Things you shouldn't say to someone "on a diet?"

starla5881

Last week, after eating some heavy foods on Father's Day weekend, I told my grandma-in-law that I couldn't wait to eat a nice, light salad. The next day, my MIL invited us over for dinner (hot dogs), and said to me "oh, but I heard that you're on a diet and can only eat salads.". So much lost in translation...

AllyCatXandi

"I thought you were on a diet."

THIS.

If I'm having a 12g treat size piece of chocolate, I've bloody well earned it. So everyone else can shut up and be jealous while I enjoy it.

Also, people who give patronizing advice which is both unsolicited AND incorrect are a major peeve of mine. I don't tell people that I'm trying to lose weight, but lose enough of it and they start to notice. Then start to tell me everything that I've been supposedly doing 'wrong'. I may not be absolutely 100% perfect every single day when it comes to food and exercise, but I don't have to sacrifice every single aspect of my life in order to drop the pounds and improve my fitness.

tlc12078

That made me feel pretty bad after so I had a very small piece, maybe a slice that was 12% of the cake, if that. My fiance still had half of it.

I'm sad that you didn't get to enjoy your cake.

Sounds like shes not happy with herself and taking it out on you
I have to second this. It's your freakin birthday! Glad you have a nice future mom in law but sounds like the sister in law might have a few rough edges. That would hurt my feelings for sure if I heard that.

Maybe you should go out and treat yourself to one slice of some really good cake, and enjoy it. You turned 21! Happy belated bday

Thank you very much, the both of you. It made me feel a lot better. Yes...my future sister-in-law is definitely not my favorite person (and my fiance agrees lol) but I don't have to see her much.She eats a lot more than I do and does nothing to keep it off, so she has some extra weight here and there so that makes me feel a tiny bit better lol even though it probably shouldn't .

Anyway, thank you both again Sadly I accidentally dropped the rest of my cake on the way home so I didn't get to have another bite of it. My fiance treated me to dinner though so I was still happy

tlc12078

well sorry got bumped, I wanted to say it sounds like shes not happy with herself and is taking it out on you.

econut2000

My parents who yo-yo diet like it's their job criticized my choices at Ruby Tuesday the other day. I ordered some chicken dish (it's under 400 cals), some sort of veggie and a side of mac and cheese (a bit under 500cals). Mac and cheese is my absolute favorite food and I need to eat it sometimes to retain my sanity. They actually asked me why I bothered ordering a low calorie meal if I was going to get mac and cheese on the side! Well, because I hadn't had it in a while and if I got a "regular" meal I would have been looking at 2000+ calories instead of the 900-1000 I ate. Duh. They think either you're on a "diet" 100% without wiggle room or you might as well go wild and eat whatever you want.

xosmsox

Last week was my 21st birthday and I was celebrating it with my fiance and his family. His mother is the nicest person I know and she knows I've been eating less and been on a "diet", so she asked me what kinda of cake i wanted for my birthday. I told her a mini one lol. So she did! It was only 6 inches in diameter and it was a pretty healthy cake, as far at they could go. There wasn't any frosting, just some light whipped cream and fresh cut up strawberries. I planned on sharing it at my birthday part with my fiance, who would eat half of it anyway. After I got my cake though my future sister-in-law said "Wow, a whole cake to yourself!?" Then make some pig noises afterward. That made me feel pretty bad after so I had a very small piece, maybe a slice that was 12% of the cake, if that. My fiance still had half of it.

Needless to say, if it's someone's birthday or special occasion and they seem like they deserve a treat, don't make fun of them even if you're joking.It can really hurt someones feelings.

What a ****! !

crzyone

My people have been very supportive. However, I don't like it when men (I'm a lady) ask how much I've lost.

smantha32

I'd be telling people to mind their own freaking business. I'm so over people thinking it's ok to say whatever the hell they want to someone else, no matter how rude it is.

Romans624

My parents who yo-yo diet like it's their job criticized my choices at Ruby Tuesday the other day. I ordered some chicken dish (it's under 400 cals), some sort of veggie and a side of mac and cheese (a bit under 500cals). Mac and cheese is my absolute favorite food and I need to eat it sometimes to retain my sanity. They actually asked me why I bothered ordering a low calorie meal if I was going to get mac and cheese on the side! Well, because I hadn't had it in a while and if I got a "regular" meal I would have been looking at 2000+ calories instead of the 900-1000 I ate. Duh. They think either you're on a "diet" 100% without wiggle room or you might as well go wild and eat whatever you want.

