Things that make a woman instantly hotter
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It doesn't have to be one or the other. I just think most women don't understand that a man needs to hear that the woman in his life finds him strong and handsome and sexy .. that she thinks of him as a good provider, a good father, etc. A man who doesn't feel like he embodies those things doesn't really feel like a man. It's not "*kitten*-kissing" ... it's just being honest and forthcoming with your feelings. Just tell him how you feel about him as a man, as a husband, as a father. That's it. And I think most women would be surprised at the things their men would say and do for them if they could stop seeing the vocalizing of feelings as "*kitten*-kissing" or "ego-stroking."
After 34 years of marriage, my mom still randomly tells my dad what a great provider he is. And she does it in front of other people. My dad would walk through fire to make her happy.
Walk through fire is an understatement.
When a real man's wife is mentally, emotionally, and physically appreciative...walking through fire wouldn't even give him pause.
Do me a favor, and send your Mother a thank you note along with a happy birthday from me today. She deserves the recognition for raising you right.0 -
Do me a favor, and send your Mother a thank you note along with a happy birthday from me today. She deserves the recognition for raising you right.
You a such a good man. Seriously.0 -
Do me a favor, and send your Mother a thank you note along with a happy birthday from me today. She deserves the recognition for raising you right.
Yeah, I lucked out. My parents are incredible.0 -
Do me a favor, and send your Mother a thank you note along with a happy birthday from me today. She deserves the recognition for raising you right.
You a such a good man. Seriously.
Thank you Belle...but in the end, it goes along with what I said...its not me that's particularly special. It's what's brought out by being recognized and appreciated by a good woman.
That's all it takes folks.0 -
Do me a favor, and send your Mother a thank you note along with a happy birthday from me today. She deserves the recognition for raising you right.
You a such a good man. Seriously.
I concur.0 -
It doesn't have to be one or the other. I just think most women don't understand that a man needs to hear that the woman in his life finds him strong and handsome and sexy .. that she thinks of him as a good provider, a good father, etc. A man who doesn't feel like he embodies those things doesn't really feel like a man. It's not "*kitten*-kissing" ... it's just being honest and forthcoming with your feelings. Just tell him how you feel about him as a man, as a husband, as a father. That's it. And I think most women would be surprised at the things their men would say and do for them if they could stop seeing the vocalizing of feelings as "*kitten*-kissing" or "ego-stroking."
After 34 years of marriage, my mom still randomly tells my dad what a great provider he is. And she does it in front of other people. My dad would walk through fire to make her happy.
Sorry - was gonna stay off the threads but thought I'd have a browse before signing off.
I have to comment on this - I've been with my partner for 14/15 years with a couple of splits throughout that time. I constantly told him that he looked great how he was, that he was a good father and that worked hard and that I was proud of him - to no avail on some occasions. I personally think its more than that. In a relationship you have to be totally honest and have regular heart to hearts and declare how you're feeling otherwise the other person won't get why you're acting a certain way. My parnter is absolutely great - I'm the first to admit he's been downright horrible towards me during certain phases of our time together - and you know what - that was because we were not working as a team and spoke the truth.
We got back together recently after a month split whereby I went off and lived on my own, leaving my son with him (still saw him everyday and did the mum thing),. My partner asked to get back together and you know what - I actually told him the truth - I wasn't sure that I could do it after so many ups and down previously - that it wasn't fair on our son. He was completely shocked by this - but my feelings had diminished because whilst being on my own, I put more time into myself, my weight, my looks, my emotional wellbeing and found that I was actually happier on my own instead of putting up with negative comments such as, your pathetic, you're a failure, you can't do anything - YES I FLAMIN WELL CAN - I'm the opposite of all those negative comments you were putting on me EVERY DAY......this was because of our lifestyle, stress and NOT SPEAKING THE TRUTH to one another......That I finally realised recently. After my revelation to him, he was completely honest with me - in saying that he has never been against me, never hated me etc etc - and that was said totally without prompting out of the blue one night. This has to be the most honest thing he has ever said to me as already knew what he had said - he just hadn't listened and looked at what was going on at the time. I find honesty and admitting there's a problem to be attractive in a man - it shows he does actually care and that he's in tune with his emotions (most of the time).
