worth it! :bigsmile:

    Allie - Great run yesterday at the park - You are rocking the runs and I am SO proud of your progress! Really grasping success and feeling proud of yourself and your weight loss can be *hard*. I mean, just look at me! haha I still struggle every day and can't recognize myself in pictures, even after so long. It's a LONG journey! When people tell me I'm thin/fit/lean whatever or that I look like a runner I'm like "Pffffft yea, ok. You mean an OBESE runner, right?!?!" :huh: Wait a minute... Totally all in my head. You just need for your head to catch up with the rest of you. It takes a lot of time and a lot of positive self-talk. Take it from me! But you'll get there. We all will :happy: Re-read the advice you gave to me for yourself this time. You have come so far and your progress is truly inspiring. So feel better and don't be afraid to be the BEST you possible <<<hugs back>>>

    Cait - Read your profile :tongue: hahahah! Thanks for the motivation and love, girlie. It means so much to me :bigsmile: BTW your W/O looks totally boss. What a freaking all-star in the gym. You definitely owe me a training sesh some day hahaha!

    Nancy - This can definitely be a very lonely road to travel... When I move back from school I didn't know a single person and until I met my boyfriend I pretty much hung out solo all the time. I still don't have many friends locally and it's hard, for sure. Can be very isolating and depressing. Maybe try to find some workout buddies at the gym? Join some classes, or take a general interest class at a local night school? Putting yourself out there is the hardest part but you can reap so many incredible benefits if you take that first step. Good luck and I hope you feel better!! :flowerforyou:

    Guam - Thanks lady - So much :heart: Glad to hear you're still rocking it and making it all fit, despite your hectic crazy busy life. I'm in awe of your time management skills! :laugh: Hope you had a great time tonight with the boy!

    jbars - AWESOME loss! 1lbs is freaking fantastic! very solid, steady and healthy loss, especially with the superbowl and all that goes along with it! You should be mega proud :bigsmile:

    kbell - That berry crumble looks/sounds AMAZING. Ohhh my gosh! Thanks for the recipe, lady! :drinker:

    shelsab - Try omitting the PB in favour of another healthy fat - ground flax seed, other nuts, or avocado work great! you can also add pasteurized egg whites for an added protein boost. The possibilities are endless. I've tried all of the above and they all work out great :bigsmile:

    Aly - You're doing awesome with WW and managing your choices and your "treats" - Really proud of you lady. I know it's been a tough road, especially the last little while. And boy do I know how stressful it can be. So lucky to have your boy there to have your back when you need some help de-stressing. I too struggle with anxiety and getting MEGA overwhelmed when the boy's not around to help ground me. Not sure what advice to give - breathe deeply, try to distract yourself, and think about the little things you do have control over. Those tend to help me a little. Or bath and a glass of wine :laugh: Whatever works!

    echo - Thanks girl! :happy: Great job staying on track and being diligent with your W/Os!! It is really going to pay off! If you want to start running, check out the C25K plan that many of the ladies on here are working through. It's a great intro to running and will help to introduce you to the sense of accomplishment and pride that runners feel in their "runners highs" early on, which will propel you to succeed a lot faster than just running to run (how I started and took 6 months to get ANYWHERE! :grumble:). I cannot extol the awesomeness of C25K and running generally enough! I am a junkie now and I freaking love the stuff!

    K getting to bed. Strength and run in some capacity tomorrow. We'll see what form they take when I get up! :bigsmile:
    Sleep well, sweet dreams and catch all you homies on the flip side :glasses:
  • KanCrav
    KanCrav Posts: 439 Member
    deep breath... Im gonna try to comment on more than two peoples posts here... (dun dun DUNNN)

    First of all, before I even start to attempt this I need to point something out. Im not sure If you guys noticed it but there are alot of similar feelings going on here in the last few days. It is actually the same thing I came to realize at my meeting on Tuesday. I realized that I put WAY too much pressure on myself. Pressure to eat right, to get sober (and STAY that way), pressure to workout EVERYDAY, pressure to make everyone in my liife happy, pressure to get on MFP (EVERYDAY)..... and the list continues. So becuase I put all this pressure on myself to do all these things, when something doesnt get done, i feel like *kitten*. I have convinced myself that if I dont do EVERYTHING correct EVERYDAY then I am a faliure. So do you guys think that? Look what you all told me, "Kandace, dont freak out its only 2 days, get back on the horse, your doing great" (that was pretty much everyone in one sentence...lol)

