girls who like bad boys.
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you are so right!
WHY DO I PICK THE BAD ONES!?? 0 -
I do want to add that tattoos and Harleys don't make for bad guys. I'd much rather be stuck in a bar full of Harley dudes than a bar full of men in suits. At least with the Harley guys you know EXACTLY who they are. You never know what lurks under that suit. :noway:
I agree. Although, I could hold my own in either situation.
I think it is natures way of getting us to reproduce and repopulate the planet. In the wild, the strong survive. We obviously want our offspring to be strong and survive. Bad boys generally have more testosterone making them appear stronger and more likely to reproduce. We see the good guys as weak, therefore not the best to reproduce with because their offspring could also be weak. Unfortunately, even though our brains are more developed and CAPABALE of seeing through this we very often don't.
That being said, I know LOTS of 'bad boys' that are really terrific guys, and many 'good guys' that are super creeps. Not all people fit into the typical stereotypes- but there are stereotypes for a reason....0 -
our little secret :happy::flowerforyou:
Cant call without a number anubis :ohwell:
My number is 609. Shh...don't tell anyone.
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bad boys let it be known from the jump that they are ginormous douche canoes!
OMG this made me laugh out loud!!! I LOOOVE this. This is going to be my new 'go to' saying. Thanks chick!0 -
I seriously don't understand the attraction to big, bald, tattooed guys with motorbikes. Not a bit. I wouldn't look twice at someone like that, in fact, I'd cross the road to avoid them (yes, I am judgemental). They might be nice people inside, but I am put off by external projection of violence.
I like a man I can converse with as an equal, who is clean, and can answer my endless random physics questions, and who lets me be me without questioning or trying to change me.
It's one of those things.... "If I have to explain to to you, you just wont understand."
BTW, I know several 'bad boys' that are PhDs (some of them have more than one) and could talk circles around anyone without being pompous, have a great sense of humor, common sense, full of 'useless trivia', are advocates against violence and very genuine men.
Never judge a book by it's cover. This goes for ALL types of people. The bad boys, nice guys, girl next door or the tramp... everyone has something to offer. (Haven't you watched "The Breakfast Club"?!
Hopefully you surround yourself with people that you can trust and that you care about. In my life I have all kinds. My question about the people I surround myself with is this: "Would I trust you with holding the end of my rope if I was hanging off a cliff?" If that answer is no, I don't waste my time on you. Life is way too short to live with people that you can't trust fully.... or call at 4am to bail you out of jail...just sayin'. :bigsmile: My friends are the family that I have CHOSEN, why would I choose an idiot? I have plenty of them in the family I had no say in.0 -
QUOTED BY NIRSKY:
Crap, and I just sold my motorcycle.
Say it isn't so. That is one thing I will never get rid of, my motorcycle. There is a certain feeling being out in the open with that much power between your legs. It can be euphoric.
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!
*sorry, couldn't resist* :bigsmile: I'll get off the thread now....0 -
To the fathers who have posted on this thread, I can attest, as a young woman with a very protective father of my own, to the fact that how you are raising your daughters will have a tremendous impact on what kind of men they end up with. When my sister and I were growing up, my dad did and said some things that were pretty mortifying to us at the time.
For instance, if a man or even a teenage boy cursed in front of us, my dad would pull him aside and politely ask him to refrain from speaking that way in front of his daughters. It wasn't until I became an adult that I understood what he was trying to do ... he was teaching me a lesson about how I should expect to be treated.
When I was 13, he took me to lunch one day, just the two of us. He did all the things a gentleman should do for a lady (opening doors, pulling out chairs, etc.), and he said "Never date or marry a man who wouldn't treat you the way I would treat you." And that has stuck with me ever since. I am so thankful to have had such a good example in my life (along with my older brother) of what men are supposed to be. It has saved me a lot of trouble. So keep up the good work. If your daughters don't understand or appreciate it now, they will someday.0 -
Bad boys are just thrilling to be with.0
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is there not a saying about "nice guys coming 2nd" ????0
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As to the question about why girls like bad boys, I think there is a small biological component to it (i.e. being attracted to testosterone overload), but I think it mostly stems from two things: wanting to be the woman who saves someone from self-destruction or simply not thinking you deserve a good guy.
