Am I fat?

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teagin2002

I used to have an eating disorder when I was in High school and I was small. I actually saw other people who weighed more than me as smaller and more beautiful for some reason. I would be so surprised to find out how much they weighed. I didn't see myself as thin at all even though my collar bones and hip bones were protruding.

It is an illness and sadly no matter how thin I got I never saw myself as thin and everyone else around me was thin and beautiful but me.

Luckily I don't have that problem any more :flowerforyou:
I am loving my curves

jemachharo

I've always seen myself as smaller than I am. Then I catch my reflection in a mirror or window when I'm not expecting it (not holding in my belly and standing up tall) or see myself in a photo and think "Crap, am I really that big?"

stewsh

I am backwards. I think I look fine, even in my stupid size 16 pants, then I get a glimpse of myself in the bathroom mirror and realize I look horrible. I have convinced myself that I look better than I do and therefore, I don't work as hard to look good. I view others as fat (except the obviously skinny ones) and think I must look better than they do. I'm still unhappy with myself, but fake like I'm ok with it. I think I need a couch and a conversation about my mother

sarahgilmore

Regardless of her "number" Am I the only one who thinks the girl on the right is the sexiest?

The one in the middle is kinda, blah. Nothing exciting there, move on. And on the left - that's particularly UNappealing.

But I get that that is what a lot of women here are aiming for. And more power to them if that's what they want, it's just not my thing.
Does anyone else feel the same?


I see women my size (5'4", 170lb, NZ size 14-16 / US size 12-ish), or even a little bigger and think they look awesome. So many before pictures on the success board, I think, WHY? You looked better before!
I look at myself in the mirror and think I look GOOD. Sideways, a little improvement on the belly could me made, but otherwise, I'm happy being at the larger end of normal.

ahinski

I could strangle the person who started the misconception that people with eating disorders believe they are fat. I suffered from an eating disorder for many years (I am now 100% recovered). When I was at a healthy weight, I KNEW I was not fat, but I wanted to be thinner. When I was underweight, I KNEW I was underweight but wanted to be thinner. It was ALL about control, low self-esteem, and selfishness, but never actually about thinking that I was fat.

Only people with the very rare disorder called "Body Dismorphic Disorder" actually believe they are fat when they aren't.

Either way, why do you care if people with eating disorders think you're fat?

shebee25

My story is hauntingly similar. I was always teased growing up and called “skinny minny”. I used to drink a shake called ‘weight on’ because I wanted curves.

I always joke the ‘weight on’ shakes all caught up at once. I like you, never saw how big I was until I looked at pictures. I have a thyroid problem which contributed to my weight gain, along with having a child at 32.

It is a life change and it is forever. I am 5’7” and weigh 120 pounds (I have lost over 70 pounds) but I still feel I need to lose just 5 or 10 more. I know it sounds really crazy but everyday I get dressed I worry my clothes are going to be tight today. I too lacked the motivation and accepted being 'overweight' forever. I pray I never allow myself to get back to that place, I am a different person now, happier and definately more active. Best of luck with your success - I have been on this cahllenge for a year now and will never look back!

chulie

I am backwards. I think I look fine, even in my stupid size 16 pants, then I get a glimpse of myself in the bathroom mirror and realize I look horrible. I have convinced myself that I look better than I do and therefore, I don't work as hard to look good. I view others as fat (except the obviously skinny ones) and think I must look better than they do. I'm still unhappy with myself, but fake like I'm ok with it. I think I need a couch and a conversation about my mother

Amen about the conversation with my mother!!hahaha... I always grew up watching my mom criticize herself....complaining about her stomach being too big...if I came downstairs and asked my mom if I looked fat in something, she would say " If you think your fat, what does that make me?!?". My mother is a great woman who is as close to June Clever as any woman can come...but she had SERIOUS body issues....wanna guess what I am most critical about on myself??? My stomach of course....ironically the one area my mother always complained about.....I'm 5'9 and in my avatar pic I am the best weight I have ever been...150 lbs...but I was healthy, running and i FELT great....and even THEN I would STILL complain about my stomach!!!! I've had a baby 9.5 months ago and of COURSE the stomach issue is now magnified.....I want it gone...but the one thing I have learned is that I am going to DO something about it, not just complain about it...... I realize this is off topic but...I just had to comment on the mother comment..hahaha....I am NEVER going to use the word fat around my daughter...I don't want her growing up as unhappy with her weight at as I did....I am going to break the cycle and teach her to LOVE herself no matter how she looks and to not be SO critical of herself... when she asks me if SHE looks fat in something...I am going to tell her she is gorgeous and as long as she FEELS good and confident in herself...she can never look fat in something....unless it's phat with a p-h....hahahahahaha...

FlyByJuly

I still view my self as fat.

Uhmmm...helloooo. If that profile pic is you, I like the way you carry your fat. :happy:

1Timothy4v8

I have always thought that the phrase "I am fat / he is fat / they are fat" was one of those bad quirks of the english language that really did overweight people a lot of psychological harm.

No one IS fat.. It implies that the only thing that makes up their entire body is fat.

