Attitudes of people with different levels of fitness and wei

m60kaf

Having being on MFP for a few years more recently I have started to look at the forums.

I have a genuine observation and wonder if people agree with me and what their opinion is. I am not meaning to be in any way offensive.

I notice that fitter / correct weight people seem to have a more no-nonsense approach - to get fit you exercise , lots , and eat less because you are overweight because you eat too much.

Overweight people seem to be constantly in denial and bringing up health and metabolism issues that are, whilst unfortunate in those they affect, rarely the true reason that is eating too much. The word 'fat' on here almost seems to be a massive insult

I saw a program on TV where someone had to have a leg cut off from health complications that were simply overweight - but there was no addressing of the weight problem just the acceptance of the situation -- if I had a leg cut off because of weight I would glue my mouth shut!!

So it always gets me wondering is the denial and political correctness that prevent appropriate honesty a major cause of the increasing trend of obesity??

Interestingly enough I'm English and find American posters on here (in a country with more obesity) very quickly flare up at the use of the fat word. As do the larger posters (I admit I am judging this from profile pictures) you wont see a toned person defending metabolism as a major cause of obesity - even if they once weighed 20 stone

salxtai

I agree that metabolism is often thrown around as the sole cause of obesity / being overweight.


I think its simply coming down to the fact that those that are fit or have reach their ideal weight / body shape have put in the effort to understand the concepts that underlie weight loss: nutrition and exercise.

It often probably takes a while for someone who's never considered these concepts to actually to consider that they play a role in why they are where they are, and possibly even longer to sit through and go down the learning pathway that others who have lost weight have done before them.


... also be prepared for potential flare-ups with this post

Kai85

Interesting observation. Personally hate the word "fat" and it is enough to bring me to tears...

I think that a number of overweight/obese people would have emotional issues that need to be addressed as well. I'm not saying all but certainly a significant percentage (even if that is a small %). This way denial can be an effective coping mechanism.

athensguy

The US has the second highest level of disbelief in science when compared to 32 European countries and Japan. The only country with a higher level of disbelief in that study was Turkey. When you have a population with thoughts like that, it's hard to have a serious conversation using generally accepted facts as the basis for your argument.

Vegetablearian

I agree that metabolism is often thrown around as the sole cause of obesity / being overweight.

I think its simply coming down to the fact that those that are fit or have reach their ideal weight / body shape have put in the effort to understand the concepts that underlie weight loss: nutrition and exercise.

It often probably takes a while for someone who's never considered these concepts to actually to consider that they play a role in why they are where they are, and possibly even longer to sit through and go down the learning pathway that others who have lost weight have done before them.

+1
I also love the fat gene arguement and the my whole family are large one.

Im 194lbs because I have over eaten I know I have and im not in denial about that I know I need to lose weight and I am losing slowly as I am not dong a stupid starvation diet id rather have as little as 100cal deficit and eat very nutritious meals low in fat and keep me full

lenaa50

I know my answer will upset a few members here, but I do agree with you.
Basically, YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT - if you eat excessively, the extra calories need to go somewhere, so they stick around,
our lower parts of the bodies, ie bottoms, thighs and tummys.

Eating less with some exercise, (don't need to go mad), not only helps you feel good, but benefits your health, not only at this current time of your life but for future. its only until you train your stomach to receive and digest less food,

kwest_4_fitness

I was fat when I started, made no bones about being fat, and was already on my way to not being fat when I joined this site. I would assume that it's not level of fitness so much as level of acceptance and commitment. Blaming metabolism straight out of the gate without a medical diagnosis is not the attitude of someone that has accepted they are overweight, nor have they committed to losing it. Science proves that metabolism is actually higher in chubbier folks. It's when you start getting close to goal weight that your metabolism really starts to give you fits.

bobie1978

Doesn't age play a factor into metabolism? Also gender? My bf eats about 10xs more than I do and is skinny! He also sweats while he's not even doing anything. Meaning that he is burning calories! While it takes me almost 30 min into an intense workout to break a sweat. I am overweight the only excuse I have is because I EAT too much!

