Negative Comments on the Boards

caretheaton

When I first joined MFP, I was all about being active on the boards. Lately though, I have been laying low due to all of the negative posts and responses I have been reading.

Now let me by clear: by negative, I don't mean posting something that respectfully disagrees with another's post, or citing sources that refute someone's claim. If you think an OP was off on their facts, then it's perfectly acceptable to kindly steer them to some information that may be more helpful. But people are just getting down right mean and taunting. This is a place where all should feel free to come ask questions and share experiences. If you are one of those who makes fun of or is disrespectful in your replies, you should feel ashamed of yourself. You are nothing more than a bully and should leave the boards completely and forever.

If you feel the same way I do, let's ban together. We need to be heard louder than those with spiteful words. To me, this doesn't mean we attack those who are being out of line. It means we no longer stay silent. We need to counter-act their hurtful actions with loving and supportive actions of our own.

Who's with me!?

auticus

This is the internet. If you post on public message boards, you should have thick skin. If someone says something offensive to you, ignore them.

It's a shame MFP does not have an ignore option.

Wecandothis

I'm with you. I dropped out of the 'social' aspect of MFP some time ago, because it seemed like there was more snark than support. it can be turned around however.

metco89

I am with you on this! Spiteful and outright mean responses help no-one. This journey is often a struggle and we need positive reinforcement.

TheGoblinRoad

I agree with the OP. Humans are capable of respectful dialogue.

LaLa150

It's funny you're posting this...I literally JUST finished reading through a post that was 80% people being nasty and rude simply because they disagreed about the infamous "negative calorie foods". My mom always taught me that if you have nothing nice to say, then don't say anything at all. Some of these people need to speak to my mom.

MaximalLife

When I first joined MFP, I was all about being active on the boards. Lately though, I have been laying low due to all of the negative posts and responses I have been reading.

Now let me by clear: by negative, I don't mean posting something that respectfully disagrees with another's post, or citing sources that refute someone's claim. If you think an OP was off on their facts, then it's perfectly acceptable to kindly steer them to some information that may be more helpful. But people are just getting down right mean and taunting. This is a place where all should feel free to come ask questions and share experiences. If you are one of those who makes fun of or is disrespectful in your replies, you should feel ashamed of yourself. You are nothing more than a bully and should leave the boards completely and forever.

If you feel the same way I do, let's ban together. We need to be heard louder than those with spiteful words. To me, this doesn't mean we attack those who are being out of line. It means we no longer stay silent. We need to counter-act their hurtful actions with loving and supportive actions of our own.

Who's with me!?

If you see an inappropriate post, no need to form a union, report it.
Bullying and such is not tolerated here.

REPORT!

BrettPGH

This is the internet. If you post on public message boards, you should have thick skin. If someone says something offensive to you, ignore them.

It's a shame MFP does not have an ignore option.

IT DOES!

Every single person who complains that they don't like what people are saying has a wonderful option. They can set that person to ignore. Once they do that they need never see another post from that person.

Now if people know about this option, elect not to use it and still want to complain about what other people choose to say, well I have no sympathy for them.

HauteP1nk

No matter where we are in life we are going to be faced with people who have low self-esteems. To make themselves feel better they treat others like cr@p. These bullies are everywhere in life...at school, at work, at the gym, even on the internet. All we can do is ignore them and focus on the positive. The negative is just noise that we need to learn to drown out by focusing on the people that are kind hearted and positive.

mrsfoose

I get that this is the internet, but it's also supposed to be a supportive community. We're all trying to get in better shape. Being mean isn't the best way to do that. This is the main reason I sometimes think that I want to go to a site where I have to pay to be a member. But then I wouldn't have the awesome support from my friends on here.

Yanicka1

This is the internet. If you post on public message boards, you should have thick skin. If someone says something offensive to you, ignore them.

It's a shame MFP does not have an ignore option.

There is an ignore option here....just look at the little arrow under the avatar

beduffbrickie

couldnt agree more. Its getting a joke, since I have been on here it seems more people like to post rude comments just to wind other people up without even adding anything constructive to the thread they were replying too!