Yep. Like the saying, "Oh you dropped your phone. Why don't you hit it with a hammer til it breaks?". We all need a break when we choose to take a break how we want to take a break. And just because we take a break doesn't mean we have to just break the rest of the day either! lol.

mjcorbs228

My mother does weird things.. Any time I'm hesitant to eat much, or eat healthy food, or try to exercise I get the "hahaha! Are you on a diet? Are you trying to lose weight"?"
Any time I have a less healthy snack or lay around the house I get a "you really should eat healthier. How many calories are in that? Get up and go exercise or something."
I'm confused. Do you, or do you not want me to be healthy, mom. Make up your mind.

But then yeah. The tempting boyfriend. It's really hard because we go out to eat a bunch because we both just really LOVE food.

katiedidd66

It absolutely irks me when people say "Are you allowed to have that?". My reply is "I'm 46 years old, I'm "allowed" to have whatever the hell I want!!"

inagaddadavegan

"One cupcake is not going to hurt you."

Uggghghghgh.... YESSSSSSS... "Oh just live a little, come on."

I don't tell people I'm on a diet anymore. They know I'm weird and vegan and have food intolerances, so no one questions what I eat or don't eat anymore. Of course when I first went vegan I had similar pushbacks ... "It's just a little egg/cheese/chicken..." And also I once worked to eliminate processed sugar for a month. If I slipped up, I got chastised. If I stuck to it, I was chided for "not living."

Maybe that is comforting for others who are on any diet for any reason -- it's not just weight loss, seems like people will do whatever they can do sabotage you :P

Debbe2

A group of us are going to a local restaurant on Saturday. I said I love the way the restaurant prepares Salmon and plan to order that. My friend responded "oh no, you don't want that it's served on fried spinach and I know you wouldn't eat that"! Guess what? I am probably going to have the Salmon and enjoy the dish and bring half home for Sunday or else share the dish with someone. ! eat what I want and keep track of what I'm doing so I can make logical choices. This is my choice.

MaraDiaz

Who wants icecream? I'm buying!

Or similar.

dorothymiriam

Gosh, I am SO glad I am here! I really, really love all of the positive support, and being with people who "get it!":bigsmile:

Arexxx

My mum and boyfriend offer me junk food all the time. Apparently I don't eat enough -.-
Just because I dont eat pizza and drink soft drink doesn't mean I'm starving.

sophiathedss

I am surrounded by supportive people...but I get the occasional " can't you have pizza?" and the first time I say no thank you is great...when I have to say it about 4 more times...UGH it gets really aggravating. I respect everyone who offers and realize they don't understand..and that's ok.
To the wonderful young lady who had a bday and her sister in law make pig noises.....wow that's just really...uh....disgusting. It sounds like your fiance made up for it! Happy Birthday!




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cjstagg

Hmm well my husband came home this evening complaining how he's sick and tired of being sick and tired but he had NO idea where to start with eating healthier, so he called his mom. BURN! I guess the food that I've been eating to lose 37 lbs. means nothing... LOL

urasweethart

I hate it when ppl ask how much Ive lost and are like only that much really I would have thought you could lose that in a week easily or say I can lose 2lbs in the bathroom.....
Ive yoyo dieted and Ive learned that if I drop weight to fast I gain back it took 2 years to gain it back this last time when I dropped 55lbs in less then 8weeks. but still I dont want to gain it back so Im trying learn what my body needs how it works

Also any and all food comments: went to the lake this weekend and I made my kids' plates then came back for my own and someone made the comment back already. It made me so self coscience that I stopped putting anything on my plate. I didnt want to eat the rest of the day. & when hubby realised i wasnt eating he set aside some slices of the backstrap for me and as soon as he showed me same guy came up and started eating it i had my slice and just walked away. it really just errks me some ppl make it seem like if I eat anything Im either off the diet (which Im not on Im changing everything in my life to get a healthier me this is a permenet move a short term goal) or not eating enough
OH & the comments of "oh is it really going to hurt you, if dont eat for a day." WTF Really

that and the fact that my aunts are having stomach surgeries and trying to compare my loss to theirs

bpetlock

This is going to sound so bad but when after my first pregnancy I lost a bunch of weight and I worked really hard on it. I was simply practicing portion control and exercise. I went out to eat with a friend who was struggling with her weight and she asked me how I did it and we had a discussion for quite a while. I told her that I was really just mostly consuming less calories. I suggested to her that she stopped eating when I did to help her with portion control. It seemed logical to me at the time that she do this since I was losing weight so well. I didn't realize until later that I had hurt her feelings because after I said this she was like "Well that is easier said than done" and she didn't say anything else for the entire time. I know this is what not to say to someone who is on a diet and my friend was not on a diet, but it was the most horrible thing I could imagine saying to someone with a weight problem especially since I have been struggling so much with my weight recently. It makes me sad to remember that conversation!:frown:

