girls who like bad boys.

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  • Chiquita_Banana
    Chiquita_Banana Posts: 500
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    i liked them when i was younger... had a lot of heartbreak... but i know the feeling now i know to steer clearrrr
  • 1FitMom326
    1FitMom326 Posts: 228
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    I think we all have different reasons for liking the bad boy. For me it is the confidence (not quite but treading on cockiness) that attracts me. They know who they are they are confident they can get it. I see myself a bit the same way. I like a challenge I don't want a push over. Maybe if I ever get married again I may fall for a good guy but until then the bad ones are a lot of fun.
  • Imsojen
    Imsojen Posts: 192 Member
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    I have spent much time working on this bad boy issue.. For me I decided it was what looks good to me, attraction, I have tattooes/ love em, but also on a more important point I think that somewhere deep down I know this bad boy is temporary, I dont need to let my guard down and let him have anything real about me cuz he doesnt care. I can have the sexy bad boy and not risk him hurting ME. But that gets old... I want to be open and free but obviously Baddie doesnt deserve that.. Im totally a work in progress but the previous advice about finding a nice guy is where im at now.
  • elleninez
    elleninez Posts: 44
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    Are you attracted to the good guys at all?
    Yes, I am attracted to the good guys. I actually dated a couple...unfortunately, they were at periods in their lives when they didn't want a "serious" relationship, and I did.
  • acave9406
    acave9406 Posts: 124 Member
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    What if you have the best of both worlds?
    I love guys who are good guys but you would never know by looking at them. I love tattoos, piercings, guys who will get down n dirty working on a car and not just any car i'm talking like old muscle cars.
  • decu68
    decu68 Posts: 78
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    I think we all have different reasons for liking the bad boy. For me it is the confidence (not quite but treading on cockiness) that attracts me. They know who they are they are confident they can get it. I see myself a bit the same way. I like a challenge I don't want a push over. Maybe if I ever get married again I may fall for a good guy but until then the bad ones are a lot of fun.

    Those are not necessarily bad boy traits; being confident or slightly cocky. I definitely have those traits; big time and I consider myself a good guy. HOWEVER I did not get that confidence or cockiness until I started weight lifting and getting results, and that only increased when doing martial arts. And perhaps some from being involved in policing. So perhaps when younger I was the nice guy but now I'm the "better" guy.
  • nirsky
    nirsky Posts: 38 Member
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    Crap, and I just sold my motorcycle.
  • fteale
    fteale Posts: 5,310 Member
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    I seriously don't understand the attraction to big, bald, tattooed guys with motorbikes. Not a bit. I wouldn't look twice at someone like that, in fact, I'd cross the road to avoid them (yes, I am judgemental). They might be nice people inside, but I am put off by external projection of violence.

    I like a man I can converse with as an equal, who is clean, and can answer my endless random physics questions, and who lets me be me without questioning or trying to change me.

    You just basically just singled me out LOL :flowerforyou:

    Oh sorry. Didn't mean to offend. Looking at your avatar pic you don't look like the type I am talking about. Unless you walk around in leathers and have bad skull pictures tattooed all over your back.
    And smoke. Smoking is a BIG turn off.
  • decu68
    decu68 Posts: 78
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    QUOTED BY NIRSKY:

    Crap, and I just sold my motorcycle.

    Say it isn't so. That is one thing I will never get rid of, my motorcycle. There is a certain feeling being out in the open with that much power between your legs. It can be euphoric.
  • Improvised
    Improvised Posts: 925 Member
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    Ugh, I can't stand bad boys. I'm married to a really nice guy, and couldn't be happier.
  • joamarelo
    joamarelo Posts: 161
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    you are so right! :( WHY DO I PICK THE BAD ONES!??
  • JoyceJoanne
    JoyceJoanne Posts: 760 Member
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    I do want to add that tattoos and Harleys don't make for bad guys. I'd much rather be stuck in a bar full of Harley dudes than a bar full of men in suits. At least with the Harley guys you know EXACTLY who they are. You never know what lurks under that suit. :noway:

    I agree. Although, I could hold my own in either situation.

    I think it is natures way of getting us to reproduce and repopulate the planet. In the wild, the strong survive. We obviously want our offspring to be strong and survive. Bad boys generally have more testosterone making them appear stronger and more likely to reproduce. We see the good guys as weak, therefore not the best to reproduce with because their offspring could also be weak. Unfortunately, even though our brains are more developed and CAPABALE of seeing through this we very often don't.

