Baby help! Going a bit crazy!

turningstar

I haven't read all the replies, but at her age I would say give her the only thing she has known- you. Babies only know one thing for a very long time. That is that they NEED YOU. All they have ever known is being in your tummy or in your arms. Babies cries are meant to be responded to. Try rocking her or nursing her to sleep and then laying her in her crib. Is the crib in your room? Keep her close so that she knows you're there for her.

My son just turned one, and has slept with me since day one. Sometimes its a pain, but it's so much better than letting him cry. He has an intense need for physical contact. Someday I know he wont want to cuddle or hug, so I will deal with the inconvenience
now.

Im not necessarily suggesting you cosleep. It isn't for everyone, and if you don't feel comfortable you shouldn't do it. You should give her all the love and attention you can though, you can't possibly spoil a baby at this age.

momof3and3

here are my thoughts...I have had 5 babies, my other child we adopted when he was a teenager, and have fostered babies and children...

Your baby is too little to let her cry it out....she is still in the early stages of her life where responding to her crys is upmost important for her mental well being....believe me, i have fostered children that had not had those needs met, they become adults with huge issues

that being said, i am a stickler for sleep

put her in her crib thru the day...to nap and to play so she becomes famiiar with it and it becomes a safe, fun place to be...

if she will sleep in the bassinet without any issues, put the bassinet in her room, right by her crib...do this for about a week, so she gets used to being in by herself

keep a "lovey" with her at all times...a blanket, a stuffed animal...whatever...this will become her security blanket that she will use to self soothe...keep it with her when she is awak playinh, being fed, napping, in car seat, stroller, etc....

also, the shock of the cold sheet against her little head when you go to lay her down can wake her....warm the spot where her head goes with a heating pad...take pad away before she lays down on a nice cozy sheet

Hope this helps....

also..maybe she needs more food during the day...up her feedings to another .5 ounces in each bottle, since she is a growing girl...

I like my sleep, I didn't sleep with any of mine in my room with me after 6 weeks...but I also disn't care where they slept as long as the slept thru the night...my youngest wanted her pack and play to sleep in until she was 4 (she is a tiny little thing)....so she had her bed and the pack and play at the end of the bed....it worked for her and us....she was safe, happy and slept!

Do what works for you and your family, you are the one living thru it...at the end of the day raising a happy healthy loving person is what matters, not where or how the slept....

Bridget28152723

I have 4 kids and have heard all different kinds of advice on this topic. I hate to her a newborn cry, because it makes me feel bad, so I pick them up and bring them to bed with me. I read a book once and it had some good points, your baby has been next to you for months in your belly, she doesnt want sleep by herself , she wants the warmth of your body...In times way back children slept with their parents, why put your baby all the way across the house , I personally dont hear my baby cry when Im in a deep sleep, but my husband does. Bottom line enjoy the cuddling time now, you will never get it back, you and your husband will have lots of time for "togetherness" when your kids are grown up. If you really would rather her/him to sleep in their crib, it will take some training , and she will get used to sleeping in her crib..it is safer there ..like she cant fall out like she can in your bed. Swaddling might help , if this is your 1st one , take advice ffrom parents who have been thru this . My daughter is 9 months old and I may put her to sleep in her crib but she ends up with me in the morning..i love sleeping with her but thats me, good luck!

livnlite

Routine is one thing, but abandoning an infant (of only a few months old) in a bed to just 'cry it out' because the parent decides it's nap time, is just not in MY books of parenting. Babies that young are fussing because of how they are feeling .. not because they know how to manipulate.

There could be a few reasons why an infant fusses when put into a crib. 1st and foremost, you have to make sure your baby is not suffering from any sort of medical condition or even indigestion. 2ndly .. Infants are extemely sensitve to environment. Remember, they just came from a dark, warm and soft place. The contrary openness/coldness of the room, the firmness of the mattress or even lighting may be disturbing. You may find it helpful to invest in a crib devices that you can install that plays nice relaxing music with a nitelight to help sooth a fussy baby. Pacifying with a soother or even a ultra soft blanket next to their skin may do the trick. I've even heard of wrapping a baby very snuggly in a blanket to mimick the feeling of being in the womb. I've seen even just that work when nothing else does. You have to experiment and find what soothes your own baby.

And don't forget they are also very senstive to your own emotions and 'vibes'. If you are feeling stressed or tense while you are putting the baby to bed, they will react. If you are tense or nervous .. so are they.

In any event, I wish you all the best. You will work it out.