DFWTT

[rant]
It took 30lbs for anyone to notice and I thought that was obscene. It bothered me every day. Now at 60 down, I get called names like "bones" and "crackhead" multiple times a day. It's really starting to bug me. People look at me funny and always have snide remarks when I pull up to the table with what looks like enough food for two. Yes it's a lot of food but ya know it's still less calories and fat than your double fatburger and fries topped with a 44oz side of DP. What's worse is that on the BMI scale I'm just inside normal healthy weight with 11.9 bf%. I chalk it all up to jealousy and laziness from those people. After all, they haven't seen me naked but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to see the McDonald's nastiness that resides just underneath their cheap t-shirt and the ugliness of their personality every time they open their mouth. You all are great; it really is them and not you.
[/rant]

Twomirrors

What a great topic!

Here's what I get:

"You look great, so why are you tracking calories?"
--I'm not really trying to lose more, but I have a really slow metabolism, and maintain my weight at 1500 calories a day. Yeah, lucky you. I know you can eat whatever you want. I can't, even if I work out all the time.

"Want a bite of my cookie/ice cream/cake/etc.?"
--Well hell yes I do, but I don't have any calories left today, so I can't.

"Don't you think it's time you took a rest day from working out?"
--Well, that would be nice, because I'm sore as ****, but then I only get 1500 calories and I'm super hungry on that little.

"You weren't fat / didn't need to lose weight. What's with this dieting?"
--Actually, I was pretty chunky, so please stop implying that I have an eating disorder. I weigh 160 now.

"There's no way you weigh 160!"
--Yes, actually, I do. And I'd like to weigh less so I'm faster on a bike.
"No, really, I don't believe you. Have you stepped on a scale lately?"
--Yes, I do every week. Actually, I weigh 163.
"No way. Your scale is broken."
--*sigh*

"Let me take you out for dinner tonight (asked at 5pm)."
--You know I'm on a restricted calorie diet. If you'd asked me earlier, I could have planned for it. Now, I don't have enough calories. Let me know in advance next time, because that would have been fun.

"I thought you were on a diet? Why are you eating...?"
--Thanks for ruining my fun. I worked out an extra hour so I could eat that, and now I feel guilty.

Hang in there everyone! Just keep listening to your phone, and you'll make it to your goal! You all are awesome!

JulieDerda

My peeve is the general "advice" that some people want to offer me...

For example, I had one woman tell me that if I don't cut carbs, I will gain everything back after I lose it.

I had one guy tell me that exercise only will get my weight off.

And I HATE it when people tell me I will gain weight if I eat after 6 pm.

Believe what you want to believe, and do what works for you. But if I want advice, I will ask for it!!

yes i agree 100%!

CassieReannan

"You want fries with that?" :laugh:

bpetlock

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YfvBbxE1vU

Please watch this. It will make you all feel better. It's Chris Farley, Adam Sandler and David Spade dressed as women at the mall eating french fries. Hilarious! Watch it. It will make you laugh!

bpetlock

I hate it when ppl ask how much Ive lost and are like only that much really I would have thought you could lose that in a week easily or say I can lose 2lbs in the bathroom.....

Maybe whoever said that to you had a similar experience except their brain fell into the toilet while they were standing at the mirror admiring how perfect they are. God people are so mean!!!

JulieDerda

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YfvBbxE1vU

Please watch this. It will make you all feel better. It's Chris Farley, Adam Sandler and David Spade dressed as women at the mall eating french fries. Hilarious! Watch it. It will make you laugh!

i always do this!

Megdmcda

i made a comment one day on my facebook cuz i started eating alot of oatmeal using splenda instead of sugar....well i made a comment about how it was nasty like that unless i could put my 1tbs of butter in it........my cousin told me if i was on a diet i shouldn't be eating butter at all......... i was so mad.......like really it was an extra 50 calories...........blah

bpetlock

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YfvBbxE1vU

Please watch this. It will make you all feel better. It's Chris Farley, Adam Sandler and David Spade dressed as women at the mall eating french fries. Hilarious! Watch it. It will make you laugh!

i always do this!

Doesn't it just make you want to squirt milk out of your nose when you watch it (even when you're not drinking milk) LOL! I love that skit!

Ariberri9

"You're dieting? Here's what you need to do..."

Hush. You're not even dieting. My way is working; I've lost 13 pounds and look and feel fantastic. Be quiet...I've got this. if I need your help, I'll politely ask for it.

"But you don't need to diet! People already think you're hot and skinny."

Be quiet. My health is terrible, according to my doctor. I'm doing this for myself, not for anyone else. I want to improve myself FOR myself, not to be hot.

"You're eating way too much for that to be considered a diet."

I eat 1370 calories a day. That's perfectly acceptable. Starving yourself does not improve your health.