Nudity - and your children
Replies
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I'm a mum of two boys (7 and 9 yrs) they quite often see me naked, getting dressed, showering etc. In an otherwise all male house, its quite good for them as they learn about the female body, without any hang ups. They both still run around completely naked after a bath, and don't think there is anything wrong. When they were very small we used to bath together, but I wouldn't do that now.
I'm also very honest in answering any questions they may have in a factual and age appropriate way. I always insist on proper terms for parts of the body, so that silliness doesn't start.
But this is very much a decision for each household to make. What is right for one won't be right for another. If you and your children feel confortable then its fine. If one or other parties start having a problem then maybe its time to reconsider.0 -
When my kids were little I did the same thing. No locked doors, period. If they need me I am available. Then my son got old enough to say "Mom!!!" and look the other way. Then you know its time.0
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I absolutely agree!
I also lived next door to a family where nudity was embraced. The parents walked around naked all the time. I know for a fact that their son grew up with no respect for women, and some very odd sexual ideas.
A kid doesn't have to see their folks naked to "embrace their own body and not be ashamed of it".I do it all the time with mine, even though I came from a culture to be naked in-front of anyone is a taboo, I think its good for kids in a way so they can embrace their own body and not be ashamed of it.
I don't believe that being naked in front of your kid has much, if anything, to do that at all. One can choose not to be naked in front of their kid, and still raise them as healthy human beings without hang-ups -- like me!
Oh my gosh! That's completely anecdotal, just like what I'm about to add is. I mentioned this in the public breastfeeding thread that some people thought went on way too long (um, have you ever tried NOT allowing your finger to act of its own accord when clicking on threads?) - my brother and I were raised around people who went nude - not just our single mother, but her friends as well. They would sunbathe nude, be in the sauna nude, etc. The kids would go swimming nude also, at least before physical changes happened. It was the teenagers who were often covered up (likely due to becoming comfortable with changes in your own body). My brother and I are not scarred (or have "odd sexual ideas" - of course, I don't know what your idea of "odd" is). My brother shows so much more respect for women than A LOT of guys I know. It's all cultural - and even in the U.S. there are subcultures. Certainly all the cultures around the world that are more open about nudity are not raising damaged children. While we may not be able to go nude, generally, in public in the U.S., it's not difficult to raise children in such as an environment as I was raised who can still present an acceptable level of "modesty" to the mainstream.0 -
If you want to change society, do it... just dont use your kids as a tool in the process...
Umm... isn't that how you change society's perspectives in the first place?
And who are you to tell someone what they can and can't teach their children?
mcdonl0 -
For all of the "puritanical" and "taboo" American comments...
Is there anything wrong with choosing to be modest as a parent, and avoiding being naked around them? I'm not talking about never teaching kids about their bodies, but what is wrong with being modest? It's a choice, and should be respected as much as the decision to allow nudity in the home.
Also, what harm is there in a society choosing not to allow public nudity -- even at the beach? Is anyone's rights really being infringed because they can't air out their cooter on the beach?
I'm fine with anyone making any choice they want to for themselves. When they start to make choices about what I am allowed to do with my life is when I have a problem.
As far as what harm is there when society doesn't allow nudity, well nudity does not mean completely naked all the time. Right now it could refer to a woman having her breasts exposed. Years ago it meant a woman was exposing too much elbow. In parts of the middle east today some women can't show anything more than their eyes.
You see a trend? Mostly it's men telling women their bodies are shameful and need to be covered up. I don't much care for it myself.
You do realize that your posts here and in the breastfeeding thread are far too logical, right?0 -
If you want to change society, do it... just dont use your kids as a tool in the process...
Umm... isn't that how you change society's perspectives in the first place?
And who are you to tell someone what they can and can't teach their children?
mcdonl
And... divine right... gave you the authority to tell me what to teach my kids??0 -
Double post0
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:laugh: you said "cooter".For all of the "puritanical" and "taboo" American comments...
Is there anything wrong with choosing to be modest as a parent, and avoiding being naked around them? I'm not talking about never teaching kids about their bodies, but what is wrong with being modest? It's a choice, and should be respected as much as the decision to allow nudity in the home.
Also, what harm is there in a society choosing not to allow public nudity -- even at the beach? Is anyone's rights really being infringed because they can't air out their cooter on the beach?0 -
Exhibitionism is considered overt sexual abuse, at least in the state of Oregon. Not my definition, theirs. I am in no way saying http://www.dhs.state.or.us/spd/tools/cm/aps/community/sex_abuse.pdf
I am in no way saying that this is all wrong, I simply stated my thoughts about it, and my experience.And saying that someone who was raised around his nude mom and dad, and is now sexually messed up, doesn't mean I'm saying that everyone who was raised like this is, or would be.I absolutely agree!
I also lived next door to a family where nudity was embraced. The parents walked around naked all the time. I know for a fact that their son grew up with no respect for women, and some very odd sexual ideas.
