Attitudes of people with different levels of fitness and wei
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I'm fat. I know I'm fat. That's why I'm here. What I get upset about is the "big boned" comment. No. You aren't big boned. If you do that stupid hand around your wrist test... and then lose weight, you'll see what a joke it is. When I was fatter, I could not touch my middle finger and thumb around my wrist. I was "big boned." Now, after losing 60+ pounds (I began losing before I started mfp), I magically am no longer big boned. My mom tried the, "I'm larger boned than you are," BS on me recently... she's insane. She's even shorter than I am and I've seen pictures from when she was in high school and thin. She's fooling herself, just like half (or more) of the rest the country of "big boned" people....
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I find this post kind of rude. Excuses or not we have all been there and some are still on the journey. Denial, metabolisms, age gender and hereditary does factor as well. What comes easy to you is not so easy to others... but since our feet are all pointed in the same direction as long as we all get to the same destination at some point, I don't mind the gripes and excuses or the word fat. Instead of pointing out what you see going on, starting pointing in at how you can changer yourself to help inspire those around you.0
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I find that when someone says, "I am not meaning to be offensive" usually means they realize what they're about to say or type is offensive. Your claim that "fitter" or "correct weight" people have a more no nonsense attitude vs. overweight people being in denial is offensive because it generalizes people. I know plenty of fit individuals who are in denial and I know plenty of overweight people who are real with themselves and don't blame their weight on other issues.I have a genuine observation and wonder if people agree with me and what their opinion is. I am not meaning to be in any way offensive.0 -
I was a super skinny child until around the second grade and then for no reason I started to balloon. No change in diet, no change in exercise. I was a very active child. I lived in the country all we did was run around outside all day. always on the move. I even started walking and running at the track with my mom. nothing worked. I wasnt over eating then. eventually I noticed my hunger cravings were worse than they were before. I continued to gain weight slowly and surely until I got in high school and decided ok I am old enough to take this into my own hands. running at the part barely eating anything at all. damn near starving myself and didnt lose a pound. eventually I gave up. Now after doing tons of research and doctors appointments I have a low thyroid problem and have other health issues. I have started noticing that my body doesnt like wheat or dairy! and for the last year while i was a vegetarian I was still gaining weight. Probably due to the fact that I was doing whole wheat this and whole wheat that.......long story shorter....it has taken a lot of research on my part to figure out what was hindering my weight loss. I have had doctors tell me how many calories to eat and be done. did that...no real difference at all. telling me to eat 1200 calories didnt work at all. so I believe that different people are coming from different places. not all fat people stuff their face all the time. and I realize I am the most hungry if I end up eating even a little bit more carbs than usual. sometimes it takes a while to figure it out and I love this site because of some of the people I have met and been introduced to sooo many new things that have helped me when I was sitting still on the scales and couldnt understand why. because you got skinny doesnt give you a right to be an *kitten* to anyone. how about being supportive and encouraging. if you been there then you should know what it is like and how hard it can be. I have no tolerance for BS. that is you using your new found weight loss as the same kind of crutch you accuse fat people of using. get over yourself. one day you could be sitting back on the other side of the fence trying to make nice with the same people you are talking bad about. people kill me. I make no excuses except the fact that no one knew to suggest anything else to an overweight child except exercise. and when it didnt work no one said ****. not even my exercise crazed mother...instead she just started talking about how I needed to lose weight. unless you have the smoking gun in your hand that will cure everyone's weight loss no matter what, I suggest you get off your high horse (if you sit still too long you might get fat right??). go do what you want with your body and let other people do what they do with theirs.
P.S. I have had the depo provera shot in high school as well. That did even more damage to my weight and other things. no change but that. If we were all cookie cutter inside then there would not be a need for different types of medicine for the same thing or different side effects for different people...0 -
The problem with that is it brings about the victim culture which I believe is one of the issues surrounding a lot of the problems we experience in society today.
We are blaming our surroundings for being too tempting but there are plenty of people who live in these same surroundings we overcome the temptation, or just aren't tempted at all.
It is the individual who has issues if they don't live a healthy lifestyle so it is up to the individual to resolve it, whether that is with the help of others or on their own.
To say that there needs to be cultural changes is correct, but these need to be changes of mindset by individuals, there is nothing governments or health agencies can do other than put the information out there.
We need to take control of our own lives and not expect someone else to come along and fix it for us.
