Harsh words & bashing instead of support & motivation?
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What gets me is this is a weight loss site not a bodybuilding site.
Actually, I respectfully disagree. This is a fitness site designed for tracking food intake and nutrients. There are plenty of people using this site to gain weight.0 -
I'm convinced that you work for the competitor, and this was designed to distract me from work. Dammit!0
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Ouch...nice catch!If you find some thing offensive, REPORT IT to the moderators.
That said, I agree with you: we should be all be supportive of each other.:flowerforyou:
WOW! that is unbelievable how you can type that when you were so mean to someone on the motivation and support board yesterday!!!!
This thread
TOPIC: haven't lost since March0 -
Not trying to be harsh but...
I can't believe that people who have been on here for more than a couple of days actually think that the forums are a good place to find motivation and support. MFP is an excellent calorie counter and database for food, with entertainment (forums) as a perk.
IF you want support on MFP, you'll have to find out who actually knows what they are talking about and add them to your friends list and go to them or to your news feed for advice.0 -
Leave it to forums to prevent me from the productive plan I had for the day... I should have finished my run and my housework by now! Drat! Curses!0
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The only thing more fun and useful than threads bemoaning undesired behavior on the forum are the grand sweeping generalizations and armchair psychoanalysis of said behavior.
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I'm glad we're MFP friends Swanny.
Everytime I see you "whisking" I am too! Uh, I mean, I value your support and motivation.
I think it's time for me to take a new one. That one was from a year ago. Hmmm if I use the same whisk in my progress pics will people be able to see the difference in me between them? Also should I go for "distance" or "endurance" when it comes to "whisking"? ( <---tongue/whisk in cheek comments before I start getting "bashed" on by all the haters. [Sorry had to do that.
]) 0 -
The only thing more fun and useful than threads bemoaning undesired behavior on the forum are the grand sweeping generalizations and armchair psychoanalysis of said behavior.
I
that guy! Let's just head on over to namby-pamby land and find you some self-confidence!! 0 -
Cue the "maybe it's because we're all hungry" response!I've seen a lot worse on other forums. I find people on mfp are generally much more oversensitive......generally speaking.
I was so going to give that response (but in a fun/sarcastic way).0 -
The knowledge I have gained in the forums has come as a result of reading differing opinions and then weighing the evidence presented. It's rad.
Just curious, but how do you "review the evidence" when many times the evidence given is "a trainer I know said" or "many studies show?" Even worse, when it's "OBVIOUSLY,..."
I'm a big believer in providing valid sources, but I find the response usually is, "That's your opinion." when, in truth, it's the opinion of researchers who did methodologically sound studies published in well-known peer reviewed scientific journals, which I listed.
I've learned the most from people who have evidence of their own proven results who tell me something along the lines of..
"What you're going through seems like it could be something like ________, why don't you go do some research on ______ and test it out to see if its one of the things that might work for you. It doesnt work for everyone, but hey- if you dont try, you wont know. But the ________ that you're doing right now isnt working for you, obviously, so dont keep killing yourself by trying to stick with it. Suck it up and get out of your comfort zone. Learn as much as you can about _________. GL."
Its ^ those comments that usually lead me to finding answers that work for me. And its THOSE comments that most people only see the part that says "the ________ that you're doing right now isnt working for you, obviously, so dont keep killing yourself by trying to stick with it. Suck it up and get out of your comfort zone." and call the person mean or insensitive or harsh and dont soak up the gems of info that could change their life.
^^ This! OMG I am the same way. It's researching people suggestions worded in this way that made me up my calories from the lightheaded 1200 calories to somthing more significant, yet still under my TDEE. Now, when I see people complaining that they can't lose weight on their 1200-calorie-diet-i-don't-eat-exercise-back people, I do my best to word my "up your calories" in that format.
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I am so happy to see others that share my thoughts! Thanks all!
CHEERS TO THAT!!!0 -
I certainly ditto that!!!0
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I only mean this half-jokingly but.....
.... some people get fed up seeing the same topics / nonsense / idiots crop up time and time again
.... a lot of people when given perfectly sound advice, say things like 'I don't believe that ( e.g. You should not eat back your cals cos I can SO survive on 500 cals a day) The person who has taken the time to answer them is not thanked but replied to with rubbish like this so they can get a little narky.
.... a lot need their beliefs to be their mantras and their motivation and relish the chance to repeat them as often as possible. They are also reenforcing for themselves as well as answering a question.
.... sometimes with all the chatter on the site from various evangelists (no carb, low carb, any sort of carb, carb, no fat, low fat, high fat, not THOSE fats!!) some people feel they have to hammer their point home with Thor's hammer. So they do.
This is not a fluffy bunny admiration society, it is a primarily a weight-loss site, people here are going to be craving chocolate (or whatever), eating less than they are used to and a lot are hurting from working out. Most are trying to ignore the triggers than sent them down the road of over-eating in the 1st place. Considering all that, it is a wonder there is not wholesale slaughter sometimes :laugh: :sad:
I think that pretty much covers it...0 -
I only mean this half-jokingly but.....
