What age is appropriate for you kid to start dating?

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  • BlessedandBeautifulBrown
    BlessedandBeautifulBrown Posts: 464 Member
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    13 group date.. 16 single date
  • _Ben
    _Ben Posts: 1,608 Member
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    As I said, kids shouldnt be alone until you know the other kid for a while. In the end you can never fully protect them, but being smart is always the best option. Talk to them, make sure they are aware of the consiquences of their actions, and not just sex alone. Make sure for at least the first while, they are either suppervised, or if they are going to a destination, you give them a time frame to return. Also, they gotta date someone their age. No 16 yearold girl should EVER be dating a college guy. Why? The same reason he isnt dating girls his own age. Hes a creeper and trying to take advantage of a younger girl
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    Also, I think more importantly than stressing a specific age it's important to talk about it with your kids, try to impart on them to be careful, to have self respect, to understand that sex and relationships are about love and not about power or blame or guilt. Try to teach them to have healthy relationships. Why? Because you can set whatever age you want, but you don't know what's going on when you're not around, and you have to trust them to treat themselves with respect in relationships (part of that being sex).
  • luv_lea
    luv_lea Posts: 1,094 Member
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    Let's see, he's 2 now, so I'm thinking 25 . . .

    haha ^^this! my daughter is 2 now, so not until she's 25 or 30!

    but in all honesty, probably in high school. at first, supervised dates (like watching a movie with me there to pop my head in) but then at 17ish, alone with the guy. But ONLY with guys I have met several times and approve of! And I'm not sure if I agree with driving together (I remember what happens with 2 teenagers alone in a car!) and I'm still iffy on going to movies alone (same idea as the car!) I'm 110% for group dating! :laugh:

    I agree with this. I guess everyone could have a different definition of 'dating' but Yes, supervised is a big key to it all until a certain point, and also how responsible/trust worthy the child is.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    repeat post
  • bzmom
    bzmom Posts: 1,332 Member
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    I have two boys 14 and soon to be 11 next month and a 2year old daughter. My eldest had a little "girlfriend" already during the summer just before turning 14. He was allowed to go out to see her for 2hrs. Before anyone frowns uppon this let me say I was 16 when I got pregnant I truly believe that communication is the key when talking to your teens. My parents never talked to me about anything and I am being as open to communication as I can be with my kids. Needless to say that little "relationship" didnt last too long about 2 weeks LOL!!! My 11 year old says he has a girl friend but he never goes out anywhere so I think its just a school crush and well my 2 year old well I think she is too fisty at two cant imagine her at 16 LOL! besides with 2 older brothers and an over protective dad I think she is introuble.
  • kmtetour
    kmtetour Posts: 300 Member
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    BTW, at 27, having been married and divorced, I think my dad would still prefer I didn't date! He still sees me as his little girl. I live on my own, but I bet he'd be all "I want to meet this guy" in a gruff manner if I had a new boyfriend.
  • iamlegion714
    iamlegion714 Posts: 50 Member
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    Define dating first.

    Middle School age kids go to movies etc. as a group many times.... they probably consider that a date. Mom and Dad driving their child to meet someone at a school dance is probably considered a date to many. I also think it depends on the child, their maturity level, the age difference between the two wanting to date, is the boy driving the girl and are they alone etc. etc. etc.

    yup
  • BigDaddyBRC
    BigDaddyBRC Posts: 2,395 Member
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    I have a 5 year-old son and a 15 year old daughter...
    For him...when I feel he has enough respect...so I'll put it out there around 14.
    For her....when chastity belt rusts off.
  • skittybang
    skittybang Posts: 1,525 Member
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    Same age you tell a highway it was adopted (cr ZG)
  • iamlegion714
    iamlegion714 Posts: 50 Member
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    Wow, every poster said it. Wow. I just cant understand people

    Really dude? Loosen up. Joke a little. Do you need a hug?

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • courtney_dawn
    courtney_dawn Posts: 1
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    I think 15 or 16 is good. If a 13 or 14 year old wants to call someone their boyfriend/girlfriend and hang out occasionally, that's cool. But 15/16 is about right. That way they can drive, or if they are 15, more than likely the other is older and can. Big thing is that at 15, if you are going on a date, you do not want your parents to have to drive you. So for serious dating, 16.