The TRUTH is none of us ARE fat... we all HAVE fat.. some more than others..
and the other truth is we are ALL 'skinny' in that, we all have skin....just like animals are hairy or furry, get it?

Think of a steak.. some are lean, and some have more fat.. perhaps marbled though, and perhaps just around the edge. Both are appealing to some, not appealing to others... but both have quality and value.

ok off my language soap-box for today!

Very well put ^^^^

aworkma6

Personally, I feel there is nothing wrong with being "fat". "Fat" is a word people have been using FOREVER to tear down other people. It is just a word. I identify as fat and own it. Fat is not a bad thing.

GreatSetOfBrains

I could strangle the person who started the misconception that people with eating disorders believe they are fat. I suffered from an eating disorder for many years (I am now 100% recovered). When I was at a healthy weight, I KNEW I was not fat, but I wanted to be thinner. When I was underweight, I KNEW I was underweight but wanted to be thinner. It was ALL about control, low self-esteem, and selfishness, but never actually about thinking that I was fat.

Only people with the very rare disorder called "Body Dismorphic Disorder" actually believe they are fat when they aren't.

Either way, why do you care if people with eating disorders think you're fat?

I don't care f they think I am fat. I was trying to discover how ppl with eating disorders view others. I'm just trying to understand how my friend can say she is fat, her words, when she also says she wants to be skinny like me. . I'm like 50lbs heavier. Just trying to understand.

cHaRlIe0411

When I was younger, I was slim (even now I can't refer to myself as "skinny") 5'7" and 115 pounds at 34-23-34. I thought I was a COW! Everyone else looked normal. My one friend who was exactly my size looked skinny. I mean, sure, if someone was really overweight, I saw them as fat, but didn't judge b/c I saw me in them. I am so much happier now to have a more realistic body image, but it is tough. I struggle with not obsessing over the ucky parts of me in the mirror. I will only sabotage myself. Good luck!

Cute ticker! Lol
My friend is 5'7 and wants to be skinny like me. I weigh 152 she weights 98. I just can't grasp that!

I don't understand... I'm 5'7 and weight 143.. with just a tiny amount of fat! I think the healthy weight for 5'7 is between 118 and 152...

InTheInbetween

I do. I see that others are not wearing clothes that fit them and they obviously are having trouble with portion control or eating the right kinds of food, or maybe even having no time to exercise.
At the same time, I fell into a trap of filling those moments for myself with excuses. So I went from being anorexic to a compulsive overeater to an exercise bulimic. Now, I'm recovering but somewhere inbetween them all.
I have channeled this feeling into wanting to help others -- so I plan to go to school for nutrition research and become a health coach of some kind. I think finding something in your life that benefits others instead of potentially sending out those negative thoughts as judgments (even if you don't say them, it can be felt) is a great way to transform "seeing others as fat."

^^^^ THIS THIS THIS THIS
I can't help but compare myself to EVERYONE I see and when I see someone who I think might be about my size I automatically start scrutinizing every little detail on them. It's not really about THEM though it's about ME . . . others are a mirror for how I see myself and I find myself inadvertently judging THEM as a means of bashing on myself. I look at another person and think "Do my thighs look like that? If they do then I'm really disgusting." or "She looks like she's about my size but oh my god then MY butt must look like that and that's gross!" It's a completely distorted way of thinking but it's entirely a reflection on how I perceive myself, not actually the person I'm looking at. :frown:

Selyan

I think I only see other people as they are. Maybe I notice the way other people look more than "normal persons" do, because I'm always comparing myself with everybody ele, but I don't think that people with a normal weight are fat.

umachanxo

I'm 5"7 weighing in at 148lbs. Measurements are 34-28-36 and I'd be lying if I didn't pick myself apart some days. But that doesn't mean that I view others as large or anything. I hardly pay attention to other people's weight, to be honest.

rawardle

People with eating disorders do not view others as fat. There image is completely distorted and they themselves look fat but others just look normal. I was anorexic (5'3, 71lbs at my lowest) and I always commented on how I wanted to be skinny like my friends who were just normal sized. It is an incredibly confusing disorder for regular people to understand.

WallyGirl358

Great picture. I thought I didn't really see myself as fat but I am between a 12-14 and I think I look bigger than the size 16 shown here. hmmmm Something to think about.

beach_chelle

I was always on the thin side growing up. I didn't know it till I was older and looked back. I never thought about my weight back then. I just accepted my body for what it was. I guess you could say I sorta took it for granted, After 2 kids, I snapped back to a size 4-6 without effort. But the ride was soon to end. I was on anti-depressants for 4 years, and even though I saw the weight coming on, I didn't care! I ignored it. That's part of what those awful pills do- they make you care less (I'll let the professionals explain that better). After a while it hit me that I didn't have much in my closet that fit me anymore. I'd see pics and be shocked at what I looked like! I joked to my Hubby that I had reverse anorexia. I didn't see the girl in the mirror that I saw in pictures. Now when I look at old pics, I kick myself for not doing anything to maintain what I had. BUT, I can't beat myself up forever. I can only move forward, which is exactly what I am doing.

I think I know what you mean, my inner image is skinnier than my outer one.

