Angry Deleted Fitness Pals?

garita93

Not sure what to really say about all of this. It is a tool to help yourself, if it isn't helping you or you feel defeated then something needs to change like removing people who are making you feel defeated. With that said this information is only as accurate as the person makes it be. If you aren't honest in what you are really doing then what is the point of being on here in the first place? I just joined yesterday and have found the food and exercise trackers awesome. But drama is going to be everywhere, you just have to learn how to filter (deleting) in order to make it work for you because it is all about you, no one else! Encouraging words are great but let's face it, without them we would still need to choose to do this with or without support.

shanlynt

I have no problem deleting. Save the drama for your mama.

Kenzietea2

I will delete you if you don't interact, and I wouldn't care if you deleted me for the same reason. Maybe it would teach me a lesson I won't get mad.

DS67ATX

I tend to delete people that do not respond to my comments or profile after a certain period.Nothing personal but I try to respond to everyone and give support to all my friends on here so I kinda expect some of the same,not everyday but at least every few days.

teagin2002

I delete people for different reasons:
1. I can not support them, they are choosing to use my advice to starve themselves or hurt themselves.
2. I just don't feel much of a connection with them.
3. I don't know who they are and it has been 2 months.
4. if they stop logging in after 2 weeks I do delete them.
5. if my friends list gets too big and I know I can not support so many, I will have to delete a few.
6. this is the only time I have ever mentioned someone on my wall after deleting them, if they absolutely hurt my feeling by calling me something inappropriate and infringing on my right to put up what ever pics I want in my profile.
This person made such a big deal of it for weeks, I don't understand what the hell he was thinking and I am glad that is over.

I don't usually send something before I delete people and yes I do get messages afterwards, some are not very pleasant and others are just asking what happened.

I have had times where I didn't delete anyone and they send me a message asking me why I have deleted them. With these I usually just add them back unless I know I can not support them and I have reached my limit of people I can support.

jackpotclown

Maybe there should be an app called this....the character picture of the offended is hurled to knock over the walls of insecurity

NeshBeMe

Hmm. May be they were upset because they felt used. Once you reached your goal or changed your goal, they were no longer needed. I personally don't think that is what support is all about. If we are pal and support each other, it should happen both ways. Unless, I do something foul to you or I am not being supportive by all means delete me. However, deleting me because I am not where you are on the journey is not friendly in my opinion. I am so glad that I have the mindset of "oh well!" If I was your friend and you deleted me, I would have been like "oh well" and moved on. I have connected with some great people here but, my success or motivation is not determined by a few comments here or there. My take is more power to you.

I don't think I could have said this^^^^ better. PREACH SISTA!!!! LOVE, LOVE, LOVE THIS!!!

kimoRUN

you mean MFP doesn't = Best Friends Forever? :sad:

OneBKDiva

AMEN!! AMEN!! AMEN!! It's sad that this happens because this is the place where people do not want to feel like they are being judged. This is not a place for jealousy because we all are in the making of our body being (excuse me) THE ISH!!!! Chuck up the deuces!! Peace to the haters!!

2hungariangirls

delete them, then block them. simples.

How do you block?

SexyCook

The easiest way to deal with people is to ignore them. If you aren't giving them the reaction they are looking for, then they aren't succeeding at agitating you. Don't feed the trolls!!

This definitely works....

meagalayne

you mean MFP doesn't = Best Friends Forever? :sad:

You're reading this all wrong. MFP absolutely = BFF. Get your stories straight.

mrstotal180

Just Keep It moving!

mrstotal180

Hmm. May be they were upset because they felt used. Once you reached your goal or changed your goal, they were no longer needed. I personally don't think that is what support is all about. If we are pal and support each other, it should happen both ways. Unless, I do something foul to you or I am not being supportive by all means delete me. However, deleting me because I am not where you are on the journey is not friendly in my opinion. I am so glad that I have the mindset of "oh well!" If I was your friend and you deleted me, I would have been like "oh well" and moved on. I have connected with some great people here but, my success or motivation is not determined by a few comments here or there. My take is more power to you.

Well Said!!!!

friendlyvirgo

I just noticed that I was deleted. Well...I add people for motivation, advice, tips and to learn from others how to reach my goal. I'm not here for drama, gossip or to put anyone down. Dieting is not easy on everyone. Some people catch on quickly and some don't. And I think forums like this only make others feel down and discourage. I wish everyone the best! We're all on our own journey.

tiptoeketo

Nobody likes rejection. They felt hurt by getting deleted. MFP should have an option to disable the status updates of selected people from appearing in your news feed like Facebook. So they are just ignored.