    Anyway, my point is that all you ladys (ALY, Meag you better be reading this) are doing very well and shouldnt be so hard on yourselves. We can't control every aspect in out lives. Even if we could, what fun would that be? Everyone here works VERY hard to do the right thing as much as possible. If we dont let ourselves have fun and let go every once in a while, why are we trying so hard? I dont want to get all religious and preachy so I am gonna hold back on the rest of my rant.

    But guys, its Feb 2011, look at everything you have all accomplished up til now. Be proud of yourselves.



    ~ALY... Thank you for the encouraging words... YOU are doing great.

    ~Radd... Thank you for helping me get off my butt and to stop feeling sorry for myself! Congrats on the 2 pounds!!! (I think I found the ones you lost)

    ~Melissa... Its totally awesome that you do runs with your daughter. Its nice to see that some parents are teaching their children healthy habits.

    ~Guam... Im glad you got out that rant. It always helps to get things off your chest. Sometimes I have to say something out loud to REALLY get it. You are doing really great. Your life is soo crazy right now and you still find time to workout, I can tell you are very motivated. Stick with it, things will get easier.

    ~Meag... Its hard for me to imagine you having a hard day. You are always soo full of encouragment and great ideas! YOU are my inspiration most days, especially when I don't think I can get myself outside to jog. Be proud of yourself and everything you have accomplished so far.
    Try to let someone do something for YOU this weekend. Just one thing... see how that feels.
    I dare you!~!

    ~Kbell.... can you explain this Fasted Cardio thing to me? I know you are testing it out yourself right now, how is it going??? Do you still have energy left after? Are you CRAZY hungry??? Sometimes when I wake up I am starving, I couldnt imagine how hungry I would be if I did cardio then tried to eat, I might eat my whole kitchen!!!!!

    ~JBars... Congrats on the lost!~!~! keep doing what your doing, they all add up!~!

    ~eChoic... your doing a really good job. It sounds like you are doing just about the same things I am trying to do. I have been trying to learn to run also. I am also a BIG fan of the eliptical but all the woman here LOVE to run so I gave it a shot. I got really bad shin splints and instead of looking into it, I just kept running thinking that after a few days it would go away or get stronger.. WRONG!~! well I am back on the eliptical but running was fun. It was fun to try to beat my time the day before. So give it a try. Let me know how it goes. Just go slow..lol.. dont kill yourself or you might get discouraged like I did!~!~! Good Luck!

    ~AFM.... I think I should end this now, this might be the longest post I ever did,.. I apologize for the rant in the begining, if it bothered anyone. I am not doing very well today. I think I am still going through some left over feelings from drinking this weekend. But I made it to the meeting Tuesday and I am going tonight. My stress level is much better today then it has been in the past few days, but my body is SOO DONE. I woke up last night with my knee locked up (3 times!~!) and last week I hurt my shoulders at the gym.. they STILL hurt.. I think I pulled something. And i did that ruck march last weekend with 15 pds so Im sure that didnt help any. I am going to ALLOW myself to nap today so I dont freak out later. (try not to control myself tooo much)
  • wardiemelissa
    wardiemelissa Posts: 365 Member
    @Melissa: it's so great that your race has the kids marathon option. I'm sure you and your daughter are going to have so much fun preparing for it and running it!!

    Thanks!!! It is so fun (and quite comical) watching her run-she has no athletic ability!!! She :heart:'s getting the certificates and medals...and we always take pic's of the 2 of us together with our bibs on and she has made a little photo album with the pics...
  • wardiemelissa
    wardiemelissa Posts: 365 Member

    Melissa- YAY for signing up for the half and LOVE that your daughter is excited about doing her run! No worries about the gain you deserved a fun night and it was a conscious choice!