I have never dated a "bad boy," but I confess I went through a time in my life when I thought it might feel good to be the one who straightened out a bad boy. I think it's because women are nurturers, and we want to feel needed. Luckily, that was a quick phase, and I have no lingering, romantic delusions about trying to save someone from himself.
I actually think there is less mystery involved with being with a bad boy. You know there is a 99% chance he is going to hurt you or just leave you totally unfulfilled because you are never enough for him. But knowing how that story ends is easier than taking a leap of faith with a good guy because if a good guy decides to move on, it can be pretty soul-crushing.
Personally, I'm not interested in men who aren't interested in me and don't value what I have to offer. A man who asks me out properly, opens doors for me, makes sure I get home safely at the end of the night, etc., is a thousand times sexier and more masculine in my eyes than a man who thinks he's too much of a badass to worry about being a gentleman. That tells me that he cares way more about himself and his image than he'll ever care about me.0 -
is there not a saying about "nice guys coming 2nd" ????
Their girlfriends probably appreciate that....
.... just sayin' 0 -
is there not a saying about "nice guys coming 2nd" ????
Their girlfriends probably appreciate that....
.... just sayin'
FM !!!!!! hahahah0 -
When I was younger, I loved bad boys. I blame Han Solo.
I outgrew it, though.0 -
Why do we like bad boys? Do we like the sweet, cute boy down the street that would do anything for us? No. We like the boy that has the tattoos, a motocycle, and checks out other girls. He doesn’t call for a week, but then when he does… woah, that’s all we need, and we drop the nice, clean-cut boy who's waiting on you hand and foot. You know the one I’m talking about. The one that you have a hot, sexy 3 month, rendezvous with and then all of a sudden he’s dating his ex-girlfriend stripper? Maybe it’s all about attraction. Why cant we be attracted to the nice guy who’s good for us?
No, seriously I want an answer, not a rhetorical question.
This i actually know. I have done some vast studies on this exact topic in college and my brother actually wrote a psychological journal on this for Loyola University.
it's pretty easy. Men as well as women want what they cant have and want to change what is a challenge. It's the carnal instinct in all of us.
Best book to fully explain this topic is called "The Mating Mind" by Geoffrey Miller. I used to be a bad boy and never understood why. I tried to change myself to the "nice" guy as I felt like being the "bad boy" was not a good trait but ultimately if you are an alpha male it is instinctual to act as such.
I also own a bike and love my tats....weird0 -
is there not a saying about "nice guys coming 2nd" ????
Their girlfriends probably appreciate that....
.... just sayin'
FM !!!!!! hahahah
Yes we do appreciate that! The saying is "Nice guys finish last"!0 -
OK this is what I think. The "bad boy" types project an air of confidence and that can be pretty intoxicating. The irony is that sometimes they are deeply insecure and that's why they might mistreat women/seek to make themselves feel good by getting a lot of attention from a lot of women. That attention makes them seem more desirable, self assured, sexy etc.
A little bit of a viscous circle but something about that self assuredness is a big part of the sex appeal IMHO. Nothing like it.
This is also true. I will use this as an example. The richest men in the world you would assume are Alpha males but most of them are not. They have acted out in such a way to become the most successful they can be out of shear fear of being a failure. That also holds true for Bad Boys/Alpha Males, they act arrogant & cocky to cover up their own insecurities and some mask it well, VERY WELL.0 -
Cause it's the mystery of the unknown.... And I'm going to get in trouble for this but most girls like to be treated like crap. they like something to complain about they like the drama. Bottom line chicks are dumb sometimes.
What utter nonsense! :laugh:0 -
I used to like 'bad boys'... but it wasn't at all because I was attracted to the 'bad' aspect. 'Bad' boys typically are wonderful charmers. The kinds that say all the right things, do all the right things, pretend to be interested in everything you have to say until they have gotten all they want from you. Then you start to notice who they really are because they start to let their guard slip.