Why can't both you AND grinch be right? Yes, the individual needs to take control. But we also need to make drastic changes as a society. We can't expect that obese individuals are all going to lose weight on their own, and ALL of us are going to pay the consequences through higher health care rates and later medicare/disability etc.
To be honest I think we are both agreeing - I just think that as long as there is demand for all the tempting things that are bad for us, they will remain. The only way to make them go away is for people to reject them.
The biggest difference between us is that you still blame the individual, I think it has gone way beyond blaming the individual. I can't blame the individual for a problem that the majority of my country's population has (ie. overweight or obesity), because I know that the battle to maintain weight loss can be so difficult. I find trying to manipulate calories alone without eating a cleaner diet is like being on Day-1 of quitting smoking for the rest of your life.
I think whilst I do blame the individual, the fact is that no matter who is at fault it falls on the individual to fix themselves as no one is going to help.
It doesn't matter what should or shouldn't happen, what matters is what will and won't happen. And since general society won't be offering any help the individual needs to accept responsibility for themselves.
I disagree that general society won't help. I really think general society doesn't understand the problem, or there isn't enough consensus about what the problem is or how it should be solved. I think 'eat less, move more' is doing everyone a disservice. People are confused. One minute people say, "eat healthy foods", the next minute they say "all that matters is calories". Those are conflicting ideas. Personally I don't believe that calories are the right approach to weight loss, because I think they will take care of themselves if people are willing to give up (or severely cutback) the highly rewarding foods that tend to be overeaten. Many will disagree and say calories are the answer and that moderation is key, but I have found that personally moderation is impossible when it comes to the physiological drive to overeat that I and many others face.0 -
I find this post kind of rude. Excuses or not we have all been there and some are still on the journey. Denial, metabolisms, age gender and hereditary does factor as well. What comes easy to you is not so easy to others... but since our feet are all pointed in the same direction as long as we all get to the same destination at some point, I don't mind the gripes and excuses or the word fat. Instead of pointing out what you see going on, starting pointing in at how you can changer yourself to help inspire those around you.
Well put!0 -
A few months after joining MFP (as you can see, I've been around a while) I participated in a thread where the OP whined that people were nicer to her now that she's thinner than they were when she was (gasp!) Fat.
She got enough people whining with her when I decided to speak up and simply ask what's the problem? If people are being nice to you for any reason, what's your beef?
Conversation ensued and I simply stated the point that we all need to stop whining and making excuses. If you have a metabolic disorder, were abused as a child, thyroid condition, yada yada-- who cares? Most of us are here because we wanted to stop being fat. Yes, fat-- fat, fat, fat-- it's not an easy word to hear directed at you. But if it's true, why get so offended?
If you want to stop being fat, work at it. Oh my-- you'd have thought I told people they were ugly and their mama never loved 'em.
A little disclaimer-- I came here weighing 211 pounds in July '08. Through diet and exercise, by August '09 I was down to 164. I was eating 1200-1400 calories faithfully, and training for a half marathon. Long story short, through the long-term deprivation of adequate nutrition (13 months where I was not eating back my exercise calories, hoping to get to my goal of 160) my body began to rebel. Slowly and steadily, despite my 1200-1400 calorie base, my body turned everything to fat-- and the weight began to creep.
By June of 2011 I was back up to 206-- still counting and logging my calories faithfully, and steady exercise. THAT, my friends is a metabolic disorder. And yes, I'm fat again. It hurts. It's horrible. I worked so hard to get it off, and poof-- it was back on despite my best efforts.
I'm working through it with the aid of T3 hormone-- keeping my calories to a sustainable level-- 1600-2000 or so-- my current weight is 193.5. Slowly and surely I'll get it back off.
My attitude about fitness today is what it always was-- it doesn't matter why I'm fat. I still have the responsibility to work my butt off in hopes of getting, well, my butt off!
no excuses.0 -
Genetics? Just because your whole family consumes 5000 calories a day and doesn't move off the sofa doesn't mean your fat is genetic, it means it's environmental.
Love that! I always say that their is no such thing as being fat because of genes! It's because everyone in the family overeats
Unless you INHERITED a metabolic syndrome....... THERE is such a thing...... just not fat because they are fat.
then when you find out this is the case, change your lifestyle to fit you genetic predisposition.0 -
Well, I'm fat both because I ate more then I should and because I developed hypothyroidism and didn't know it (I'm also not American).