A kid doesn't have to see their folks naked to "embrace their own body and not be ashamed of it".I do it all the time with mine, even though I came from a culture to be naked in-front of anyone is a taboo, I think its good for kids in a way so they can embrace their own body and not be ashamed of it.
I don't believe that being naked in front of your kid has much, if anything, to do that at all. One can choose not to be naked in front of their kid, and still raise them as healthy human beings without hang-ups -- like me!
Oh my gosh! That's completely anecdotal, just like what I'm about to add is. I mentioned this in the public breastfeeding thread that some people thought went on way too long (um, have you ever tried NOT allowing your finger to act of its own accord when clicking on threads?) - my brother and I were raised around people who went nude - not just our single mother, but her friends as well. They would sunbathe nude, be in the sauna nude, etc. The kids would go swimming nude also, at least before physical changes happened. It was the teenagers who were often covered up (likely due to becoming comfortable with changes in your own body). My brother and I are not scarred (or have "odd sexual ideas" - of course, I don't know what your idea of "odd" is). My brother shows so much more respect for women than A LOT of guys I know. It's all cultural - and even in the U.S. there are subcultures. Certainly all the cultures around the world that are more open about nudity are not raising damaged children. While we may not be able to go nude, generally, in public in the U.S., it's not difficult to raise children in such as an environment as I was raised who can still present an acceptable level of "modesty" to the mainstream.0 -
If you want to change society, do it... just dont use your kids as a tool in the process...
Umm... isn't that how you change society's perspectives in the first place?
And who are you to tell someone what they can and can't teach their children?
mcdonl
And... divine right... gave you the authority to tell me what to teach my kids??
I dont recall telling you what to do at all. I simply said if you want to change society... do it yourself. If you children decide that they want to join in then let it be their decision. Relax.0 -
When it starts to bother him, he'll let you know. Until then, I wouldn't worry about it.0
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Some of the responses to this thread have made me giggle, really the human body is not nasty and scary and evil, and seeing one won't turn you into some depraved zombie! :bigsmile:
Sure, public nudity isn't appropriate, but in your own home what's the problem? Kids are perfectly capable of understanding that some things are okay with family but not okay with everyone else.
I remember when an American friend joined me at my gym here in England, she was HORRIFIED that the (women's) showers were communal, and tried to shower wearing her gym kit LOL
Haha, it's a parent's duty to embarrass their kids.When it starts to bother him, he'll let you know. Until then, I wouldn't worry about it.
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If you want to change society, do it... just dont use your kids as a tool in the process...
Umm... isn't that how you change society's perspectives in the first place?
And who are you to tell someone what they can and can't teach their children?
mcdonl
And... divine right... gave you the authority to tell me what to teach my kids??
I dont recall telling you what to do at all. I simply said if you want to change society... do it yourself. If you children decide that they want to join in then let it be their decision. Relax.
I'm not taking offense. I am merely trying to point out that changing society begins with what you teach your children. Children don't get to make choices for themselves until they are no longer children.0 -
Rad, huh?:laugh: you said "cooter".0 -
Rad, huh?:laugh: you said "cooter".
I have this customer that comes in to get work on his trailer done.. his name is Cooter. It cracks me up every time!0 -
Exhibitionism is considered overt sexual abuse, at least in the state of Oregon. Not my definition, theirs. I am in no way saying http://www.dhs.state.or.us/spd/tools/cm/aps/community/sex_abuse.pdf
I am in no way saying that this is all wrong, I simply stated my thoughts about it, and my experience.And saying that someone who was raised around his nude mom and dad, and is now sexually messed up, doesn't mean I'm saying that everyone who was raised like this is, or would be.I absolutely agree!
I also lived next door to a family where nudity was embraced. The parents walked around naked all the time. I know for a fact that their son grew up with no respect for women, and some very odd sexual ideas.
A kid doesn't have to see their folks naked to "embrace their own body and not be ashamed of it".I do it all the time with mine, even though I came from a culture to be naked in-front of anyone is a taboo, I think its good for kids in a way so they can embrace their own body and not be ashamed of it.
I don't believe that being naked in front of your kid has much, if anything, to do that at all. One can choose not to be naked in front of their kid, and still raise them as healthy human beings without hang-ups -- like me!
Oh my gosh! That's completely anecdotal, just like what I'm about to add is. I mentioned this in the public breastfeeding thread that some people thought went on way too long (um, have you ever tried NOT allowing your finger to act of its own accord when clicking on threads?) - my brother and I were raised around people who went nude - not just our single mother, but her friends as well. They would sunbathe nude, be in the sauna nude, etc. The kids would go swimming nude also, at least before physical changes happened. It was the teenagers who were often covered up (likely due to becoming comfortable with changes in your own body). My brother and I are not scarred (or have "odd sexual ideas" - of course, I don't know what your idea of "odd" is). My brother shows so much more respect for women than A LOT of guys I know. It's all cultural - and even in the U.S. there are subcultures. Certainly all the cultures around the world that are more open about nudity are not raising damaged children. While we may not be able to go nude, generally, in public in the U.S., it's not difficult to raise children in such as an environment as I was raised who can still present an acceptable level of "modesty" to the mainstream.