.... some people get fed up seeing the same topics / nonsense / idiots crop up time and time again
.... a lot of people when given perfectly sound advice, say things like 'I don't believe that ( e.g. You should not eat back your cals cos I can SO survive on 500 cals a day) The person who has taken the time to answer them is not thanked but replied to with rubbish like this so they can get a little narky.
.... a lot need their beliefs to be their mantras and their motivation and relish the chance to repeat them as often as possible. They are also reenforcing for themselves as well as answering a question.
.... sometimes with all the chatter on the site from various evangelists (no carb, low carb, any sort of carb, carb, no fat, low fat, high fat, not THOSE fats!!) some people feel they have to hammer their point home with Thor's hammer. So they do.
This is not a fluffy bunny admiration society, it is a primarily a weight-loss site, people here are going to be craving chocolate (or whatever), eating less than they are used to and a lot are hurting from working out. Most are trying to ignore the triggers than sent them down the road of over-eating in the 1st place. Considering all that, it is a wonder there is not wholesale slaughter sometimes :laugh: :sad:
I think that pretty much covers it...
TOM .... I forgot that !
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I'm glad we're MFP friends Swanny.
Everytime I see you "whisking" I am too! Uh, I mean, I value your support and motivation.
I think it's time for me to take a new one. That one was from a year ago. Hmmm if I use the same whisk in my progress pics will people be able to see the difference in me between them? Also should I go for "distance" or "endurance" when it comes to "whisking"? ( <---tongue/whisk in cheek comments before I start getting "bashed" on by all the haters. [Sorry had to do that.])
Whisk heavy.0 -
Hall of Fame thread, right there....I'm getting a boob job and need your prayers...
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Just some people like to say "my bro science is better than your bro science."
haha this made me laugh, it's so true.0 -
What gets me is this is a weight loss site not a bodybuilding site.
Actually, I respectfully disagree. This is a fitness site designed for tracking food intake and nutrients. There are plenty of people using this site to gain weight.
Your right, I think though what happens is two groups with two different goals try and push what is right for them onto the other groups. It works both ways.0 -
i dont bully, but I do get harsh sometimes. Sometimes people that have a history of not being self motivated arent motivated by "awww come on, you can do it, tomorrow is another day" stuff. You need to be told--get up---quit being lazy. Stop making excuses. Stop lying to yourself.
Its not for everyone, but some people need that. As for bashing, it has no place. But in truth, I think the term bullying is too harsh. You cant be bullied here....if someone does, you block them or dump them, problem solved. SO in essence, its more assholishness than bullying.0 -
I recently read several posts where fellow MFPers are saying harsh things to one another or pushing their views on others. Aren't we all here for the same reason? To get healthy and maintain a healthy lifestyle for the duration? The last thing I want to see is someone being put down for trying. There is NO excuse for bullies no matter what age, race, weight, etc. Everyone is entitled to their own views, opinions and beliefs and although you do NOT have to agree with them, please keep your negative and self-esteem crunching comments off and just agree to disagree and move on with your own successes. Now, let's get back to helping each other and MOTIVATING and SUPPORTING each other in our journeys! Thanks, and good luck to all!
As one who got bashed in the past. Totally agree. We are here to help, encourage, and support each other. So lets all stop acting like were kids on a play ground and be the support we would want to get or better.0 -
I'm with you on this! We are all adults here.0
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i dont bully, but I do get harsh sometimes. Sometimes people that have a history of not being self motivated arent motivated by "awww come on, you can do it, tomorrow is another day" stuff. You need to be told--get up---quit being lazy. Stop making excuses. Stop lying to yourself.
Its not for everyone, but some people need that. As for bashing, it has no place. But in truth, I think the term bullying is too harsh. You cant be bullied here....if someone does, you block them or dump them, problem solved. SO in essence, its more assholishness than bullying.
Very true. The self pity and loathers only get to me when I see a thread or post of them feeling unmotivated for the nth time. Only then will I show some tough love. But in message form, not in a public forum. The strong with say "Oh yeah MFer?!", go to mammby pamby land and get some confidence. The weak will say "you're a bully" (which means pity me some more). Just my opinion.0 -
I find that people aren't very open to contradictory opinions which generally leads to hostility. Many people just to need to remember that people aren't always going to pat them on the back. Don't start a forum thread if you don't want to hear varying opinions. And why not be open to other people's opinions because you are likely to learn something new.
I definitely agree with this. It really irks me when people just post something like "If you don't agree, then you shouldn't bother reading/replying", even when the opposing viewpoint was presented in a tactful manner.
I agree with this also, and the thing is it is not constricted to this board but I have seen it on many others. The thing is this is fundamentally a discussion board where we discuss things. To post something and saying that people shouldn't bother replying with opposing opinions you just might as well type it up on the computer and squirrel it away on your hard drive somewhere, at least there what you type will not be open to scrutiny.0 -
There is only one way to get fit. The right way. If you can't get on board with doing it right then your just doing it wrong.
Oh wait, your being sincere. Then yes you can come over and play with my toys.
Why is it that everyone who makes these photo memes has such lousy grammar?
I've wondered the same thing. :grumble:
It's because they are used to picture books. LOL
Dont hate. Animals dont take grammar.
Nor can they spell...and cuz itz hewmerus0 -
I'm here for the pie. And the hardass meanies who pretty much make up my friends list and brook no BS. And...the ladies who lunch. Also...boobies!
I want pie!0 -
Wow, I read all posts to this point, and there were so freaking many counter points I wanted to make, my head is spinning.
So instead:Not every person is born with a supportive and motivational personality.
Some people coddle.
Some people enourage.
Some people educate.
Some people belittle.
Some people make funny jokes.
Some people make mean jokes.
Some people motivate.
Some people teach you how to motivate yourself.
Some people kick your *kitten* cause they know you are being lazy.
Some people give you a trophy just for showing up.
Some people are kind.
Some people are harsh and blunt.
Some people think everyone else is stupid.
Some people think everyone has the potential for greatness.
Some people will hold your hand.
Some people will hold you down.
Some people will raise you up.
It takes a whole village to raise the bar.
Just like in real life.
You cannot force everyone to be the same kind of person that you happen to prefer. You take your motivation and support from those that work best with your own personality. Leave the rest.
Yoovie, this is why you're one of my MFPeeps =D.
And I'd like to add, where's Azackery? I don't know anyone on the forums more skilled at getting people to bash her. She's my new hero though, because when she starts talking about heavy lifting women having man chests, ALL of them change their profile pictures to prove her wrong.
Those my friends, are some impressive chests.0 -
awwww you sweet mfphucker
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i dont bully, but I do get harsh sometimes. Sometimes people that have a history of not being self motivated arent motivated by "awww come on, you can do it, tomorrow is another day" stuff. You need to be told--get up---quit being lazy. Stop making excuses. Stop lying to yourself.
Its not for everyone, but some people need that. As for bashing, it has no place. But in truth, I think the term bullying is too harsh. You cant be bullied here....if someone does, you block them or dump them, problem solved. SO in essence, its more assholishness than bullying.
Very true. The self pity and loathers only get to me when I see a thread or post of them feeling unmotivated for the nth time. Only then will I show some tough love. But in message form, not in a public forum. The strong with say "Oh yeah MFer?!", go to mammby pamby land and get some confidence. The weak will say "you're a bully" (which means pity me some more). Just my opinion.
RANDOM STORY!
I used to have a running partner. I would get discouraged sometimes and would slow down my pace. Mostly I was discouraged because my stupid body is so weak and stupid... but, anyway...
One day while we were running I had pushed myself too hard and so my ankles were all worn out and... I tripped and banged my leg up pretty bad. While I was on the ground whimpering in pain he started shouting at me: GET UP GET UP THE RUN ISN'T OVER! He pushed and pushed until I got my *kitten* up and finished the run... Finishing the run exacerbated my injury but gosh darn it, I finished that run to shut him the hell up and then I couldn't run again for a couple of months as my injury healed.
Sometimes motivation is good but sometimes the wrong motivation can cause injury. People need to learn the difference between the two...
Just sayin'.0 -
For those of you who actually understood what my whole point was, I thank you and commend you. For those who took it all wrong or out of context, maybe you should read the original post again and try to actually think about it from the perspective it was meant. I am not talking about being rough with telling people when they could use advice on what they are eating or how they are exercising. I am simply talking about the ones that have to belittle others for no reason at all and make them feel as though they are less than a human. Nobody on here is better than anyone else and nobody's opinions are better or worse, We all have our own, which is great. I just don't think there is a need to be ignorant and put people down who are trying to better themselves. As far as me saying that we are all here for the same reason.... well we ARE.... and if you read what I wrote to begin this thread I said specifically to be healthy. I never said specifically to lose or gain weight or bodybuild. Thanks0
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For those of you who actually understood what my whole point was, I thank you and commend you. For those who took it all wrong or out of context, maybe you should read the original post again and try to actually think about it from the perspective it was meant. I am not talking about being rough with telling people when they could use advice on what they are eating or how they are exercising. I am simply talking about the ones that have to belittle others for no reason at all and make them feel as though they are less than a human. Nobody on here is better than anyone else and nobody's opinions are better or worse, We all have our own, which is great. I just don't think there is a need to be ignorant and put people down who are trying to better themselves. As far as me saying that we are all here for the same reason.... well we ARE.... and if you read what I wrote to begin this thread I said specifically to be healthy. I never said specifically to lose or gain weight or bodybuild. Thanks
Yet, those that don't agree with you are less than you. As a matter of fact, they're being ignorant.
Well played.0
This discussion has been closed.
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