Respecting men
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make sammiches
OMG! How original and funny!0 -
Rachel! You TL;DR'd me....it was my first.
You're great, men are awesome but damn. That was like a whole 3 mintues of my life if I would have read that.
Sad thing is that I was seriously trying to keep it brief. Imagine how happy my darling husband must be that I've decided to remain quiet about certain topics.
Lmao. I can appreciate that.0 -
Look at fairy tales and why their themes endure. Women want to be the princess and men want to be the hero. Nothing withers a feminine spirit like neglect and nothing withers a masculine spirit like not being appreciated.0
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Us women are all about "me, me, me"... "I'm strooooong. I don't need no man", but DO, DO, DO for me. Eff that. If a man is kind enough to do something nice for you, drop to your knees and thank him :smokin:.... girls want to feel respected, but we never do anything to make the man feel the same. Quit *****ing about what you don't have and appreciate what you do have. Give them their space, do something nice for them, pay for dinner for ONCE, and pull over and surprise him with dessert on the way home from dinner.
A happy boyfriend makes for a very happy girlfriend, and vice versa.0 -
Respecting is never belittling and always having their back.
Never insult your partner on anything you know they are self conscious about (job, looks, whatever it may be) - to me that is the ultimate disrespect.
i agree with this. this is one of the ways I show respect to my lady.
respect isnt something that is deserved or rigthed. it's something that is given as a gift and should be appreciated. i have someone who respects me and shows me she respects me and i will do everything i can to show her i appreciate her for that.
never take your partner for granted.0 -
Us women are all about "me, me, me"... "I'm strooooong. I don't need no man", but DO, DO, DO for me. Eff that. If a man is kind enough to do something nice for you, drop to your knees and thank him :smokin:.... girls want to feel respected, but we never do anything to make the man feel the same. Quit *****ing about what you don't have and appreciate what you do have. Give them their space, do something nice for them, pay for dinner for ONCE, and pull over and surprise him with dessert on the way home from dinner.
A happy boyfriend makes for a very happy girlfriend, and vice versa.
Lol. This except he has to do his time with his kness in the dirt as well.0 -
One of the most fragile things known to human kind is a man's ego. Treat him like you would want someone to treat your Father, Brother or Son.0
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I think that mutual respect in a relationship is a huge predictor of success.
Over the last two decades, men in the media are frequently portrayed as dumb, clueless and almost irrelevant beings, particularly in families. I actually think that constant message hurts. Since the '70's it seems it's politically correct to diss on men, but men dare not diss in women (at least publicly).
Here's to a big round of R-E-S-P-E-C-T for everyone!0 -
Show your love through mutual respect, support, admiration, and bacon. I can't speak for all men, just myself. I pay more attention to actions than words.0
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Trust his judgement - sometimes even if you know he's wrong.
Don't argue just to be right.
Take genuine interest in what he loves.
Give him his own space and time.
Take care of him and do things he asks, at least sometimes.
Show him physical love as well as emotional every day, even if he doesn't ask for it.
Take the initiative to indulge him in conversations that interest him, not necessarily you.0 -
I think many men and women see respect differently. I feel like men tend to see it as a more harsh form of deference while women see it as a softer form. For example, from MY experience, i see a trait of respect as having my voice be heard, acknowledged, and then considered. Meanwhile, many men I know would say that having his voice merely considered is not respect, but immediately accommodating to his 'side' is true respect.
But again, these are just my own life observations, not a blanket statement on everyone.0 -
I couldn't possibly and absolutely agree with this answer any more than I already do. Ladies this is the absolute dead on truth in this answer. Men will love you more and more every day when you don't undermine, embarrass, pick, nag, shrink his ego, not need his help, and use sex as a punishment tool.Here's my opinion on respecting your man.
Shut up!
We run our mouths too much. Being heard is wonderful and I'm not advocating being a doormat. Sometimes giving them the space they need to BE the man...with no lip and loving support...is the best way to show you honor, respect and trust them.0 -
Trust his judgement - sometimes even if you know he's wrong.
Don't argue just to be right.
Take genuine interest in what he loves.
Give him his own space and time.
Take care of him and do things he asks, at least sometimes.
Show him physical love as well as emotional every day, even if he doesn't ask for it.
Take the initiative to indulge him in conversations that interest him, not necessarily you.
Exactly! Lack of these concepts drove me away from my wife of 15 years (now ex). It can't be a one-way street. You gotta give back a little.0 -
Leave the toilet seat up.
What the hell?! Leave the toilet seat UP? I already have to clean man-spray from the 3 toilets in our house and I'm not about to leave the seat UP so I can be constantly reminded of the next time I need to clean them.
My theory?...I treat him, speak to, love and support him the way I want to be treated, spoken to, loved and supported from/by him. We make our decisions together, as a team, with the best interests of our family in mind. We are NOT selfish. We show each other how much the other person means to us every day in everything we do.
