Ever asked the husband/wife/SO this question?

kym117

I did and his response was;

'It's easier to love you now because I can tell you love yourself more and that makes me happy'

I absolutely identify with this as well. Confidence is sexy no matter what your size.

I think this is right! I think confidence is the key and I don't think you need to be a skinny minnie have it any size, I just think that as we gain weight we have confidence issues within ourselves which kind of diminishes the light!
I asked my husband and he also says although he's loving the feel of the new curves it's the fact that I am happier within myself.

hedgiie

i believe that action speaks louder, there are things that you can discuss verbally and there are things for which it's better to use your observations.

TKHappy

I did and his response was;

'It's easier to love you now because I can tell you love yourself more and that makes me happy'

My husband says something similar to this. He says the only reason he dislikes seeing me gain weight is because I am really hard on myself, says he could careless as long as I am happy and not beating myself up.

LovingLisa2012

i don't have to ask, my hubby treats me as if i am the sexiest thing around (can't keep his hands off and prefers me running around naked) TMI sorry but its the truth

he loves when i give him strip shows, maybe i can't move as well as fit girls, but that doesn't stop us from having fun with it
also he likes the naked cook and naked barber ( its just us and the dog, so we can do that)

maybe age has something to do with it he is 42 ( maybe younger guys are hung up on looks idk) but i am glad my husband isn't .. my heighest was 312 with him and when we met i was in the 190s ( in 1999)

macylane4

I wouldnt ask that question...everybody has their flaws, and honestly I don't need anybody to put their input in on how I live my life. If your husband/wife doesn't like the way you look, they should leave! i would! I'm harsh, but i've had people put their two sense in when I didn't ask for it, and I realize those people just have self confidence issues!!!
As long as you're healthy, and happy with who you are, that's all that matters!! Regardless of how you look now, or back then! I've noticed you never win when you give someone else the opportunity to judge you!

SuperSexyDork

Even at my heaviest (226) I never had to ask. My husband tells me - often - how beautiful and sexy I am.

^ THIS! My boyfriend pushed me to start but only because every single time he'd tell me I was beautiful or sexy I would tell him that he was blind and I was fat/ugly... I just didn't like/love myself anymore. He told me that I really should start losing weight if that was what made me so unhappy.

emilynicole02

I asked my husband, and he was BRUTALLY honest with me. I cried, cried, and cried. He didn't love me any less, nor was he any less attracted to me. But he had noticed my body was "changing". So now we work out together...and he pushes me harder than I push myself. It is motivating, and it is rewarding to both me, and my husband! Keep up the good work!

This is exactly how it was in our house! Except he's my boyfriend not my husband...yet lol. He also does construction so for awhile he was able to workout with me but now when he get's home he is so pooped that he doesn't workout with me anymore... but sometimes he does on the weekends and I LOVE it! so motivating! (especially because I am doing insanity so i have more built up stamina than he does and i can kick his butt! )

holly3585

Ugh......my hubby married me as a chubby, and loved me when I was beyond chubby just after the birth of our daughter. While he finds me sexy at my new low and toned weight..... makes cute comments about my abs when they pop out and things like that.... but sometimes I wish I had a shallow Hal so that I would have anothe form of motivation. I really do find myself using 'he DID marry me when I was bigger.......maybe he liked that better' as a way of talking myself into my semi-frquent late night binges :-/ My conclusion is its all how you make it. You can consider yourself ahead (or screwed) either way. It all depends how you interperate the situation!

sdavis448

My fiance is always telling me how sexy I am.. I have trouble believing him though. I started working out last week again, and he can't keep his hands off me. He can tell I'm happier now hat I'm losing weight.. I apparently have a glow that he can't resist.

That being said.. he told me he doesn't want me to be "skinny" he has grown attached to my curves

taratam83

Mine says the same thing!! These men... they are more insecure than we are!

thomassd1969

I did ask him that and he said that it was more about the fact that I was trying to get fit and take care of myself that made me sexier to him. He loves to watch me work out or run. I catch him all the time staring at me in gym at the Y. It even makes me blush sometimes.