I appreciate you adding that clarification. But, exhibitionism by general definition is exposing one's genitalia to a stranger. While I didn't read the whole law you provided, I did not see that it provided a different definition of exhibitionism, so usually the law then follows with the most common definition, unless case law has defined it otherwise. So, nudity with those you know wouldn't fall under that definition and become sexual abuse.0 -
I'm not taking offense. I am merely trying to point out that changing society begins with what you teach your children. Children don't get to make choices for themselves until they are no longer children.
I guess I am of the opinion that when it comes to politics and social behavior I teach the baseline and let me children learn from there. I consider manners, modesty, respect and kindness to be a part of the baseline of social behavior.0 -
Is it this guy?
I have this customer that comes in to get work on his trailer done.. his name is Cooter. It cracks me up every time!
Rad, huh?:laugh: you said "cooter".0 -
I was tempted to make the obvious joke as well until I saw you in the modified Weaver stance with the semi-auto. So I'll pass and just say that the easiest thing to do is *not* bring it up at parties. Just one more thing for morons to talk about. Who needs it? HNY.0
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Growing up with one small bathroom I saw things. No big deal. As I grew older my parents were always consistant with how they got ready for work, etc. I learned, and chose for myself when I was uncomfortable with it and avoided it from then on. I am very modest around strangers but family is family. I don't have any kids yet (i'm trying) but I think they will choose for themselves when they are uncomfortable with it. I think they will be able to judge for themselves. Human bodies aren't disgusting just the way people treat them. I would never flaunt my body all over the place but I think it's ok to be naked in front of those who love and respect you.0
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Is it this guy?
I have this customer that comes in to get work on his trailer done.. his name is Cooter. It cracks me up every time!
Rad, huh?:laugh: you said "cooter".
LMAO! nope...but close! hahah0 -
Since everyone else is making their points by saying, "So and so did such and such," I'll add mine.
My parents and my best friend's parents were all friends. Both families were pretty open about nudity and such. I grew up very modest. I don't like to be nde or in underwear in front of anyone I'm not having sex with. My best friend will bare it all in front of anyone (in her own home).
Neither of us is perverted.0 -
Address, please?My best friend will bare it all in front of anyone (in her own home).0 -
we dont go flashing our "winkers" and "woo-woos" at our house but i cant tell you the last time I took a bath or a shower without a freaking audience. i honestly wish we had instilled boundaries just for the sake of I would like to go pee by myself in my own home.
I dont remember the exact age or what when my husband stopped undressing in front of our daughter. She is 11 now. However, I will continue to undress in MY room and if they are in there and happen to see my boobs well then GET OUT. They will start knocking and respecting people's privacy when they are tired of looking at their mommas butt cheeks!
My son is 5 and my daugther is 11. It doesnt bother them 1 bit. They are so gross.0 -
How much money you got? I have a price. I'm not ashamed.
Address, please?My best friend will bare it all in front of anyone (in her own home).0 -
Lol, me too!I envy your 5 year old son.
I have a 7 year old daughter who has still seen me naked around the house. She pays no mind to it and her mother and I have already spoken to her about the differences between male and females.
I'm sure eventually she'll get grossed out as all of us did when we thought about our parents being naked.
A.C.E. Certified Personal Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
I'm 27 years old, my brother is 25, our mom still comes out the shower naked and gets dressed in front of us when we visit. I think my brother and I came out pretty good and decent.......... Like someone said before, if it starts bothering him, he'll let you know.0
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The problem is with how a boob is viewed sexually. You guys were eating..........................and so was the baby. Nothing more.on the same subject , sort of, how about going out for a meal at the local pub today and a woman was breastfeeding her baby while we ate, surely she could have sat in a corner, but no, right in the middle of everyone, even my wife said she could have made an effort to protect herself from all the ogling young men
:noway:
A.C.E. Certified Personal Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
Winner!Good god...America is such a puritanical society. What is wrong with nudity and the human body? We were all born that way...
The only reason why being naked or being naked around your kids is perceived as wrong is because we've been taught that way. Why not teach your children that their bodies are a good thing, that being naked can be natural. Your kids will let you know when it is time for more modesty, and when they don't feel personaly comfortable.
A.C.E. Certified Personal Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
"winkers" and "woo-woos"
Another thing: we use the correct terminology in our house. Because when you're 16 and going to your first gynecological appointment and you've never referred to it as anything but a "woo-woo," it makes the doctor visit even more uncomfortable than it is to begin with. It took me YEARS to be able to say "vagina" without blushing. How ridiculous. Penis and vagina and breast are not dirty words. Why do we teach our children that they are?0
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