Magnificent Mamas (Closed Group)

AnneElise

Thanks for the thoughts on mother/daughter pregnancy and labor. I think I am hoping my labors are like my mom’s although my pregnancy has been the opposite haha. Her labors were very short. My sister who has the same exact build as me went in for her 40 week apt and was 7 cm dilated…. Later that day when she went to the hospital she was 8… and still took her 7 hours to get from 8 to 10 (natural birth).

Soon2Bfitmamaof3

Brittony- I will definitely make sure that my boys never feel the need to put me before their SO’s. He has gotten better over the years but it’s still not where it needs to be. He would rather have an argument with me than hurt her. Actually I don’t remember if I shared this but when I had Brooklynn and was being put in my room for the night he was in the hall way talking to her and telling her to calm down. Apparently she did not get the text that I was in labor and was upset that she found out about the baby from his brother.

Ron- I sure hope he snaps out of it, I can’t do this song and dance anymore.
Anne-Fingers crossed for the big $

Danielle- Thanks! I sure hope we can get that cord cut once and for all

We had a very long serious talk yesterday and tons of text messages all day long. It seems like I got through to him because he kept sending her calls to voice mail yesterday after I got home and boy oh boy was she blowing up his phone. He says that he could not live without "the love of his life" or his children. He is making a big effort so hopefully he will stick to it. I just don't understand how a mother could be so pushy in her sons life and cause so many marital problems. 90% of our arguments have been about her and her need to be the center of his universe. I basically told him I am pretty sure I can get through 18 more years until the kids are up and out but if he wants to have a marriage beyond that then he really needs to make some serious changes.

jamielangner

Sheri - Sorry to hear about DH. He definitely needs to make his own family his priority now and he sounds like he is making an effort so let's hope he sticks to it!

Anne - I'll be hoping that you guys get that deal, that would be great!

Annabelle - Thanks so much! I'll be running out to the health food store to pick that stuff up asap!

AFM: I do ask DH to be more involved but he takes it defensively and usually gets an attitude about it. Like he doesn't want me telling him how to be a dad or something. I really don't think he actually listens to anything I have to say anymore. I'm just waiting for one of his friends to get through to him how important it is that he be involved in their lives but who knows when or if that will happen. He always says to me stuff like, there are a lot worse dads out there, and my thought is just like, you want to compare yourself to people like that?

LittleSpy

Anne -- I can't blame you for wanting that kind of labor to be genetic! :laugh: I keep secretly (or, I guess not so secretly now) hoping I'm going to go to my appointment tomorrow and find out I'm close to 100% effaced and 3-4 cm dilated now. :laugh: I'm pretty positive I won't be getting that kind of news, but wouldn't it be lovely to skip 8-10 hours of early labor? I've been in constant false labor for nearly 4 weeks now and my contractions have been way stronger the last couple of days; I should get SOMETHING out of it! Fingers crossed those folks buy the house!!

Sheri -- I'm sorry your hubby can't get his priorities in order. Your MIL sounds a lot like my own mother who, just until this past Sunday, was being extremely overdramatic and childish about our labor/delivery/postpartum wishes. My SIL never got along with her very well and I have to say I completely understand why. I'm so glad to read it seems like he's starting to get it now.

Jamie -- I hope FOB grows up super fast and realizes what he's missing. Your girls are so blessed to have such a wonderful mom who cares so much.

As for me, I'm just trying my best to hang on and keep working full-time. To be honest, I'm pretty miserable coming to work every day at this point. I'd like to stay at home so that I could get as much as possible in order and keep things clean without exhausting myself. It seems like most women go into labor right as they reach their breaking point. I'm hoping that happens but I have a feeling my breaking point will be before my due date. :laugh: At least this weekend is a 3 day weekend!

Mamatoabunch

Sheri - Sorry to hear about DH. He definitely needs to make his own family his priority now and he sounds like he is making an effort so let's hope he sticks to it!

Anne - I'll be hoping that you guys get that deal, that would be great!

Annabelle - Thanks so much! I'll be running out to the health food store to pick that stuff up asap!

AFM: I do ask DH to be more involved but he takes it defensively and usually gets an attitude about it. Like he doesn't want me telling him how to be a dad or something. I really don't think he actually listens to anything I have to say anymore. I'm just waiting for one of his friends to get through to him how important it is that he be involved in their lives but who knows when or if that will happen. He always says to me stuff like, there are a lot worse dads out there, and my thought is just like, you want to compare yourself to people like that?

