FUNNIES.....:) we all need a laugh!
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THATS A GREAT POST!! LOVED EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM!!!!0
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This one did it for me -- got me laughing out loud - very funny! (Thank you for sharing!)0 -
lmbo0 -
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im glad people are laughing!
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LONG BUT FUNNY!
Last week was my birthday and I didn't
feel very well waking up on that morning.
I went downstairs for breakfast
hoping my husband would be pleasant and say,
'Happy Birthday!',
and possibly have a small present for me.
As it turned out,
he barely said good morning,
let alone
' Happy Birthday.'
I thought....
Well, that's marriage for you,
but the kids....
They will remember.
My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast
and didn't say a word..
So when I left for the office,
I felt pretty low
and somewhat despondent.
As I walked into my office,
my handsome Boss Rick, said,
'Good Morning, lady,
and by the way
Happy Birthday ! '
It felt a little better
that at least someone had remembered.
I worked until one o'clock ,
when Rick knocked on my door
and said, 'You know,
It's such a beautiful day outside,
and it is your Birthday,
what do you say we go out to lunch,
just you and me..'
I said, 'Thanks, Rick,
that's the greatest thing
I've heard all day.
Let's go!'
We went to lunch.
But we didn't go
where we normally would go.
He chose instead a quiet bistro
with a private table.
We had two martinis each
and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office,
Rick said, 'You know,
It's such a beautiful day...
We don't need to go straight back to the
office,
Do We?'
I responded,
'I guess not.
What do you have in mind?'
He said,
'Let's drop by my place,
it's just around the corner.'
After arriving at his house,
Rick turned to me and said,
If you don't mind,
I'm going to step into the bedroom
for just a moment.
I'll be right back.'
'Ok.' I nervously replied.
He went into the bedroom and,
after a couple of minutes,
he came out
carrying a huge birthday cake ...
Followed
by my husband
my kids,
and dozens of my friends
and co-workers,
all singing 'Happy Birthday'.
And I just sat there....
On the couch....
Naked.
LMAO! Yes indeed it was funny!0 -
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Bump!0
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No matter how many times I see this, I still giggle.
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Hahahahahhahahahahaha
I loved this post
Jamie great Idea ^^0 -
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These are SO great! Thank you OP for starting this!0
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bumb cause some of these are really funny :laugh:0
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yur welcome 0
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I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married.
There was only one little thing bothering me...
It was her beautiful younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts, and generally was bra-less. She would regularly bend down when she was near me, and I always got more than a nice view. It had to be deliberate. Because she never did it when she was near anyone else.
One day her 'little' sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. Well, I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word.
She said, 'I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling,
just come up and get me.' I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.
Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping! With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and said, 'We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.'
And the moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car.0 -
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Hahahahahhahahahahaha
I loved this post
Jamie great Idea ^^ 0 -
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hahaha
:laugh: Kind of explains what happened around here last Halloween...0 -
I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married.
There was only one little thing bothering me...
It was her beautiful younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts, and generally was bra-less. She would regularly bend down when she was near me, and I always got more than a nice view. It had to be deliberate. Because she never did it when she was near anyone else.
One day her 'little' sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. Well, I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word.
She said, 'I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling,
just come up and get me.' I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.
Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping! With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and said, 'We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.'
And the moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car.
hahahahahaha!!0 -
Jamie, THANKS! I loved the Betty White one and the condoms in the car one!!!0
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I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married.
There was only one little thing bothering me...
It was her beautiful younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts, and generally was bra-less. She would regularly bend down when she was near me, and I always got more than a nice view. It had to be deliberate. Because she never did it when she was near anyone else.
One day her 'little' sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. Well, I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word.
She said, 'I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling,
just come up and get me.' I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.
Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping! With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and said, 'We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.'
And the moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car.
HAHA! That is horribly funny!!!0 -
Jamie, THANKS! I loved the Betty White one and the condoms in the car one!!!
yur so welcome! laughing is good for us! 0 -
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This thread is great! These are awesome!!!0
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LMFAO0 -
A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her.
One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 bill would fall out onto the sidewalk
Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."
"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them...thanks for telling
me officer."
"Well now, not so fast," said the cop. "Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it did you?"
"Oh,no,no" said the lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to the golf course. A lot of golfers come
and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off.
Kills the flowers you know. Then I thought, 'why not make the best of it?'
So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some
guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say 'OK buddy! Give me $20 or
it comes off!'
"Well, that seems only fair," said the cop laughing. "OK. Good luck! oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"
"Not everybody pays."0
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