Curly hair isn't sexy?

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  • crisanderson27
    crisanderson27 Posts: 5,343 Member
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    My hair is extremely curly. I guess this was cute when I was young but now I keep it short to hide the curls.

    ^^^^^^^^

    This is about the longest I let my hair get now...and you can see the curls coming in already:

    7434194_9508.jpg
  • soonskinny7
    soonskinny7 Posts: 18
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    I have curly hair too (long, dark brown, loose-spiral), and I get compliments all the time from people who say they'd kill for my hair. However, 98% of these compliments come from girls. I rarely have guys comment on or compliment me for my hair. I think women see it as sexier than men do, probably because all kinds of wild-curly/wavy/kinky hair types are popularized by the world of high fashion. I can't count how many ads I've seen in Vogue/Harper's Bazaar/ Cosmopolitan that have featured glossy, sexy, perfect, pin-up style models with said hair types. I should mention that I never see ads featuring these models in men's magazines. We are being sold different ideals of gender perfection.
  • Restlessme
    Restlessme Posts: 191 Member
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    I do have curly hair and I absolutely would LOVE it if I knew how to do it.
    Your curls are absolutely gorgeous and honestly, if I could do my hair like that, I'd wear it down every day.

    Straightening hair just tends to be damaging and I'm tired of damaging my hair.

    Thanks hun. Look, if you need any advice/tips, feel free to ask. I used to be so upset over my damaged, dry, frizzy hair, looking at childhood photos and lamenting that my curls would never look the same again.

    Now, it's easy for me. No special styling products, no leave ins. I just look after it well, and it does the work for me.

    Don't hesitate if you need any help.

    And, YES, the straightener is damaging, look what it done to my hair :sad:

    So. No flat ironing for me. At least until 2013. I can do banding if I want a straighter look.

    I'm hoping you don't mind if I message you then! :)
    I'm definitely trying to maintain a no flatironing until a certain date as well. Plus, you don't leave anything in your hair? I plop everything in mine.
  • Redtango76
    Redtango76 Posts: 144
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    I have curly hair that looks very much like yours...most of the comments I receive regarding my hair are positive. " is that natural ? Your so lucky! " or i love your hair it's super cute! I haven't had many people tell me it looks better straight. But for some reason I was compelled to straighten it for a while. I have since given up on straightening and only wear it curly. I think part of the issue may be that for sometime straight hair has been the popular way to style it. But I can remember the 80's and 90's when every woman on the planet was getting spiral perms and teasing their hair to the maximum volume ! And lucky me didn't have to even try it just came natural ...yup us curly girls rocked the 80's and 90's .
  • enchanted_daydream
    enchanted_daydream Posts: 258 Member
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    I have naturally curly hair which I have learned to love even though all my childhood I wanted straight hair! The only thing I still hate is when it gets frizzy. Now I only occasionally straighten it went I want it to be more manageable because it has gotten pretty long and is really thick, but the compliments I get when I have it natural far outweigh when it is straight. And I definitely find wavy/curly hair gorgeous on other women! Your curls are beautiful!
  • V3ggieL0vinGinger
    V3ggieL0vinGinger Posts: 235
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    I have a head of super curly, bouncy red hair. I'm slowly learning to love it. I used to straighten the hell out of my poor hair every single day and then it started to become all unhealthy and broken. I stopped straightening and now it's healthy again. I'm constantly told that my hair is gorgeous whenever I wear it curly. I don't know who you've been talking to, but curly hair is the bomb! :) Love your locks!
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    I say us curlies have the best of both worlds! I have a mop of unruly, bouncy, blond curls all over my head. But I love them! They are fun, and wild, and sexy as hell. And, when I want to look serious and seductive, I can straighten it and take in all those compliments and stares! It's much easier to go from super curly to straight than the other way around! Embrace your curls....we make a lot of women jealous by having them! ;)

    But that's exactly the stereotype I am challenging. Why can't we be/look serious and seductive with curls?

    Think of what stereotypes you can think of curly haired girls - Grace in Will and Grace, Lucy in I Love Lucy, etc. They are the funny, cute girls.