The whole point being here is that since all the talking and honest communication - things have dramatically improved. We both smile everyday, compliment eachother everyday, talk to eachother if something is bothering us, however small such as the way something was said and how it was interpreted. It feels now, like it was way back when we first met which were the happier times.
Deep down my partner is an absolutely great person, caring, kind, generous, not selfish, very hard working, tolerant (more than I realised before), patient, a great dad and tries to please everyone - friends, family, associates - even if it makes his life harder in the long run. He hates letting people down. Unfortunately, the one person he shouldn't have let down was me during the hard times - but I should never have let him down either - it works both ways. As a result of our honesty and re-evaluation of EVERYTHING, we seem to be more attracted to one another now - I do love him - always will, just lost that for a while when he disrespected me - but then the same happened with him as far as I was concerned.
This is the very thing that I think makes a woman - or even a man - instantly hotter / more attractive......the fact that we can be honest and talk things through and most importantly ADMIT when we have been in the wrong and ACTUALLY make an effort - as a team - to work those problems through. Attraction can be based on looks but OVERALL its a persons character and the qualities that they hold that attract us. Forgiveness can be a wonderful thing sometimes.
Again, during that month break from my partner, I joined MFP and admit, was a little flirtacious - in part because of certain peoples looks - but ACTUALLY it was based on their personality / qualities and how supportive and patient they were towards me. and even then it was purely because I once had those in a partner but missed them, nevermind the fact that I was having a little fun after so much negativety. But again, whether you're in a relationship or single, can you not have a little flirtacious fun! - Certainly gained my self esteem and confidence back as a result of some very supportive friends who understood my situation and did not return the flirtaciousness either. Were just there to lend an ear when I needed them. Thank you to you ALL.
Finally - apologies if this post is too long.0 -
I was actually happier on my own instead of putting up with negative comments such as, your pathetic, you're a failure, you can't do anything
My opinion is that any man who tells you that doesn't respect you and maybe doesn't even really love you. It doesn't matter what you did or how upset he is; there is simply no excuse for that kind of emotional abuse. Praise and compliments and appreciative gestures are meaningless when given to people who are messed up enough in the head to talk to someone they allegedly love in that manner.
So of course there is more to a successful relationship (especially a marriage) than showing each other constant attention and appreciation. If none of it is genuine (i.e. backed up by mutual love and respect), then it's not going to do any good.0 -
I concur.
That is all!0 -
COLTS ALL THE WAY!!!!Full knowledge of NFL football and rules.
I'm your woman! But, I'm gay. btw, I'm not feeling the new kickoff rule.
GAH! NO! :noway: Texans fan here. :bigsmile: (Plus Saints, Bears, Patriots, and Broncos)0 -
ok... weighing in...
for me...
if you can recite dork things...
drink dark beer.
know how to fry oreos...
enjoy sex...
and have a pulse... i think that instantly makes you hotter...0 -
I was actually happier on my own instead of putting up with negative comments such as, your pathetic, you're a failure, you can't do anything
My opinion is that any man who tells you that doesn't respect you and maybe doesn't even really love you. It doesn't matter what you did or how upset he is; there is simply no excuse for that kind of emotional abuse. Praise and compliments and appreciative gestures are meaningless when given to people who are messed up enough in the head to talk to someone they allegedly love in that manner.
So of course there is more to a successful relationship (especially a marriage) than showing each other constant attention and appreciation. If none of it is genuine (i.e. backed up by mutual love and respect), then it's not going to do any good.
