Parents Please Wake Up
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I would argue that its not the food thats making children fat, its the lack of activity. I ate fast food, pizza etc.. growing up, pretty regularly but I played a lot of sports and ran around the neighborhood with friends. I was a skinny kid. I didnt get over weight until I got married, had kids and started working a job where I sat on my butt all day. Kids nowadays dont go outside, they dont ride around the neighborhood on their bikes. They sit in front of a tv and play X Box. When I was a kid I would wake up on Saturday morning and eat breakfast and my dad would say "go outside and play" I would go outside till lunch, then back out till dinner then back out till street lights came on. That doesnt happen now. Kids dont even walk around mow lawns anymore. adults do.
I COMPLETELY agree!! I am amazed at how many children are extremely inactive. A friend of ours has a son who is definitely overweight and refuses to walk to his friend's house. He wants a ride to go up three blocks! Smh. I usually don't have to make my boys go outside because they WANT to go outside. It helps that we have a basketball court at home too but, they are very active in sports as well. I would have to believe that there is a correlation with inactive parents and inactive children. Children, for the most part, imitate their parents' behaviors. When I was growing up, I did not have an option about what I ate. My mother cooked everything homemade and a lot of vegetables. She would cook turnips and make me eat them. Yuck! :sick: I do agree that parents can control at least two of the meals their children eat each day.0 -
I'm going to try to say this in the nicest way possible. I was friends with you on here once before, and you always seem to care way too much about the actions of others. You should focus on your weight loss instead of trying to start debates on here all the time.0
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Which is exactly what parents that abuse their child in other ways say. Few abusive parents admit that they are abusive. But I suppose we should all just ignore it.
WTH? Why are you insinuating I abuse my children?
Trust me, I know the cycle of abuse, I know how abusive parents act. I work with abused children every day in my line of work. I'm not saying ignore ABUSE. Genuine ABUSE. I'm saying it's really none of anyone's business what I feed my kid if they are generally well taken care of... which they are.:drinker:0 -
I think the majority of the problem is on the other side of the calories consumed/calories burned equation. Kids just aren't as active anymore.
Growing up, I played every sport imaginable and was very active. If it wasn't mini-football practice, I was either shooting hoops or riding my bike all over the place. Of course, I played my fair share of Nintendo, but it was all in moderation. I think kids are just so consumed with the computer and video games anymore.0 -
It is not abuse to feed your child McDonalds.(Although I have to admit feeding it to them daily seems rather expensive and could damage their health)
Its not abuse if they had Ramon noodles and Pop tart for breakfast.
If you really want to get down to abuse lets talk about the One Year old child whose father TAPED HER UP and than proceeded to post pictures on Facebook.
Lets talk about the poor souls out there who starve their children. Beat them.
Someone who gives their child junk food daily because thats how they do it is not abuse.
You should find the true meaning of ABUSE.
I have a daughter and I feed her "healthy" food, but on the same hand she still gets fruit snacks and pizza. Its about balance.
If you think that feeding a child to point of obesity is not abusive, then I would suggest that you need to learn the meaning of the work abuse. Food CAN be abusive. I never said or implied anything about McD or snacks or any other specific food. I said feeding a child so poorly that is becomes abusive. Vist a pediatric bariatric surgery ward and then tell me that it's impossible to abuse a child with food.0 -
I remember having a weight problem all my life. Fast food was a treat, we were outside playing more often than not, we didn't have sweets everyday... so its not always what the parents feed their kids.
I have two teenage girls, they are both happy and healthy and when I was at my biggest we ate fast food ALL THE TIME due to me not having the time/energy to cook. They were skinny as rails. So it's not always fast food/pizza/treats either. They were lucky I guess. Now that they are older they are still healthy. Not rails, not obese, perfectly normal with beautiful, "to die for", bodies. We eat fast food on occasion, usually when my busy schedule collides with a "oh crap, I forgot to take something out" day.
Sometimes, its genetics. Sometimes it is what is being put on the plate. I hate when people blame parents, but I agree with the intent of the message. Kids need to be kicked out of the house to entertain themselves and not be entertained by the boob tube. Kids need to learn how to love a good salad (from an early age, mine would eat 1/2 my salad on any given day), and they need to learn that everything is good in moderation.
