Not attracted to overweight women = "shallow"?

cheerforsteelers

I think people forget you can respect and think all bodies are beautiful without being attracted to all bodies. I personally am not really attracted to super skinny men. Not my thing. Doesn't mean I have a problem with their body, it just means when looking for a partner, I may not be sexually interested in someone like that.

^ THIS! I agree.

kekl

I don't think it's shallow.

I think there's a lot of factors to attraction... Everyone has their own preferences- short, tall, fat, thin, long hair, short hair, what have you. Then, I think biologically we are (to some extent) attracted to features that "help" procreation - Stereotypical examples being Curves on a woman, muscles on a man. Then of course, if our personalities 'click' with another person we are likely to view them as more attractive.

Just my two cents.

missypoo1974

My opinion is this.....if you aren't attracted to a bigger woman (or man), fine. If you are, fine. What I take issue with is men (or women) who make fun or complain how "ugly" or "disgusting" a bigger person is. I am losing weight because I want to be comfortable. My husband likes me just like I am but he says he will be happy if I am smaller - not because he is unhappy with me but simply because he knows that I will be happier. There have been many instances in my past where I ended up being interested in someone after I got to know them. I wasn't immediately drawn to their physical appearance but I didn't shut them out because of it. I guess I just feel that people should be respectful of other people....whether or not they are attracted to them. Just my take.

gogophers

I'm attracted to pretty faces/smiles. I don't think that means I'm "shallow". It's just what I'm attracted to. Similarly, I think some people aren't attracted to overweight women and that's no different.

In fact, now that I think about it, it may be even more shallow to be attracted to pretty faces than to base attraction on weight because someone's weight often tells you at least a little about their personality because it is something they can control.

Interestingly, because girls with pretty faces come in many different sizes, I've discovered through trial and error that overweight girls are generally less willing to flirt and are significantly more defensive (that's not really the right word, but I can't think of a better one right now) when I try to talk to them. Perhaps people who aren't attracted to overweight women are able to sense this and that may be a contributing factor to why they are not attracted to overweight women.

fairestthings

For me weight shows how a person cares about themself as well as their interests. If an overweight male were to ask me out when I was single, I'd say no. If I didnt already know him as a friend, chances are our hobbies and interests would collide enough to cause a severed relationship anyway.

I don't think it's shallow whatsoever. When I was single I didn't expect men to find me attractive if I didn't try. Just as I dot expect my husband to think I'm always wonderful if I just always sit around and binge. (This is disregarding those with health issues that forces them to gain weight!)

claw0416

I don't think it is shallow..It is all about preferences for most..But there are some jerks out there that have a certain preference and act like jerks to others who aren't within that catagory..
After my divorce 6 years ago, I was back in the dating game..I went from being 104 lbs at the beinning of my marriage in 98, to being at 381, after two kids, death of a child, and diagnosis of PCOS..Anyway. I busted my butt to start losing the weight..I got down to 200-220..Not where I wanted to be..Hell when I first started gaining the wieght in the begging I had a cow about bneing at 145...Now I wish I could be even remotly close to it..Anyway..I did start dating again..very hard..most men are not attracted to the plumper side..And if they are..Am I attrated to them? I stopped l ooking..I just wanted to go out and have fun. I found being overweight did not stop me from getting attention...I still had alot of attention..I think it all how you carry yourself and your personality...you carry yourself like a fat slob then that is what others see..you carry yoruself like a diva then they see you as that.. I am the middle road person..I am very self copnscience about my weight and what I wear..Can't stand going out in public with clothes clinging to my roles..(gross) and seeing my fat juggle..not gonna happen...That crap makes the fat population look even worse..But I don't wear thing that put me out there either..I see alot of big women that look awesome and their personaltiies shine..I like that..
For me I am very fortuate that I found someone who fell in love with ME not my weight,.. I am about the same weight I was when we started dating..We dated a year before getting married..And I still have issues with why he loves me..I can't understand how he can be attracted to someone like me, with my weight..I am disgusted with myself..How can he love me? But he does. He is know the limits of when to give me advice on weightloss and training..Even though Is hould be listening to him, he is a Army ranger, so he trains and works out constantly..But he know I have to do this in my own way..

Ayway..I really think it is about how you carry yourself and perfrences..Not shallowness..You just need to be kind about the way you turn someone down..or show you are not attracted to the,,Friends are always good..And KARMA does come back to bite you in the *kitten* in the end..:)

Canadien

I don't think it's shallow at all. You can't help what you're attracted to. ALTHOUGH, perhaps if someone who isn't really attracted to overweight people became friends with one, and really liked their personality, they can start to be attracted to them... Does that make sense?
All I'm saying is if someone first meets someone else, the first thing they see is appearance. If someone is fit, not only does it look good, it also means they are healthy and take care of their body. However, if the person is overweight, it says something totally different.

smartmom0818

Well, it's not shallow because you have to date who you're attracted to. I am only attracted to big men. Always have been, even when I was smaller. I also like my men dark skinned. So I married one and I love it. It's just what I like. So, in the past when thin men have tried to talk to me I am honest with them, it's not my thing. Shallow? Nope. Honest. I have also had guys inform me that they didn't do big girls. Cool, no prob. on to the next one. As long as people are respectful, it doesn't matter to me.

Drop_it_Like_Its_Hawt

I think at one point I used to think that a guy who didn't like a woman because she was heavy was shallow, but that was mostly because it just hurts being rejected for any reason. I realize now that it's not that they don't like you as a person - they just don't see you as a compatible romantic partner. And it makes sense! If a guy (or girl) is fit, or very health-conscious in general, why wouldn't he expect the same of a partner? There's a good chance that dating someone considerably out of shape would hinder their own lifestyle - if they like doing athletic activities, for instance, and don't want to be constantly slowing down for someone. Plus they'd want someone who would consider their health a high priority, and someone who is significantly overweight usually has their priorities elsewhere (and I'm saying this as someone who IS significantly overweight, so admittedly that was my fault).

It's no different than a guy who really wants to have kids down the line, and doesn't want to date a woman that hates being around children. Or someone who farms for a living not wanting a partner that never wants to leave their apartment in the city.

essjay76

Not shallow at all. It IS shallow if that's the only reason you would stay with a physically attractive jerk or stuck up *****. Preference is preference... you can't help what you're attracted to. Some men love thick women. Nothin' wrong with that.

Of course we're gonna get all the thick women respond to this post like they've been insulted. No one is insulting anyone here... the man is simply saying he'd have a preference for thin women. Absolutely nothin' wrong with it.