    Thanks!!! Almost back to normal with the weight...thinking it was all water weight?
  • meagalayne
    meagalayne Posts: 3,382 Member
    Kan - Love the long post! :laugh: Maybe it makes me feel a little better about bogarting all the space on this board most days! haha

    Great job making the meeting and sticking with your commitment to yourself. That's #1. And appreciate the rant. We definitely all need to give ourselves a break once in a while, especially with the time and hard work we're all putting in. We kick *kitten* and need to be our own best coaches and motivators - not our biggest critics. It's easier said than done of course so it's great to have a groups of ladies here that will shake some sense back into us when we can't just *relax* on our own! Big ups for the internet filling that gap when it counts :drinker: haha

    As for running/shin splints/feeling discouraged - There are a few reasons you may have gotten shin splints when you started running and there are number of ways to mitigate for them in the future if you want to give running another go. I know plenty of people (Gonks, where are you girl - back me up!) that started out with awful shin splints and have worked around them with stretching, making sure they have the right shoes, making sure they take it slow and listen to their bodies, and being diligent with maintaining good running form. It IS possible to work around them if you want to run, but you are right - running through the pain is BAD NEWS. It's good that you stopped before doing any major damage, but you can definitely look into solutions for it if you want to try it again.

    I know that a good portion of the time running is just too difficult for people that still have more than 25lbs or so to lose, because of the added stress and impact, so maybe just wait until you're lighter and give it another go? Those would be my suggestions to anyone, really... Running is SUCH a positive force in my life and is probably the single most rewarding thing I've ever done for myself. I really just wish that I could share that with everyone!

    Another extremely rewarding and positive force in my life? This group! Man! :drinker: :bigsmile: :drinker: I love this place and every month when I see how much good people are getting from it, and all the messages I get from women saying how inspiring it is (not to mention reaping the benefits myself), really makes me feel fortunate to have e-met all of your wonderful ladies and started up this group with a few of you veterans those many months ago. Really feeling lots of love for you all today :heart: (/mushy lame after school special blathering)

    Not sure if I'll be able to get my workouts in today but I know that it's beyond my control. Feels like -27C (-16F) out right now and that's just WAY too cold to be running in the wind. It's a fact. I'm going to try and get some nerdfitness done, perhaps. An old-y but a good-y, since I can't make it to Bootcamp this morning without a car. Kind of a bummer since I have a 21 hour day today, with a shift at work tonight, and that means a LOT of eating... Going to NOT stress about it and if I go over, so be it! Hope everyone else is having more luck with their workouts!
    Meag :heart:
  • lostalykat
    lostalykat Posts: 683 Member
    First I want to say I love all the support I get on here. I really feel better about everything having like-minded people to talk to about stuff. It is hard when you get so busy and don't have a lot of time for a close circle of friends. This gives me that outlet that I need :) Love you guys!

    Kancrav- Thanks for the encouraging words, I know all too well that it is harder to practice what I preach but it is getting better with time. I have been at this weight loss journey for 2 years now and I am not going to stop because I had an off week or day!

    AFM- I weighed myself today and it was only up .5 lbs. I am not going to let it get to me. I have been doing so well these past 2 months and I am going to continue to fight. .5 up after losing between .8 and 1.8 the last 3 weeks is really not that bad. I am not going to let it get to me. I am still down about 4 pounds since January. I had a good run yesterday at training. We did stairs again and my knee was a little upset again. I think all the biking this weekend made it extra sensitive. Even with a bum knee and after doing 24 minutes of running stairs I was able to do a 10:45 mile so I am feeling proud. I woke up this morning and I could not sleep. I considered going to the gym to try the strength class, or try to swim but it was 5am and I went to bed at 11. I decided to do 25 minutes of Jillian Michaels and I am glad I did. I have a dinner date tonight so I need to plan my meal ahead of time. I am taking tomorrow off since my race is Saturday. i am excited/nervous. I know I can do it and I am going to Kick *kitten*!!