Along with cris's comments and previous valuable support - are you both trying to say that perhaps I made the wrong choice in getting back with my boyfriend / partner? I understand totally of where you are coming from.....so far it's only been two weeks that i've been back with him - just seeing how it goes - part of me is waiting for things to go back to the negative. Part of the problem we have is that I sometimes don't communicate very well - mainly when he's stressed and grumpy - I find it hard to approach him - and i told him this recently, which we are working on at the moment. I dunno - maybe I should have stayed on my own longer or permanently - just feel I can't give up on someone who deep down is a great guy that I've been with for so many years through some really hard times. When I'm with someone - I commit to the bitter end. I've spent the last month or so getting the real me back - which was noticed by my partner and appreciated. There's so many things going through my mind right now....maybe i get what you're both saying and know in reality I've maybe put myself forward for another (final) fall. Dunno.. I have to try in order to find out the truth I suppose. I have my flaws too - as a female friend once said to me - grow a set of balls and stand up for myself more - which I'm putting into practice - not in a kick *kitten* way - just in a diplomatic, honest way.
anyhows....your post kinda hit an emotional nerve (shed a few tears) - maybe that says alot! :-) I hate doubting the decisions I make0 -
I was actually happier on my own instead of putting up with negative comments such as, your pathetic, you're a failure, you can't do anything
My opinion is that any man who tells you that doesn't respect you and maybe doesn't even really love you. It doesn't matter what you did or how upset he is; there is simply no excuse for that kind of emotional abuse. Praise and compliments and appreciative gestures are meaningless when given to people who are messed up enough in the head to talk to someone they allegedly love in that manner.
So of course there is more to a successful relationship (especially a marriage) than showing each other constant attention and appreciation. If none of it is genuine (i.e. backed up by mutual love and respect), then it's not going to do any good.
Along with cris's comments and previous valuable support - are you both trying to say that perhaps I made the wrong choice in getting back with my boyfriend / partner? I understand totally of where you are coming from.....so far it's only been two weeks that i've been back with him - just seeing how it goes - part of me is waiting for things to go back to the negative. Part of the problem we have is that I sometimes don't communicate very well - mainly when he's stressed and grumpy - I find it hard to approach him - and i told him this recently, which we are working on at the moment. I dunno - maybe I should have stayed on my own longer or permanently - just feel I can't give up on someone who deep down is a great guy that I've been with for so many years through some really hard times. When I'm with someone - I commit to the bitter end. I've spent the last month or so getting the real me back - which was noticed by my partner and appreciated. There's so many things going through my mind right now....maybe i get what you're both saying and know in reality I've maybe put myself forward for another (final) fall. Dunno.. I have to try in order to find out the truth I suppose. I have my flaws too - as a female friend once said to me - grow a set of balls and stand up for myself more - which I'm putting into practice - not in a kick *kitten* way - just in a diplomatic, honest way.
anyhows....your post kinda hit an emotional nerve (shed a few tears) - maybe that says alot! :-) I hate doubting the decisions I make
"grow a set of balls and stand up for myself more - which I'm putting into practice - not in a kick *kitten* way - just in a diplomatic, honest way."
This is what I meant to start with about a lady not accepting 2nd place in my original post.
Now don`t get me wrong either,we are pretty well set as who we are by our late teens so if he has been abusive it will be difficult for him to change.
Maybe this is what will do it. 0 -
I was actually happier on my own instead of putting up with negative comments such as, your pathetic, you're a failure, you can't do anything
My opinion is that any man who tells you that doesn't respect you and maybe doesn't even really love you. It doesn't matter what you did or how upset he is; there is simply no excuse for that kind of emotional abuse. Praise and compliments and appreciative gestures are meaningless when given to people who are messed up enough in the head to talk to someone they allegedly love in that manner.
So of course there is more to a successful relationship (especially a marriage) than showing each other constant attention and appreciation. If none of it is genuine (i.e. backed up by mutual love and respect), then it's not going to do any good.
