Right age to get married??

sammys1girly

I got married at 21 , had 2 great kids and now im 43, my kids are grown up and I go and do all those things you want to do before you want kids, I would personaly would hate to be 50+ years old with teenagers, I love my life, living it to the max and im still young enough to enjoy it.

Wouldnt change a thing

Stu

I agree. I also wonder about people who get married later b/c they want to do all the thing for "them" and work hard at the career and then want to have kids when they hit late 30's, spend tons of money on ivf, and are parents into their late 60's to kids still at home. By the time my youngest is 18, I will be just over 50 and ready to enjoy time with my husband, traveling and being a grandma

shreyaj

It all depends on how mature you are to enter into that kind of commitment, it's great that you want to travel and do all of things but not everyone has those ambitions (not me personally) some people are content with having a quiet life with a husband and some kids, ain't nothing wrong for that. As for me I'm getting married October 2012 I will be a month shy of 27 when we get married, we have been together for 8 years at our wedding 9 years so we waited a very long time to make sure it was right, and it was worth the wait!

dvarrassi12

I'm 23 and engaged, but will not be married until I'm 24; we've had a 2 year engagement. I truly believe it depends on the individuals. Also, just because you're married doesn't mean you're having kids. I have no intention of popping any out until I'm 30 or older. I've been with my fiance for 4 years and have lived with him for a little over a year now. Marriage at this point is just a piece of paper, we might as well already be married.

samb

it depends on the person for sure. i have been with my bf since i was 14...so after 9 years of being together, i have been ready for marriage for quite a while now. but i am not in a rush either. but just because you are getting married doesn't mean that you have to have children right away, just a thought. i don't plan on having kids for another 7 years or so lol. i dont think marriage would really change anything if you are in a good relationship -- to me it is really just a title and a reason for a fancy celebration :P

lakersfan4life

NEVER

unless you really want to have kids. thats the only good reason i see for a man to get married

Amen (except, you know... for women too)

my bad, original quote edited

MelissaL582

P.S.: Marriage doesn't mean babies for everyone. And certainly not immediately. It always boggled my mind how people get married and instantly pop out kiddos. Don't you want to enjoy your marriage, kid-free, for at LEAST a year or two?

Some couple would say yes. For some crazy reason, I wanted to have a child after we got married. Wouldn't change it for the world. They've made me into the person I am today, but with less hair :laugh:

sammys1girly

I was 22 when I married my husband. Granted it was young but I had a little girl when I was 19 and had been through so much already that I wanted to settle down and get married. I wouldnt change it for the world. I love being a stay at home Mom, it is very rewarding knowing that I am the reason my girls are so smart and well behaved. I work hard everyday as most of you do at your jobs, I just prefer to do this in the house. It's a "to each their own" kinda thing I guess.

Amen!

cheeksv

It takes a type of maturity that I think a lot of young people lack these days. I know older couples that got married young and have been happily married ever since and I know people who got married at 18 and divorced by 19. If you have goals achieve them first but, do not shut out the possibility of finding love. I personally am engaged at 22 and was on my way to school and a career when my fiance got really sick with something serious so I dropped out to take care of him and make sure he knows I am here for him. You are right, you need to be a certain type to have the dedication that marriage requires.A lot of young people ( and grant it I am only 23) are still at a selfish phase. Sometimes they cheat or want things that they cant have because they are married and the marriage fizzles. I think you should have alone time always before you decide to start opening yourself up to marriage. Living alone, traveling , school etc. or else you might find yourself wanting to "find yourself" while married and then you see yourself somewhere else in life without a ball and chain and boom divorce.

laurad1406

as an unmarried (but also never divorced!) 26 year old in a very serious relationship, not getting married young was right for me. In my late teens and early 20s i THOUGHT i was a mature adult and ready, But truth be told I feel like a completely different person now than I was then. I have learned so much in the last 4 years or so. And as much as I love babies and can't wait to have them (eventually!) I'm so glad i did not miss out on that time.

houzkat

I got married at 22. Would I suggest that all 22 year olds are ready for marriage? Heck no. But I met my husband when I was 19 and it was right for us. BUT we decided 5 years seemed a reasonable time to wait on having children since we married so young.

samb

I'm 23 and engaged, but will not be married until I'm 24; we've had a 2 year engagement. I truly believe it depends on the individuals. Also, just because you're married doesn't mean you're having kids. I have no intention of popping any out until I'm 30 or older. I've been with my fiance for 4 years and have lived with him for a little over a year now. Marriage at this point is just a piece of paper, we might as well already be married.

haha wow exactly what i said :P

CajunApril

I got married at 26, and I am 30 now. We are just starting to try for a family. I think the age I got married for me was perfect. I finished two degrees and I knew who I was and what I wanted before trying to make someone else happy ever after. I can't stand it when people tell me they wanted children young so that when they are older the kids are done and gone. personally, the way I see kids is that once you have children you ALWAYS have children. I am 30 years old and still "momma" all the time. Everyone is different though. People do not want the same things. i wanted to do what I wanted to do before devoting my time to others (kids & husband) Some poeple grow up faster than others, some people don't have that option... I think you have to be the judge of your own actions and it comes down to doing what makes "YOU" happy. If you can wait, then I reccomend waiting from my own experiences. I am 30 and still question if I am ready for children, its just a number (age that is) the individual reflects wisdom and maturity, not the number.

megmariew1

I got married 4 days after my 21st birthday and my husband was 23 and I wouldn't change it for the world. It's been 9 years now and we are happier than ever. I think it totally depends on the people getting married. My husband and I were ready for it. If you aren't ready, no matter what age, don't do it.