    That being said, I know LOTS of 'bad boys' that are really terrific guys, and many 'good guys' that are super creeps. Not all people fit into the typical stereotypes- but there are stereotypes for a reason....
  • b00b0084
    b00b0084 Posts: 729 Member
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    :flowerforyou:
    Cant call without a number anubis :ohwell:

    My number is 609. Shh...don't tell anyone. :love:
    our little secret :happy:
  • JoyceJoanne
    JoyceJoanne Posts: 760 Member
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    bad boys let it be known from the jump that they are ginormous douche canoes!

    OMG this made me laugh out loud!!! I LOOOVE this. This is going to be my new 'go to' saying. Thanks chick!
  • JoyceJoanne
    JoyceJoanne Posts: 760 Member
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    I seriously don't understand the attraction to big, bald, tattooed guys with motorbikes. Not a bit. I wouldn't look twice at someone like that, in fact, I'd cross the road to avoid them (yes, I am judgemental). They might be nice people inside, but I am put off by external projection of violence.

    I like a man I can converse with as an equal, who is clean, and can answer my endless random physics questions, and who lets me be me without questioning or trying to change me.

    It's one of those things.... "If I have to explain to to you, you just wont understand."

    BTW, I know several 'bad boys' that are PhDs (some of them have more than one) and could talk circles around anyone without being pompous, have a great sense of humor, common sense, full of 'useless trivia', are advocates against violence and very genuine men.

    Never judge a book by it's cover. This goes for ALL types of people. The bad boys, nice guys, girl next door or the tramp... everyone has something to offer. (Haven't you watched "The Breakfast Club"?! :wink:

    Hopefully you surround yourself with people that you can trust and that you care about. In my life I have all kinds. My question about the people I surround myself with is this: "Would I trust you with holding the end of my rope if I was hanging off a cliff?" If that answer is no, I don't waste my time on you. Life is way too short to live with people that you can't trust fully.... or call at 4am to bail you out of jail...just sayin'. :bigsmile: My friends are the family that I have CHOSEN, why would I choose an idiot? I have plenty of them in the family I had no say in.
  • JoyceJoanne
    JoyceJoanne Posts: 760 Member
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    QUOTED BY NIRSKY:

    Crap, and I just sold my motorcycle.

    Say it isn't so. That is one thing I will never get rid of, my motorcycle. There is a certain feeling being out in the open with that much power between your legs. It can be euphoric.

    THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!

    *sorry, couldn't resist* :bigsmile: I'll get off the thread now....
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    To the fathers who have posted on this thread, I can attest, as a young woman with a very protective father of my own, to the fact that how you are raising your daughters will have a tremendous impact on what kind of men they end up with. When my sister and I were growing up, my dad did and said some things that were pretty mortifying to us at the time.

    For instance, if a man or even a teenage boy cursed in front of us, my dad would pull him aside and politely ask him to refrain from speaking that way in front of his daughters. It wasn't until I became an adult that I understood what he was trying to do ... he was teaching me a lesson about how I should expect to be treated.

    When I was 13, he took me to lunch one day, just the two of us. He did all the things a gentleman should do for a lady (opening doors, pulling out chairs, etc.), and he said "Never date or marry a man who wouldn't treat you the way I would treat you." And that has stuck with me ever since. I am so thankful to have had such a good example in my life (along with my older brother) of what men are supposed to be. It has saved me a lot of trouble. So keep up the good work. If your daughters don't understand or appreciate it now, they will someday.
  • lilac01
    lilac01 Posts: 180 Member
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    Bad boys are just thrilling to be with.
  • LeeKetty1176
    LeeKetty1176 Posts: 881 Member
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    is there not a saying about "nice guys coming 2nd" ????
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    As to the question about why girls like bad boys, I think there is a small biological component to it (i.e. being attracted to testosterone overload), but I think it mostly stems from two things: wanting to be the woman who saves someone from self-destruction or simply not thinking you deserve a good guy.

    I have never dated a "bad boy," but I confess I went through a time in my life when I thought it might feel good to be the one who straightened out a bad boy. I think it's because women are nurturers, and we want to feel needed. Luckily, that was a quick phase, and I have no lingering, romantic delusions about trying to save someone from himself.

    I actually think there is less mystery involved with being with a bad boy. You know there is a 99% chance he is going to hurt you or just leave you totally unfulfilled because you are never enough for him. But knowing how that story ends is easier than taking a leap of faith with a good guy because if a good guy decides to move on, it can be pretty soul-crushing.

    Personally, I'm not interested in men who aren't interested in me and don't value what I have to offer. A man who asks me out properly, opens doors for me, makes sure I get home safely at the end of the night, etc., is a thousand times sexier and more masculine in my eyes than a man who thinks he's too much of a badass to worry about being a gentleman. That tells me that he cares way more about himself and his image than he'll ever care about me.

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