Along with cris's comments and previous valuable support - are you both trying to say that perhaps I made the wrong choice in getting back with my boyfriend / partner? I understand totally of where you are coming from.....so far it's only been two weeks that i've been back with him - just seeing how it goes - part of me is waiting for things to go back to the negative. Part of the problem we have is that I sometimes don't communicate very well - mainly when he's stressed and grumpy - I find it hard to approach him - and i told him this recently, which we are working on at the moment. I dunno - maybe I should have stayed on my own longer or permanently - just feel I can't give up on someone who deep down is a great guy that I've been with for so many years through some really hard times. When I'm with someone - I commit to the bitter end. I've spent the last month or so getting the real me back - which was noticed by my partner and appreciated. There's so many things going through my mind right now....maybe i get what you're both saying and know in reality I've maybe put myself forward for another (final) fall. Dunno.. I have to try in order to find out the truth I suppose. I have my flaws too - as a female friend once said to me - grow a set of balls and stand up for myself more - which I'm putting into practice - not in a kick *kitten* way - just in a diplomatic, honest way.
anyhows....your post kinda hit an emotional nerve (shed a few tears) - maybe that says alot! :-) I hate doubting the decisions I make
I think its ultimately your choice... communication and honest communication is the key to any good relationship. it sounds to me like y'all hashed things out... stay with him.... however, you know what you don't want if it happens again, then no reason to say, but if he truly does care and truly wants you in his life then the negative comments will stop as he said they would... perhaps some couple counceling would be in order? Just a suggestion, but remember nobody on here knows the situation in its entireity only what you choose to share so take advice/comments think them over, if you feel they apply use them, if you feel they do not, then dont. remember, we do not have to live your life, that is all you.... good luck0 -
I only made it through the first couple of pages and had to stop because it looks as though I'm not girly enough to be dateable LOL I only wear makeup on special occassions, I love watching football and scream at the TV, I have my opinions and voice them, I'm independent, I prefer sittin by the river fishing to dressing up for a big fancy dinner.0
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I only made it through the first couple of pages and had to stop because it looks as though I'm not girly enough to be dateable LOL I only wear makeup on special occassions, I love watching football and scream at the TV, I have my opinions and voice them, I'm independent, I prefer sittin by the river fishing to dressing up for a big fancy dinner.
Why would you think that,many guys including myself have said that those things were hot.0 -
Thanks to those who responded to my comment - realise this isn't a relationship thread, so if you want to friend me in order to communicate any further views/advice by PM's, that's fine. I appreciate what's been said so far.
All I can say is, I commit to the bitter end, I'll see how things develop, but I know deep down that things can easily go backwards like before, if we don't carry on as we have the past few weeks. I'm just trying with the old me back - I hope I don't lose those qualities again. Alot of our problems stem from bringing past events / mistakes up - we're supposed to have wiped the slate clean and starting fresh. So far things are fine, but we'll see.
I'm not gonna bring myself down in dwelling on the what if's because that will draw attention to negativity at this point.in how I am...I've got myself back on track - he seems to have done the same - time will tell. But, if I see a hint of previous happenings - I'll not fight it emotionally, but be strong in walking away. I'm a good person with a big heart at the end of the day but will not tolerate any kind of negativity by him or anyone else again. I'm much stronger this time round. I can and will go it alone if needs be. At least I can say I tried.0 -
I only made it through the first couple of pages and had to stop because it looks as though I'm not girly enough to be dateable LOL I only wear makeup on special occassions, I love watching football and scream at the TV, I have my opinions and voice them, I'm independent, I prefer sittin by the river fishing to dressing up for a big fancy dinner.
Why would you think that,many guys including myself have said that those things were hot.
Many of those things were said by girls, not guys. LOL Or at least the ones that I saw were said by girls. Perhaps I should have read a little further in to find what the guys were saying!!0 -
Curves
A beautiful face
Sense of humor
athletic0 -
Love it!!!World of Warcraft :smokin:0 -
My list of the perfect girl right here:
Sweet.
Non-dramatic.
Honest.
Affectionate.
Intelligent.
Is herself, not faked.
Someone I want to know me.
Can carry meaningful conversations as well as conversations about absolutely nothing.
Likes a lot of the same things I do.
Driven
Ambitious
Dang, long list!
is a nurse! wink wink! haha just kidding... those are very good qualities.. dont ever sacrifice any of them for anything you dont want.0
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