    (I am 18 and been dating my fiance since I was 16. But I was going out with older guys who could drive at 14 or 15. Just personal experience. I'm not a parent, so I'm sure most wouldn't want their little ones out running around.)
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    For her....when chastity belt rusts off.

    :laugh:

    You're a good daddy! :drinker:
  • foremant86
    foremant86 Posts: 1,115 Member
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    As a 20 year old, really dating in my opinion, as a guy, shouldnt happen until 16, when you can drive yourself places. Anything before is just childish crushes, saying you are boyfriend and girlfriend, when you have only maybe held hands, never talk to eachother, whatever. Everything before, getting drove by your parents, etc is not only akward for the kids, but really akward for the parents too.

    Note: This is coming from a serious place, not the whole irritating and annoying, my daughter is never gonna date because she is not allowed to have a life, or live in any fashion like a normal human being. I feel as though as soon as this reply posts there will be 5 people who said exactly that, but Im just saying, these people are being simply rediculous, and are not working to actually help the poster, they just think that joking about overparenting is cute.

    I agree with this. 16 is a perfectly good age to start dating.
  • criselia95
    criselia95 Posts: 18 Member
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    I have a daughter; shes 16 going to be 17 years old soon. Shes never had a boyfriend eventhough I gave her permission to start dating a little before her 16th birthday. She is very mature and takes her schooling seriously. Besides school work, she has a bunch of activities.

    I think every child is different. If they want to start dating and thats all they think about, then they are probably not ready. When Ive asked her when is she finally going to give boys a chance to get to know her, she replies, she is very busy and wouldnt have time for a relationship. I just hope she doesnt turn into a 40 year old virgin.

    Great topic.
  • Charice
    Charice Posts: 188 Member
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    I have set the rule of no dating until my kids are 16. I will allow for group activities (school dances, parties, etc.) at 14, but I have to know where they are going and who they wil be with. I think by allowing for group activities it hasn't really affected my kids socially to wait until 16 for real dating. In addition, I insist on a group or double date for big dances such as Prom. My kids know about the rule from infancy so I haven't had any issues of complaining about it. It's just the way it is and they know it. I think it also depends on the kid...I have a son that didn't date until he was almost 18, he just wasn't interested or ready. Whatever you choose...good luck! It is a scary time for a parent.
  • SailingMike
    SailingMike Posts: 237 Member
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    ... because, lets be honest, she'll probably do it behind our backs if we put an age restriction on her ...

    WOW... if you start with that attitude you have already lost! Did my kids do things behind my back? Maybe, but that never stopped me from setting REASONABLE rules and enforcing them. We are parents and need to act like parents. NEVER be afraid of setting limits.

    On the other hand, a wise man and successful father told me, "Never say "NO" to your kids unless you have a good reason." And folks, sometimes just having a bad "feeling" about it IS a good reason.

    One more bit from me, a father of 7.... I always allowed my children the option of buying out of trouble. If they were grounded for bad grade, all they needed was a note from the teacher saying the grade was improved and the punishment ended. Other things required special extra service (work) around the home or in the community to buy a pass.
  • morganhccstudent724
    morganhccstudent724 Posts: 1,261 Member
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    I don't have children.

    I had a boyfriend at 14. We were kissing/above the belt at 15.

    Sex at 16.

    It depends on the child.
  • baisleac
    baisleac Posts: 2,019 Member
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    ... because, lets be honest, she'll probably do it behind our backs if we put an age restriction on her ...

    WOW... if you start with that attitude you have already lost!

    My parents had that same attitude and it worked really really well.

    Trust is a two way street. If the parents teach the child right and trust them, the child is more likely to trust the parents' advice. IMO, of course.
  • sarah_ep
    sarah_ep Posts: 580 Member
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    I haven't read the other responses, but I will tell you what I think based on my experiences. I was not allowed to date until after I was out of high school. At this point, I was already about move out of the house and start my own life. I had no experience or guidance when did this happen because I was not allowed to date under supervision. I made a lot of mistakes and had to learn a lot of things the hard way. My other friends who were not allowed to date just did so behind their parents back - this was usually much worse than if the parents had been involved.

    Therefore, I believe that you should make that decision when your child tells you they want to date someone, and then set up appropriate boundaries.

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