Angry Deleted Fitness Pals?
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Ive only deleted people who have driven me crazy by treating it like FB or Twitter. I dont mind a lot of posts if its about food, exercise, motivation etc, but just general crap just annoys me. Ive only ever deleted 2 people. If someone has deleted me (not that ive noticed but you never know!!), then I just think that not everyone always gets along. I may annoy them! Buts its up to them, like it was up to me.
COULDNT AGREE MORE!!!!0 -
Nobody likes rejection. They felt hurt by getting deleted. MFP should have an option to disable the status updates of selected people from appearing in your news feed like Facebook. So they are just ignored.0
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:noway: :laugh: 0 -
lol. I was about to ask you. Unless they message you. I have no idea how you 'd know.How do you know someone deleted you and who it was? Sorry if this is a stupid question. :ohwell:
I only keep a small list of friends. When I got to 60 pals, that was to much for me. Right now I only have 46 pals and I we all interact with each other. They are noticed when the aren't active. I've only been deleted twice and didn't question their reasoning's; I just kept it moving.0 -
You honeslty believe I am worried about someone deleting me, when I got 450lbs on my back? This is the Internetz, worry about something real. For example accomplishing your fitness goals for 2012.0
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That's childish! I don't know why people get their panties in a twist about it. It's an online forum. Big deal. Sure, we're "friends" on here and if that goes any further, cool beans! I'm always down to meet new people. Especially if it's to work out or get together and do something fun. Example, our Miami group. I will most likely meet those people face to face and that's fine with me. I look forward to it! BUT if someone, even if I have met them, decides they no longer need my friendship, then so be it. There loss!
While I don't delete anyone, I do keep an eye on who I add. On another forum, a girl added me, sent me a message that she was trying to get a bunch of girls from the same area to buy a pole fitness package so we could get the group rate. I was all for it. We chit-chatted back and forth for a few days, took the class, and even signed up for the next class on the same night. I thought she was cool. It turns out, she was using my information, name, username, pictures and my bio on my page to sign up for dating sites! A friend of mine who was on there saw my picture and was freaking out because he knew my boyfriend at the time. Try explaining that one to a jealous boyfriend LOL We ended up emailing the customer service people and explained to them that it wasn't me. The CSR gave me the email that was used when the person signed up. I thought it looked familiar. So the next time I went to the pole fitness class, I looked at the sign in sheet from the first class because it asks for name, number and an email to receive discounts and group coupons. Sure enough, her name, her cell, her email! So I obviously confronted her psycho *kitten* and told her she was out of her damn mind to be using my info to meet guys on the net because she didn't even REMOTELY look like me! Needless to say, she didn't come back to the classes and her IP address was blocked from Match.com.
Thank God my MFP friends are AMAZING :happy: And none have stalker, psycho like tendencies, at least from what I can tell
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As my journey and goals change so does my friends so I delete those who are on a totally different page than me. It makes sense to me to have pals that do similar things that I do. I do heavy strength training, practice bodybuilder on season diets, and go hard on cardio days. If you are eating what ever you want but in moderation (or so you think moderation), doing laundry and light house keeping, and logging it as a workout, We Don't relate. If you are using this as a facebook and making off the wall comments, We Don't relate. So I will delete you!0
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Unless they're also your friends in real life, who even cares? Some people take the internet waaaay too seriously...
Agreed. I think maybe I'm using MFP incorrectly because there is no one on my friend list (with the exception of my sister and the friend I joined with) who I know well enough or on a deep enough level to ever have an emotional stake in whether they keep me on their list or not. If they delete me, I assume...actually, I don't assume anything. It just doesn't matter.0 -
People really get cranky when you delete them? Wow, kudos to my friends for being drama-free, I guess! I might notice if my number of friends dropped, but I probably wouldn't go out of my way to find out who. I figure if someone deletes me they have their reasons, no big deal. I'm not a heavy hitter at the gym or a big cheerleader, but I try to give kudos for a job well done and comment on a status that strikes me.