Yes! I've tried to do this to several pals who had dramatic posts and ended up accidentally deleting them. Oops!

garita93

I just noticed that I was deleted. Well...I add people for motivation, advice, tips and to learn from others how to reach my goal. I'm not here for drama, gossip or to put anyone down. Dieting is not easy on everyone. Some people catch on quickly and some don't. And I think forums like this only make others feel down and discourage. I wish everyone the best! We're all on our own journey.

I am with you 100%!

spennato

Meh. I don't think I care enough. I know why I am on here, if you want to show support, your gone. That easy.

Wait so if some one shows support you delete them?

stevenleagle

Miss QT

I read this thread with a lot of curiosity and I have to say found it very interesting.

I don't always look at people's profiles but I could not help to check yours out - which is a very interesting read.

First of all, let me start by saying you appear to be a truly focussed, inspirational individual. That youtube video of you doing squats in nothing less than outstanding. Your aspirations are commendable.

I note that you have a men only rule for friends.

Dare I say it, this thread will probably make it MORE likely that a lot of blokes will want to friend you. Who can resist the fact that you are not only strong physically but also intellectually interesting?

Don't worry though - I won't try to invite you and certainly cannot understand anyone being angry at you (perhaps they are angry at themselves for letting you go lol?)

Seriously though - back on topic - I have rarely deleted mfp friends so don't really know what the fuss is about. I have probably deleted a few who have not been active and - dare I say it - may have inadvertently deleted a few too. No one has ever complained. And a few people (although surprisingly - and pleasingly - only a few) have deleted me. Of course I have never had any hard feelings - people are entitled to pick and choose who they want to be mfp friends with - just as real life.

Thing is this though: I like keeping a diverse set of mfp friends. I don't want friends who are all like me. I feel that all my friends are unique and have their own talents. I like reading about friends who constantly hit their goals. I also like reading about friends who are struggling because to me anyone who says they have never struggled is not being truly honest. I like reading about the different goals and achievements of my friends. Yes I have a growing list, but they all inspire me and I feel that I (sometimes) inspire them in my own way (even when I am struggling!)

Just like in my real life job (as a lawyer) I enjoy interacting with different people. It keeps my life challenging and rewarding. I try to always accept people as they are and find inspiration in everyone (irrespective of their current situation or struggles). I firmly believe that acknowledging people is very important. Therefore I make this suggestion to you (and everyone who has angry deleted friends). If you wish to delete a person, tell them why. Honestly and sincerely. Tell them what you like about them as well as why you are letting them go. It could be a simple reason such as a huge friend list. Or the fact that they are on not on your wavelength. It is important to recognise that everyone's self esteem is important.

Good luck Miss QT. Honesty and integrity (as per your chosen career) is very important. So is empathy which you clearly have too. Just remember to communicate that empathy to your mfp friends and you will be fine

pinuplove

Steven, your post makes entirely too much sense to be in this thread!

weightloss12345678

Whats the point......... its only MFP, if someone deletes you then o well nothing to cry about

Hell if someone deletes me, I wont loose no sleep over it unless they borrowed $5 from me and still owe

CorinthiaB

Whats the point......... its only MFP, if someone deletes you then o well nothing to cry about

Hell if someone deletes me, I wont loose no sleep over it unless they borrowed $5 from me and still owe

I love it!

jfox625

I think it's really bad karma to delete people but if someone deletes me? They weren't worth having anyway. Life is too short to judge or be judged. Last I heard that wasn't my job anyway.

Package02

Or when someone just tries to add you in general and you decline them? Sorry, I did not read in the MFP rules just because someone request to be your friend you have t oadd them. I personally have only females on my friends list.. except one. So when a guy tries to add me I decline. I have had 3 diffrent instances where I got a rude email back. Sorry but nothing against you, just my personal preference to have females only.

I believe it's under section seven, paragraph three "you must blindly approve all friend requests" It's even in bold lettering

I don't see what the big deal is though. It's like on facebook how I see my "friend" number change on a daily basis. Whether it's someone deleting me or deactivating their account, it doesn't matter to me. I don't bother to try and figure out who it was. Personally though, I don't delete anyone just because I really don't care whether they're on my friends list or not. Doesn't hurt me to leave them on. They can delete me if they want though.