    Yeah, they're funny, but they are never the romantic characters. Curly hair is used as a limiting shorthand for a personality type.

    And think about all the more recent movies about ugly duckling girls who are made over into swans. The young woman often starts with dark, frizzy hair and ends up with straight hair. She's often presented as uncouth and awkward until she gets her hair straightened and steps into 3" high heels (don't get me started on high heels.) The message is clear: If you want to be hot and sophisticated your curly hair has to go.

    And Grace and Lucy have wavy, curly hair -- a far cry from the kind of African American kinky curly hair about which the OP wrote. HUGE difference.
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    It wasn't that she conveyed that message I think. We basically sat down and she said that now that I was going into high school she was going to stop doing my hair for me each day. I tried to do it myself for a week and failed miserably--and I was very upset because in my mind the only way I could manage it was by cutting it short. She then told me that there was something called a relaxer that would make it easier for me to manage with long (past my shoulder) length hair. She also told me I could consider getting braids or dreads or any of the other things that people with natural hair have. After looking at all the options--I decided that I wanted a relaxer because it would give me the freedom to do what I wanted with my hair while keeping it at the length I wanted and the style I wanted. She never pressured me into it--she gave me alternatives that I could look into, I told her what were my priorities--keeping my hair long and being able to do it myself and have it look the way I wanted it to-- and suggested that for those priorities, I might consider a relaxer. She was actually hoping that I'd want braids.


    I wasn't saying that you were pressured into it. But the idea that your hair must be controlled in some way either by braids or chemicals is a negative one. Thank goodness a lot of women are now exploring other methods.
  • AndiJoy812
    AndiJoy812 Posts: 236
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    I say us curlies have the best of both worlds! I have a mop of unruly, bouncy, blond curls all over my head. But I love them! They are fun, and wild, and sexy as hell. And, when I want to look serious and seductive, I can straighten it and take in all those compliments and stares! It's much easier to go from super curly to straight than the other way around! Embrace your curls....we make a lot of women jealous by having them! ;)

    But that's exactly the stereotype I am challenging. Why can't we be/look serious and seductive with curls?

    Think of what stereotypes you can think of curly haired girls - Grace in Will and Grace, Lucy in I Love Lucy, etc. They are the funny, cute girls.


    Yeah, they're funny, but they are never the romantic characters. Curly hair is used as a limiting shorthand for a personality type.

    And think about all the more recent movies about ugly duckling girls who are made over into swans. The young woman often starts with dark, frizzy hair and ends up with straight hair. She's often presented as uncouth and awkward until she gets her hair straightened and steps into 3" high heels (don't get me started on high heels.) The message is clear: If you want to be hot and sophisticated your curly hair has to go.

    And Grace and Lucy have wavy, curly hair -- a far cry from the kind of African American kinky curly hair about which the OP wrote. HUGE difference.


    First curly girl heroine in the recent media - the new Disney Princess, Merida. She has this wild, uncontrollable red hair - the only time it was "tamed" in the movie was when her mother was trying to force her to act like someone she wasn't. I know that Disney has been the worst offender of teaching young girls that you need a man to rescue you - but I think they got the story right, for once. Merida is a smart, independent, strong-willed and capable young woman - Disney finally got the story right.
    And as the mother of a curly girl who is 4 and is all about everything pink and princesses, I loved it.
  • treetpflyer
    treetpflyer Posts: 184 Member
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    I love curly hair on a lady. I think it is different and I find it very sexy! ;)
  • Redtango76
    Redtango76 Posts: 144
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    I say us curlies have the best of both worlds! I have a mop of unruly, bouncy, blond curls all over my head. But I love them! They are fun, and wild, and sexy as hell. And, when I want to look serious and seductive, I can straighten it and take in all those compliments and stares! It's much easier to go from super curly to straight than the other way around! Embrace your curls....we make a lot of women jealous by having them! ;)

    But that's exactly the stereotype I am challenging. Why can't we be/look serious and seductive with curls?