There are two completely, polar opposite effects of food. A) You can completely restrict all sweets/soda/etc and risk adverse effects of secret snacking and adult over-indulgence or
You can let the kids rule the roost and do as they please catering to their whims. My favorite line is "I am NOT a short order cook, you will eat what is in front of you or you will not eat at all", even the pickiest eaters that come to my house will eat after they are told they have no other option. Healthy is somewhere in the middle, and most parents do their very best to find the happy middle with the information and tools they have available to them. 0 -
Okay-- this thread has gone off the deep end. That took longer than I thought it would. :noway:
I totally love the "child abuse" topic-- people get right up on their high horse and decide what behavior in others is abusive. We all have different ideas of what abuse is-- lemme tell you-- I'm no fan of the Santa Claus lie nor of dumping kids in daycare-- is my opinion controversial? You betcha.
But my business? Nope-- which is why (save this particular example) I would never dare to offer an opinion-- They're your kids. Raise 'em how you see fit. Put a helmet on 'em if you want to. You can even, GASP, put them in the front seat of your car....I really don't care. They're YOUR kids. Immunize them or don't-- they're your kids. Feed 'em tofu or Big Macs-- they're your kids. You raise yours. I'll raise mine. I
Reasonable people with sense KNOW what constitutes abuse-- we all know it when we see it. Feeding a kid a Twinkie doesn't quite cut it.0 -
My mom made dinner at home every night of the week. I literally can count on 1 hand the amount of times that my parents took us for fast food when we were growing up, yet when I moved out on my own I made the choice to run to Burger King everyday for lunch and pick up McDonald's on my way home for dinner. I moved out of my parents home weighing 140lbs and a year later I weighed 193lbs. My eating habits were not my parents fault, they were mine.
Now (almost 20 years later) that I have my own children I try to teach them balance and moderation. We don't eat a lot of fast food (I rarely eat any) but if we're out running errands & they want a quick snack/meal I'm not dead set against running through a drive thru either. I don't allow soft drinks in our home, but I know they drink it when they're with friends or other family members.
I do agree that parents should be teaching their children healthy eating habits, but I also think as an adult you need to accept responsibility for your own choices and actions.0 -
Which is exactly what parents that abuse their child in other ways say. Few abusive parents admit that they are abusive. But I suppose we should all just ignore it.
WTH? Why are you insinuating I abuse my children?
Trust me, I know the cycle of abuse, I know how abusive parents act. I work with abused children every day in my line of work. I'm not saying ignore ABUSE. Genuine ABUSE. I'm saying it's really none of anyone's business what I feed my kid if they are generally well taken care of... which they are.:drinker:
You obviously misunderstood my posts.0 -
Reasonable people with sense KNOW what constitutes abuse-- we all know it when we see it. Feeding a kid a Twinkie doesn't quite cut it.
Has there been a post on here that said it was?0 -
Which is exactly what parents that abuse their child in other ways say. Few abusive parents admit that they are abusive. But I suppose we should all just ignore it.
WTH? Why are you insinuating I abuse my children?
Trust me, I know the cycle of abuse, I know how abusive parents act. I work with abused children every day in my line of work. I'm not saying ignore ABUSE. Genuine ABUSE. I'm saying it's really none of anyone's business what I feed my kid if they are generally well taken care of... which they are.:drinker:
You obviously misunderstood my posts.
Seems to be a problem with a lot of the things you post. Maybe you should just stop trying.0 -
I don't take offense to the original post and I also don't find it annoying. It's clearly an emotional thing for her to discuss with us. She feels upset and I don't blame her. Parents do influence their children's eating habits. They don't control every aspect of their child's eating, but they do set the tone (and, as others have posted, parents can also be too restrictive). As a parent who frequently does buy fast food, my personal perspective is that not all fast food is created equal... not to mention, there are other things to consider like portions... how much sugar the children are eating... how much activity the children are getting... and how they are being nurtured, emotionally.
That said, being a parent is really difficult. Particularly if you are struggling to get by, financially, or a single parent. Parents are sometimes choosing the lesser evils in the moment, as they struggle to find stability. I do think the post, upset and all, was well-intended though and makes a great point - as a parent, be a "conscious eater" for yourself and your children. And if you aren't educated on the subject of food, it's a good goal to work towards.
this!0 -
Which is exactly what parents that abuse their child in other ways say. Few abusive parents admit that they are abusive. But I suppose we should all just ignore it.
WTH? Why are you insinuating I abuse my children?
Trust me, I know the cycle of abuse, I know how abusive parents act. I work with abused children every day in my line of work. I'm not saying ignore ABUSE. Genuine ABUSE. I'm saying it's really none of anyone's business what I feed my kid if they are generally well taken care of... which they are.:drinker:
You obviously misunderstood my posts.
Seems to be a problem with a lot of the things you post. Maybe you should just stop trying.
???0 -
also, the opposite is not the best way.
I grew up fighting over sweets with my older brother, because our mom never bought them to us, she didn't want us to get fat and ruin our teeth.