You can ask for gentian violet at the pharmacy, it is w/o prescription. Sometimes they have it at Walmart in the obscure part of the health and beauty section.

Mamatoabunch

Annabelle- I love your photo- the kids are so cute!

Thank you!

As to pregnancy and labors comparison to our mom's. My mom had less ms than I, we both had easy pregnancies, although my mom had complete placenta previa w/ her last baby. Not sure about labors honestly, since comparing would be moot. I had all my singles at home, so that changes things in comparison to my mom birthing in the hospital.

Soon2Bfitmamaof3

AFM: I do ask DH to be more involved but he takes it defensively and usually gets an attitude about it. Like he doesn't want me telling him how to be a dad or something. I really don't think he actually listens to anything I have to say anymore. I'm just waiting for one of his friends to get through to him how important it is that he be involved in their lives but who knows when or if that will happen. He always says to me stuff like, there are a lot worse dads out there, and my thought is just like, you want to compare yourself to people like that?

I hope he realizes and turns around quickly, you are so strong and an amazing mom.

Sheri -- I'm sorry your hubby can't get his priorities in order. Your MIL sounds a lot like my own mother who, just until this past Sunday, was being extremely overdramatic and childish about our labor/delivery/postpartum wishes. My SIL never got along with her very well and I have to say I completely understand why. I'm so glad to read it seems like he's starting to get it now.

As for me, I'm just trying my best to hang on and keep working full-time. To be honest, I'm pretty miserable coming to work every day at this point. I'd like to stay at home so that I could get as much as possible in order and keep things clean without exhausting myself. It seems like most women go into labor right as they reach their breaking point. I'm hoping that happens but I have a feeling my breaking point will be before my due date. :laugh: At least this weekend is a 3 day weekend!

Glad that you know how to handle her and put her at bay, my 3 BILs live their lives normally and do not take anything she says/does with a grain of salt. She always cries to him and throws a fit and he will play on my soft spot, no more. My oldest BIL is in the midst of divorce, his wife couldn't stand their whole family and would skip all family functions (except bbqs at our house without the rest of the family)

I don't think you'll be checked this appointment, for some reason they check you at 36 and not again until 38. Dont be upset if they do and there is no change because your progress is amazing! Yay for 3 days off, I am looking forward to that

ron2282

Anne – fingers crossed for your hubby! That would be a nice addition to savings!

Sheri – I hope he’s able to sick to what he says. At least he was able to see that there’s a problem and is willing to try to fix it.

Jamie – I hope FOB gets some sense knocked into him soon!

Julie – yea for a three day weekend! I totally forgot I’m off Monday too!!! :bigsmile:

Kathryn is crazy active in the mornings now, to the point where I don’t want to get out of bed. I just want to lay there and feel her move. As much as I love laying in bed longer each morning, I’m not enjoying having to work until 5 o’clock to get a full day in. :ohwell:

Rachickidee

Julie, I understand with the work thing. I really hate getting up and coming to work now. Especially today, I just feel crappy. I am super queasy for some reason. I feel like I am behind when I read about all of your contractions. I seriously don't get them much at all. I get crampy and I get back pains, but not consistantly. And usually one or the other lasts for 30+ min and then goes away all together. I have a dr. apt. today at 6:15 pm, I am very curious to see if I have progressed.

LynnW52

HO - LEE CRAAAAAP!!!! I miss you guys SOOO much!!!! Still no internet at home :grumble: Something is going on with the wireless network in our area and we just can't figure it out. I didn't really want to go to work and use the computer since I'd more than likely get bombarded with work crap - and then I remembered - the library!!! So here I sit :happy: This is my first time out by myself without Joshua, he is at home with Dad. It's so weird, I feel like I'm forgetting something :laugh:

Joshua is doing great, he is now 10lbs 12 oz, he's a great eater, just like mom :laugh: He is 3 weeks old today. I can't believe how fast the time goes by, I know it's such a cliche thing to say but it is so true. If feels like it's been forever since I was pregnant and had him.

