More office pet peeves....

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  • y0mbo
    y0mbo Posts: 43 Member
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    I also seriously hate people who really hammer their keyboard when they type. There is no need to bash the space bar so hard that the whole building can hear you.

    You'd hate me then, I PURPOSELY bought a loud keyboard (because it has mechanical keys, and I can type faster with it).


    Above all, thank goodness I work at home. I don't miss any of these annoying people at all.
  • weeblex
    weeblex Posts: 412 Member
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    The fridge thief...

    i work hard to make nice healthy lunches for myself each day...shame i only get to eat them every other day.

    I did notice the gal in accounting is looking healthier, bet it's her....

    Put a note in the fridge "To who ever is stealing my lunch. One in three lunches now include ex-lax. Do you feel lucky today?"
  • glonigan
    glonigan Posts: 82
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    The "supervisor" that responds to legitimate questions with non-related questions and then casts doubt on his responses before he walks away from the meeting to take an important call. I figure his phone must be on silent or something because we never here it vibrate.

    ( BTW - I'm laughing loudly at my cube this morning reading all of these and thinking of changing my out of office message, while I call my wife and talk baby talk to her about how the world is coming to an end at this company as I scrape every last bit of yogurt out of the bowl.)
  • chocolateandpb
    chocolateandpb Posts: 453 Member
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    Oh man, I could go on ALL DAY about this topic, but I'll start with one woman in the cube next to mine. She's a highly functioning alcoholic and she's DRAMA. She got divorced 7 years ago and hasn't gotten over it - she talks about it constantly, to me, and to anyone who will listen, and she calls her ex husband like 6 times a day "to talk about their daughter". Her daughter is 9 and is probably f***ed up for life because of her crazy mother. This woman usually quietly stumbles in around 9-9:30 (the rest of us start at 7:30-8), then goes down to the cafeteria for breakfast. She sneaks out at 5, or earlier depending on whether or not the boss is here, yet always claims to have worked 40 hours per week. She often comes in even later and blames it on her daughter.

    Last week she came in limping and said she had done something to her foot but wasn't sure what. A couple days later, she admitted to me that she had tripped when she was super drunk and had still been drunk when she came to work the next day! Okay....and you're DRIVING like this?! And driving your daughter to daycare, no less?!!!

    She is a complete brown noser with our boss and is ALWAYS in her office with the door closed, which makes it impossible for the rest of us to get in there to speak with our boss when we need to.

    Last Friday afternoon I caught her sleeping! Yet she's always SOOOOO busy and stressed out and overwhelmed...b****, please, get some help and get over yourself. She's moody as hell and although she can be very nice at times, usually it's drama, drama, drama and I just try to imagine I'm in an impenetrable invisible egg and her bad vibes can't get through my shell.
  • Im_NotPerfect
    Im_NotPerfect Posts: 2,181 Member
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    Co-workers who think they know how to do your job better than you do!
  • Meatsies
    Meatsies Posts: 351 Member
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    1. Filthy b!tches in the bathroom. Have found everything from a full blown mat of pubic hair on the floor in front of the toilet to blood drips on the floor to a seat that looks like some chick gyrated her hips while peeing to ensure that every bit of the seat was covered. Nasty. Nasssssssty. Wenches.

    2. The woman who sits across from me and spends all day...literally all day...on the phone for personal phone calls or looking at houses online. She was supposed to retire two years ago, but never did. She's the reason the company can't hire me outright (I'm a contractor and losing my position in October). If she would just LEAVE, they would be able to hire me within the budgeted head count. I do more work in one hour (even playing on MFP) than she does in a full week. No joke. Stop looking at houses online and BUY one already. Preferably in Tennessee. Far, far away.

    3. Same woman as above. Different complaint. Noisy eater. Way noisy eater. I'm talking slurping and gulping and choking and grunting (FULL-OUT GRUNTING!) while she eats. Makes my stomach flip over every time. Blerrggh. And she's always talking to Jesus. For example, a conversation I just heard: "Mike, how old is your daughter now? Three years old? Oh, Father God, oh Jesus, isn't that wonderful. Three years old." (Keep in mind that Mike is walking away now...the conversation does NOT stop, however.) "Imagine that. Three years. Sweet Jesus. Jesus, Jesus. Three years old. Oh, Father, they do grow up fast. My grandbaby gonna be 1 next month. Father God, oh Jesus, they do grow. They sure do. Sweet Jesus." Nothing against Jesus, but please keep your thoughts to yourself. It's not a conversation anymore when the other person has walked away.
  • pagingdoctork
    pagingdoctork Posts: 40 Member
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    1. Filthy b!tches in the bathroom. Have found everything from a full blown mat of pubic hair on the floor in front of the toilet to blood drips on the floor to a seat that looks like some chick gyrated her hips while peeing to ensure that every bit of the seat was covered. Nasty. Nasssssssty. Wenches.

    2. The woman who sits across from me and spends all day...literally all day...on the phone for personal phone calls or looking at houses online. She was supposed to retire two years ago, but never did. She's the reason the company can't hire me outright (I'm a contractor and losing my position in October). If she would just LEAVE, they would be able to hire me within the budgeted head count. I do more work in one hour (even playing on MFP) than she does in a full week. No joke. Stop looking at houses online and BUY one already. Preferably in Tennessee. Far, far away.

