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yoashisme
yoashisme Posts: 48 Member
in Chit-Chat
alright so my husband and I want to try for a baby soon. Well I told him I was going to stop drinking next month and he said he would to. Now today he says why should I stop your having the baby. I feel like if he didn't want to he should have told me that when we had our four hour talk about it. I didn't push him into saying don't drink but now it hurts that he wouldnt stop.How do u guys and girls feel... What ould u guys do?
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Replies

  • GasMasterFlash
    GasMasterFlash Posts: 2,206 Member
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    I'd have a beer.
  • bwmiller1
    bwmiller1 Posts: 98
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    He needs to stop. You're the one that will be doing so much during the pregnancy. He needs to show his support for you and the baby. its a small sacrifice in the bigger scheme....says the guy with beer bottles in his profile.
  • Chairless
    Chairless Posts: 588 Member
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    As a guy, if i was planning to have a child with someone and their commitment wouldnt even go as far as giving up booze with me, i would be seriously rethinking my choices.

    When baby comes, theres going to a lot more sacrifices required than something as trivial as giving up booze.
  • PapaverSomniferum
    PapaverSomniferum Posts: 2,677 Member
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    I'd have a beer.

    Several beers.

    Increases the chances of conception.
  • lour441
    lour441 Posts: 543 Member
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    I rarely drink but when my wife was pregnant I made it a point to order her favorite drink and enjoy it in front of her.
  • vahlkyree
    vahlkyree Posts: 10
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    ....says the guy with beer bottles in his profile.

    This made me lol
  • bcampbell54
    bcampbell54 Posts: 932 Member
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    I think you should postpone the whole baby thing..
  • havok46
    havok46 Posts: 4
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    Both should stop drinking if you are "Trying". It affects both parties, for him it could make the swimmers less, or slower...or both and therefore not happen. Just try to remove as much pressure on both of you during this time....and have fun...and good luck!!
  • sunkisses
    sunkisses Posts: 2,365 Member
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    What do you get if you win this one?
  • MyTime1985
    MyTime1985 Posts: 456 Member
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    As a guy, if i was planning to have a child with someone and their commitment wouldnt even go as far as giving up booze with me, i would be seriously rethinking my choices.

    When baby comes, theres going to a lot more sacrifices required than something as trivial as giving up booze.

    This!
  • bcampbell54
    bcampbell54 Posts: 932 Member
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    Your guy isn't @adrian_indy is it? Because I if that's the case, you probably have nothing to worry about..
  • ThePunkHippie
    ThePunkHippie Posts: 213
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    I'd be re-thinking having a baby with him.
  • cabaray
    cabaray Posts: 971 Member
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    My husband never gave up beer and I didn't expect him to. The only reason to give it up is for the health of the baby (unless we are talking about a lot of alcohol consumption). His drinking had nothing to do with the health of the baby so I didn't mind. There are other ways to show support and commitment that are much more important in my opinion. We both drank while we were trying to get pregnant and not only did we get pregnant quickly, both babies were just fine.
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,829 Member
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    I think you should postpone the whole baby thing..

    Hahahahaha yes.


    No but really, I personally don't see why he should have to not drink at all BUT if he made the commitment to stop in support of you having to stop, it's pretty crappy he's backing out now.
  • Nekhet
    Nekhet Posts: 380
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    He shouldn't have said he would stop if he didn't really mean it...sounds like a lack of communication there. NOW, why would you want him to stop drinking as well? is drinking a problem here? I guess it depends on the level of drinking we are talking about. If he has a beer with dinner or with a friend that shouldn't be a big deal BUT...if he is going out to drink on a bender with buddies for the weekend and leaving you all alone...that would be an issue. I understand the not drinking together because of the baby and if that was the agreement and he is not keeping it...that goes a long way to speaking about maturity and if he is ready for the committment to being a dad. So many questions and also not knowing all the circumstances make it hard to give you a clear or concise answer...I'm not judging him or you...just bringing up points.
  • sunkisses
    sunkisses Posts: 2,365 Member
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    He needs to stop. You're the one that will be doing so much during the pregnancy. He needs to show his support for you and the baby. its a small sacrifice in the bigger scheme....says the guy with beer bottles in his profile.

    But that's Red Stripe. Not just any beer.
  • Diary_Queen
    Diary_Queen Posts: 1,314 Member
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    When I was pregnant, I couldn't stand the smell of alcohol, tobacco, anything sweet or raw/undercooked meat. This might be a consideration as well. The 'biological contributor' didn't quit drinking, smoking or cooking meat in the house, so I barfed a lot and was constantly miserable.
  • SirBen81
    SirBen81 Posts: 396 Member
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    If I were going through a hardship, I wouldn't want my wife to share some aspect of the hardship for no reason. There are more productive ways to be supportive.
  • opus649
    opus649 Posts: 633 Member
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    I gave up caffeine and alcohol when my wife got pregnant. Maybe I'm just a sap, but considering everything she had to go through to give birth, it seemed like the least I could do.
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,829 Member
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    When I was pregnant, I couldn't stand the smell of alcohol, tobacco, anything sweet or raw/undercooked meat. This might be a consideration as well. The 'biological contributor' didn't quit drinking, smoking or cooking meat in the house, so I barfed a lot and was constantly miserable.

    :( That sucks! When I was pregnant the smell of coffee made me want to puke (couldn't drink coffee again for like 2 years), and my work was literally next to a coffee house that would grind their own beans every morning. Effing torture.

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