I don't know what kind of metabolism I have but I'm guessing because of my medical condition that it's maybe not good.
Regardless. I'm fat because I love food... and I don't know many people who would actually say otherwise.
Now, losing the weight is where it gets difficult. Some of us can cut back calories, increase exercise and STILL not lose. THAT is metabolism and has nothing to do with denial (unless they are cheating on the cutting back of calories).
Either way, welcome to the forums?0 -
I got fat for two reasons. 1. I ate too many calories each day; 2. I stopped working out.
I was on fertility drugs, have thyroid issues, PCOS, etc., etc.....These are all excuses. There's no magic trick to losing weight. If there was, no one would be fat.
If Person A eats whatever they want in whatever quantity they want and stays thin, and you gained weight because you ate too many calories, does that mean you're a person of lesser character than Person A? Are you weak-willed compared to Person A? Do you deserve to be scrutinized for something that comes automatic to Person A but requires a ton of effort for you?0 -
I have many thoughts that I will keep to myself or I could be here typing all day. :laugh:
I do agree for many people fat is the big bad 3 letter F word.
Many times I have called myself fat or said something about my fatness and it's funny how bad people take that. I was just making and honest statement. :ohwell:
In a Weight Watchers meeting, not too long ago, I gave a reason for some people not exercising. I said, sometimes you are just too fat. Went on to explain, over the years I have been too fat a couple times, and that made exercise very uncomfortable.
Yeah-didn't make any friends that day!! :sad:
I mistakenly thought if it was my FAT, I could name it.
Ps- the leader did not write my reason on the board and said she couldn't write that F word.0 -
I don't hold blanket beliefs about how/why someone is in the position they are in or how to fix it. everyone is different.0
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Are you effing kidding me?!?!?!?! You, sir, are a giant bottle of massengil!!!!!! You actually believe that I fail at life because I am not some triathelete? Or "unf**kable"? That is the dumbest thing I have ever heard of!!!! I was fat.......... not because I was a "slob who just want to sit around and b!tch while mindlessly pushing a$$bread down my throat".
You know what is worse than fat people. Arrogant, narrow minded jerks! I would rather be around 30 "fat slobs" than one of you.
Please quote me where I said fat people were a fail at life.
And now if someone posts something, it means they agree with it. interesting0 -
i'm overweight and i know its only my own fault for eating too much and not getting up off my *kitten* enough.
i dont agree with the excuses some people have and even though i wouldnt like someone else calling me fat, i would say i am... the reason for this is i think that well yes right now i am but someday i wont be so its not massively offensive and i think that it will just make me more determined to NOT be fat.0 -
I have many thoughts that I will keep to myself or I could be here typing all day. :laugh:
I do agree for many people fat is the big bad 3 letter F word.
Many times I have called myself fat or said something about my fatness and it's funny how bad people take that. I was just making and honest statement. :ohwell:
In a Weight Watchers meeting, not too long ago, I gave a reason for some people not exercising. I said, sometimes you are just too fat. Went on to explain, over the years I have been too fat a couple times, and that made exercise very uncomfortable.
Yeah-didn't make any friends that day!! :sad:
I mistakenly thought if it was my FAT, I could name it.
Ps- the leader did not write my reason on the board and said she couldn't write that F word.
I agree with you totally. I started out of the gate recently doing turbo jam lol then I realized maybe I should go a little smaller so I wouldnt hurt myself again. And there is a stigma behind that word because most of the time people say it to be mean. I dont dislike the word but Its not my best friend either.0 -
Having said all that in my previous post......
Weight can be an issue that has far more to do with many others things other than diet and exercise alone.
Sometimes people are beating themselves up with internal issues, never to be shared, so they don't want beat up again for the physical appearance the issues leave.0 -
This is my take on it:
I agree with you about that fit people have a "no nonsense" attitude about obesity. I also agree with you, that overweight individuals are often in denial or minimize how serious their condition may be. I do think a lot of Americans take the easy way out on accepting their obesity and "feeling beautiful they way they are."
However, not every seemingly obese or overweight person is unhealthy, which is an assumption a lot of fit people make. I've seen people that were 20 to 50 pounds overweight, and they could run with the best of them. Many plus size women celebrities workout every day and are healthy. Both sides of the spectrum need to be careful about judgement. Overweight individuals need to be honest about their situation.