Everything has been going really well. We've been relaxing and enjoying each other's company. My mom came down a couple days ago and hubby and I went out to dinner while she stayed with the baby - what a huge step that was! I'll admit, I shed a tear when we left. I'm so much more of a "momma bear" than I ever thought I would be. Just love that little man to pieces!!

I've read everything but can't for the life of me respond to everyone, and I'm sorry :ohwell: That is the only part of going back to work that I'm looking forward to, being able to stay in better contact with all of you!

Carina - I am so sorry about your situation and I'm glad that he is willing to go to counseling. He better thank God every night that you are giving him another chance. You are a beautiful woman inside and out - know that I'm thinking of you.

Sheri - Your June photo looks great!! Keep up the good work sexy mama! Hoping that your hubby realizes once and for all that his mom is sabotaging (sp?) his marriage and family and he works to fix it before it's too late. He'd be a fool not to!

Jamie - Your girls are very lucky to have such an awesome mom, hopefully FOB comes around before it's too late.

As far as family planning - I was on the pill for the last 7 years, we used condoms for the first month together before I went on the patch. They took me off the patch because of high blood pressure and moved me to the pill. At my 6 week checkup I'm gonna go on the mini pill and we'll use the "pull out" method too. Neither one of us want to use condoms, it'd be really crazy after all these years!

Hm...I can't think of anything else that was talked about at the moment. I'm so excited for the next round of babies!! Love all of your new bump pictures! Hope all is well and again, so sorry I'm been MIA, bums me right out!!!!

Miss you all and I'll be back on as soon as I can!! Take care!! :happy:

LynnW52

Brittony - I'd be happy to share some of my c-section experience with you, anything to help!

I'll start with a shopping list for you:

Liquid Dial Gold Antibacterial soap
Viva papertowel
Hair Blowdryer (if you don't already have one)
Milk of Magnesia
Gas X
Prune Juice
High Rise underwear (super sexy ones :laugh: )

If your body ends up being anything like mine, your stomach will sorta deflate like a balloon, and it will create a flap that hangs over your incision. It is hard to keep the incision clean and dry because it's skin to skin contact, but you wanna do the best you can, this is where the dial soap comes in. While your staples are still in, you'll wanna lather up your belly right above your incision with the soap and just let it run onto the incision, don't scrub/wash the actual area. Then let water run over it and rinse it all off. When you get out of the shower, you'll want to use your blowdryer to dry your incision. Keeping it dry is very important to it healing, so you'll want to blowdry it maybe 3 times a day. After I blowdried it I took a sheet of the viva papertowel (really soft and doesn't leave fuzzies) and sat it on the incision to soak up any remaining water and to make sure there wasn't any drainage.

The high rise underwear you'll want because you won't want ones that will be resting on your incision or even a little higher. Even the skin right above my incision was a little tender so the higher the underwear the more comfortable it was.

Now for everything else....when you're in the hospital they'll be asking you if you've farted yet, then they'll want a bowel movement. Surgery causes your GI tract to slow down and so do the pain medications that they give you. These 2 things along with the air that gets trapped in there when they do the surgery can cause some major complications. I didn't eat anything for 2 days straight so I never did go #2 at the hospital, but I did the day I got home. Everything was fine for a couple days and then BAM - HOLY painful!! :frown: I was backed up like traffic on the e-way after a semi-rollover. It was sooo extremely painful! First I tried the Gas X cause I thought it was gas, then I tried the milk of mag. I was having really bad diarhea and really bad left sided pain. It ended up that I had a bowel obstruction that was allowing loose stool to pass by it (and it was extremely painful when it did) but it wouldn't budge. I ate only soft foods for 3 days straight, drank a ton of water, took stool softeners, and still nothing. I ended up giving myself an enema :frown: and that finally got things moving. I would have those things on hand just in case, it is better to have them and not need them, than need them and not have them. I would suggest drinking a small glass of warm prune juice just to keep things moving and resorting to the others if you end up having trouble. Try to walk around in the hospital as much as you can and this will get your GI moving again too.

Getting your staples out doesn't exactly hurt, but it isn't exactly pleasant either :ohwell: Make sure you take your pain medication an hour before your appointment to have them taken out, this will help a lot!!