I also have a friend who has always been at a healthy weight but complained of her "fatness" I just tell her how great she looks and move on.

Karmynzahringer

I guess I had the opposite problem for awhile. It dawned on me one night when I went roller skating with a couple of girlfriends and our kiddos. I had not skated in years and was a little unbalanced when out of the blue this girl comes flying by and cut me off! I said to my girlfriend "that chubby girl just about knocked me over!!" Later on when I was taking off my skates, the same girl came over and sat on the bench near me to do the same, and I realized in horror that I was actually larger than her! When did this happen? I had always been thin with the exception of my pregnancies! I was mortified and I also felt shame for what I had said. Thats when I decided to make changes in my life. The weird thing is, several years before that, when I got down to 118 (very unhealthy looking for my height) I did not realize I was thin either, I still saw myself as average sized and would get so annoyed when people would comment that I had lost so much weight or looked unhealthy. Looking back they were right, but I did not CHOOSE to lose that weight, I lost it from having gallbladder issues for over a year undiagnosed and throwing up nearly every meal I ate. Either way I find it really difficult to have a realistic body image and maybe your friend doesn't see what you see!

beach_chelle

Regardless of her "number" Am I the only one who thinks the girl on the right is the sexiest?

The one in the middle is kinda, blah. Nothing exciting there, move on. And on the left - that's particularly UNappealing.

But I get that that is what a lot of women here are aiming for. And more power to them if that's what they want, it's just not my thing.
Does anyone else feel the same?


I see women my size (5'4", 170lb, NZ size 14-16 / US size 12-ish), or even a little bigger and think they look awesome. So many before pictures on the success board, I think, WHY? You looked better before!
I look at myself in the mirror and think I look GOOD. Sideways, a little improvement on the belly could me made, but otherwise, I'm happy being at the larger end of normal.

No I agree she is by far the sexist. That would actually be my ideal body:laugh:

Karmynzahringer

Great picture. I thought I didn't really see myself as fat but I am between a 12-14 and I think I look bigger than the size 16 shown here. hmmmm Something to think about.

I have to agree, I am a size 9/10 and I definitely think I look bigger than the size 16 through the midsection at least, but I think a lot of people carry their weight better than others, and I think that picture does not depict a realistic size 16. No loose skin, or trouble zones really... If she is a size 16 then she carrys it VERY well or is very tall. I would guess her more of a 12, and the middle more of an 8...

Karmynzahringer

Got this from Facebook

I am larger (always has been) than the "National Average"

There is no way that woman is a size 12.

...Is there?? O.o

Maybe size 12 in a wedding dress...

I'm a size 8 and I am not nearly that slim.

I agree!

mg720

I still view my self as fat.

Wow! Really? I wish I was half as fat as you

Weighing over 300 pounds will get you like that.

I understand, even when I've trimmed down, I still feel "big"

agree with both, when you go through such a transformation it takes some time for your mind to sort of catch up and to view yourself differently. This is something I have been struggling with lately but i am finally begining to feel comfortable in my own skin

EmCarroll1990

I wouldn't say I have an "eating disorder", but my mother's convinced I have BDD. I don't view people at my weight fat, or heck I don't even view people that are a bit heavier (50 or so lbs) than me as fat. It's all personal and all internal, has nothing to do with other people. I still have issues with it and am struggling to get to a weight where I am comfortable. And I've actually recently stopped talking with outside people (certain family members, and friends) about my wanting to lose weight because I'm just exhausted with the whole "Oh, you don't need to lose weight, you look fine." "Where are you even going to lose weight from?!" I'm just glad my fiancé and my mom understand my side.

Fruit_Girl

Right now I am 96 pounds, I have 32-23-29 figure, and I see my self as huge and fat. It's called body distortion eating disorder, I have it as well as anorexia.

merzback

Got this from Facebook

I am larger (always has been) than the "National Average"

I think the extremely thin one is a 2, the next one is a 6, and the "big" one is about a 10-12.

There is no way that woman is a size 12.

...Is there?? O.o

Maybe size 12 in a wedding dress...

I'm a size 8 and I am not nearly that slim.

I agree!

EmCarroll1990

Right now I am 96 pounds, I have 32-23-29 figure, and I see my self as huge and fat. It's called body distortion eating disorder, I have it as well as anorexia.

At 15, you actually should not be on this website.

Karmynzahringer

I have a friend that is a size 0, and always has been, hell after having her first child, she left the hospital in her pre pregnacy jeans. I have always been taller/larger than her. She is one of those people that constantly judges those she doesn't like. I would get so annoyed because at one point when I was around a size 6-8 we were out at the bar and a girl she didn't like was there (I think she was honestly jealous of her because she was getting attention from a certain male) Either way, she kept going on an on about that "fat" ***** and even later on was talking about how if this guy wanted a fat girl over her it was his loss yada yada. Finally I told her that I was upset because that girl was right around my size and I felt like it was an indirect diss on me. She looked at me and said "no way! You are way skinnier than her, and you are NOT fat!" ......... Now where is the logic there, and does it seem weird that you would have a realistic view of yourself, and your friends, but a skewed view of people that you don't like...