    I put some chicken, brown rice, can of diced tomatoes, black beans and seasoning in the crockpot last night so I would have something yummy for lunch with no stress! Figuring this out one day at a time heh.
  • wardiemelissa
    wardiemelissa Posts: 365 Member
    LAST selfish-ish post (hopefully) got the new webstick last night and the hubby reinstalled it so pending me getting all my stuff done in a timely fashion I should have some time to respond to all of you! I have been doing much better and am pretty much back to my pre-dinner and superbowl weight...thinking most of it was due to the increased amount of adult beverages that I consumed!!!

    Didn't get to run on Tuesday...did the whole roller skating bit with my daughter. I forgot how much I enjoyed roller skating! My daughter was pretty hilarious on skates! But we had fun-that's what counts! Making up for the lost 4 miles throughout the week!

    Thanks for all the well wishes on the 1/2 and signing my daughter up too. I wouldn't say that she will stick with it...she is pretty unathletic...but just the mere fact that she has taken an interest in something that I LOVE makes me happy-I think she does it partly because it's time spent together :heart:

    Was supposed to run 40 min tempo yesterday-added another mile to make up for it. Supposed to run 3 miles and strength tonight-going to try to do 4...we shal see!!!

    KanCrav-totally agree with you on the pressure!!! I think now we all know we can do this and we expect WAY to much from ourselves and get down with the slightest slip up!!! I remind myself daily I didn't lose the weight overnight...it is a lifestyle change not a fad!!!

    Tj-great job on getting everything in and the loss!!!

    Love ya all!!!
    Melissa:heart:
  • mkingraham
    mkingraham Posts: 445 Member
    Good Morning! And this time it is good! I made a concious decision to have a good day today! Guess what- it's working :).

    Got on the treadmill and did W5D1 of C25K this morning- and rocked it! It felt really good and I think I am going to do the following workouts for the next week:

    Friday: Spin Class
    Saturday: Rest (visitng my friends new born baby :))
    Sunday: W5D1 C25K
    Monday: W5D2 C25K
    Tuesday: Spin Class
    Wednesday: W5D2 C25K
    Thursday: Boot camp
    Friday: W5D3 C25K
    Saturday: W5D3 C25K
    Sunday: Rest

    So that will have me hitting my 2 miles non-stop by the end of Feb on Feb. 12! Which would be awesome. I think by doing each day twice it will help.

    For those of you who have done C25K I know a lot of people repeat weeks, but have any of you ever done repeats in this manner?

    Any who- Like I said at the beginning, with a concious effort to be in a good mood I am feeling way better and proud of myself. Yippee!

    I hope all of you ladies are too and thank you so much for the support. I think everyone has been right- to much stress/pressure on ourselves makes it easy for disappointment to creep in. No more creeping!

    Have a kick *kitten* day!!

    Megan
  • meagalayne
    meagalayne Posts: 3,382 Member
    Megan - I LOVE your plan and I think it's a brilliant idea to repeat the runs in that manner... Slowly working your way up. Just make sure that you aren't running too much. It's recommended that beginners run not more than 3 times a week, max 4. So just be aware of your body and ease off a bit if red flags start going up. You are really making huge advancements and I'd hate to see them stifled by pushing too hard too fast. Rest days and variety are important so that your body doesn't feel too overworked. I only just recently (Jan) started running 5X per week and I am finding that to be a LOT of running, even after nearly a full year of training. Anyway, just a cautionary piece of advice. You know what's best for you and honestly, I love the plan! Doubling up on your training and extending your weeks to 10-14 days is a great way to a) log extra exercise, b) steadily increase your endurance, and c) keep yourself motivated by making small gains and repeating runs you KNOW you can finish. Yay! :drinker:

    Melissa - Your running is just crazy, woman :noway: You amaze me! I definitely love being able to look to you for inspiration and motivation when I am not feeling 100% about running. You are such an all-star runner and your commitment is really admirable. And I love that your daughter is giving it her best, even though you claim she's not very athletic -- I was terribly unathletic my WHOLE life; I have horrible balance, I'm incredibly awkward, no coordination, and really an awful runner (I looked so goofy as a child playing soft ball because my running was so pathetic). Things change and she's young! You never know :wink: You are definitely instilling a pretty positive attitude about health + fitness now and maybe that will carry through to her adolescence.