Make sure you tell hubby if there are any specific pictures that you want taken right after Emma is born. For instance, I wanted the picture of Josh on the scale so that youcould see how much he weighed in the picture, and I wanted a picture of them bringing him and showing him to me the first time. Thankfully myhubby just took pictures of everything :laugh: but if there is something specific you want be sure to tell him. Also make sure to tell the nurses just to pat her down and not bathe her if that is what you want, and tell them you want her brought to you in recovery immediately to breastfeed. This will help to form that bond and get her nursing successfully.

It can be a little bit overwhelming laying on that table awake and unable to feel the lower part of your body, but whatever you do don't panic! Otherwise they will knock your *kitten* out real quick. It is a sterile environment and if they think for one second that you're going to start flailing around and contaminating anything, they'll put you out and your recovery time will turn into like 5 hours and that's the first 5 hours of your daughters life that you'll never get back. Take deep breaths and stay calm.

Oh, and the hospital should give you a support band and it does help to hold things in place, especially in the car on the way home. And it doubles as a ghetto belly band lol.

This is all that I can think of right now, hope it helps!!

Ah... I'm so excited for you!!! Don't worry, everything will be fine. Can't wait to hear all about it and see pictures of sweet baby Emma!! Since I probably won't be on again before the 1st, good luck!!! I'll be praying for you!!

LynnW52

One more quick question - Josh has started spitting up more in the last couple days - any ideas why? Or is this normal?

Not projectile, just "urping", but it has definitely increased. He doesn't seem to have an upset belly or anything, but just thought I'd see if any of the other BF babies spitup too.

Thank you in advance!!

dragonfly74

One more quick question - Josh has started spitting up more in the last couple days - any ideas why? Or is this normal?

Not projectile, just "urping", but it has definitely increased. He doesn't seem to have an upset belly or anything, but just thought I'd see if any of the other BF babies spitup too.

Thank you in advance!!

Lynn ~ great to hear from you! Glad you are doing so well! As for spit up it might be because he is getting a little more air when nursing. Maybe just burp him a little more often during his feeding. Wade doesn't spit up really at all but my first one sure did once she hit a few weeks old. So I believe it sometimes depends on the child.

dragonfly74

Now for everything else....when you're in the hospital they'll be asking you if you've farted yet, then they'll want a bowel movement.

Just wanted to share with the upcoming mommas, they ask you this as well even if it was a natural delivery and not a c/s.

dragonfly74

Sheri ~ sure have been thinking of you. Hopefully things continue to look up.

My MIL is great (so is my FIL) they live about a mile away. My husband loves her dearly (as do I) and I always saw the way he treated her and respected her. My husband and I have known each other since 1st and 2 nd grade. I knew if he treated his mom with respect and love he would do the same with me, and he has. Now that I have my boys I am hoping I am not going to be "one of those" moms that hangs onto them too tightly. And my future DIL won't be bashing me on a board (or whatever they have 20 + years out :laugh: )

Sounds like you have quite a different situation than I do. My MIL has 3 boys and her youngest is a girl. Her boys all are so close to her (as is her daughter). But she definitely doesn't interfere with our home life. And after reading your post the other day I made sure to thank her. She responded that she told herself she would never impose her opinion or anything unless asked.

I always make sure my husband is with her on Mother's Day because she is so wonderful to us all. And as my grandfather always said to my grandma "you aren't my mother." My kids honor me and my husband is to honor his mom on that day. He of course spends time with me too, but I am so grateful to her for giving me such a wonderful man (and he definitely takes after his mom).

Hope all goes well from here on out for you and your hubby. I need to realize how fortunate I am.

dragonfly74

Anne ~ sorry this is so late. My mom didn't realize she was in labor with me (thought she ate too much chocolate). She was told she was due in September (I came August 8th). A neighbor lady who was a nurse told her she needed to get to the hospital and she had me 15 minutes later. I too have had fast labors with all four of mine.

However, she was induced with my brother (he was her second, I was first) and that labor was longer. Her pregnancies were not good though (spotting and such) and mine have been amazing and I have never had ONE issue. She calls me her miracle baby because the doctors gave her a "shot" to start her period when she was newly pregnant with me (she had no idea because the tests didn't show it).

So her labor with me was quite a bit like my labor with my children in terms of being quick. Lucky me!

Soon2Bfitmamaof3

One more quick question - Josh has started spitting up more in the last couple days - any ideas why? Or is this normal?