I think the word "fat" is so hurtful because it implies laziness. For me, that is the truth. I'm fat, and I got this way because of my own doing. At the same time, fit people need to be careful about judging overweight people and assuming that they all eat too much and are lazy.
I once saw a therapist who had weight issues and saw a lot of clients with weight issues, and she would tell me that when she saw an overweight person, she didn't automatically see someone who was lazy--she saw someone in a lot of emotional pain. For extremely obese people, she was right. There is usually something else going on besides just eating too much and not exercising. Because if it was this simple, it would be easy to fix, and it's not always easy to overcome the barriers that keep a person fat.0 -
Everyone is tied to this weight number. When someone tells me they can't lose weight because of .____. I just tell them they should just get in better shape then. I have been on a plateau for a while now, but I increased my lifting and my cardio in that time, and I even dropped a couple of pants sizes.
I consider that successful even if the scale is stuck. Anyone can get in better shape, no matter what their genetic or medical situation might be.
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!!! I am going to put this on my fridge... as long as I know I'm doing the right things, eating much better, and putting forth a sincere and dedicated effort to incorporate extra exercise into every single day, I do consider that a success and hopefully the weight falling off will be a happy by-product!!! Nice words, Sir!0 -
I don't hold blanket beliefs about how/why someone is in the position they are in or how to fix it. everyone is different.
that is a classic way to view this. and I believe it is the most fair.0 -
When I first started to work out..was about 10 years ago. I was able to get down to 150..from 175 and maintained a size 10. I did not however change the foods I was eating...I am pretty sure this had something to do with it..but also the fact that I had hypothyroidism..but was undiagnosed.
Fast forward 11 years..I am taking meds...armour thyroid, metformin....and am able to maintain between 135-137. I have changed my eating habits..but will admit lots of slipping cause I have reached my goal weight.
As far as others..I try to be sympathetic..cause it does take one person to say the wrong thing to have these people take a few steps back.
I do think some people on here have forgotten what life was like before their lightbulb was turned on..after all its very easy to slip into old ways than to stay within the current lifestyle..0 -
You want MY OPINION? Ooooooo bluntly honest...
You really dont know much...90% of the battle to GET healthier is a mental challenge. And with that, it's about a wake-up call. How the individual got to their state of realization is their business. Losing a leg, having a heart attack, being diagnosed with Diabetes, Looking into a mirror and actually SEEING their present state, a child saying to a parent ... Can you please stop smoking? Can you get fit? I need you in my life.... The last two were my personal experiences.
It matters not where the individual lives, US, England, Japan...it's about waking up and realizing WTF did "I" go? The pressures of peers, marketing, impacts of life in general (I lost my wife - went into depression and focused ALL energy on my children) add to losing one's self being.
I see your post as rude. You apparently think you know everyone's (on MFP) background and why they are not fit and healthy. Start looking deeper. There are PLENTY of fit and healthy individuals. There are those that have EOD's (both battling anorexia & bulimia). This community has people battling depression, physical injuries, alcoholism (which is rather HIGH in the UK) - see that...poke the US, we POKE back), and Anxiety disorders.
You need to remove your predetermined prejudices and be supportive to those that seeking to get healthy rather than look like--closed-vane-minded individuals to make yourself feel better.0 -
I had a conversation about this yesterday. I think people get offended with being called fat because of the stigma. But I think it is what it is. If you are fat, you are. Don't make excuses and do something about it. My highest weight a few months ago was 189. I got on the scale and cried my eyes out. I just reached 170 yesterday and it feels a lot better than sitting around being upset that I'm fat. If you let yourself go and don't work on it, then that is your own fault. I don't go around calling people fat though, because I know it is rude and offensive to say it out loud. But if the word wasn't "fat", it would be another word. A rose by any other name smells just as sweet.0
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The problem with that is it brings about the victim culture which I believe is one of the issues surrounding a lot of the problems we experience in society today.
We are blaming our surroundings for being too tempting but there are plenty of people who live in these same surroundings we overcome the temptation, or just aren't tempted at all.
It is the individual who has issues if they don't live a healthy lifestyle so it is up to the individual to resolve it, whether that is with the help of others or on their own.
To say that there needs to be cultural changes is correct, but these need to be changes of mindset by individuals, there is nothing governments or health agencies can do other than put the information out there.
We need to take control of our own lives and not expect someone else to come along and fix it for us.