We say "goodnight, baby, I love you" before falling asleep every night and thank the other for the good, bad and the ugly. Because those are things that make our world go round.0 -
I think many men and women see respect differently. I feel like men tend to see it as a more harsh form of deference while women see it as a softer form. For example, from MY experience, i see a trait of respect as having my voice be heard, acknowledged, and then considered. Meanwhile, many men I know would say that having his voice merely considered is not respect, but immediately accommodating to his 'side' is true respect.
But again, these are just my own life observations, not a blanket statement on everyone.
Hmmmm...very interesting point. Research does seem to show that men's comments are more carefully considered than women's are. So, maybe 'being heard' is a default condition for men, at least in the workplace.0 -
Speaking for myself. Being appreciated is your spouse or partner knowing you are a good man.
If he takes care of things in the home like minor plmbing problems, electrical fix its, painting, gardening, and helps with the grocery shoping, laundry and vacuuming. Niether partner should get saddled with all the domestic chores especially if you both work.
If you have children," I don't," I would make one day a week "MOM" day and keep the little people out of her hair. Just because a women brings them into the world doesn't mean she wants to be aroud them 24/7 365.
When we appreciae somebody don't you want to do things you know make them happy? That makes men feel apprecieated as well as vocalizing the appreciation.
Respect and appreciation are very closely related. Respect is one of the key components to any relationship.
If you don't have love, respect and friendship, you are going to have a difficult time making any relationship work. If you think your relationship is all about you, good luck with that. Sort of eliminates the give and take a relationship needs for survival.
Of course then there is the old adage that "if you don't respect yourself then nobody else will".
So, we can wax on and on about this topic but gotta stop someplace.
Good luck to all on reaching all your goals in life.0 -
And still, the women can't stop yapping and let the men answer, nor are they understanding the men who tried to ...0
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Why not just ask your SO what they feel is respectful?
For my hubby he just wants me to support and trust him. I do, completely. I show it by giving up all control over finances. He takes care of ALL of it. Ever since we started doing it this way we save a lot more money and yet get to spend on more "fun" things.
I also make sure to compliment him at least once a day. Men love hearing it just as much as we do.
My husband also expects me to basically treat him the way I want him to treat me. The golden rule, right?0 -
Trust his judgement - sometimes even if you know he's wrong.
So.... being deceitful and disingenuous is the foundation for a good relationship?
I feel quite confident that no man I've ever had a relationship with wanted to be patronised in this way.0 -
Trust his judgement - sometimes even if you know he's wrong.
So.... being deceitful and disingenuous is the foundation for a good relationship?
I feel quite confident that no man I've ever had a relationship with wanted to be patronised in this way.
It's not about patronizing him, it's more about not arguing with him, submitting and letting him find out on his own he wasn't right. We don't always have to point our fingers and say "I told you so, you were wrong." or argue something to death. And when he realizes he was wrong, don't gloat. That was what I meant.0 -
Can you love someone you don't respect?
Totally and utterly NO!
Eh. I've been attracted to this one person for a while now even though they did things that made my respect for them plummet like a rock (excessive use of illegal drugs, hooking up randomly, etc). Taking a step back, I realize that I have little respect for this person, however for one reason or another I still have a soft spot for them...although in order to have a healthy, long-lasting relationship a lot of mutual respect is essential. Not to stray from OP's question or anything...0 -
Us women are all about "me, me, me"... "I'm strooooong. I don't need no man", but DO, DO, DO for me. Eff that. If a man is kind enough to do something nice for you, drop to your knees and thank him :smokin:.... girls want to feel respected, but we never do anything to make the man feel the same. Quit *****ing about what you don't have and appreciate what you do have. Give them their space, do something nice for them, pay for dinner for ONCE, and pull over and surprise him with dessert on the way home from dinner.
A happy boyfriend makes for a very happy girlfriend, and vice versa.
Lol. This except he has to do his time with his kness in the dirt as well.
:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:0 -
Speaking for myself. Being appreciated is your spouse or partner knowing you are a good man.
If he takes care of things in the home like minor plmbing problems, electrical fix its, painting, gardening, and helps with the grocery shoping, laundry and vacuuming. Niether partner should get saddled with all the domestic chores especially if you both work.
If you have children," I don't," I would make one day a week "MOM" day and keep the little people out of her hair. Just because a women brings them into the world doesn't mean she wants to be aroud them 24/7 365.
When we appreciae somebody don't you want to do things you know make them happy? That makes men feel apprecieated as well as vocalizing the appreciation.
Respect and appreciation are very closely related. Respect is one of the key components to any relationship.
If you don't have love, respect and friendship, you are going to have a difficult time making any relationship work. If you think your relationship is all about you, good luck with that. Sort of eliminates the give and take a relationship needs for survival.
Of course then there is the old adage that "if you don't respect yourself then nobody else will".
