Fiance tries to stop me going to Zumba?

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  • Kerri_is_so_very
    Kerri_is_so_very Posts: 1,005 Member
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    Even if you are not ready to leave, at the very least I would postpone things. Sorry, the future doesn't sound too promising. Way easier not to do it than to undo it once its done!!!
  • george29223
    george29223 Posts: 556 Member
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    waves his arms around danger danger will roberson ............
  • ProTFitness
    ProTFitness Posts: 1,379 Member
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    You may not want to hear this and you may hear it a lot. But maybe marrage is not the way to go. Live for yourself 1st. You want to be happy. I know all to well about being in a relationship out of convience. Your happiness is what matters! if your not happy dont be scared to leave. So many people stay in those types of relationships because it seem easier. Hell I have learned Id rather be alone and happy then with someone and unhappy

    Have a Great Day
  • PixEm
    PixEm Posts: 190 Member
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    He honestly sounds very controlling and like he is trying to hold you back. I could write all day about this, but I would just suggest really talking to him and tell him you need him to support you no matter what and understand that you enjoy the classes and going out with him on date nights.
  • onedayillbeamilf
    onedayillbeamilf Posts: 966 Member
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    I'm sure he has a nice basement and beautiful chains prepared for you once you're married. If you're a good girl, I bet he'll even feed you now and then!
  • ShaunnaM
    ShaunnaM Posts: 23 Member
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    i would tell him how its gonna be if he don't like it he can leave o deal with it, noone in a relationship should control the other or prevent the other from getting healthy
  • kmcgaw
    kmcgaw Posts: 93 Member
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    Zumba and getting healthy are your priorities and you have to take control of your own life even when married. If he doesn't support that, than you are off to a bad start. From my experience, the best men are attracted to women who are confident. The ones that try to bring you down are harbouring alot of insecurities and unless they recognize that fault in themselves will never change. I have been married for 10 years next week and my husband would never be caught dead taking an exercise class, but he loves the way it makes me feel. You deserve better.
  • ShaunnaM
    ShaunnaM Posts: 23 Member
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    I'm sure he has a nice basement and beautiful chains prepared for you once you're married. If you're a good girl, I bet he'll even feed you now and then!

    lmao i was thinking that !:laugh:
  • GasMasterFlash
    GasMasterFlash Posts: 2,206 Member
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    What else have you done to make him feel this way? I would imagine that he has his reasons.
  • amurdaugh2010
    amurdaugh2010 Posts: 39
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    hey, people, come on. This sounds like a regular insecure guy who just wants his woman around all the time. You have no idea what their relationship is like.

    Do you work nine to five?
    You have three children, are you a budget friendly family?

    Sometimes other factors come into behavior when people act this way. It doesn't neccesarily mean she's in an unhealthy relationship. I would talk to him. See if he just misses time with you, and going out to zumba takes what little time you have together away. Maybe he's jealous that you're going out and he's stuck at home. I would do what others suggested and take walks together and talk. Talking is the best way to work through things. Some times all it takes is a little communication and people feel more secure and happier to let you do your own thing without worrying about things. You know? but they are right, if you don't get into the habit of communicating your feelings together, then things will get worse when you do get married.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
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    Somebody has some major insecurity going on. He seems concerned with you being out in the world, being exposed to DUN DUN DUN other people.
  • meg7399
    meg7399 Posts: 672 Member
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    I find people who are telling you that you need to run and NOT get married are not being really helpful. He is allowed to have opinions and vocie them to you. At the same time you get to be your own person and he should let you. So far it only sounds like he is a homebody and doesn't like you leaving. Do you leave a lot, work long hours, not have places for the kids to go? These are all things we don't know and maybe he feels he has a lot dumped on him. Not that you should every change your habits...but find ways to work with him. Just because you like going out and he likes staying does not mean the marriage won't work. My BF usually prefers staying in...I like going out. When he does go out he likes time with his boys. We make it work and sometime dinners alone at home are the best times I have with him. He is important enough to me that I would never ditch him over difference of opinions like this. Once you have ALL these things in mind then you can decide if its worth working for or not.
  • Dayna154
    Dayna154 Posts: 910 Member
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    Control issues are a precursor to later abuse..
    Talk to him, get some help or be prepared to live your life as he sees it or have a constant fight..
    Seriously look at your relationship.. I hope I’m wrong but do some research...
  • melissanne81
    melissanne81 Posts: 34
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    He sounds controlling. If I were you I'd think twice about marrying him.
  • jaxbeck
    jaxbeck Posts: 537 Member
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    RUN :noway:
  • alexiaans
    alexiaans Posts: 113 Member
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    I dont have any good advice, but trust me it will only get worse once you are married. :huh:

    THIS.

    You are about to marry this guy so clearly its not as bad as it seems right? Just know that it WILL not change without work that you AND HIM are willing to do, TOGETHER.

    Good luck.
  • monipie
    monipie Posts: 280 Member
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    I dont have any good advice, but trust me it will only get worse once you are married. :huh:

    i agree, somewhat. every situation is different but i do think that you need to talk to him and tell him how you feel. he is being a bit controlling. it is best to nip it in the bud before it gets worse. best of luck!
  • chantels1
    chantels1 Posts: 391 Member
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    He sounds very insecure. My BF is the same way and that is why I won't marry him. We recently found out he has Dependent Personality Disorder. I know the stress they put you through when you want to go out, but you need to do it. This controlling behavior is not acceptable, and you are a grown woman. Just because you want to improve yourself doesn't mean you will cheat or lose interest in him! Stand your ground and eventually he will come around. Usually after a big blow up from me, mine comes around, but a relationship is two individuals coming together as a family, and if you can't be an individual, you should get out our you will feel suffocated the rest of your life. Maybe counseling will help him?
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
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    I dont have any good advice, but trust me it will only get worse once you are married. :huh:
    ^^^


    ^^^^This resolve this issue now!...or live a lifetime with a clingy, possessive, controlling husband.

    sorry Hun I wish you the best!
  • LeggyKettleBabe
    LeggyKettleBabe Posts: 300 Member
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    stupidity is not a reason for marrying. please reconsider and dump the controlling jerk.
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