worst comment ever made about your weight

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  • abberbabber
    abberbabber Posts: 972 Member
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    My brother once told me I should puke off all my fat.
    My old best friends little brother would always tell me to MOVE IT when I was in the way. One day I snapped and said "Why should I?" He simply said because I was fat.
    In middle school while playing dodgeball the coach let us pick our teams. Big girls vs Small girls. No joke - the teacher didnt interfeer.
    I was a "Big Girl" that day. We lost -_-
    I was getting a Sub from subway. This jerk from school was working there at the time. She put mayo on it and I asked for more and she looked up and said "Ky thats discusting." And she put the mayo back down and wrapped up my sandwhich for me.

    I pretty much understood that at 182 lbs and 5'0-5'2 that I was fat. Thanks to everybody for "so kindly" hinting that to me. I am now 117 lbs and 5'3.5 with a massive eating disorder. Are you happy now?

    And that's why we shouldn't assume that "Hey, maybe these things hurt, but they'll push you to better yourself". I hope things get better for you, soon.
  • neti_call
    neti_call Posts: 81 Member
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    I had been dating a guy pretty seriously, and I was explaining to him that the way he said things sometimes hurt my feelings. I was basically giving him an ultimatum: be nice or I'm done.
    He apologized, asked for my forgiveness, and said "nobody is perfect, for example, I still love you even though you are fat."
  • MBuckler3
    MBuckler3 Posts: 22
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    When I first started dating my now husband this guy we worked with (who was easily 400 pounds if not more) said to me "I am surprised he would even be interested in someone your size. I have only ever seen him with skinny girls." I was 180 & 5' 0" at the time. Not even my highest weight. I just smiled and said "Gee, thanks" I then walked away and cried for 15 minutes.
  • megsmom2
    megsmom2 Posts: 2,362 Member
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    My brother died a few years ago. I flew to Chicago for the services and to be with my family....we aren't terribly close, but of course I would be there for this. I hadn't seen my mom in a couple of years (no, no estrangement, just circumstances). I walked into the funeral home and the first words out of her mouth are "oh, look, you've lost some weight". The woman is at her son's funeral, and seeing her daughter and grand-daughter for the first time in a while...and THATS what she's focused on? Cutting her lots of slack for being upset and all.....but still, jeez, is it any wonder I have problems with self-acceptance and weight issues?
    I know she meant to be supportive. She always does. And it always hurts.
  • Littlemisssunshine79
    Littlemisssunshine79 Posts: 12
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    My sister

    Sorry. You can't be my in my wedding group. You're too fat and ugly to be a part Of my group. So I'm choosing both your cousins instead.

    Me

    *stunned*

    I was only 15 when she said this to me.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    From my father:
    "you're getting pretty God damned broad in the beam".

    I was 25. 5'6" and about 130LBS.

    sheesh!

    ps: the beam, in father speak, would be my *kitten*.
  • hellosteph11
    hellosteph11 Posts: 33
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    My sister has always called me fat even if I was at a lighter weight than her. That went on until she moved out when she was 20.

    Then I had a boyfriend who asked me if I was ever "skinny" before.. and said he normally doesn't date fat girls. He wanted me to workout and even when I did lose some weight he would be like "oh you look much better but still have thunder thighs!"

    He wanted me to wear skinny jeans but when I showed him he also replied "Maybe not because your thighs". So haha yeah.. I think there is more?? I just remember those because they were constant remarks by people I thought cared about me.
  • upnorthtim
    upnorthtim Posts: 376 Member
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    From a colleague and friend?......"The incredible expanding Dr. G*******" ........ It did however motivate me to do something about it.
  • butterflygurl49651
    butterflygurl49651 Posts: 11
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    i have been big most of my life as well, but ive had a few comments in school but that was it. not in my adult life though.
  • yaddayaddayadda
    yaddayaddayadda Posts: 430 Member
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    I'll never forget mine!

    I had picked out my prom dress for senior prom. I went for my fitting and brought my mom. I was not a dress person, so this was the first dress I had worn since my mother was dressing me (so...kindergarden? Ha ha!). I loved the dress, and felt great in it! I couldn't wait to show her!

    Well, she took one look and the first thing she said was, "Honey, you really need to lose weight."

    Not the worst comment for a person to make, but coming from her at that moment? I was crushed! I instantly felt fat and gross in it. I had already put my downpayment on it, so I had to I buy the dress even though I felt horrible in it. It made me feel fat and disgusting during prom, and its only now (I'm 29) when I'm even considering trying a dress on again.

    Now that I'm getting married soon, I'm still debating whether or not I want my mother present during wedding dress hunting and fittings.

    I'm so sorry. This makes me sad as a mother. I hope I haven't said things that hurt my daughter in this way - but we all do say hurtful things to family members without realizing or meaning to hurt them. I hope you can forgive your mother. I know she didn't realize how that comment made you feel. You should tell her about this and then invite her to go with you to buy your wedding dress. Give her a second chance. I'm sure she wants to be there with you.
  • absmom85
    absmom85 Posts: 5
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    I've had plenty of em, doesnt matter how thin I had gotten, or how fat I had gotten.
    The worst offenders were the people I worked with, one lady asked me "are you pregnant again? You are getting big" Um no, but thanks for letting me know I'm getting fat. One of the guys pinched my chub, and when I said not to, he said hey its ok, you are just packing it on for winter, I get it, fat girls need love too. I secretly fantasized an arrow in his forehead. My oh so sweet husband decided to ask me what I was eating, and then asked if I really needed it, cause I of all people shouldn't be eating that, and at the time I was 127 pounds, working out six days a week, and a size 6. Yeah, he's a peach. >.<
    There are a lot more, but they are just awful, and I don't really think you want to hear them, they are disgusting...
  • cyndist
    cyndist Posts: 43
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    The worst thing I ever heard was "When is the baby due". That was about a year ago. I looked at the patient and said 17 years ago.
  • saragato
    saragato Posts: 1,154
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    whilst all of the insults may seem destructive they usually lead you to an attempt to correct yourself.

    the worst ever would have to be;

    "you look fine just the way you are"

    Not necessarily true. For me, at least, it just pushed me deep into a depression I had to fight my way out of, and still struggle with. When I was 13, I attempted suicide because of the cruel comments from kids at school. I spent years eating my emotions, which just helped pack the pounds on, which made me even more depressed. It's taken me 20 some odd years to finally get to a point where I love myself, no matter what size I am, because I know I'm a beautiful child of God. And I'd be willing to bet that I'm certainly not the minority in this.