SPNLuver83

I guess I'm pretty lucky because thin or fat my husband has never kept his hands off me lol. Even when I was at 190 lbs I could just look at him and he'd get hard. So I've never felt the need to ask.

Mrsfullwood

Even at my heaviest (226) I never had to ask. My husband tells me - often - how beautiful and sexy I am.

Same here...When I met my husband I was MUCH heavier than I am now.

ckftwak

Your husband is a genius. What a great answer...

tomakehermine

I did and his response was;

'It's easier to love you now because I can tell you love yourself more and that makes me happy'

best husband of the year award!

kenny_johnson

I was heavy when we met... lost weight for our wedding -- then gained it back plus a lot more over the years. I'm pretty sure she finds my body less attractive over the years. And I'm pretty sure she'd find it more attractive when I lose weight and get more fit. I don't need to ask. I know. But I also know she loves me know matter my size.

_Bob_

I asked once and she lied to me. when she was honest I didn't like her answer.

but then again I'm not really doing it for her approval. it is nice though

sunshinedazed

Oh the stories I could tell... My fiance and I split up a month ago and it was absolutely for the best. For the last few years I had been trying SO HARD to feel good about myself, when he clearly didn't want me. The irony in this is that he prefers bigger girls (his new OMG I LOVE YOU FOREVER is definitely bigger than I am!). A big part of why we split (aside from his pathological cheating) was that he was completely unsupportive of my desire to get healthy.

The girls he preys on are all overweight and depressed and just looking for attention. It's really sad, and I'm horrified that I was ever a part of that, that I ever allowed him to make me feel unloveable, that I went to the lengths I went to to SEEM like I felt good about myself.

Long story short, go home and kiss your hubbies, because a man who can love you from the inside out as opposed to the outside in is worth whatever his weight is in gold.

runnercheryl

I asked, yep. Not long after I started losing, but as soon as it was becoming obvious. He's never made me feel like I'm not attractive and had never given me reason to think it, so I figured why not ask? If his answer was that he found me unattractive at a bigger weight then I should be just as happy - he didn't show it, and he loved me just as much anyway.

His response was that he found me gorgeous and loved me at any weight, but he did say that he preferred me looking a bit slimmer.

Fine for me to hear. I'm losing and doubt I'll ever get back to the weight I was, but even if I did my weight is my choice and I know he'd stick around.

Kris0109

Met current man candy about 60 lbs into the loss. He was always supportive, complimentary and affectionate. That being said, he got drunk one night and mentioned how OK he was that I was "really squishy", all in the context of how much he missed sleeping next to me (he'd moved 90 minutes away and we see each other much less than when he was 2 minutes away). He was trying to be sweet; I felt insulted. Cut to about 2 months later: We hadn't seen each other for about 5 weeks, during which I fully embraced the Zumba and had fewer distractions from eating well, etc. He didn't say anything at first but later commented that I was "wasting away" ... again, he's trying to be sweet, I feel insulted and/or uncomfortable. It's touchy subject, especially when stuff is newish and he wasn't around for the beginning of the process (nor does he know how much I've lost total ... but you can't hide the ravages of 85lbs on a body very well...).

That being said, even with the just losing the 15ish lbs in the time I didn't see him, I felt more comfortable. So I'm not sure if, initially in bed, he was reacting to the loss or the fact that I clearly felt sexier and didn't, oh, say, try to talk my way off top because I was as worried about my stomach (THANK YOU, ZUMBA). Double-edged sword.

What did resonate was when he, Mr. Jiujitsu-alpha-male-of-the-universe-who-makes-fun-of-Zumba asked me for advice on dropping a few lbs. THAT spoke more about his respect for me and the process than any casual compliment.