    This has to do more with the style of the times anybody remember Pretty Woman the emphasis on her beauty was her long red curly hair.

    Think of what stereotypes you can think of curly haired girls - Grace in Will and Grace, Lucy in I Love Lucy, etc. They are the funny, cute girls.


    Yeah, they're funny, but they are never the romantic characters. Curly hair is used as a limiting shorthand for a personality type.

    And think about all the more recent movies about ugly duckling girls who are made over into swans. The young woman often starts with dark, frizzy hair and ends up with straight hair. She's often presented as uncouth and awkward until she gets her hair straightened and steps into 3" high heels (don't get me started on high heels.) The message is clear: If you want to be hot and sophisticated your curly hair has to go.

    And Grace and Lucy have wavy, curly hair -- a far cry from the kind of African American kinky curly hair about which the OP wrote. HUGE difference.
  • Redtango76
    Redtango76 Posts: 144
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    Oops that didn't work ....what I was trying to say was ....that current movies transform women to the current style ...if you look back there are many movies that portray women with curly hair as sexy ....any body remember Pretty Woman the emphasis on her beauty was placed on her long curly red hair!
  • RobynMWilson
    RobynMWilson Posts: 1,540 Member
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    I fought my curly hair all thru my 30s up till the last year. i ripped my hair out and it got shorter and shorter from the breakage till I finally looked back at some pics and thought I looked better with curly hair. Whenever I do my hair curly, I get nothing but compliments and how beautiful my hair is. And now it's growing like a week and my curl is back to "normal" after years of destroying my hair with the flat iron. And I've never had anyone not call me sexy when I wear it curly. So I'm back to being "me" after seeing the grass really isn't greener on the "other" side...esp b/c when I wore my hair straight for years I missed the body it had when it was curly. I forgot I AM curly! lol
  • RobynMWilson
    RobynMWilson Posts: 1,540 Member
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    I have a head of super curly, bouncy red hair. I'm slowly learning to love it. I used to straighten the hell out of my poor hair every single day and then it started to become all unhealthy and broken. I stopped straightening and now it's healthy again. I'm constantly told that my hair is gorgeous whenever I wear it curly. I don't know who you've been talking to, but curly hair is the bomb! :) Love your locks!

    Exactly! God knew what he was doing when he made us...took me a long time to see curly fits my carefree independent spirit and looks better on me lol
  • tea_addicted_
    tea_addicted_ Posts: 17
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    I just curled my hair (: I love my hair curly!! Normally, its kind of fluffy, puffy, and wavy haha
  • DizzyLinds
    DizzyLinds Posts: 856 Member
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    I lose my mojo if my hair isn't curly!
  • Redtango76
    Redtango76 Posts: 144
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    Oops that didn't work ....what I was trying to say was ....that current movies transform women to the current style ...if you look back there are many movies that portray women with curly hair as sexy ....any body remember Pretty Woman the emphasis on her beauty was placed on her long curly red hair!
  • vacherin
    vacherin Posts: 192
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    "No one desires" curly hair? Mine looks very similar to yours, and EVERYONE comments on it wherever I go. Men have always found it sexy (until they find out what a bizarre personality I have - then they run). I think you must be living in the wrong town. Come to West London and you'll be fighting them off with a stick!
  • Josie_lifting_cats
    Josie_lifting_cats Posts: 949 Member
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    The grass is always greener. My hair is closer to straight than curly. But for my boudoir photos.......

    Joslyn006.jpg

    My husband was THRILLED that I curled my hair. He loves it when I curl it.

    Sometimes I think men like the whole "different side" we seem to have when we do the opposite of "normal" with our hair. That's all.
  • kytte
    kytte Posts: 323 Member
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    i think you should be yourself, and be happy with who you are. it's nice if someone compliments you with straight hair, but that doesn't mean you should want to satisfy them all the time. and sure, maybe you get more attention from men that way but let's be honest a woman doesn't really need attention from more than one man, and if you are only yourself and the way you were meant to be, then soon enough you will find the man who is right for you.

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