How to not cry when getting your *kitten* chewed??
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Usually you focus on what they're saying, not how they're saying it. Then you repeat it back to them. Example:
"I can't believe you didn't put the toilet paper back on the &#*$ing toilet paper roll AGAIN!"
"So what you're saying is, it would make you happy if I put the toilet paper on the toilet paper roll proactively, rather than wait for you to do it yourself."
Usually it calms them down. The only time I cry is when I know I've messed up, and during those times, you just get it out in the bathroom on the 5th floor or in the Starbucks bathroom next door.0 -
Any suggestions? I hate looking like a weak little girl when I get upset and cry when I get chewed out. I need to be strong and take it like a man! Lol, any suggestions???
It's simply a defensive response- it's not abnormal, but then- it's not productive either. It's difficult- but try not to be offended, even if the person IS doing it in a negative way. Take what you can from the (one-sided?) conversation- so you can learn from it. The two most important things are: 1) ADMIT your wrongdoing. Some bosses take delight in pointing out what people did wrong. Your owning up to your mistakes takes that away, shows you can take responsibility, and may lessen future *kitten* chewings. 2) Defend yourself if you are not entirely at fault. Don't be argumentative about it- just state the facts, and drop it if the argument escalates. When the other person calms down- they will likely see you are right. They may not apologize- but they probably won't hold it against you later.0 -
I sing songs to myself in my head.
Well, actually I change the words to something that makes fun of them in my head.
(e.g. "twinkle twinkle little star, what an annoying twit you are." - although mine are usually much more colorful in lyrics, but you get the point) When you find yourself starting to smile or giggle, bite your lower lip.
Also, never lose eye contact. It lets them know you're listening...and that you aren't intimidated.
I like the end part where they ask if you have any questions or comments. I just let loose a really big grin and say, "Nope!" and walk out. It kinda frustrates them.0 -
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do
LMAO.. hilarious0 -
I find naturally being a bit** prevents people from chewing your a** off as they are afraid of having theirs handed to them.0
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Think about something else.0
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Honestly, my tear ducts are hardwired to every emotion. I've learned that tears are apart of my life, but breathing and trying to find the message in the rant? Probably the best thing you can do.
:flowerforyou:
If it makes you feel better, I know plenty of manly men that tear up when there is a lot of emotion.0 -
Ask the person to STOP yelling and address you like an adult. People get treated like they allow themselves to be treated.0
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Omg i have the same problem! And i can't stand it. Luckily i have a nice boss now who never makes me cry, but would love to be able to control this too.0
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Yeah, I am in much the same situation today.0
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great advice0
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By asking how to "take it like a man" you're asking how not to be a grown, strong, awesome woman. I suggest putting on gloves and busting the glass ceiling.
You win. :flowerforyou:0 -
Wow, is sure need help with this one two...we need some suggestions from emotional females, not logical men!!
::facepalm::
I'm the most emotional man you'll ever meet in your life. However my emotions don't dictate my gender OR my behavior! Jeez! And they call MEN sexist...0 -
if its at work just think to yourself they are paying you for the *kitten* chewing. just nod and say "I wont let it happen again"0
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Any suggestions? I hate looking like a weak little girl when I get upset and cry when I get chewed out. I need to be strong and take it like a man! Lol, any suggestions???
This doesn't necessarily work while in the middle of getting chewed out, but find a hobby that gives you personal power (and a way to vent). Doing something that gives you personal power helps boost your self-esteem and makes it easier to deal with people *****ing you out.
If you can, you can also get yourself into a position within the company that makes you fire-proof (or at least fire-resistant), or realizing that you are more valuable to the company than you may have previously given yourself credit for. Doing that brings down the stakes of messing up (messing up, then, likely won't cost you your job), making those meetings more bearable, since you know you'll still have a job when you walk out.
During the meeting? Well, as the old British war posters used to say, "Keep calm and carry on."why is anbody allowing anyone to shout at them either in the workplace or in their personal lives?
Man up the lot of you.
just sayin'
Oftentimes, the person doing the shouting is also the same person that can fire you. In this economy, a hell-hole of a job is better than no job at all, which means putting up with the jerks. In a company that doesn't value its employees, or knows just how replaceable a given employee is, standing up to a boss, even a bully, can mean not having a job. For a lot of people, losing a job means financial ruin. When the stakes are that high, people don't feel they have a choice but to allow themselves to be doormats. Is it right? No, but it's life.
Also, some of us cry as a reaction to certain stressors, and even "manning up" still results in water works, regardless of how hard we work to suppress them, because it's more a physical/physiological reaction than anything else.0 -
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do
LOL...thanks I needed the laugh!!0 -
Wow, is sure need help with this one two...we need some suggestions from emotional females, not logical men!!
Wow, seriously? I'm actually quite offended that you just categorized all females as emotional vs men as logical. I'm sorry for you if that is your life, b/c I can assure you that I am QUITE logical.0 -
I have an easy cry reflex! I cry when people yell at me, when I'm happy, when I'm frustrated, when my boss praises me, etc. I find that deep breaths and speaking quietly help.0
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Wow, is sure need help with this one two...we need some suggestions from emotional females, not logical men!!
Wow, seriously? I'm actually quite offended that you just categorized all females as emotional vs men as logical. I'm sorry for you if that is your life, b/c I can assure you that I am QUITE logical.
indeed.0 -
why is anbody allowing anyone to shout at them either in the workplace or in their personal lives?
Man up the lot of you.
just sayin'
no one shouts at me ... an *kitten* chewing rarely involves shouting.0
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