So, we can wax on and on about this topic but gotta stop someplace.
Good luck to all on reaching all your goals in life.
You are a wise, and wonderful man. Your family is very lucky. Keep on being you!0 -
I would have thought what they mean by men preferring to be respected is.....by acknowledging their feelings, thoughts, interests etc. Just the same as us women like to be respected with our views / opinions, independence, trust, feelings, how we interact with men, common interests, doing simple, little things for them without being asked such as a hug or smile or making them laugh.
To some extent, yes. But remember that (most) of us guys are far less emotionally driven than (most) women. So I'd first have to say not to try and treat us like you would one of your girl friends.
To feel manly, and in control of his own life, a guy oftentimes needs to do his own thing, without having to get approval from a woman. Think about this & you might start realizing what the study was hitting on. I know so many men that have to constantly get "permission" to go eat w/ friends, spend a few dollars on something for themselves, etc., etc.--to the extent that any single guy friends they have stop inviting them out because they can't just DO something without asking permission for fear of sleeping on the couch.
Understand that men need their "cave" time. It's how *we* work out emotional / personal issues *that we'd rather not share* without exploding. A man starts to feel controlled, smothered, and claustrophobic when his whole life tends to be one big mission to keep his woman "entertained" for fear of her leaving him. It gets to be a lot of work, and there is where the "underappreciated" stuff starts.
Another part of this was hit on by someone else. Don't ask us our opinion if you are just going to automatically disagree. Don't ask us to choose where to eat if you're immediately going to say "eww, not there!" If you are just fishing for suggestions, ask for ideas. If you ask us to pick, we'll pick, because if we don't then we're considered "indecisive" which somehow translates to "lack of confidence" in a woman's eyes. And that is the kiss of death.
And finally, quit trying to change your man into something he's not. That is the ultimate booby-prize (and happens all too often)--you picked him, then you want to turn him into someone else. Persistent attempts to train your man like you would a dog is why men stereotype women as "constantly nagging."0 -
Trust his judgement - sometimes even if you know he's wrong.
So.... being deceitful and disingenuous is the foundation for a good relationship?
I feel quite confident that no man I've ever had a relationship with wanted to be patronised in this way.
It's not about patronizing him, it's more about not arguing with him, submitting and letting him find out on his own he wasn't right. We don't always have to point our fingers and say "I told you so, you were wrong." or argue something to death. And when he realizes he was wrong, don't gloat. That was what I meant.
Yeah, that's kind of patronising...
Basically you're saying 'I know I know better, but bless him, I'm going to leave him to work out that I'm right'...
I'd be enraged if I found out my partner thought like this. It's the opposite of respect. You might as well go the whole hog, and pat the little boy on his head too.0 -
Trust his judgement - sometimes even if you know he's wrong.
So.... being deceitful and disingenuous is the foundation for a good relationship?
I feel quite confident that no man I've ever had a relationship with wanted to be patronised in this way.
It's not about patronizing him, it's more about not arguing with him, submitting and letting him find out on his own he wasn't right. We don't always have to point our fingers and say "I told you so, you were wrong." or argue something to death. And when he realizes he was wrong, don't gloat. That was what I meant.
I think it depends. On many things, we hash things out, and the compromise turns out better than if either of us had the single word. I choose my battles, but on things which matter equally to both of us (home renovations, for example), sometimes the temporary discord leads to happier longterm outcomes.0 -
Can you love someone you don't respect?
Yes, but it isn't a healthy love. It's similar to a parent's love for a child in the sense that you might not respect them, but see them almost like something to take care of. The dynamic is unhealthy in that, while you may not respect them, you need to be needed or think you can make them respectable. This also depends on how you define love.0 -
Trust his judgement - sometimes even if you know he's wrong.
So.... being deceitful and disingenuous is the foundation for a good relationship?
I feel quite confident that no man I've ever had a relationship with wanted to be patronised in this way.
Again, different angles of approach.
Allowing a person the space they need to walk their own path and learn the way they need to isn't patronizing. It's trust and confidence in where their heart lies.
A 50/50 share of things is more akin to what you're speaking of. Men and women are equal in a relationship. I don't believe that one is anymore worthy or important that the other but it's never 50/50 around here. 90\10, 20\80, his role and mine...whatever the day calls for.
There's something to be said for getting out of the way and allowing another person to find out what they don't know. I appreciate when that's been done for me.0 -
'um, I think of respect and admiration as two totally different things, and that you should also treat your loved ones with respect (as much as possible anyway), but you don't always have to admire them.0
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I must be one of the 25%I read some research yesterday that said if they had to choose, over 75% of men would rather be respected than loved.
Without debating whether or not this is true, I am curious as to HOW men feel respected by their partners ie what can women do to show respect/admiration etc for the man in their life??
Love is more valuable to me. I get respect too, and that is great.
They're not mutually exclusive.0
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