When we got them as present we would always fight about who got more...
So i became selfish and when i'm eating chocolate or something it's like i'm afraid my brother is going to eat it instead, and there will be no chocolate left for me.
This is why I gained weight.
Now that i'm older and i'm living alone, i make all the food decisions by myself, i can have all the junk food i want... but still there's that "child nature" in me.
of course, children like sweets, but making them available will maybe make children crave them less... and not care about the candy drawer.
oh and by the way, my brother is overweight now too, the reason i'm slim is that i'm watching what i eat.
so it affected both of us.
THIS0 -
Here's a question for you, Stacy. Do you even have children?0
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also, the opposite is not the best way.
I grew up fighting over sweets with my older brother, because our mom never bought them to us, she didn't want us to get fat and ruin our teeth.
When we got them as present we would always fight about who got more...
So i became selfish and when i'm eating chocolate or something it's like i'm afraid my brother is going to eat it instead, and there will be no chocolate left for me.
This is why I gained weight.
Now that i'm older and i'm living alone, i make all the food decisions by myself, i can have all the junk food i want... but still there's that "child nature" in me.
of course, children like sweets, but making them available will maybe make children crave them less... and not care about the candy drawer.
oh and by the way, my brother is overweight now too, the reason i'm slim is that i'm watching what i eat.
so it affected both of us.
Same here! I agree that junk should not be a daily habit. I make my son eat veggies everyday and try to steer clear of soda and processed stuff as a much as possible, but if he eats well, I let him have what he wants every now and then otherwise he may go crazy on it when he does get it. When I was a kid, my parents only gave us very healthy stuff and I was a good weight but we were also poor and did not get pizza or sweets and chips. Therefore as a grown-up...I go hog wild because "I can." It's a delicate balance between healthy and junk I think.0 -
Which is exactly what parents that abuse their child in other ways say. Few abusive parents admit that they are abusive. But I suppose we should all just ignore it.
WTH? Why are you insinuating I abuse my children?
Trust me, I know the cycle of abuse, I know how abusive parents act. I work with abused children every day in my line of work. I'm not saying ignore ABUSE. Genuine ABUSE. I'm saying it's really none of anyone's business what I feed my kid if they are generally well taken care of... which they are.:drinker:
You obviously misunderstood my posts.
Nope, pretty sure your "meaning" was crystal clear. Nice backpeddling, though.0 -
Just posting that parents should be healthier doesn't help the problem. You've posed no solution to the problem other than 'parents should do better'. The problem is far more complex than that and acting like it's a simple matter is, in my opinion, a disservice.
Don't be so myopic. One doesn't have to have a mapped out strategy plan to call attention to a problem. Sometimes just starting a dialog about an issue can be helpful and plant some seeds.
Exactly! If you had all the answers, you would not have brought it up in the first place but have started an infomercial to sell the secret formula! lol0 -
Bravo!0
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Which is exactly what parents that abuse their child in other ways say. Few abusive parents admit that they are abusive. But I suppose we should all just ignore it.
WTH? Why are you insinuating I abuse my children?
Trust me, I know the cycle of abuse, I know how abusive parents act. I work with abused children every day in my line of work. I'm not saying ignore ABUSE. Genuine ABUSE. I'm saying it's really none of anyone's business what I feed my kid if they are generally well taken care of... which they are.:drinker:
You obviously misunderstood my posts.
Nope, pretty sure your "meaning" was crystal clear. Nice backpeddling, though.
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It is not abuse to feed your child McDonalds.(Although I have to admit feeding it to them daily seems rather expensive and could damage their health)
Its not abuse if they had Ramon noodles and Pop tart for breakfast.
If you really want to get down to abuse lets talk about the One Year old child whose father TAPED HER UP and than proceeded to post pictures on Facebook.
Lets talk about the poor souls out there who starve their children. Beat them.
Someone who gives their child junk food daily because thats how they do it is not abuse.
You should find the true meaning of ABUSE.
I have a daughter and I feed her "healthy" food, but on the same hand she still gets fruit snacks and pizza. Its about balance.
I agree! I think the word "abuse" was thrown around pretty lightly here. Feeding your children fast food or other not so healthy foods on a DAILY basis isn't "abuse".....Maybe we could consider it some form of neglect, because the parents are neglecting to teach their children the importance of eating a balanced diet......but by far is it considered "abuse"....
My children ask me everyday on the way home, mom can we have McDonalds...sometimes I stop and on other days I simply say...no not today honey. The alternative is, I go home and make them a hamburger and they have baked fries instead. Its all about balance and its our jobs as parents to teach that balance.0 -
Here's a question for you, Stacy. Do you even have children?