Not projectile, just "urping", but it has definitely increased. He doesn't seem to have an upset belly or anything, but just thought I'd see if any of the other BF babies spitup too.

Thank you in advance!!

Not sure why but Brooklynn does it all of the time too . I am curious as to the answer as well. I've been thinking about you guys and was hoping to hear from you soon. How did the whole aid thing work out? So glad you got to have a nice dinner with hubby.

Sheri ~ sure have been thinking of you. Hopefully things continue to look up.

My MIL is great (so is my FIL) they live about a mile away. My husband loves her dearly (as do I) and I always saw the way he treated her and respected her. My husband and I have known each other since 1st and 2 nd grade. I knew if he treated his mom with respect and love he would do the same with me, and he has. Now that I have my boys I am hoping I am not going to be "one of those" moms that hangs onto them too tightly. And my future DIL won't be bashing me on a board (or whatever they have 20 + years out :laugh: )

Sounds like you have quite a different situation than I do. My MIL has 3 boys and her youngest is a girl. Her boys all are so close to her (as is her daughter). But she definitely doesn't interfere with our home life. And after reading your post the other day I made sure to thank her. She responded that she told herself she would never impose her opinion or anything unless asked.

I always make sure my husband is with her on Mother's Day because she is so wonderful to us all. And as my grandfather always said to my grandma "you aren't my mother." My kids honor me and my husband is to honor his mom on that day. He of course spends time with me too, but I am so grateful to her for giving me such a wonderful man (and he definitely takes after his mom).

Hope all goes well from here on out for you and your hubby. I need to realize how fortunate I am.

I will definately not be "one of those" moms, I really wouldn't mind sharing all holidays if things weren't so one sided and if things were decided upon and not demanded. She does have many great qualities but big time "poor me" syndrome :laugh: I am definately learning a lot from her. How not to be with my children's futue SOs. We've made it through much more over the years so I am certain we can do this, he just has to hold up his end.

joonzgurl

Lynn it is great to see you back! Glad to hear you guys are doing well!

Ladies - have any of you had really large fundal measurements through pregnancy? Mine has been large pretty much all along (always measuring a bit ahead) but today I measured at 41, and I am only 33.5 weeks. Last time, at 31.5 weeks, I measured at 35. So it has increased by 6cm in 2 weeks (less 2 days)!!! Oh, and I only gained 1lb in those 2 weeks.

My ultrasound (last one at 24 weeks) shows bone development/etc in line with my dates. My dr thinks that the baby is going to be really really large. Anyone else ever had this before? I don't have gestational diabetes or anything. She of course mentioned sometimes they offer a c-section, but said that they will always let us try to labour on our own for a suspected large baby, and also because I am a big girl, she said that it is more likely that I won't have much of a problem (they really only worry when they think skinny mini's will have a big baby). So that made me feel better but it still kind of freaks me out.

It also makes me feel bad about myself in a way, because if I have a huge like, 10 pounder or something everyone around here will think it is because I am fat and just stuffed myself full of junk through pregnancy, which I really haven't...I swear!

AnneElise

Sheri- I hope that this works for him to start taking steps to fixing the problem! You deserve that!

Jamie- you are right, why would he want to compare himself to horrible dads? Sigh

Julie- You are doing so great at work! I can imagine it is hard to keep going!

Ron- Mine is so active at night it is keeping me up!

Rachael- How did your apt go?

Lynn- We miss you too! So glad to hear from you and that things are going well! Keep us as updated as possible!

Bethe- Thanks for sharin… it seems hit or miss if it is like mom’s or not

Rachel- I said this on the other board but mine have been small and off based on the US. Are you getting another US? You could ask for one to see.

Hi anyone I missed!

Rachickidee

Blah... kind of depressed now. I had another dr. appointment today. Not anymore dilated than last time... she said she could hardly get a finger tip in. My bp was higher than normal. Now, apparently my baby is measuring too small so I am supposed to rest as much as I can... (hard to do when I can't ever sleep at night), and my dr. is predicting that I will go over my due date. I didn't expect her too early, but I am super anxious, and I am tired and uncomfortable, and I just can't imagine going longer than expected. My hormones have kicked in and I am fighting the urge to not cry. lol It sucks to because hubby is at work tonight so I am all alone. I really need to buy groceries, but I am too tired to do anything. Sorry, pity party for Rachael right now.