ablykins

You make some poignant observations! I think because fat is a subjective term, people are really sensitive to it. I knew I was fat when I decided to lose weight and get it shape and it didn't offend me when others recognized it. I'm not the type that likes to be coddled though and realized that my weight and my health were my responsibility- no one else's and that there is only on true, lasting path to a fit, healthy body- exercise and eat right. Some people just aren't willing to accept that they must change and that there is no secret short-cut. Eventually, everyone who takes their fitness to the next level has to accept that daily discipline is require and there is no way around it. No matter what you write down in your food journal or post about on the forums- your body records every meal, every workout, and every beverage. What you eat in private always shows in public- some people will accept it, some never will. :flowerforyou:

grinch031

I actually think the complete opposite of the OP. I think its nonsense that an obesity epidemic that has skyrocketed in the USA since the late 1970s and is spreading through the rest of the world is a psychological disorder.

I think its nonsense that naturally skinny people who have not experienced chronic hunger can understand what an obese person goes through.

And I've been skinny and fit most of my life. Its not until the last couple of years that my body stopped tolerating certain foods, and exercise had absolutely nothing to do with it. I do twice as much exercise at 30 than I did at 18 and I have to eat less in order to stay thin.

kwest_4_fitness

I also love the fat gene arguement and the my whole family are large one.

I think people confuse with the hereditary tendency toward obesity with just sitting on their *kitten* getting fat. Just because my family has the tendency toward alcoholism doesn't mean that we're all alcoholics. Addiction is a hard road to travel, though, and once addicted to any substance, it's hard to break.

AntWrig

Having being on MFP for a few years more recently I have started to look at the forums.

I have a genuine observation and wonder if people agree with me and what their opinion is. I am not meaning to be in any way offensive.

I notice that fitter / correct weight people seem to have a more no-nonsense approach - to get fit you exercise , lots , and eat less because you are overweight because you eat too much.

Overweight people seem to be constantly in denial and bringing up health and metabolism issues that are, whilst unfortunate in those they affect, rarely the true reason that is eating too much. The word 'fat' on here almost seems to be a massive insult

I saw a program on TV where someone had to have a leg cut off from health complications that were simply overweight - but there was no addressing of the weight problem just the acceptance of the situation -- if I had a leg cut off because of weight I would glue my mouth shut!!

So it always gets me wondering is the denial and political correctness that prevent appropriate honesty a major cause of the increasing trend of obesity??

Interestingly enough I'm English and find American posters on here (in a country with more obesity) very quickly flare up at the use of the fat word. As do the larger posters (I admit I am judging this from profile pictures) you wont see a toned person defending metabolism as a major cause of obesity - even if they once weighed 20 stone

Agreed and I was fat.

Yuo mad?

brookepenni

Doesn't age play a factor into metabolism? Also gender? My bf eats about 10xs more than I do and is skinny! He also sweats while he's not even doing anything. Meaning that he is burning calories! While it takes me almost 30 min into an intense workout to break a sweat. I am overweight the only excuse I have is because I EAT too much!

Off topic I know... But sweating is not a sign of burning calories. It's fluid movement, that can be caused by heat, exertion and other factors - but it does not mean calories are being moved.

Elizabeth_C34

When I was bigger, I was desperate for anything to blame but myself. I felt guilty about what I'd done to my once athletic beautiful figure. It look I ate my former self.

The people who are most successful on here are the ones who take ownership of what they've done to themselves and move forward it to correct it. Those that blame their medical problems or metabolism for their body size/weight often end up back after a few months having regained much of their weight or quit. They are also the ones prone to the fad diets that wreak havoc on their bodies long-term.

AntWrig

When I was bigger, I was desperate for anything to blame but myself. I felt guilty about what I'd done to my once athletic beautiful figure. It look I ate my former self.

The people who are most successful on here are the ones who take ownership of what they've done to themselves and moved forward it to correct it. Those that blame their medical problems or metabolism for their body size/weight often end up back after a few months having regained much of their weight or quit. They are also the ones prone to the fad diets that wreak havoc on their bodies long-term.

Yep!

kaylz0106

I was going to say exactly the same thing as most people. I am 195lbs and that is my fault no medical reason or family history I just ate far too much thinking I would get away with it when I was pregnant and I couldnt END OF.