Why can't both you AND grinch be right? Yes, the individual needs to take control. But we also need to make drastic changes as a society. We can't expect that obese individuals are all going to lose weight on their own, and ALL of us are going to pay the consequences through higher health care rates and later medicare/disability etc.
To be honest I think we are both agreeing - I just think that as long as there is demand for all the tempting things that are bad for us, they will remain. The only way to make them go away is for people to reject them.
The biggest difference between us is that you still blame the individual, I think it has gone way beyond blaming the individual. I can't blame the individual for a problem that the majority of my country's population has (ie. overweight or obesity), because I know that the battle to maintain weight loss can be so difficult. I find trying to manipulate calories alone without eating a cleaner diet is like being on Day-1 of quitting smoking for the rest of your life.
I think whilst I do blame the individual, the fact is that no matter who is at fault it falls on the individual to fix themselves as no one is going to help.
It doesn't matter what should or shouldn't happen, what matters is what will and won't happen. And since general society won't be offering any help the individual needs to accept responsibility for themselves.
I disagree that general society won't help. I really think general society doesn't understand the problem, or there isn't enough consensus about what the problem is or how it should be solved. I think 'eat less, move more' is doing everyone a disservice. People are confused. One minute people say, "eat healthy foods", the next minute they say "all that matters is calories". Those are conflicting ideas. Personally I don't believe that calories are the right approach to weight loss, because I think they will take care of themselves if people are willing to give up (or severely cutback) the highly rewarding foods that tend to be overeaten. Many will disagree and say calories are the answer and that moderation is key, but I have found that personally moderation is impossible when it comes to the physiological drive to overeat that I and many others face.
Change starts with YOU. Not society.0 -
So it always gets me wondering is the denial and political correctness that prevent appropriate honesty a major cause of the increasing trend of obesity??
Yes.
We are all unique snowflakes, but we are all human.
Think of it as cars. We are all different makes, models and years. Some need more gas, some need less, some burn fast, some burn slow, some have engine problems, some go green and cut out certain kinds of fuel.... but they all need oil, fuel, maintenance and protection.
We dont come with a warranty, we have to be responsible enough to keep our own selves in check.
It doesnt matter if you are foreign, or specially built, or youve been in a car accident or had parts changed or the last owner treated it badly... you're still the same kind of machine as I am.
BUT... the truth always boils down to the same two things.
1. If you truly want something, you make it happen. If you don't want it enough, you make excuses. If you don't even want to try, you make yourself a victim.
2. NO ONE BUT YOU can be the person that wakes up one morning and it all clicks into place and you know you are ready... No one can inspire you to stand up on your REAL Day 1. That moment is all you.
So if you surround yourself with people who are careful not to mention to you the reality that you are morbidly obese or just plain fat and losing control of where your body is heading, without care to change, or you surround yourself with people that say, oh you're lovely just the way you are
... and you arent happy and you dont feel lovely and you want control..... then you are going to have to shed those enablers that coddle you or you wont see the truth. They block you. You block you.
People choose blindness.
So people can come here and get upset that fat is an insult, list all the reasons why diet, exercise, sleep and water wont help them because they are special, and everyone will go one listening to them ***** and moan without changing anything real... because we know they just havent committed yet.
But when they do, and they stop making excuses and embracing the victim mentality... they will see. They will truly actually see.0 -
So it always gets me wondering is the denial and political correctness that prevent appropriate honesty a major cause of the increasing trend of obesity??
Yes.
We are all unique snowflakes, but we are all human.
Think of it as cars. We are all different makes, models and years. Some need more gas, some need less, some burn fast, some burn slow, some have engine problems, some go green and cut out certain kinds of fuel.... but they all need oil, fuel, maintenance and protection.
We dont come with a warranty, we have to be responsible enough to keep our own selves in check.
It doesnt matter if you are foreign, or specially built, or youve been in a car accident or had parts changed or the last owner treated it badly... you're still the same kind of machine as I am.
BUT... the truth always boils down to the same two things.
1. If you truly want something, you make it happen. If you don't want it enough, you make excuses. If you don't even want to try, you make yourself a victim.
2. NO ONE BUT YOU can be the person that wakes up one morning and it all clicks into place and you know you are ready... No one can inspire you to stand up on your REAL Day 1. That moment is all you.
So if you surround yourself with people who are careful not to mention to you the reality that you are morbidly obese or just plain fat and losing control of where your body is heading, without care to change, or you surround yourself with people that say, oh you're lovely just the way you are ... and you arent happy and you dont feel lovely and you want control..... then you are going to have to shed those enablers that coddle you or you wont see the truth. They block you. You block you.