I've seen people get bashed on walls' over being deleted. In my experience, a lot of people like to throw rocks while they live in their glass house.0 -
Crazy! If I've been deleted and noticed and its upset me, I try to send a polite message as to ascertain why. If I don't hear back, that's cool, I'm not gonna lose sleep over it or get really upset and angry. So yeah, that's going too far!0
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We are here to support each other NOT friend collect. If you can't be supportive and encouraging you're going to be deleted and honestly I could care less if you talk crap. I am better than that and don't need or want people like that in my life. I am on here to be a positive influence for people and expect the same in return. This isn't facebook or myspace so grow up people!0
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This just reminded me of a situation that happened the other week. I got a friend req from a fairly new person with a similar starting weight to my own, and a message with it asking what I had done to lose my weight. I accepted the request, sent a fairly long reply saying what I do, but also mentioning that as our domestic situations were quite different that I wasnt sure my methods would work for her. It occurred to me a few days later that I hadn't had a reply, and when I looked, she had deleted me without even replying to my message. Now, whilst I did think that this was a tad rude, it never occurred to me to send another message or question why she had deleted me. I figured that my methods obviously didn't appeal to her, or my diary, or whatever. At the end of the day it's everyones choice who they have on their lists, and everyone has to do whatever works for them.0
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Amen!0
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The easiest way to deal with people is to ignore them. If you aren't giving them the reaction they are looking for, then they aren't succeeding at agitating you. Don't feed the trolls!!0
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This just reminded me of a situation that happened the other week. I got a friend req from a fairly new person with a similar starting weight to my own, and a message with it asking what I had done to lose my weight. I accepted the request, sent a fairly long reply saying what I do, but also mentioning that as our domestic situations were quite different that I wasnt sure my methods would work for her. It occurred to me a few days later that I hadn't had a reply, and when I looked, she had deleted me without even replying to my message. Now, whilst I did think that this was a tad rude, it never occurred to me to send another message or question why she had deleted me. I figured that my methods obviously didn't appeal to her, or my diary, or whatever. At the end of the day it's everyones choice who they have on their lists, and everyone has to do whatever works for them.
something similar happened to me. Someone sent me a FR with a note saying "we have a lot of goals in common (or something to that affect, though I have no idea how that would be known, since my page is now private, but ok...). So, I accepted the request and went to say hi and said "so, we have goals in common? You compete, too? Nice to meet you." Before I could click back to my wall, I was deleted. Oh well, moving on....0 -
So true, it shouldn't be that serious. If you get deleted, get over it, if you need a reason why, ask and keep it moving.0
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Hey, I know a great way to address the situation in a mature way and extinguish the fire at the same time, a public post!0
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I signed up for MFP for myself...when I first joined I didn't even know you could have "friends" on here! I have a few now, but when it comes down to it I am still here for ME. If I make friends along the way great, if not I have lots of them in real life.
^^^This for me also^^^0 -
Nobody likes rejection. They felt hurt by getting deleted. MFP should have an option to disable the status updates of selected people from appearing in your news feed like Facebook. So they are just ignored.
On your page, if you put your cursor in the upper right hand corner of someone's post the word "Hide" appears. I used that to hide one guy who liked to talk about banging his wife.0 -
You honeslty believe I am worried about someone deleting me, when I got 450lbs on my back? This is the Internetz, worry about something real. For example accomplishing your fitness goals for 2012.
WELL SAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! plain and simple be about you and handle your weight lost journey!!!0 -
one time I had a TON of excess friends whom I didn't have time to catch up with as I like to do and so I deleted the ones there was no interaction with and shortly after one of the ones who were deleted (due to NO interaction ever, even after I went to say hi after she requested me) she fires off his ABSURD post about what an egotistical, self-centered, arrogant, celebrity wanna be I was who thought entirely way too highly of myself and I needed to get over myself, because I'm a good for nothing nobody and never will be. Not at all immature or lame.0
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Nobody likes rejection. They felt hurt by getting deleted. MFP should have an option to disable the status updates of selected people from appearing in your news feed like Facebook. So they are just ignored.
