a question mostly for guys and totally not mfp related

Options
1235»

Replies

  • sarahc001
    sarahc001 Posts: 477 Member
    Options
    No offense to the OP, you seem like a very nice person in your responses but I'm curious as to why you appear to be upset that you aren't always the one that gets hit on. Especially as you are already married. It seems that you're somewhat competitive with your girlfriends and used to being the most attractive and getting the most attention. And then not happy when you don't. Maybe sometimes to some men you're not the most attractive? Be happy for your friends instead.
    I hope this doesn't sound harsh but honestly this is what came to my mind as was reading.

    My thought exactly as I read this whole thread....Obsessing about why men buy your friends drinks and don't hit on you when you're married...I can't even imagine that you would want to deal with that sort of crap. If a guy showed so much lack of respect for me and my relationship to buy me a drink when I was clearly wearing a wedding ring, I'd personally be pissed.
  • bigredhearts
    bigredhearts Posts: 428
    Options
    As for this tactic, I would find it dumb, I mean because why would you hit on someone's friend to talk to them. In theory i could see someone trying this, but all it would show is that when yall met he was hitting on your friend LOL. (I know you are married so I am unsure the caring in this, but if someone was single) I do agree that maybe your friends are being more flirtatious or deceiving in their demeanor to make guys think they have a chance..and then the guy realizes he was dumb cause they are faithful and married and maybe he should waste his money on a girl without a ring on her finger:wink:

    right?! lol... i would be ok with the free drink and then the realization :) lol... or even just for dudes to stop actin like im freakin poison lol
  • bigredhearts
    bigredhearts Posts: 428
    Options
    No offense to the OP, you seem like a very nice person in your responses but I'm curious as to why you appear to be upset that you aren't always the one that gets hit on. Especially as you are already married. It seems that you're somewhat competitive with your girlfriends and used to being the most attractive and getting the most attention. And then not happy when you don't. Maybe sometimes to some men you're not the most attractive? Be happy for your friends instead.
    I hope this doesn't sound harsh but honestly this is what came to my mind as was reading.

    My thought exactly as I read this whole thread....Obsessing about why men buy your friends drinks and don't hit on you when you're married...I can't even imagine that you would want to deal with that sort of crap. If a guy showed so much lack of respect for me and my relationship to buy me a drink when I was clearly wearing a wedding ring, I'd personally be pissed.

    its kind of an assumption to say that my question is any sort of obsession... but, i guess if thats how you look at it, to each their own :happy:
  • kimtpa1417
    kimtpa1417 Posts: 461 Member
    Options
    You must be flashing off your vibes of being taken and not realizing it. (So my bf says) i personally dont like guys buying me drinks as I have been drugged twice.
  • sarahc001
    sarahc001 Posts: 477 Member
    Options
    No offense to the OP, you seem like a very nice person in your responses but I'm curious as to why you appear to be upset that you aren't always the one that gets hit on. Especially as you are already married. It seems that you're somewhat competitive with your girlfriends and used to being the most attractive and getting the most attention. And then not happy when you don't. Maybe sometimes to some men you're not the most attractive? Be happy for your friends instead.
    I hope this doesn't sound harsh but honestly this is what came to my mind as was reading.

    My thought exactly as I read this whole thread....Obsessing about why men buy your friends drinks and don't hit on you when you're married...I can't even imagine that you would want to deal with that sort of crap. If a guy showed so much lack of respect for me and my relationship to buy me a drink when I was clearly wearing a wedding ring, I'd personally be pissed.

    its kind of an assumption to say that my question is any sort of obsession... but, i guess if thats how you look at it, to each their own :happy:

    Yep, for me a "free drink" isn't worth unwanted advances, and I don't need or expect attention from men when I'm out with my friends. If I were single, maybe it would be another story, but I am a little surprised that a married woman would care.

    Yet you're right; to each their own...
  • grinch031
    grinch031 Posts: 1,679
    Options
    I'm a married guy and I like getting hit on by women. It happens once every 2 years or so, but man is it a confidence booster.
  • MrDude_1
    MrDude_1 Posts: 2,510 Member
    Options
    I'm a married guy and I like getting hit on by women. It happens once every 2 years or so, but man is it a confidence booster.

    Im a single guy and I like getting hit on by women. It happens once every 2 years or so, but man is it a confidence booster.
  • smileybooliz
    smileybooliz Posts: 193 Member
    Options
    If you're married why are you worried about guys hitting on you? I'm confused?
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    Options
    shes not ugly. theres nothing obviously wrong with her.. but shes being quiet, in the corner, not smiling. she doesnt look like shes having that great of a time, even if she is. Because she wasnt engaging socially with the world around her (maybe she expects it to come to her??) I didnt even notice.


    Ugh I hate seeing this because this is honestly me. I feel so self-conscious, especially when I'm out with my really pretty friends. Odds on rather than not wanting to be social, she was self-conscious - and if her friend she was with was hotter, then that's probably the reason - and thought there was no way that anyone would pay attention to her compared to her friend, so she resignated herself to the corner.

    I know half of the time when I do this I put off a B**** vibe, because I'd rather appear B****y than lonely. Go figure.
  • Mad_Dog_Muscle
    Mad_Dog_Muscle Posts: 1,251 Member
    Options
    I didnt look at all 4 pages of responses, but the first thing I would notice is the rock on your left hand.... if thats there, its not a matter of you being "out of my league", but more a question of you being someones wife... THAT makes you out of play!!
  • jmobashrn11
    jmobashrn11 Posts: 120
    Options
    You know, I was about to get really judgmental about this question because as someone who has been in a relationship for the last 7 years, I don't understand wanting to be hit on at the bar.

    But then I remembered that when I was younger and a little more immature, I would pout about the fact that my single girlfriends seemed to get all of the attention from the boys we ran around with at the time. I wanted them to show me attention because I wanted to have the proof that I was pretty, had a good personality, and worthy of being "woo'd". And as your husband said, my now-fiance would tell me that it was because I really was all of those things and guys were either intimidated or bought drinks for my friends to get closer to me.

    Now that I'm older, I relish in the fact that my engagement ring makes me free from the cheesy pick-up lines and possibility of getting drugged. And I also realized that in general, being in a relationship over time also was being reflected in my dress (less cleavage, less leg, less jewelry) and attitude (less flirty, less touching, less suggestive talk). This is likely the reason and you likely have your guard up and carry yourself in a different manner than your friends.

    Don't take this the wrong way, but I think this is something that probably bothers you more than you've expressed here or you wouldn't have asked a question about it, curious or not. And you certainly wouldn't have discussed it with your husband. I really encourage you to think about why this bothers you on some level. I know for me, it came down to the fact that I had a beautiful best friend (we're talking knock-out gorgeous, she's now a working model) from 2nd to 9th grade and she always got all the attention. She stole quite a few boys away from me and it hurt me deep. Being at the bar and not getting hit on brought back those same feelings of jealousy and insecurity.

    Just some food for thought.
  • committomittxoxo
    committomittxoxo Posts: 339 Member
    Options
    I'm a married guy and I like getting hit on by women. It happens once every 2 years or so, but man is it a confidence booster.

    Im a single guy and I like getting hit on by women. It happens once every 2 years or so, but man is it a confidence booster.

    Lol.. Very very funny. :)

Categories