People choose blindness.
So people can come here and get upset that fat is an insult, list all the reasons why diet, exercise, sleep and water wont help them because they are special, and everyone will go one listening to them ***** and moan without changing anything real... because we know they just havent committed yet....................[end quote]
if they are on MFP apparently they are making some type of change. things just may not be going well for them. but Im sure people who are now skinny should get on here and say well you are fat do something about it is going to help more than the people who are on here genuinely walking some people through this stuff. brainstorming with them on things they can do differently in order to make a change work. Im also sure that when you are sitting there not losing inches or weight someone being cynical is really really helpful. damn it makes me feel like a million bucks just thinking about it. I have been here since december and guess what I had to up my calories to start feeling any better and my scales shifted a bit after not moving for months. and I kept my calories even when the scale didnt budge. and that came from a recommendation of a skinny person on MFP who had been there! but Im sure it would have worked out better if they had giving me a snide remark and called me fat...yea cause that works every time.0 -
So it always gets me wondering is the denial and political correctness that prevent appropriate honesty a major cause of the increasing trend of obesity??
Yes.
We are all unique snowflakes, but we are all human.
Think of it as cars. We are all different makes, models and years. Some need more gas, some need less, some burn fast, some burn slow, some have engine problems, some go green and cut out certain kinds of fuel.... but they all need oil, fuel, maintenance and protection.
We dont come with a warranty, we have to be responsible enough to keep our own selves in check.
It doesnt matter if you are foreign, or specially built, or youve been in a car accident or had parts changed or the last owner treated it badly... you're still the same kind of machine as I am.
BUT... the truth always boils down to the same two things.
1. If you truly want something, you make it happen. If you don't want it enough, you make excuses. If you don't even want to try, you make yourself a victim.
2. NO ONE BUT YOU can be the person that wakes up one morning and it all clicks into place and you know you are ready... No one can inspire you to stand up on your REAL Day 1. That moment is all you.
So if you surround yourself with people who are careful not to mention to you the reality that you are morbidly obese or just plain fat and losing control of where your body is heading, without care to change, or you surround yourself with people that say, oh you're lovely just the way you are ... and you arent happy and you dont feel lovely and you want control..... then you are going to have to shed those enablers that coddle you or you wont see the truth. They block you. You block you.
People choose blindness.
So people can come here and get upset that fat is an insult, list all the reasons why diet, exercise, sleep and water wont help them because they are special, and everyone will go one listening to them ***** and moan without changing anything real... because we know they just havent committed yet.
But when they do, and they stop making excuses and embracing the victim mentality... they will see. They will truly actually see.
Nicely said!0 -
if they are on MFP apparently they are making some type of change.
things just may not be going well for them.
but Im sure people who are now skinny should get on here and say well you are fat do something about it is going to help more than the people who are on here genuinely walking some people through this stuff.
brainstorming with them on things they can do differently in order to make a change work. Im also sure that when you are sitting there not losing inches or weight someone being cynical is really really helpful.
damn it makes me feel like a million bucks just thinking about it.
I have been here since december and guess what I had to up my calories to start feeling any better and my scales shifted a bit after not moving for months.
and that came from a recommendation of a skinny person who had been there! but Im sure it would have worked out better if they had giving me a snide remark.
Im not sure what you think I just said to you that you are so offended by.0 -
So it always gets me wondering is the denial and political correctness that prevent appropriate honesty a major cause of the increasing trend of obesity??
Yes.
We are all unique snowflakes, but we are all human.
Think of it as cars. We are all different makes, models and years. Some need more gas, some need less, some burn fast, some burn slow, some have engine problems, some go green and cut out certain kinds of fuel.... but they all need oil, fuel, maintenance and protection.
We dont come with a warranty, we have to be responsible enough to keep our own selves in check.
It doesnt matter if you are foreign, or specially built, or youve been in a car accident or had parts changed or the last owner treated it badly... you're still the same kind of machine as I am.
BUT... the truth always boils down to the same two things.
1. If you truly want something, you make it happen. If you don't want it enough, you make excuses. If you don't even want to try, you make yourself a victim.
2. NO ONE BUT YOU can be the person that wakes up one morning and it all clicks into place and you know you are ready... No one can inspire you to stand up on your REAL Day 1. That moment is all you.