No need to get mean and hateful. This is obviously something that the OP is passionate about and I, for me, am thankful for people like her who CARE enough to even post it.
And yes, I HAVE 2 CHILDREN.0 -
Which is exactly what parents that abuse their child in other ways say. Few abusive parents admit that they are abusive. But I suppose we should all just ignore it.
WTH? Why are you insinuating I abuse my children?
Trust me, I know the cycle of abuse, I know how abusive parents act. I work with abused children every day in my line of work. I'm not saying ignore ABUSE. Genuine ABUSE. I'm saying it's really none of anyone's business what I feed my kid if they are generally well taken care of... which they are.:drinker:
You obviously misunderstood my posts.
Nope, pretty sure your "meaning" was crystal clear. Nice backpeddling, though.
I'm not "backpeddling" you suggested that it was nobody's business what parents feed their children. I suggested it certainly was if what they were feeding them was detrimental to their health. That's what I said and that's what I meant. I did not mention you or anyone that was obese. (honestly I still do not know to what obese person you were referring)0 -
it's too bad you thought you'd get bad responses for your post. I'm proud of you for saying every word of it. I'd give you the biggest hug you've had today if I could. You're absolutely right...we buy the food for our kids and the choices should be healthy food first, every day! I'm a grandma now and have a very healthy diet but wish I would've been more concerned while my kids were growing. We always made healthy food in the kitchen but definitely did our share of "Burger King." You get a 1000 points from me and best of health to you in 2012.
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I don't think it's harder than it seems. I have 2 boys, and both WERE kind of fussy eaters. But as the mom, I'm the boss, and I know right from wrong. Kids won't starve themselves, and if you give them no alternative than healthier food, they will get used to it, and grow healthy eating habits.
What I did was say "this is what you have to eat, and if you don't want to eat it now, you can eat it later.". Then, when they decided they were truly hungry, they would eat it regardless. Because of this, my son will eat cabbage and tomatoes. Because of this my other son will eat spring mix salad and onions.
I think a lot of people don't want to be "mean" to their kids, but being mean is not teaching them to be healthy. At least I know by controlling what they eat, I'm helping them to prevent obesity, heart disease, high cholesterol, etc. (and kids CAN have all this, and an early age too).
Sweets are ok, once in a while (you can even find somewhat healthy sweets!), but the key is MODERATION.0 -
Here's a question for you, Stacy. Do you even have children?
No need to get mean and hateful. This is obviously something that the OP is passionate about and I, for me, am thankful for people like her who CARE enough to even post it.
And yes, I HAVE 2 CHILDREN.
Well this is something I am passionate about. Child Abuse is serious and many times is either taken too seriously or not enough. I see child abuse. So to have someone say that feeding your child Pizza child abuse is rather annoying. I love my daughter but giving her McDonalds on tuesday and Pizza on Wednesday doesnt make it abuse.
Its a lack of education. These parents are probably obese themselves.0 -
Your post brought tears to my eyes. I so understand what you are saying and with 4 kids of my own I have struggled to teach my kids to make good choices. My husband has been obese all his life. His mother never told him no, He would eat what ever and when ever he wanted. He ended up having gastric bypass at 40 years old. It has been a huge blessing but I know its not for eveyone one. I fight my husbands bad habits all the time. I took on his eating habits when we got married and I have gained 70 pounds since we were wed. I only have one slightly over weight child now but I did have three at one point. You are so right to warn other parents about this issue. We are the first teachers to our children. Good for you. I love this post.
Now I will go and read what others have said.
Deb:flowerforyou:0 -
Her point is "stop feeding babies and children sugar and Junk."0
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Her point is "stop feeding babies and children sugar and Junk."
Right. So say that. Why throw around the word child abuse??0 -
Okay-- this thread has gone off the deep end. That took longer than I thought it would. :noway:
I totally love the "child abuse" topic-- people get right up on their high horse and decide what behavior in others is abusive. We all have different ideas of what abuse is-- lemme tell you-- I'm no fan of the Santa Claus lie nor of dumping kids in daycare-- is my opinion controversial? You betcha.
But my business? Nope-- which is why (save this particular example) I would never dare to offer an opinion-- They're your kids. Raise 'em how you see fit. Put a helmet on 'em if you want to. You can even, GASP, put them in the front seat of your car....I really don't care. They're YOUR kids. Immunize them or don't-- they're your kids. Feed 'em tofu or Big Macs-- they're your kids. You raise yours. I'll raise mine. I
Reasonable people with sense KNOW what constitutes abuse-- we all know it when we see it. Feeding a kid a Twinkie doesn't quite cut it.
Amen0
This discussion has been closed.
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