When it comes to picking men you know are bad, its probably because a lot of us women have the 'fix it' syndrome. We are convinced we can be the ones to change said man, when the truth is- They can only decide to change for themselves.
A lot of women grow out of it after being used or abused by some of these a-holes, some women are not as lucky. You need to pick a partner based on who they are right then, and not expect any major changes to happen. Its basically the same concept as if you are not attracted to brunettes, but you decide to date one hoping they will dye their hair blonde (although I don't know anyone who does this- because its STUPID-which is my point :P).
My boyfriend now is a total sweetheart. He would do anything for me and frankly is a complete dork. He loved me when I was thicker, he loves me now as I am getting thinner, and he would never stray. He appreciates and respects me, which is the most amazing quality in a man. I guess I just finally grew out of my 'need to fix' and found someone that was already pretty awesome
Basically, with a combination of maturity and some harsh life lessons, I think you will grow out of it. Men grow out of being jerks too, at least most of them. If I were you I would focus on YOURSELF right now. Don't worry about dating and allow yourself to mature and figure out what you want in a partner. Its hard not to acquire some baggage from 'bad boy-good girl' relationships, like trust issues etc, so if I were you stay away from men in general.
Also, a note to men- especially the nice guys:
NOT all women necessarily like 'bad' boys, but we also don't want you to be too introverted and awkward, either. Its truly difficult finding a balance where there is the right amount of bad (we like bad in areas such as the bedroom), and the right amount a good. We want someone who respects and appreciates us without losing qualities that make him manly. We don't want a push over and we crave the need to feel protected. Try to find your balance, because it is such a rare find... and biology usually wins us over when we pick the bad boy over the toooo good boy because the bad boy fills our biological needs- which history typically shows us biological needs win out almost all of the time over emotional needs. Try to be an emotional fulfiller and still be a man
Okay, enough said! 0 -
Not all guys who look like "bad boys" are bad boys. So it is always best to judge after you meet someone. I always like to keep a few around because they fit more my personality. But I have married a few good guys. So it looks like I just like Men!0
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is there not a saying about "nice guys coming 2nd" ????
Yes there is, it was created by bad boys who needed to pump themselves up. Being a nice guy, I finished first and always will. I know many nice guys that did so as well. However I know far more "bad guys" that have nothing to show for with either never being married or multiple marriages and/or a failed marriage. I deal with "bad boys" all of the time, guys with attitudes who think the world owes them something, that they are really tough. Trust me, these guys, they cry in cells more then any woman has.
A douche is a douche. A guy with confidence is not a bad guy, it is a guy confident. Cockiness however I find a little is good, too much is a douche ... and a douche is a douche.0 -
I used to like 'bad boys'... but it wasn't at all because I was attracted to the 'bad' aspect. 'Bad' boys typically are wonderful charmers. The kinds that say all the right things, do all the right things, pretend to be interested in everything you have to say until they have gotten all they want from you. Then you start to notice who they really are because they start to let their guard slip.
When it comes to picking men you know are bad, its probably because a lot of us women have the 'fix it' syndrome. We are convinced we can be the ones to change said man, when the truth is- They can only decide to change for themselves.
A lot of women grow out of it after being used or abused by some of these a-holes, some women are not as lucky. You need to pick a partner based on who they are right then, and not expect any major changes to happen. Its basically the same concept as if you are not attracted to brunettes, but you decide to date one hoping they will dye their hair blonde (although I don't know anyone who does this- because its STUPID-which is my point :P).
My boyfriend now is a total sweetheart. He would do anything for me and frankly is a complete dork. He loved me when I was thicker, he loves me now as I am getting thinner, and he would never stray. He appreciates and respects me, which is the most amazing quality in a man. I guess I just finally grew out of my 'need to fix' and found someone that was already pretty awesome Basically, with a combination of maturity and some harsh life lessons, I think you will grow out of it. Men grow out of being jerks too, at least most of them. If I were you I would focus on YOURSELF right now. Don't worry about dating and allow yourself to mature and figure out what you want in a partner. Its hard not to acquire some baggage from 'bad boy-good girl' relationships, like trust issues etc, so if I were you stay away from men in general.