I hate the word fat and decpite being 245lbs at my heaviest I have only ever been called fat once and I broke my heart and truth be told it pushed me even harder to get rid of the weight and become healthy (mainly to hunt the b***h that said it and be able to punch her in the face and run away ...kidding..).

i also agree with your observation healthier people do have a no messing attitude, one by the way I hope to adopt. That said, who's to say that those people weren't once 245lbs and just worked their butts off , literally, to gain that attitude in order to avoid becoming what they once were?

snookumss

You are completely correct!

Here's my story and why I agree with you! Nobody can tell me my thoughts are faulty here.


I was 200lbs. My own fault. I lifted HEAVY but ate like crap! I didn't research, I just ate protein and junk food and played video game marathons in my massive free time.

I started off healthy and looking great/fit at 150lbs my senior year. Really muscular for my class, could do pull ups and always won the arm wrestling. It got to my head, and was my excuse for why I've always been bigger. I have a lot of muscle, I don't look my weight. I carry my weight well because of my muscle... etc.

I hit double chin while having a prego phase. I ended up losing it... but gained weight then. I ended up having my thyroid checked, diabetes, everything. Perfectly fine.

I wanted to blame it on those. If I'd had any problems, I'd still be fat today.

bethgames

I am 5'4" and over 200 lbs. I know I am fat. I know how I got here. I like food. However, I also know how to get thin and fit with diet and exercise, which I am doing. Some people are in denial about how they got there (I dont eat that much!!! *gasp* I dont know where this weight comes from), but then again, some people are in denial about being stupid as well. I live here in the US and I am appalled at the stupidity that surrounds me. However, I have travelled extensively and have noticed this trend elsewhere also. Sometimes I wonder if we are so over populated as a planet that there just aren't enough souls to go around....hmmm, makes you wonder. Have you ever met someone who just seemed to have 'something' missing??? My whole family is large as well. Obesity doesn't run in my family, poor eating habits do!

mfpcopine

I think that people like myself, reasonably fit, reasonably thin (I could do better on both counts) people who have never been overweight get most irritated by the assumption of some overweight and obese people that there's no effort involved in staying trim. Yes, up until about the age of 25 I could eat whatever I liked without exercising. But then my metabolism began to slow down and I had a lot of somewhat sedentary jobs or activities.

Whenever I join a site like this, it's always the same questions over and over. I figured out the basics and faced the facts years ago, and I read some blogs that question the conventional wisdom about dieting (if you're eating less than you ordinarily would, or different food than you would choose it's a "diet.").

I try to be helpful, but there are always some people who clearly are not doing even the minimum of what they need to lose weight. If you have a lot of weight to lose, you have to be scrupulous about what you eat and you need to exercise vigorously five to six times a week. You have to assume that food calorie estimates are understated and exercise calories are overstated -- you don't automatically eat back earned calories unless you see a trend of losing weight too rapidly. A lot of people seem to think there's some magic to these numbers, when they are at best guides. You have to observe your progress and make adjustments accordingly.

Some of the same people persist in claiming that they're being persecuted, when I don't know any thin person of middle age or older who thinks that weight loss is easy, especially not for an obese person. One reason I've tried not to gain weight is I don't think I could lose a lot of weight if I had to. It's a monumental exercise.

Every time I have gained a significant amount of weight it's because I ate way too much of the wrong food for an extended period, usually because of the holidays or work stress. I did not exercise. Sure, my weight has crept up a bit as I've aged -- unfortunately, that may be unavoidable -- but it's nothing like some people I know.


I get tired of nonsense such as "Fit at any Size." It's well known that massive overweight takes a huge health toll over time. I also don't understand people who are raising obese children and acting as if there's nothing to be done about it.

It's hard. Our society should provide more support. But some people are in permanent denial.

BTW, some Americans use the term "fat" proudly. It's not always pejorative.

Why I am here? Because it's very easy to let oneself go and at times the discipline of logging my food helps. If I get into a rhythm, I actually will think twice about eating something at night that I don't need because I don't want to have to record it the next day. Accountability helps.

Princess_Sameen

I would agree some people seem to blame other factors but I would say the fitter individuals have come to terms with why they have been overweight previously or what makes you overweight. Let’s face it a lot of people will try blame something or someone else for their misfortunes.