DaniellePF

I'm with you, and have been doing the same thing--laying low and not getting too involved in many threads. Some people like the drama, maybe? Not me. :glasses:

harley_rose

I agree, if you don't agree with my question/comments/ideas please be kind but not offensive about. We are all here for the same reason to lose weight, we are here for support..The world is full of negative people but here I would think our soul purpose and be supportive, if you need provide guidance then by all means provide the URL you got your information or other forum URL..

Be helpful, supportive.

agthorn

"If you think an OP was off on their facts, then it's perfectly acceptable to kindly steer them to some information that may be more helpful."

Except it's not even acceptable to do that; I'm about 99% off the main forums entirely because I lost track of how many times I was called rude, hateful, or unsupportive simply for pointing out that someone said something that was entirely factually wrong. Allowing wholly incorrect information to propagate is not supportive.

auticus - There is an ignore function. Next to everyone's user name in a forum thread there's a little arrow that will open a drop-down box, and the bottom option is "Ignore User".

fbmandy55

I am all about common decency but some people just have it coming. If you ask something and in all honesty want a real answer, I'll give a polite one. If someone asks a stupid, common sense question about dieting or a dangerous way to do it, they will probably get an earful.

MaximalLife

This is the internet. If you post on public message boards, you should have thick skin. If someone says something offensive to you, ignore them.

It's a shame MFP does not have an ignore option.

Actually, they do - IGNORE USER
There is a drop-down menu under our user name - and I have made use of this very feature for a number of toxic, sniveling people.

_Timmeh_

This is the internet. If you post on public message boards, you should have thick skin. If someone says something offensive to you, ignore them.

It's a shame MFP does not have an ignore option.

Actually they do have that option. Click the drop down arrow next to their name and hit Ignore User.
Agreed about the thick skin. Interwebs like real life is all flowers and cute bunnies.

Di3012

This is the internet. If you post on public message boards, you should have thick skin. If someone says something offensive to you, ignore them.

It's a shame MFP does not have an ignore option.

IT DOES!

Every single person who complains that they don't like what people are saying has a wonderful option. They can set that person to ignore. Once they do that they need never see another post from that person.

Now if people know about this option, elect not to use it and still want to complain about what other people choose to say, well I have no sympathy for them.

That's the problem though, many people do not know about that option.

How do you ignore somebody? I asked this the other day, but forgot what thread I asked it on lol.

SarahSwimmer

Haha I just finished reading sabout the "negative calories" too. Wonder if that's what the OP had in mind? Anyway, I think its best if we just stick to what we know works for us and state what we beleive as an oppinion or reference a source. That way we keep it as neutral as possible.

However, we are a community of hungry people, so some snark may be inevitable

Di3012

When I first joined MFP, I was all about being active on the boards. Lately though, I have been laying low due to all of the negative posts and responses I have been reading.

Now let me by clear: by negative, I don't mean posting something that respectfully disagrees with another's post, or citing sources that refute someone's claim. If you think an OP was off on their facts, then it's perfectly acceptable to kindly steer them to some information that may be more helpful. But people are just getting down right mean and taunting. This is a place where all should feel free to come ask questions and share experiences. If you are one of those who makes fun of or is disrespectful in your replies, you should feel ashamed of yourself. You are nothing more than a bully and should leave the boards completely and forever.

If you feel the same way I do, let's ban together. We need to be heard louder than those with spiteful words. To me, this doesn't mean we attack those who are being out of line. It means we no longer stay silent. We need to counter-act their hurtful actions with loving and supportive actions of our own.

Who's with me!?

I agree with you OP. Sometimes, often actually, I will type a reply and seriously think several times before I click "post" and many a time I have immediately regretted doing so.

engineman312

i try not to be rude, but don't say you want to be sexy in six weeks and then say that Instanity is too hard and you want something easy to do. i'll just laugh at you. and i'll laugh hard.

2jayjaysmom

You are correct...I just ignore the remarks I think are rude and make sure I post as much nice/positive stuff as I can...
You can always unfriend folks that you think are rude...

