Why can't I enjoy men looking at me??

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mcourtney09
mcourtney09 Posts: 34 Member
in Success Stories
So I went out last Friday with my husband and I wore a sexy little dress that 30lbs ago I never would have DREAMED of wearing. My husband was loving how sexy I was looking and apparently some other men in the bars and clubs were too :)

I got some comments that I LOVED because I never got that attention before in my life....and my husband liked how his HOT wife was getting all those appreciative stares.

Today I was talking to my trainer about it and how it made me feel good and he said it was wrong that I was excited and happy about those remarks and stares and that he doesn't want me to get too full of myself and that I shouldn't be working out so that I get attention from men...I'm married and shouldn't care.

I was quite PEED! I was excited because I was getting attention that I had always felt jealous of in college. I'm not acting on anything...I am just feeling good about myself for ONCE in my life.

I had to vent this...but has anyone else received any negative comments about how good you feel about yourself and how you are ENJOYING attention?....aren't we supposed to take pride in what we've worked so hard for??
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Replies

  • lalapurple62
    lalapurple62 Posts: 42
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    Pffft who cares what your trainer thinks, he is your TRAINER not your counsellor, if your hubby is happy and your happy thats what matters. Talk to your girlfriends and you hubby and let your trainer train you lol
  • scs143
    scs143 Posts: 2,190 Member
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    He's wrong. Forget what he said. If you felt good and your husband was fine with it- forget what your trainer says.
  • happythermia
    happythermia Posts: 374
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    Sounds like your trainer is kind of an a-hole! Maybe s/he was having a bad day or something?

    You've worked hard to get to where you are - so you should be proud! Whether that comes from more attention or whatever else.

    You rock! Keep it up, and ignore the haters :D
  • kelika71
    kelika71 Posts: 778 Member
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    I don't have that happening, so I envy you!

    Why shouldn't you enjoy it?! You worked and earned it! Who the hell is your trainer to say such a thing?! If your hubby had issues with it, that'd be one thing. I think I'd be putting the trainer in his place and tell him to stick to his job and not patrolling what happens.

    Congrats on doing so well!!
  • monstergirl14
    monstergirl14 Posts: 345 Member
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    So I went out last Friday with my husband and I wore a sexy little dress that 30lbs ago I never would have DREAMED of wearing. My husband was loving how sexy I was looking and apparently some other men in the bars and clubs were too :)

    I got some comments that I LOVED because I never got that attention before in my life....and my husband liked how his HOT wife was getting all those appreciative stares.

    Today I was talking to my trainer about it and how it made me feel good and he said it was wrong that I was excited and happy about those remarks and stares and that he doesn't want me to get too full of myself and that I shouldn't be working out so that I get attention from men...I'm married and shouldn't care.

    I was quite PEED! I was excited because I was getting attention that I had always felt jealous of in college. I'm not acting on anything...I am just feeling good about myself for ONCE in my life.

    I had to vent this...but has anyone else received any negative comments about how good you feel about yourself and how you are ENJOYING attention?....aren't we supposed to take pride in what we've worked so hard for??

    Your trainer is a dumbass.
  • blg5
    blg5 Posts: 89 Member
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    sounds like you hit a sore spot with him. He probably had a girlfriend who was hot and she left him for someone else.
  • mcourtney09
    mcourtney09 Posts: 34 Member
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    Your trainer is a dumbass.

    Love this! You've made me smile :)
  • jasper186
    jasper186 Posts: 134 Member
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    Enjoy the attention...you have feakin well earned it. Find a new trainer he is an jerk who doesn't deserve your time!:angry: He should be a source on encouragement not a negative in your life!
  • MonkeyFlower
    MonkeyFlower Posts: 92 Member
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    yup as other posters have said, your trainer is an idiot! you go out there and enjoy yourself...of course its awesome to loose weight to be healthy but hell its also nice to be able to feel attractive and sexy...and for other people to notice! you go!!!
  • focus4fitness
    focus4fitness Posts: 551 Member
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    Even your husband seemed to enjoy the attention you were getting. Your trainer probably has jealousy issues of his/her own.
  • mcourtney09
    mcourtney09 Posts: 34 Member
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    Thanks girls for the comments :)

    Have you ever any had any "haters"?
  • sarahrbraun
    sarahrbraun Posts: 2,261 Member
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    you are married, not dead! As long as your hubby has no problem with the way the guys are looking at you, and you have no problem...there ISN'T a problem.

    I've been with my husband for 17 years...he notices pretty women, comments about them sometimes, then comes home to me. I notice nice looking guys, I appreciate them, then I go home to hubby. As long as you look and don't touch, I don't see the issue.
  • jasper186
    jasper186 Posts: 134 Member
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    At the risk of sounding stupid....what do you mean by haters?
  • mcourtney09
    mcourtney09 Posts: 34 Member
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    At the risk of sounding stupid....what do you mean by haters?

    People who instead of congratulating you or just giving good vibes of your success send out bad vibes or signs of jealousy. They are "hating" on your success.
  • trybabytry
    trybabytry Posts: 181
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    Ugh, he sounds like a bit of an *kitten*. Get a female trainer who will high-five you and say YEAH GIRL when you tell her stuff like that!
  • jasper186
    jasper186 Posts: 134 Member
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    Yes, yes, yes.....I love these people. It makes me believe that what I see and feel is real, not just my image of myself. If you are causing these insecure, petty people that much discomfort by how you look, celebrate. You are doing something right. Keep doing what is working for you and only you. Screw them!
  • ProjectTae
    ProjectTae Posts: 461 Member
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    Wow your trainer said that to you? I don't know what kind of relationship you have but that seems very unprofessional in my opinion, I'd start looking for another. And congrats on your NSV! I'd definitely enjoy it, you worked hard for it! And as for haters other than people telling me 'you don't need to lose' none here.
  • sgv0918
    sgv0918 Posts: 851 Member
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    He's wrong. Forget what he said. If you felt good and your husband was fine with it- forget what your trainer says.

    Exactly this.....Jerk Trainer. Not his/her place to comment
  • kymarai
    kymarai Posts: 3,627 Member
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    Pffft who cares what your trainer thinks, he is your TRAINER not your counsellor, if your hubby is happy and your happy thats what matters. Talk to your girlfriends and you hubby and let your trainer train you lol

    this!!!!!
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,143 Member
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    he said it was wrong that I was excited and happy about those remarks and stares and that he doesn't want me to get too full of myself and that I shouldn't be working out so that I get attention from men...I'm married and shouldn't care.

    Maybe he's jealous. :wink:

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