Dating/Relationship Dealbreakers...

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  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
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    1. Drugs aren't ok, addictions aren't ok (of any kind)
    2. Has to like my dog (I'm not budging on this)
    3. My dog has to like them (she is a better judge of character than I am)
    4. Not want to marry me on date 3 (yes this happened, yes, I continued to date him until he dropped the "L bomb" and I dropped him)
    5. Has to understand I'm his girlfriend, not his property of any kind, I will my my own choices and he can kiss my boots if he doesn't like it.

    all of this! except my dog is a He.

    also :

    cannot be conservative/ultra religious for another faith

    has to be tolerant of faith/sexual identity/race/et al

    CAN NOT WANT/HAVE KIDS! i am not a mom. i am an awesome auntie, but i will NOT have kids, and i will NOT raise yours - and yes i have broken up w/ ppl for this.

    has to be nice to my mom, my family, his family and waitstaff.

    cannot be serious. i am snarky and i love to have fun. i could not deal with a stick-up-the-bum person.
  • rybo
    rybo Posts: 5,424 Member
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    Wow there were some interesting things that made people's lists.
    A lot I figured were things that were just taken for granted such as good hygene, not being in jail, not being violent, drug addict, etc.

    Other than a girl being a smoker,(which I actually broke before, but she quit just a couple months in)
    I'm not sure I have any real deal breaker issues where the situation would even get that far for me to say everything was good except...(insert deal breaker)

    I can list a few things that I'm pretty sure would just never work from the start
    PETA member
    Vegan/Vegetarian (although I dated a girl who was hugely into the raw thing, but broke it all the time cause she enjoyed a good burger, I will say some of those raw recipes were quite tasty)
    Screaming Liberal
    Dumber than a mud fence (See above)
  • statia152
    statia152 Posts: 558
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    When the guy calls you by your sister's name in the middle of sex. It kinda ended that relationship fast!
  • ycc1964
    ycc1964 Posts: 699 Member
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    can I just copy and paste yours?


    and then add:

    Must have their own place, preferrably not a jail cell.

    ROTFL
  • LadyG33
    LadyG33 Posts: 46
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    Yucky teeth, bad breath or body odor!
  • sunkisses
    sunkisses Posts: 2,365 Member
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    Deal-breakers for me, in no particular order.

    - Married or in a committed relationship (BTDT, and it's not based on morals that I say this)

    - Cheating

    - Abusive in any way (to humans, animals, and the earth)

    - Addictive personality (drugs, alcohol, gambling, ho's)

    - No job

    - Does not like children.

    - Rigid in beliefs (religious, political, etc.) Gonna need you to respect the other sides of your own argument otherwise I'll think you don't know WTF you're talking about.

    - A lack of ambition (I'd like my partner to be able to look forward and set goals for himself, even if they're small)

    - Felonious criminal record or recent misdemeanor.

    - Poor character.

    - Dishonest

    - Financially dirt-poor. (I've been struggling my whole life, and I've helped my partners up as far as I could along the way. It's time for me to keep going and enjoy my life without someone else's financial burden.)
  • T_R_A_V
    T_R_A_V Posts: 1,629 Member
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    Smoking is my #1 deal breaker
  • bigdawg025
    bigdawg025 Posts: 774 Member
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  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
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    Why no military? If I weren't married, I nail every other requirement.
    I can relate to this. I would never have married someone in the military. My father was military. I could not endure what my mother went through.
    But are you forsaking all men in the Military, or just lifers? Her original post said uber patriotic/military, which leads me to believe she lumped all military men into the same category. Just asking.
    Fair question. I could not be married to a man currently in the military. If he had served before our relationship, that's perfectly acceptable. I can't speak to what the other poster meant, but this is how I feel.
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
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    weighs less than I
    Heh, I wouldn't have gone out with anyone since 1990 if that were a dealbreaker for me!
  • amelia_atlantic
    amelia_atlantic Posts: 926 Member
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    Pessimistic
    Reliant on drugs or alcohol
    Playing the victim in life
    unmotivated
    lazy
    unintelligent
    critical
    prone to passing on negative news
    unsupportive
    unwilling to communicate openly
    super religious or conservative
    judgemental
    homophobic/sexist/anti-choice
    violent
    easily angered

    YES! This is pretty much my list exactly.
  • bigdawg025
    bigdawg025 Posts: 774 Member
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    My dealbreakers in no particular order -

    Lazy
    Doesn't take care of themselves
    Gives me no sympathy
    Wants to completely change me... yes... I love gambling and drinking!
    Wouldn't support my weight loss journey
    No job - this isn't 1950.
    SMOKING!