Having said that; remember this: hurting people do and say hurting things...Some folks are hurting inside and that ugliness has to come out (not making excuses for them)....
I gained weight do to some medical issues--some gained weight due to emotional ones, and that can make lower self esteem...therefore they are hurting...

You get the point...But don't give up and don't stop posting nice things there are still tons of us that get encouraged by positive words, even ones that are not directly to us....

IronmanPanda

It's funny you're posting this...I literally JUST finished reading through a post that was 80% people being nasty and rude simply because they disagreed about the infamous "negative calorie foods". My mom always taught me that if you have nothing nice to say, then don't say anything at all. Some of these people need to speak to my mom.

Funny I read that same post and the only person being consistently rude was the OP as she tried to defend herself from the fact she was wrong and then try and change her story and justify her "facts"

YassSpartan

Unfortunately stating an opinion in many cases will trigger a series of "YOU ARE WRONG BECAUSE YOU LOOKED IT UP IN WIKIPEDIA" type of response. Funny enough some, if not most of these people are far from being professionals in the topic being discussed but because whatever they did worked for them, they feel like they are right and you are wrong. This includes people who apparently are also in the fitness business, yet they reply with such nonsense answers that it really makes me question their knowledge and intelligence.

For that reason I decided not to post anymore in most topics discussed in the board and I feel like I should state my opinion, I'll probably contact the person directly just to avoid the stupid remarks from others.

TheGoblinRoad

Instead of having to click that ignore button arrow for each poster that's overly negative, wouldn't it make more sense for MFP to become the supportive community that it's intended to be?

You can click the ignore button after you've read a post/comment that you find offensive, but at that point, it's too late- the negativity has been planted in your head.

Acg67

Unfortunately stating an opinion in many cases will trigger a series of "YOU ARE WRONG BECAUSE YOU LOOKED IT UP IN WIKIPEDIA" type of response. Funny enough some, if not most of these people are far from being professionals in the topic being discussed but because whatever they did worked for them, they feel like they are right and you are wrong. This includes people who apparently are also in the fitness business, yet they reply with such nonsense answers that it really makes me question their knowledge and intelligence.

For that reason I decided not to post anymore in most topics discussed in the board and I feel like I should state my opinion, I'll probably contact the person directly just to avoid the stupid remarks from others.

Says the guy who posted videos about the alkaline diet

rainbowbow

This is the internet. Deal with it. People are going to say whatever they want and do whatever they want. If you do not agree with what they have to say- blow it off. Dont even bother reading. Only YOU can decide what can make you upset in your life.

If someone is blantantly bashing another user report it as it is against the forums rules and the moderators will take care of it.

Other than that...
Use MFP to track nutrion
lose weight
>--???
Profit

auticus

Oh good there is an ignore feature. Yayyy!!! Problem solved.

caretheaton

This is the internet. If you post on public message boards, you should have thick skin. If someone says something offensive to you, ignore them.

It's a shame MFP does not have an ignore option.

Not everyone has thick skin. Some people turn to these boards becasue they do not have people in their lives who support them through their fitness goals. When those people get bullied and hurt on here, they lose any support system they may have. Words can cause serious damage to someone's life. And un-provoked meanness is never acceptable, no matter where it takes place. I'm not saying we should form some sort of vigilante group that seeks to destroy the nay-sayers... I am saying that if you are here to HELP and SUPPORT people through their fitness goals, make your voice louder than those who are here to be cruel.

TheGoblinRoad

Not everyone has thick skin. Some people turn to these boards becasue they do not have people in their lives who support them through their fitness goals. When those people get bullied and hurt on here, they lose any support system they may have. Words can cause serious damage to someone's life. And un-provoked meanness is never acceptable, no matter where it takes place. I'm not saying we should form some sort of vigilante group that seeks to destroy the nay-sayers... I am saying that if you are here to HELP and SUPPORT people through their fitness goals, make your voice louder than those who are here to be cruel.

OP, you rock. Exactly this.