    I agree with this. After the bullying and the insults got really bad in middle school I became suicidal, addicted to cutting, and so anti-social a lot of people thought I was mute. I skipped school extensively to avoid bullies and ended up failing three school grades for that reason. When your self esteem is just developing or is low to begin with, negative attention can drag you into Hell and let you burn for a while if not forever. Some people don't automatically think "hey they called me fat, I'll show them!"
  • catiem92
    catiem92 Posts: 1
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    A couple years ago I got a part in my school play, the teacher was doing the usual "we can kick anyone out if you miss practice, if you're not committed, we'll be glad of the spare room on the stage" and one girl looked at me and said "they should just get rid of the fat people and then they'd have plenty more room on the stage"

    Another thing that bugged me was I always got parts for fat old women.
  • hendrijm
    hendrijm Posts: 27 Member
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    One of the worst things I remember was working with my grandpa at his shop. I had started gaining weight due to a thyroid condition that no amount of dieting seemed to help. I was a size 4 at the time, my grandpa bought a work shirt for me a size too small and commented on how nice it looked if I would lose the weight I had gained. He made comments about what I would eat all the time even though it wasn't different from when I was smaller. The worst thing my family does is make comments about it here and there without realizing that several hormone systems were messed up and it wasn't something I could control. They would say I'm making up the thyroid stuff and it wasn't real. I got this from doctors too. I just decided they are morons and are incapable of real science. I have since then gained much more weight due to these conditions, and have treated the thyroid issues myself and I am working on fixing the rest. I'm getting close, I actually lose a small amount of weight when I go on a diet now among the relief of other symptoms.
  • jml7403
    jml7403 Posts: 11
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    My ex and I were in Florida with the kids and when I got home, I saw he took a picture of me walking on the beach. It was nice picture, I wasn't in in bad shape then. My ex said, "I took that so you could see how fat you are!". I am about 5'6", and at the time probaby weighed about 160. I'm a big girl, and have a really large top, so 160 doesn't look bad for me. This is one of the many reasons he is my EX!
  • changeofideas
    changeofideas Posts: 14
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    i have heard some terrible comments made about heavy people, but i have never heard any said about me, i wouldn't call myself heavy. i have however walked into Torrid (a plus size store) to find my friend who worked there, etc, and i have had a lot of rude comments made about me for being "skinny." it really does go both ways. i know it's sometimes worse for heavy people because it's often cool to be skinny, but bigger people have always picked on me for being small too. whatever they aren't, they will make fun of. it's just a way to make themselves feel better.
  • alicepoppyh
    alicepoppyh Posts: 88
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    Most of the worst comments I have had have been from family, and a few from nasty exes. The one that will ALWAYS stay in my head was from my grandmother when I was about 9 or 10, who told me that she wouldn't come to my wedding if I was "waddling down the aisle". I ended up with very bad eating habits after that and through my teens.

    Some people have no idea what effect they are having. And some people know exactly what effect they're having and use it as a form of psychological abuse. If the former, I'd recommend telling them what effect they're having, if the latter, RUN FOR THE HILLS!

    (And to @auticus at the beginning of this thread, I am so glad that said ex wife, those are some pretty disgusting things to do/say. My boyfriend's ex pulled the same s*** with him and the effect on self esteem is just devastating. Also, love the pic!)
  • BlackStarlight
    BlackStarlight Posts: 554 Member
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    People are mean no doubt about and I feel for all of you. Ive been big my whole life and had to stand against the comments that inevitably come when your different. Boys shouting "fat cow" or some veriation from a car window or whispered breaths. The three that stick with me though are:
    1) my nana seeing me and my sister together dressed for an occassion my aunts wedding. To my sister, you look beautiful, to me: you have such a pretty face. Pity about the rest of you.
    2) My best friends nana: "Well I cant see how you can be a nurse and pound the wards and keep the weight on you you'd be stunning if you ever did anything about it. I mean look at your sister.
    3) my sister once came to see me at work and because Im bigger than her and a brunette and shes slim and blonde when I told one of the girls she worked with she was my sister she asked if I was adopted. Nice.

    Thats always been the kicker my sister is slim and beautiful and Im constantly compared to her. I never blame my sister since shes never once been part of these comments and shes supportive of me so while I hate being compared to her I never blame he for it.

    But top and bottom of it people are mean. If your a bit different it brings grief. Now im a bit closer to what people would consider normal but I wont forget. And I will never be like the people that have taunted me all my life. Never.
  • tjkramer
    tjkramer Posts: 16
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    It is amazing how cruel people can be. In my experience, the reason most rude people feel the need to say things like this is they are miserable about all the internal things they hate about themselves that aren't outwardly visible to others. They are so wrapped up in their own vanity that they know they are mostly empty inside. Because of this, they choose to point out visible things on others that they assume that person is unhappy about to try to make them as miserable as they are.

    I can tell you one thing...when people say things like that to me, I embarrass them so publicly that they regret it and I would hope never do it again.

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