    Aly - Sounds like a great lunch - The crock pot is wonderful for easy, cheap meals when you are pressed for time. I'd recommend tossing in some chopped veggies to get the most of your meal though. Seems like a hassle to cut up veggies, and definitely takes some prep work, but it makes for a more balanced meal for sure and it bumps up the serving size to keep you fuller longer. It's also help to increase the fiber content and nutritional profile of your dish. Plus it's just yummy! Carrots, onions, bell peppers, or whatever else you have on hand would be great - low cal and adds another dimension to your dish. With chicken, rice, tomatoes and beans it makes a perfectly balanced meal! :bigsmile:

    -Meag
  • lostalykat
    lostalykat Posts: 683 Member
    Meag= I added onions last night and i have a bell pepper at work I am going to throw in it when I heat it up. We have a carrot too I didn't think about it last night at 10 when I was soo tired and had just gotten home from training. I will keep in mind and if anything bring the veggies with me to throw in when I microwave it to warm it up :)
  • What a wonderful thread to wake up to! Kancrav- Your words were so wonderful and so true!! We are always willing to help *pick someone up* when they're feeling down, and right there with encouraging words/congratulations for every little (but really big in the big picture) accopmlishment....why can't we be a little kinder to ourselves?!?!? Great food for thought! I personally know that pressure has been in my life in one form or another since I can remember....which has brought about stress/anxiety issues that I can also recall for about as long as I can remember...is this in our DNA?? Ha ha :laugh: Anyways I know it doesn't need repeating but I am so grateful for all of you :flowerforyou: Everyday I look forward to logging on and seeing how great everyone has done, catching up with the good and the bad and this really is a wonderful group....we are some pretty fanstastic ladies!!

    I have been reading about this C25K program and then saw that someone also mentioned it on here. I would love to be able to run...I live in Green Bay and there is a 10K annual run/walk called the Bellin here. It's huge and I'm thinking long term goal I would love to participate in June. I'm ok with even being a walker because I know that all my hard work between now and then will help give me the confidence to actually sign up. I'm even getting better at the gym!

    Speaking of the gym I have to share a little rant....:mad: I have a SIL that is thin, she runs 1/2 marathons and is very active. I have been working out and doing this for over a month now. On my own, and quietly (well as quietly as I can, but still speaking up for healthy options while dining with family etc. ) this is about me not everyone else. Well my SIL doesn't feel the same...she runs 1/2's and everyone needs to know about it....there are also some other small rather annoying issues but I digress....so she now has joined the Y where I go and has been trying to 'team up' with me and I'm not interested. First I am doing this for me...the gym is my new therapy and it's a party of 1 secondly I don't really think that my big (soon to be littler) behind would feel very good about myself sweating away next to skinny mcgee...also I don't work out so I can talk about it to everyone I see...that just isn't my style...I share with you all because this is a safe space to talk, ask, question, encourage etc. So last night I get home from water aerobics and my husbands family is over for dinner and she starts talking about oh my gosh I was at the gym at the same time as you, how was your class, what do you do, do you feel like you really get a work out in? I did the elliptical and lifted....' AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I don't know how to deal with this. I totally shut down at dinner and then all night my husband kept asking what was wrong, if I was upset and did I feel ok. She makes me feel like sh*# :ohwell: She isn't my favorite person to begin with...so sometimes I know I magnify things that she says....but it hurt my feelings and ticked me off. Then at the end of dinner she offered to make seafood alfredo lasagna...what a nice and supportive sister...I felt my rear-end get bigger just hearing about the recipe.
    Sorry for the rant but this one of the only safe places that I could really set that free......

    Happy Thursday!:tongue:
  • Ok so here is a cool quote for everyone something about it just resonates with me:

    "Don't seek, don't search, don't ask, don't knock, don't demand- relax. If you relax, it comes. If you relax, it is there. If you relax, you start vibrating with it" Osho

    ok a little cheesy but it just reminds me to let life happen sometimes and not try to control everything so much (definitely something I want to work on more)

    Cait

    I like this quote...even if it is a little cheesy :tongue: I am trying to find quotes that I can have in my office that will inspire me in different ways! This one made the board!!!
This discussion has been closed.