    3. Same woman as above. Different complaint. Noisy eater. Way noisy eater. I'm talking slurping and gulping and choking and grunting (FULL-OUT GRUNTING!) while she eats. Makes my stomach flip over every time. Blerrggh. And she's always talking to Jesus. For example, a conversation I just heard: "Mike, how old is your daughter now? Three years old? Oh, Father God, oh Jesus, isn't that wonderful. Three years old." (Keep in mind that Mike is walking away now...the conversation does NOT stop, however.) "Imagine that. Three years. Sweet Jesus. Jesus, Jesus. Three years old. Oh, Father, they do grow up fast. My grandbaby gonna be 1 next month. Father God, oh Jesus, they do grow. They sure do. Sweet Jesus." Nothing against Jesus, but please keep your thoughts to yourself. It's not a conversation anymore when the other person has walked away.

    I'm DYING! The last one is so funny! The things we all put up with for petty cash, eh?
  • gkwatra
    gkwatra Posts: 431 Member
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    Hahaha!!! Love it! Where I work, apparently there was one woman (she doesn't work there now, gee, I wonder why?) who thought everything in the fridge was free game for her taking. About once a month one of the warehouse workers would put on an awesome BBQ with chicken and burgers ... one time she took half the meat before it was cooked and hid it under her desk to take it home. Another time, she told another girl, "Hey I drank your last SlimFast so you'll need to buy more." Funny thing is, if you tried to take something of hers (just give her a taste of her own medicine), she would let all hell break loose. The sense of entitlement some people have really blows my mind.

    At a previous place I worked, I swear one guy never wore deodorant ... I walked past my boss's office one day and smelled the rauchiest BO smell. I backtracked a little because I knew it couldn't be my boss, and saw this guy sitting in his office, arms lifted up, resting his hands behind his head while talking to my boss. Does he really have no idea???? :grumble:
  • mommasox
    mommasox Posts: 97 Member
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    My co-worker HUMS all friggin day!!! :noway: :grumble: :explode:
    I want to stab her with a fork
    Yes... this. I used to have a coworker who hummed all day. WTH??? We also had the loud laugher. Umm hello??? Your in a work place and a call center no less.
  • mommasox
    mommasox Posts: 97 Member
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    Low talkers.
  • louised88
    louised88 Posts: 159
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    I'm the only woman in the department, so all the men assume I'm their secretary. (I'm not a secretary). They call me when their printer needs paper or toner and when they need someone to run down to the mail room and post a letter. If I can put paper in my own printer, why can't they? And after years of working together, in the same department and going to constant meetings where we all talk about the projects we're working on - how do they not know that I'm not their secretary?? The most annoying guy brought his daughter to work and introduced me as "her job is to take care of us." WTF!

    Ok, that goes past pet peeves and straight into offensive as *kitten*. I hope you don't go to mail room or whatever for them?

    I'm actually impressed you didn't punch that last guy.
  • delilah47
    delilah47 Posts: 1,658
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    The person who burns popcorn in the microwave and stinks up the whole building. And whoever it was who cooked raw fish in there, you are an idiot.
  • kariebo
    kariebo Posts: 101
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    The recent college grad who has informed you that they know sooooo much and that they want a pay raise... oh and that they have nothing more to learn from your group even though they got there a month ago...REALLY?? How about some professional development??


    The loud eater... i mean the CHOMPER, bowl scraper, teeth sucker ... all in one. Shoot me now. I did at one point try to give her a dose of her own medicine by loudly eating kettle chips.. the really crunchy kind... it didnt work.. but the other person in the room was cringing. Decided not to torture the good coworker anymore.

    The loud "GOOD MORNING" perky type who puts her nose in everyones business and causes problems by gossiping and needing to know *everything*... i wish your contract was up a year sooner.
  • supatim
    supatim Posts: 239 Member
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    My cube neighbor always leaves his phone on his desk - and his ringtone is Billie Jean. FML!!!! It sticks that song in my head all day!!!! THERE IT GOES AGAIN!!!!
  • NNAhuja
    NNAhuja Posts: 669 Member
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    Public nail clipper guy....none of us wants to hear you clipping your nails, go to the bathroom or better yet...do it at home!
    ^^^^THIS^^^^
  • creech6317
    creech6317 Posts: 869 Member
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    We have a guy who belches. I'm not talking a little burp here. I am talking full on belches that would make Barney on the Simpsons proud. I work in a winery, we have forklifts driving through our shop and 13 guys talking and using tools, machinery going, but you can hear the belches over all of that.
  • ittybittypixie
    ittybittypixie Posts: 25
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    yuck, nail clippers!
  • ShakeyMD
    ShakeyMD Posts: 59 Member
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    Love it! These are all cracking me up!
  • _Timmeh_
    _Timmeh_ Posts: 2,096 Member
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    Office lady who feeds her horses before coming to work, then walks in with half a road apple stuck to the bottom of her boots and stinky wet hay on her shoulders.
  • threnners
    threnners Posts: 175 Member
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    The a**hole who burned the popcorn in the break room so the smell can waft all over the entire.frigging.floor.

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