So if you surround yourself with people who are careful not to mention to you the reality that you are morbidly obese or just plain fat and losing control of where your body is heading, without care to change, or you surround yourself with people that say, oh you're lovely just the way you are ... and you arent happy and you dont feel lovely and you want control..... then you are going to have to shed those enablers that coddle you or you wont see the truth. They block you. You block you.
People choose blindness.
So people can come here and get upset that fat is an insult, list all the reasons why diet, exercise, sleep and water wont help them because they are special, and everyone will go one listening to them ***** and moan without changing anything real... because we know they just havent committed yet.
But when they do, and they stop making excuses and embracing the victim mentality... they will see. They will truly actually see.
Definitely. You hit the nail on the head.
Someone on facebook the other day who happens to be morbidly obese posted "Guys are so shallow. I am beautiful on the inside."
I felt like saying, yes, you are, but you are also refusing to add the you on the outside to the equation. That's the problem.
People all have different stories, but what we all have in common is that our bodies respond to proper care and maintainence as well as the lack of it.
It has to click one day. Thats basically it. You have to have that moment where starting tomorrow is no longer an option. Fat insults wont help anymore than constructive criticism- at least it never worked in my case. I had to make the choice-and need to continue to make the choice every day.0 -
Pretty much my entire family is fat. My sister and I were both adopted (different birth parents) and we're both fat. I can easily trace my weight to my adoptive parents - trace, not blame, it's my fault. We celebrated everything with food - good grades? let's go out to dinner. trophy for football? let's go out to dinner. birthday? dinner....etc. Lots of sweets, lots of high fat foods, lots of weight.
Two years ago, I decided that 285 pounds was not good. What did I do? Ate less and exercised.
So, I'm still fat (I have about 30 pounds to get to my goal of 190) but, I'm no longer obese. I'm not saying it's the same for everyone. But, medical reasons not withstanding, it does come down to calories in/calories out. How you fix it - vegan or paleo, low-carb or low-fat, cardio or weights - can be a more personal decision, but I believe that for the vast majority of people, it really is that simple.0 -
So it always gets me wondering is the denial and political correctness that prevent appropriate honesty a major cause of the increasing trend of obesity??
Yes.
We are all unique snowflakes, but we are all human.
Think of it as cars. We are all different makes, models and years. Some need more gas, some need less, some burn fast, some burn slow, some have engine problems, some go green and cut out certain kinds of fuel.... but they all need oil, fuel, maintenance and protection.
We dont come with a warranty, we have to be responsible enough to keep our own selves in check.
It doesnt matter if you are foreign, or specially built, or youve been in a car accident or had parts changed or the last owner treated it badly... you're still the same kind of machine as I am.
BUT... the truth always boils down to the same two things.
1. If you truly want something, you make it happen. If you don't want it enough, you make excuses. If you don't even want to try, you make yourself a victim.
2. NO ONE BUT YOU can be the person that wakes up one morning and it all clicks into place and you know you are ready... No one can inspire you to stand up on your REAL Day 1. That moment is all you.
So if you surround yourself with people who are careful not to mention to you the reality that you are morbidly obese or just plain fat and losing control of where your body is heading, without care to change, or you surround yourself with people that say, oh you're lovely just the way you are ... and you arent happy and you dont feel lovely and you want control..... then you are going to have to shed those enablers that coddle you or you wont see the truth. They block you. You block you.
People choose blindness.
So people can come here and get upset that fat is an insult, list all the reasons why diet, exercise, sleep and water wont help them because they are special, and everyone will go one listening to them ***** and moan without changing anything real... because we know they just havent committed yet.
But when they do, and they stop making excuses and embracing the victim mentality... they will see. They will truly actually see.
Definitely. You hit the nail on the head.
Someone on facebook the other day who happens to be morbidly obese posted "Guys are so shallow. I am beautiful on the inside."
I felt like saying, yes, you are, but you are also refusing to add the you on the outside to the equation. That's the problem.
People all have different stories, but what we all have in common is that our bodies respond to proper care and maintainence as well as the lack of it.
It has to click one day. Thats basically it. You have to have that moment where starting tomorrow is no longer an option. Fat insults wont help anymore than constructive criticism- at least it never worked in my case. I had to make the choice-and need to continue to make the choice every day.
I hate that comment - it's as if it suggests that as exterior beauty increases, interior beauty decreases.0
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