    Luckily I don't have to worry about any of these! haha :P
  • JulieSD
    JulieSD Posts: 567
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    - Has kids
    - Religious
    - Gonorrhea
    - Vegan
    - Liberal/Democrat (I'd casually date one but never take her seriously)
    - Unemployed
    - Uneducated

    The last three usually go hand in hand.

    This made me LOL for a few minutes. What a bold statement at the end. I'm still laughing. I'm an educated and surprisingly employed(!!) Liberal. I love a closed mind, just means I have a challenge xoxo
  • ShannaKayB
    ShannaKayB Posts: 157 Member
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    Pessimistic
    Reliant on drugs or alcohol
    Playing the victim in life
    unmotivated
    lazy
    unintelligent
    critical
    prone to passing on negative news
    unsupportive
    unwilling to communicate openly
    super religious or conservative
    judgemental
    homophobic/sexist/anti-choice
    violent
    easily angered

    All of this!
  • MrBrown72
    MrBrown72 Posts: 407 Member
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    Doesn't understand my love of things with blinky LEDs
    gets weird if I make more money than he does.
    No sense of adventure or need to travel and see new things

    the biggie: hates kids

    Everything should have LED's it's how you know it's important and functioning. Okay breasts don't "have" to have LED's however...
  • loristroud
    loristroud Posts: 138 Member
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    Has to be able to survive a zombie apocalypse.
  • chocolateandvodka
    chocolateandvodka Posts: 1,856 Member
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    bad hygeine
    average intelligence or below
    height of less than 72" (men)
    bad grammar/spelling
    they MUST have a vocabulary above 8th grade level
    does hard drugs - ever
    codependent on anything - me, parents, drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, anything.
    little or no concern for health and wellbeing
    low or average sex drive
    unwillingness to explore the unknown
    wants children
    has children
    narrow-minded in any way
    Vegan or ultra-religious - these are basically the same for me
    doesn't think for themselves
    doesn't handle anger well
    unmotivated
    more than 15 years my senior.
    belittling
    STD's of course
    does not understand the meaning of "woo".

    i'm sure there are more - i'm a picky person.
  • mjshmily
    mjshmily Posts: 137 Member
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    -must be employed
    -must be reasonably stable (ie. not homeless)
    -must be sincere and honest
    -should be younger than my dad
    -should weigh less than my horse
    -must not smell (unless he's just getting off work or some other reasonable excuse)
    -must have an IQ higher than a houseplant

    Seriously though, I just want someone that would be willing to get to know me and not be judgemental.
  • blue4myeyes
    blue4myeyes Posts: 93 Member
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    - Has kids
    - Religious
    - Gonorrhea
    - Vegan
    - Liberal/Democrat (I'd casually date one but never take her seriously)
    - Unemployed
    - Uneducated

    The last three usually go hand in hand.

    This made me LOL for a few minutes. What a bold statement at the end. I'm still laughing. I'm an educated and surprisingly employed(!!) Liberal. I love a closed mind, just means I have a challenge xoxo

    I totally agree!! Educated, employed, Liberal -- and proud of it!

    I'm sure there are plenty of uneducated and unemployed Conservatives and Liberals just as there are plenty of both Liberals and Conservatives that ARE educated and employed. I don't find that the education and employment have any relation to political views.
  • Saruman_w
    Saruman_w Posts: 1,531 Member
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    Think my main ones are

    smoking
    drug-use
    alcoholic
    already has kids ( would rather have my own one day)
    excessive tattoos ( I can tolerate a few.. but all over? A turn off )
    somewhat healthy eating habits ( not a requirement, but it would be nice to have someone keep me in line )
    whackjob in either end of the political spectrum ( I like a middle-ground )

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