How long were you with your SO before you got engaged?
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Our 5 year anniversary is on July 1st. No plans to get married. I was married at 21 and divorced at 24 so I'm in no hurry to get married again. I met my man a few months after my divorce was final. He knew that I had some emotional baggage to deal with surrounding my divorce and has been wonderful help teaching me to trust people again. We have both seen people get married and divorced all too often, to the point that it takes a little away from the meaning of marriage. The way I see it, I'm not going to ruin a wonderful relationship by taking it to the next level when that next level isn't really a necessity for us. We have lived happily and in love for the past 5 years without a marriage certificate. Hang in there! Have you told him how you feel about it? (I'm sorry I haven't read through all 8 pages of responses. LOL)0
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Okay this is going to sound weird, My husband asked me to marry him only after 2 weeks. O_o....We were married a month later. We have been married for just over 2 years but still feel like newly weds. This is my second marriage and I have finally found the one.
Time doesn't matter nor does our stories...If you believe you should be married with this man it will happen, if you want it to happen quickly maybe ask him....Good luck and I hope you find the answer you want.0 -
RedSunshine36, my brother met his wife inder the exact same circmstances! I'd accuse you of being my sister in law but they just celebrated 13 years of marriage yestetday!
Been with my fiancee over 2 yrs. We are getting married this July. When it's the right person, you know.0 -
We were together for a year and a half. And now a year and a half later, we're still engaged..0
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6 months! and we have been married for almost 5 years
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i know what it feels like to be in your shoes. I was with my ex for 6 years and it seemed like everyone around us was getting married besides us =( ...
eventually we broke up for many reasons....
6 months later i found myself head over heels with whom is now my husband. at the time, the last thing i wanted was another relationship but he was just to good to be true and i couldn't let him pass me by...
we did long distance for the majority of the time which i also never thought would work but when you find the right person anything is possible...
10 months later we were engaged, 2 moths after that we were legally married and then had our actual wedding 5 months after that because of the long distance thing and me having to stay in my town to finish my BA.
we have been married for a year and a half now and together for 2.5 ...
things are different for everyone and timing is everything! ...0 -
We were together 3.5 years before getting engaged, but by the time we get married, we will have been together 5 years.
As for the buying a house, I'd recommend really thinking about that one if you aren't married by then. Only because if something does happen and you split ways, it's much, much messier if you're both on the mortgage and not married; I've had friends in that situation and it was horrible for them. Just something to think about (and yes, I realize that wasn't your question, so I apologize if I overstepped on my answer!)
Best of luck to you!0 -
Time makes no difference in my opinion. We knew each other moments - one smile - and I thought "Learn his name, because you will marry him" and he says that I reacted that way because his smile meant "Let's marry first and then find out about each other". The important thing is that we both knew immediately, and we had both had two previous "engagements" with other people, and we both broke off the other relationships because we knew something was not right. We told our respective families after 3 weeks, got married 8 months later, and have celebrated 32 years. We still celebrate the day he smiled as our anniversary. We raised two wonderful boys together, worked together for 20 of those years - try 24/7!!!!! - and we have handled life-threatening illness, a car accident that took two years of surgery and a lifetime to recover from, and two financial devastations. The amount of time together has far less impact on your future than the level of commitment each of you brings. If you are equally committed and both are willing to be part of the solution for each trouble-spot, you can make it long term. If you believe that he shares your values for the long haul, ask him to marry you. Forget what "time it is" and think "this is what we can do" if we do it together.0
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Together about one month before starting to talk marriage. Moved in after almost 1.5 years.
He popped the question shortly after our 1.5 year mark. Long engagement, unfortunately. Proposal was on 09/09/09 and we still haven't set a date. We're both going to school (we are each 25) and want to be at least almost done with our degrees. I can't wait- i've already tried on dresses and have pretty much planned the whole thing
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My wife and I dated for a year and 3 months prior to my proposing. Today is our 15th wedding aniversary.0
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We were together 3.5 years before getting engaged, but by the time we get married, we will have been together 5 years.
As for the buying a house, I'd recommend really thinking about that one if you aren't married by then. Only because if something does happen and you split ways, it's much, much messier if you're both on the mortgage and not married; I've had friends in that situation and it was horrible for them. Just something to think about (and yes, I realize that wasn't your question, so I apologize if I overstepped on my answer!)
Best of luck to you!
You haven't overstepped. I appreciate the advice!