KendraElmendorf

I got married at 21 , had 2 great kids and now im 43, my kids are grown up and I go and do all those things you want to do before you want kids, I would personaly would hate to be 50+ years old with teenagers, I love my life, living it to the max and im still young enough to enjoy it.

Wouldnt change a thing

Stu

What i'm thinkin... i can have fun after kids too. I don't want to be too old for my grandkids. I'm 24 and have young grand parents who are actually great grandparents to my cousins children. I LOVE the idea of having fun when i am more financially secure as opposed to having fun young. You don't stop living life when you have kids.

LorinaLynn

When you care more about BEING married than GETTING married.

rileamoyer

First marriage at 24, 2nd at 32. Both ages were good for me. Almost married at 19, way too young, but I walked out on a great guy (we reconnected years later and were friends till his death) I am sure we would have ended up divorced and hating each other if we would have married, we were both so immature. I believe you should at least have some time to party after you are 21 so you know what is going on in life before you tie the knot. There are so many wonderful folks out there to meet and places to see. My kids are grown now and I am still young enough to party again LOL

gnastro

I got married at 23 and had my nursing career already. Married my HS sweetheart. We have been married 21 years so far. Four kids Son 20, 3 daughters 17, 16 and 14.I am still young enough and still enjoy running around with them. My daughters and I sometime trades clothes. According to my kids their friends think it is great that their mom is young. Almost 45 and loving life.

princessmikayla5

I'm getting married on my 23rd birthday (June 9, 2012). We've been together for going on eight years now. We've been through a lot, and we always get through it. We're best friends. I can't stress enough that it depends on the situation.

StrengthIDidntKnow

I think it depends on the individual couple.

I got engaged when I was 21, called it off at 23, I just wasn't ready. I think that if I had gone through with it we would be divorced.

I met my husband at 27 and we were married when I was 30. We have been married 7 years, so far, so good.

But I know a few couples that were married young, 19-early twenties and they are really happy, 15+ years later, and then there are also some that married late and just miserable.

karinaes

i'm with you futurefitgirl88! i'm also 23, wana finish school, travel (on my own), establish a career then possibly look into having a life partner. for me, however, it would be closer to 35 and POSSIBLY think then about having/adopting kids.

i'm definitely now where near mature enough or financially stable enough to commit to such a responsibility and bringing in another human into the world.

a lot of my friends (my age--23/24/25) are also on like their 2nd or 3rd child and it makes me wonder if THEY wonder how it feels to NOT be a parent at such a young age.

futurefitgirl88

When I think of marriage the first thing that pops into my mind is the cost...I'm not letting my parents pay for it...and hec I want to have two weddings (be being mixed race have two cultures and my boyfriend is from an entirely different cultural background) and there is no way me and my bf can finance that!!....we live together yes, but marriage is soooo far out of the picture simply because we don't have $$$$ to afford it!!

Also when I think of getting married I feel like I'm old lol!!

My parents got married before they went to grad school....(they were in college)...they had a court registry marriage, no money, lots of hardships...but they turned out fine....they both went to grad school and did very well for themselves...but sometimes I think the hardships that they had to go through (which resulted in a lot of fights) made their relationship quite bitter!!

Also I think when we are older, we are better able to decide what is right for us..... but thanks mammy and daddy for getting married and having me :P

newman84

I got married at 18 and have been happly married since and 2 kids later we have been married 8 years and togeather 9 in october
it really depends on the person
I wanted ot be young enough to enjoy things after my kids move out.

MelissaL582

I got married at 21 , had 2 great kids and now im 43, my kids are grown up and I go and do all those things you want to do before you want kids, I would personaly would hate to be 50+ years old with teenagers, I love my life, living it to the max and im still young enough to enjoy it.

Wouldnt change a thing

Stu

That's another good point about having kids "sooner".

ratsyroo

It definitely depends on the people! Most people are not mature/responsible enough to be married early. BUT I married at only 19 years old (he was 20) and it was the best decision I've ever made. We are extremely happy and been blessed beyond imagination. We have children now, but waited about 3 years before having them. --Now he did have a steady, good paying job, and we were both mature beyond our years! Looking forward to the next 60 or so years with him!

i_love_vinegar

I guess when you meet the right person and also feel ready. :P When I was 18/19 I wanted to get married really badly, but then I found out the tough way "every 6 months reevaluate the relationship/the 2 year rule" my mom had always told me. It was true.

Now I don't care much for marriage in the sense that I would like to one day, but if it never happens that's cool.

My mom told me that as a woman it is better to get married by your early 30's though, since you will have more choices. ^.^

I get a feeling I will get married at around 24-26...but who knows lol.

Mad_Dog_Muscle

I would say as soon as you knock her up and you cant get a passport to leave the country.... whatever that age may be! :smokin:

Froggy1976

When you care more about BEING married than GETTING married.

Great response! I was 20 when we got married. 15 years later still going strong and happy as ever! Although I know a lot of 20 year olds that are not ready...

maserati185

There's a difference between getting married... and getting married and having kids. I do think it's different for everyone, but if I had to blanket recommend... marry 18+... because the kid/s part is the one that will rock your world the most.

PeachyKeene

Depnds on the person. I got married at 16 and divorced 6 months later. I had quite school and turned my life upside down, but it was the best thing I could have ever done. It made me who I am today. I got remarried at 19, had 3 kids back to back, they are 17, 16, 14 1/2 and by the time I am 40 years old they will all be grown. Party time!!!!!

MrsPike07

However I do agree with having children after you get married. Having to share your child with their other parent is no fun and I am sorry I have to do this. I do have a daughter with my husband and we were married 3 yrs before she arrived. Wouldn't change having my kiddos for the world, just wish I was a little older when I had my first :happy: