embarressed of S.O.

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  • doughnutwretch
    doughnutwretch Posts: 498 Member
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    Clearly this person should not be married. If she were truly in it for the right reasons, she should approach her S.O. about her concerns with his weight gain and health, and offer to help in any way she can.

    Personally, I show my S.O. off any chance I get! He makes me look good :love:
  • ReinasWrath
    ReinasWrath Posts: 1,173 Member
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    No way! Have never been embarrassed of him and he never stopped being loving when I was +40lbs heavier. I think anyone who has a S.O who's gaining weight (or maybe even losing way too much) could rightfully be concerned but being embarrassed about it is a whole new animal.
  • pudadough
    pudadough Posts: 1,271 Member
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    My thoughts: she's a bish.

    If I like a guy I could care less what everyone else thinks! Grow up and live for yourself, losers!
  • hollyeverhart
    hollyeverhart Posts: 397 Member
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    Thats cruel... How would she feel if he did that to her?
  • chrishgt4
    chrishgt4 Posts: 1,222 Member
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    I don't necessarily think the friend does have her priorities wrong. Is it nice? No, but that's not the point.

    I love my partner but his total disregard for his health (which has caused him to gain 2 stone since we started seeing each other) is a source of personal embarassment for me, especially when I'm working to try to improve my health. Watching someone you care about let themselves go is hard.

    Yes but do you parade that around other people or do you try to work with him directly on it?

    In the OP, the woman in question didn't parade it around. She simply ducked out. There was no mention of her abusing the guy about it.

    She followed up by saying her coworker would introduce her S.O. as 'fat...but really nice!'

    To me that constitutes parading.

    Ah fair enough, I disagree with that though, I still don't see that as parading. To me she is just concerned over what people will think and is giving them the info up front so they don't do shocked faces when he walks in etc.

    I have to say, if anyone ever warned me that someone else was fat so that I wouldn't have "shocked face" I'd be insulted on my own behalf as much as on behalf of the person I was being "warned" about. Adults learn to navigate the world without a googly eyed, "OH MY GOD - YOU'RE FAT!!" reaction to people who aren't thin. At least adults with class learn that. And anyone who thinks I couldn’t do that without prior warning is insulting me. I'd love to know what her friends actually think about her when she provides these disclaimers.

    I'm not saying it's right, just that people are judging her for being horrible, when maybe she's just misguided?
  • SusanLovesToEat
    SusanLovesToEat Posts: 218 Member
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    Wow, how sad for her. (Maybe this attitude has contributed to the weight gain?)

    My husband of 22 years is a BIG GUY-sometimes bigger than other times. He's totally at ease with his body and has no problem going to the beach or walking around the house unclothed. I, on the otherhand, have issues with my body never go to the pool or to the beach, and never walk round the house in my underwear-even when I'm a normal weight for my height.

    In spite of being judgemental about my own body I'm very proud of my husband and showing him off to my friends (I think I envy his attitude to life). I can't imagine ever being ashamed of him no matter what his size because he's a great guy with a big heart as well.
  • April4th
    April4th Posts: 140 Member
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    Now that I think about it, I think my ex-husband may very well have been embarrassed by me. Heh.

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