I am big/fat/overweight/obese however you like to dress it up, I know why so doing something about it. I work out 5 days a week and horse ride at the weekends and I eat healthily;lost loads of weight before I joined, the free tools you get with the site was too good to resist

salxtai

Doesn't age play a factor into metabolism? Also gender? My bf eats about 10xs more than I do and is skinny! He also sweats while he's not even doing anything. Meaning that he is burning calories! While it takes me almost 30 min into an intense workout to break a sweat. I am overweight the only excuse I have is because I EAT too much!

Off topic I know... But sweating is not a sign of burning calories. It's fluid movement, that can be caused by heat, exertion and other factors - but it does not mean calories are being moved.

+ 1.

HR is a more accurate measure of how many calories you're burning compared to him under an exercise setting.

donna_glasgow

well I'm not "bigger" any more (i only have 21lbs to go) and I still blame the pill injection for my weight gain (and I always will) ....

sorry but when your athletic and go swimming 3-4 times a week and walk everywhere and the only change you make is to get birth control and you balloon from an 8- an 18 in 3-6 months it has to be the reason ................. Im sure a few will disagree im also sure there will be hundreds of women who do agree ........................ when I asked my doc he said it can affect weight but its not very common .. well Im one in a million haha ...........

Hambone23

I don't think fat people would be on this site trying to lose weight if they were in denial.

ASondel

I think people are so sensitive about the F-word (FAT) and push PC on everyone because they don't want to admit they are fat and actually do something about it. The term for this mass of cells we on MFP are trying to get rid of are called...wait for it.... FAT CELLS!!! Who knew?!?!? lol. I was fat when I started, still am, but am working toward my goal, trying to rid my body of the viscious cycle that is FAT. My biggest problem is that I don't eat enough... I was in a car accident resulting in a severe brain injury and a coma and one thing my brain "forgot" what to do, was tell my stomach that I'm hungry & need to eat. It doesn't even growl. I'm lucky to even get 1000 calories per day, which in return, my body holds onto those 800-1000 calories and I gain weight. IT SUCKS!!!! I have in the past, gone without eating for 3 days before I remembered, due to my memory loss.Therefore, Because I don't eat much, my stomach has shrunk, leaving me unable to eat much in one sitting. For example, even breakfast makes me feel full all day long! Any ideas? :grumble:

mfpcopine

Doesn't age play a factor into metabolism? Also gender? My bf eats about 10xs more than I do and is skinny! He also sweats while he's not even doing anything. Meaning that he is burning calories! While it takes me almost 30 min into an intense workout to break a sweat. I am overweight the only excuse I have is because I EAT too much!

Yes age definitely is a factor. So is sex, because more muscle tends to burn more calories. So, probably, is individual physiology.

You still have to do whatever you have to do to stay trim.


I agree with the person who said sweating is not necessarily an indicator of the ability to burn calories, although you should be working out hard enough to perspire. You just have to gather data about yourself and see how you do. Get a heart rate monitor as someone suggested. Get a scale that provides a fat percentage estimator. Get a blood pressure cuff. Take your measurements monthly.

If you want to keep it simple as I do, focus on logging your food calories. Calorie reduction is most of weight loss. I wouldn't worry about trying to figure out the calorie burn from exercise. Just do the exercise and be realistic about how much you need. Pay attention to your data. Are you losing weight? Or fat? Is your BP improving? Your resting heart rate?

mousepaws22

Hmm, agree and disagree. First, I don't like the word fat, even though I am fat, but I don't like the word skinny either. I wouldn't call someone fat and I wouldn't call someone skinny, as I think they both have negative connotations and I think it's rude.

I'm overweight through a combination of being lazy (I never learnt how to cook and I don't enjoy exercise) and comfort eating. I have a stressful and upsetting family life and have always eaten to make myself feel better. I don't really understand comfort eating but I've still always done adn don't know how I will break the cycle.

But, I do think there is something in the metabolism, genetics argument for some people. I put on weight very easily and quickly, and I lose weight with great difficulty. In 10 months I have lost 27 pounds. At the start of this year I started working with a trainer who changed my diet and exercise routine. I haven't lost any weight. I'm confused, she's confused, my Doctor is confused. I've been tested for medical reasons as to why I can't lose weight twice and they can't find anything, my Doctor actually said I have a very slow metabolism. My trainer has also told me that she does think that genetics play a part. I'm not trying to make excuses because I know that I don't eat 100% perfectly all of the time, and I know that I could do more exercise but I don't do well with being restricted and I find it hard to motivate myself to exercise as I don't enjoy it. That's my choice at the end of the day but I eat better and do more exercise then a lot of people I know. When I was being more strict with my diet and exercise last month than I have been this month, I still didn't lose any weight.