WifeNMama

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child - Dr. Marc Weissbluth.
Every parent should have a copy of this book. It details what sleep pattern to expectat each age, newborn to teenagers. It teaches how to sleep train and when, possible problems that could arise and how to deal with them. And how many hours of sleep each age needs at night and during naps, etc.
Seriously, everyone can benefit from this book. And I also love the swaddler sleep sacks. Keeps them snug. :-)
Your baby is acting very typical for her age. At least you know its normal. :-)

The book also offers alternative methods: crib sleep or family bed, and when babies are older he advises according to preferred sleep training method: parent soothes to sleep, controlled crying, cry it out, etc. Children need sleep, sleep deprivation can cause a host of problems, educational and behavioral, and this doctor specializes in making sure children consistently get enough sleep.
And if Mama gets enough sleep, the whole day goes a lot better for everyone.
If you are experiencing any post partum depression, getting some sleep will make a world of difference. I've been there. Enlist family or friends if you need to.

Elixandra

I think snuggles are the best way since your little one is so young still. I don't like the cry it out thing at such a young age. Try as one other poster said crib naps and random play in the crib and if you can use your pack in play at night so the babys closer by. I did that untill my sons were 6 months. Start a soothing routine. Bath if it dosnt wake baby up, lotion massage, singing, maybe walk around with baby just talking to them for 10 mins before bed. Whatever makes baby happy and calm. Good luck to you. You will find a way that works best for everyone.

ayeshakane

my sisters baby is the same. They tried everything but nothing worked. So finally they just bought a bigger bed and the baby sleeps with them now.

Bahet

Be VERY wary of any book or "doctor" or anecdotes about people who "trained" their 3mo to sleep through the night. They didn't. What they did was train the baby that no one is there for them and they are on their own. The baby gave up on having their needs met. It's cruel. Oh sure, some kids will be just fine. Some kids of crack *kitten* go on to be college graduates too. That doesn't mean a crack *kitten* is a good mother.

Babies don't "cry just to cry" anymore than an adult cries just to cry. It's their only means of communication. They can't scratch their leg if it itches or say "Mommy, my tummy hurts." That doesn't mean they need to co-sleep or even sleep in the same room. Neither of our boys did. I tried to co-sleep with kid1 for 2 nights. I didn't get a bit of sleep. Everythiem hubby or baby moved I jolted awake. I was worried I'd roll onto him, hubby would roll onto him, the cat would jump up on him, the blanket would smother him, etc. By the 3rd day I was disoriented and borderline hallucinating I was so exhausted. I put him in his crib that night and we all slept much better after that.

my 3 month old slept from 12am- 7am daily and i am not a "crack *kitten*". :laugh:

I never said you (or anyone else here) was a crack *kitten*. I was relating the anecdote of "CIO worked for me" to anecdotes of where a bad parent produced good results.

If your 3mo slept from 12-7 that's wonderful! If he/she woke at 4am and you ignored them to let them CIO that's not even close to good and it's also not the same as sleeping through the night.

LovelyMumOf2

I haven't read the replies yet, and im sure this has been said...
but OH MY GOSH! she's a BABY! LOVE on her. pick her up. rock her. come on now....why would you let a 3 month old cry them self to sleep when clearly shes terrified of that crib!?

right now, at this age, you are only teaching her that when she needs her mommy, you will just ignore her.

sounds harsh, but its true in my completely honest opinion.

LovelyMumOf2

I haven't read the replies yet, and im sure this has been said...
but OH MY GOSH! she's a BABY! LOVE on her. pick her up. rock her. come on now....why would you let a 3 month old cry them self to sleep when clearly shes terrified of that crib!?

right now, at this age, you are only teaching her that when she needs her mommy, you will just ignore her.

sounds harsh, but its true in my completely honest opinion.
They're only little for so long. soon theyll be wanting to go off and do their own thing and youll wish you had taken advantage of the late night cuddles with your little one.

mussmom

You have your husband for the rest of your life. You have your babies for 18 years. Then they move out to the real world. Right now she is two months, turn back around and she is going to kindergarten, blink and she will be going to middle school, in another minute she goes from a little girl to a young lady, then she has her first crush, then she is graduating. You only have this time to hold and cuddle her now. Would you rather spend that time, say, watching some dumb tv show? (I am not saying you are, just trying to give an example).
That said, there are all kinds of advice on this post. Do what feels right for the two of you. You will never regret the bond you build during this time.

zontuin

I'm late replying to this thread, but still wanted to anyway.
Congratulations on your new little daughter! I'm sure she's beautiful and precious, but it might be hard to remember or feel that way when you're sleep deprived.

I used two books that I read for information and guidance. I got a lot out of both of them. My advice: read up, educate yourself, and you'll figure out quickly what you & your husband feel comfortable with. Good luck, and try to enjoy this special time!
1. The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night (Author = Elizabeth Pantley)
2. Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems: New, Revised, and Expanded Edition (Author = Richard Ferber)