Also, a note to men- especially the nice guys:
NOT all women necessarily like 'bad' boys, but we also don't want you to be too introverted and awkward, either. Its truly difficult finding a balance where there is the right amount of bad (we like bad in areas such as the bedroom), and the right amount a good. We want someone who respects and appreciates us without losing qualities that make him manly. We don't want a push over and we crave the need to feel protected. Try to find your balance, because it is such a rare find... and biology usually wins us over when we pick the bad boy over the toooo good boy because the bad boy fills our biological needs- which history typically shows us biological needs win out almost all of the time over emotional needs. Try to be an emotional fulfiller and still be a man Okay, enough said!
It pretty much has been proven that the womens subconcsious wants a Alpha male, a strong confident man, it has nothing really to do with changing the man as much as it does wanting a man that can be strong and protective, confident, a provider and a nurturer as well as a father that can provide you with children. Only in the last 30-40 years has the psychology shifted toward the idea of "changing or conquering the male and it's Alpha male ego or self worth"0 -
is there not a saying about "nice guys coming 2nd" ????
Yes there is, it was created by bad boys who needed to pump themselves up. Being a nice guy, I finished first and always will. I know many nice guys that did so as well. However I know far more "bad guys" that have nothing to show for with either never being married or multiple marriages and/or a failed marriage. I deal with "bad boys" all of the time, guys with attitudes who think the world owes them something, that they are really tough. Trust me, these guys, they cry in cells more then any woman has.
A douche is a douche. A guy with confidence is not a bad guy, it is a guy confident. Cockiness however I find a little is good, too much is a douche ... and a douche is a douche.
Couldnt have said it better myself. There is Cocky and there is Confident. Confident is the real Alpha male. Cocky is a show.0 -
is there not a saying about "nice guys coming 2nd" ????
Yes there is, it was created by bad boys who needed to pump themselves up. Being a nice guy, I finished first and always will. I know many nice guys that did so as well. However I know far more "bad guys" that have nothing to show for with either never being married or multiple marriages and/or a failed marriage. I deal with "bad boys" all of the time, guys with attitudes who think the world owes them something, that they are really tough. Trust me, these guys, they cry in cells more then any woman has.
A douche is a douche. A guy with confidence is not a bad guy, it is a guy confident. Cockiness however I find a little is good, too much is a douche ... and a douche is a douche.
Couldnt have said it better myself. There is Cocky and there is Confident. Confident is the real Alpha male. Cocky is a show.0 -
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Cause your stupid.
Women want to be that special woman that was able to tame the bad guy. That bad guy that would go from woman to woman and not feel a thing of for any of them but all of sudden can't keep their minds of you. Then when it doesn't work that way it frustrates you into what is wrong with you that he can't stop thinking of you when all you want to do is jump his bones as soon as he shows the slightest hint of interest. When it does work, that man is now broken and no longer out of your league.
Stupidity. :drinker:
I'm just talking out my rear. :drinker:0 -
the above hit the nail on the head exactly!0
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Interesting topic. I agree it's something almost instinctual that draws us to things which we can't have. I also agree that it's something about the confidence bad boys exude. I've dated nice guys and bad boys. Ironically enough, it was the last "nice guy" that I dated that cheated on me. I think the best thing is an edgy nice guy. Someone who has manners and isn't an *kitten*, but has a bit of a dark side...and hopefully a motorcycle.0
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Interesting topic. I agree it's something almost instinctual that draws us to things which we can't have. I also agree that it's something about the confidence bad boys exude. I've dated nice guys and bad boys. Ironically enough, it was the last "nice guy" that I dated that cheated on me. I think the best thing is an edgy nice guy. Someone who has manners and isn't an *kitten*, but has a bit of a dark side...and hopefully a motorcycle.
Pretty much what I like about women too not including the bike. I like nice edgy girls with a well hidden wild side that they are willing to share with me as I feel I am about the same but a little more wild and crazy.0 -
Need to learn to ride a motorcycle.0 -
We'll join the Black Widows Carl.
Sha na na na na na....
:laugh:0
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