Yes, there probably are a lot of people who do make excuses but I do think that these things do affect some poeple. There's only one person in my family who doesn't struggle with his weight and he takes after his father rather than his mother (my aunt).

donna_glasgow

I think people are so sensitive about the F-word (FAT) and push PC on everyone because they don't want to admit they are fat and actually do something about it. The term for this mass of cells we on MFP are trying to get rid of are called...wait for it.... FAT CELLS!!! Who knew?!?!? lol. I was fat when I started, still am, but am working toward my goal, trying to rid my body of the viscious cycle that is FAT. My biggest problem is that I don't eat enough... I was in a car accident resulting in a severe brain injury and a coma and one thing my brain "forgot" what to do, was tell my stomach that I'm hungry & need to eat. It doesn't even growl. I'm lucky to even get 1000 calories per day, which in return, my body holds onto those 800-1000 calories and I gain weight. IT SUCKS!!!! I have in the past, gone without eating for 3 days before I remembered, due to my memory loss.Therefore, Because I don't eat much, my stomach has shrunk, leaving me unable to eat much in one sitting. For example, even breakfast makes me feel full all day long! Any ideas? :grumble:

you could try making yourself up a tub of nuts dried fruits n seeds at the start of each day and sit it on your table to pick at during the day, that way your not having to think about cooking ... These foods are good for you and high in cals for a little food.

I recently started this (after someone suggested it to me on this site) as I was having problems reaching 1200 cals (I also feel full very quickly) ... hope this helps

mfpcopine

I once took a medication that caused me to gain weight. It clearly had a metabolic effect. I was processing food differently and I had no energy to exercise, which the doctor suggested. It was an elective drug, so after doing some research on the web that included discussion by other doctors saying that their patients were depressed by the weight gain side effect, I told my doctor that I was going off it. One of the best decisions I've ever made.

I would be obese if I'd stayed on that drug. Whenever I take a new drug, I always look at the SEs.

None of the overweight people I know are in that condition because of medication. The people I know eat/ate too much, or they eat/ate the wrong things. After a certain point, it doesn't seem to take much to maintain the overweight.

lsapphire

Have you tried making a schedule (with posted reminders) to eat 2-3 hundred well balanced calories several times a day. Your stomach will adjust with time to accomodate the change.

madamepsychosis

I think most people I've met on this site are very matter of fact and know their bad eating and exercise habits are what have caused them to become overweight. That said, I do see the 'you're skinny, you can't possibly know how hard this is' argument thrown around on here a lot, which really pisses me off. I've never had 100lbs to lose and have never professed to, but the assumption that someone who is thinner doesn't have to work hard annoys me. Not only because I'm sure there are a lot of people who were obese and are now reaching their goals, but also because I know how hard I work and don't want anyone telling me otherwise. We all have different goals, but we're all in this together and I think undermining someone's efforts because they're bigger is just as bad as undermining someone for being smaller.

That said, I have met a lot of people outside of MFP who are very quick to come out with excuses as to why they are the size they are. 'It's my metabolism.', 'It's my thyroid.', 'My whole family is big.', 'I don't have time to work out or cook healthy food.' etc etc. I don't have much weight to lose, but I've got to the point where people have started to notice I have. Most people are very supportive and complimentary, but there are one or two people who, when they ask how I've done it, seem to immediately switch off when I tell them I just ate better and got a gym membership. It's like they don't want to hear that it's a hard graft and want me to tell them about some magic pill or fad diet that makes you lose 10lbs in a week.

LaylaSparkles

I really like this Thread it has a lot of truth to it and it shows how different our cultures can be at times. In England most people tell it like it is....or that is my experience anyway. I was married to an englishman and am now dating another one even though I am from Canada. North America has a hard time taking responsibility for our obesity epidemic.

FAT is fat, no matter how you wrap it up in pretty words and until someone accepts that and looks at what changes need to be made in their lives they will stay FAT.

Thanks everyone for their informative posts here. I often feel the same way.