I know it can get messy which is one of my reservations. We will see what happens! 0 -
I understand how you feel, I am seeing all my friends and familly getting married or engaged or buying houses or having babies and sometimes it makes me very depressed.
But I tell myself that my boyfriend wants to make the demand perfect so he is waiting for the perfect time. But I will admit that everytime there is something special on our agenda, trip, visit, romantic dinner, I always have a little voice in my heart saying, tonight might be the night. Sometimes after a wonderful night of hoping we go home and nothing... I feel depressed and unwanted but I know it's me.
Tell yourself that when the time comes you will be extremely happy because you know he is the one (I'm a little girl that still believe in the one true love) and you were strong enough to wait for what you wanted!!!
When you see a friend getting engaged, think about what you have that she/he doesn't.
Hang on and it will happen!
My boyfriend and i haven't been together as long as you and yours have, but I know the feeling. There was a nice date to Red Lobster, countless romantic movies with cuddles. Oh well. Like you say, it'll happen one day. 0 -
We have discussed it and he knows what I want. He also knows that I want to be engaged at least before we move in together. He doesn't have a problem with marriage or engagement either (at least he says he doesn't), so I don't know what the issue is. We talk about it a lot actually.
Maybe there's a reason he wants the house first? Maybe you'll walk in and see a little velvet box on the bed you share?0 -
We were together 5 years and we had a house before we got engaged!0
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We dated about 2 years before we got engaged, then got married like 6 months later...I'm 22 and have been married almost 3 years (November 1st)
Every time I tell people that I'm married, their first reaction is 1. their priceless face and 2. How old are you?
then when they hear almost 3 years they freak out.
hey, when you know, you know and we knew so we just did it!
I didn't read the whole thing or other posts but hopefully you've talked about it at least....let him know it's on your mind. My hubby and I talked a lot about it before he actually did it which takes the pressure off of him and you because you both know where you stand and when he asks he's not as nervous you'll say know and it won't be a complete shock to you if you didn't want it
edit - I guess I should point out that I wasn't pregnant either...and still no kids, waiting until I graduate college and get a job in the field. that's another reaction I get "oh, you must've been pregnant" haha nope, just love each other and knew we'd spend the rest of our lives together 0 -
Me and my husband dated for a year, but after 6 months together, we knew we wanted to spend the rest of our life as a couple. I was 21 and he was 25. It will be 10 years in Dec that we will be married. We have two children 6 and 3 and I would not change anything.We are happy.
Everyone is different. Sometimes you know right off hand, sometimes it takes a while, but when you know, you know. Do what you feel in your heart.0 -
5 1/2 years. I gave him until I finished grad school to propose...he delivered 2 months early We got married 8 months later. 0
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4months, moved in together after 2months, now been married almost 11yrs. Everyone is different - do what is right for you.0
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8 years!0
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6 years...had a house and two kitties. I was 23 and he was 24. Year 7 he started sleeping with an 18 year old. Trust me....WAIT! you are both still too young to make this sort of commitment!0
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About 6 months with my soon-to-be ex-husband :huh:0
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We dated for 8ish months before we got engaged. Our engagement lasted 7ish months. We bought and moved into our house 6 weeks before the wedding. We were both 28 when we got married.0
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I was 19, and he was 24 when we met.. we got engaged 2 months later.. got married 1 month after that. About to celebrate our 12th wedding anniversary in August. 0
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About 2 1/2 months. We were friends for 3 years before that though. When we got married, we had only been together for 11 months.0
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About 6.5 years when we decided to go for it - two weeks later, we were married (neither of us wanted a wedding, we just wanted the legal ability to take care of each other in the event of an emergency, and there had been an object lesson driving home that very point not long before).0
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Just over a year and we've been married 2.5 years now. We still wouldn't be married now but immigration restrictions meant tying the knot prematurely or ending our relationship, so I'm very happy we took that step!0
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Six months, and not an ounce of regret. Most amazing and natural choice I have ever made.
ETA: We got married a month after we got engaged. I also moved in after about three dates. It's just how we work, and boyyy does it work. 0 -
Got together when she was 18 and I was 20, moved in togther 6 months later, engaged 6 months after that (so 1 year in), married a little less than 2 years later. Been married for 7 years this Nov, and never been happier.0
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Five years but still are not married, have been together for 10 years. My philosophy why try to fix what is not broken. But I do understand I just wanted the ring on my finger.... and now that I have lost weight it does not fit LOL .... he still does!0
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We met in November 2005 and were married September 2006. I knew he was the man for me! 0
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