On your page, if you put your cursor in the upper right hand corner of someone's post the word "Hide" appears. I used that to hide one guy who liked to talk about banging his wife.
at least it was his wife and not someone else's... why not just delete, instead of hiding?0 -
Hmm. May be they were upset because they felt used. Once you reached your goal or changed your goal, they were no longer needed. I personally don't think that is what support is all about. If we are pal and support each other, it should happen both ways. Unless, I do something foul to you or I am not being supportive by all means delete me. However, deleting me because I am not where you are on the journey is not friendly in my opinion. I am so glad that I have the mindset of "oh well!" If I was your friend and you deleted me, I would have been like "oh well" and moved on. I have connected with some great people here but, my success or motivation is not determined by a few comments here or there. My take is more power to you.0
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Definitely a handful you said there MEL!!! I am one that experience this....I get alot of Lash outs, Hate emails, HATERS, among deletions....I have learned from You along with others here that with doing the right things,..comes people that want to see you fail...I WILL NOT....I am here for ME and I enjoy helping others and when there is foolishness I HAVE a choice to Delete People or be deleted if they don't connect with me...END of story!!! I have gained friends and that's A plus but at the end of the day...It's Stephanie Journey!! Those don't like it Keep Hating from a far!!0
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I've deleted people because they never interact with me. I have numerous of times supported them, say hi etc and never not once have they return the favor. Then I go and delete them. I pretty sure I've been deleted as well by others, which my very first MFP friend deleted me, but that's ok I can't get mad at that. She needs to do what's best for her
I like to interact with my friends regarding health related topics and just everyday life topics. As long as the support continues I love to read about how people's day went etc. Everyone should be mature about things
You look SO much like my bestfriend that I grew up with! Awww I miss her now. =(
I joined sometime in January this year and I had no idea there was a forum and that you could add friends either. I have accepted every friend request I get and added a few people that I feel i have things in common with. so far all of my MFP friends have been so great and supportive. I also love reading their successes and daily lives and I find them all inspiring.
If I ever get deleted, it might hurt a bit, but i would never go out of my way to make someone feel miserable.0 -
People really get cranky when you delete them? Wow, kudos to my friends for being drama-free, I guess! I might notice if my number of friends dropped, but I probably wouldn't go out of my way to find out who. I figure if someone deletes me they have their reasons, no big deal. I'm not a heavy hitter at the gym or a big cheerleader, but I try to give kudos for a job well done and comment on a status that strikes me.
I've seen people get bashed on walls' over being deleted. In my experience, a lot of people like to throw rocks while they live in their glass house.
*shrug* This whole thread has me shaking my head. The friend exclusivity thing baffles me, but hey, whatever works for you. I cam understand not wanting thousands of friends. Maybe I just haven't been around ling enough. I have friends who are in peak or close physical condition, while I was until recently a total couch potato. Seeing what they do encourages me to try harder and do more. Hopefully they don't feel like I drag them down somehow by not being as active.
I friend people who interest me, and I have yet to turn down a friend request (though of course I will if I ever get the 'creep' vibe). But I also wouldn't take being deleted as an affront to my personality. It's a highly facte website with thousands of users, FFS! They're not ALL going to like me 0 -
Hey, I know a great way to address the situation in a mature way and extinguish the fire at the same time, a public post!
:laugh: You mean hashing it out in public isn't going to make it alllll better??0 -
I accept all requests and then never read my news feed (or post much to it either). I've got some MFP groups I belong to that I get (and give) support from so the news feed isn't a major source of support for me. For one thing, MFP posts too much inane stuff automatically to make it really worth while.
Plus, if I read my news feed, I have to restrain myself constantly from posting things like "Um, no, you did not burn 1000 calories walking your dog for 30 minutes, you just didn't." :laugh:0 -
To OP:
You Rock!!! You don't need the drama. Sorry you've had to put up with a bunch of flack.
It's a shame ppl have to act that way over little things.
I delete ppl if they haven't been on in awhile (a month or longer).
I once deleted a person that had been gone awhile. They returned to MFP & messaged me
to let me know they were back and asked me to re-add them. It was a cool message. 0 -
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at least it was his wife and not someone else's... why not just delete, instead of hiding?
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True. I'd probably delete for unabashed adultery. I didn't delete because he said for the beginning that he was a colorful guy. I just didn't realize how colorful. :blushing: I don't care if someone deletes me, but I generally don't delete others. I just remove them from my feed if I'm not interested in what they're saying.0
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