Curly hair isn't sexy?

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  • azalais7
    azalais7 Posts: 187 Member
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    Thanks everyone, for the replies.

    I think a lot of it is to do with people not knowing how to take care of curly hair. Or having damaged curly hair that, of course, is going to look dry, frizzy, messy etc.

    And also, I always wonder, why do so many people with curly hair keep it short or in unflattering styles/cuts?

    ^^This. Finding a stylist who really knows how to cut curly hair is key. Mine is worth her weight in gold. I resisted my curls until I was in my late 20s, and finally did get it cut well. And men often tell me how much they like it. :smile:
  • kater8er
    kater8er Posts: 364 Member
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    Question...when you say curly hair, are you limiting that to un-relaxed curly hair?
  • gauchogirl
    gauchogirl Posts: 467 Member
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    I've NEVER heard curly hair wasn't sexy, only that it IS. All types are attractive to someone, everyone is different. I'm thinking you need not worry about what "everyone else" says and just do what feels best to YOU. I'm sure you've heard the saying "what other people think about you is none of your business". Remember that and just be yourself!
  • angiezturn
    angiezturn Posts: 49
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    I think a large percentage of European decent have straight hair, therefore the style is always for the "masses". Most cannot achieve curls even with a perm it will only last a month. I have naturally curly hair and my husband loves it. I straighten it, he hates it. There is nothing more sexy than thick curls edging around accentuating a beautiful face. Curls have been considered beautiful for centuries for a reason. They ooze sex appeal
  • Laces_0ut
    Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
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    as a guy i think straight hair is sexier than curly hair.
  • LeggyKettleBabe
    LeggyKettleBabe Posts: 300 Member
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    only if its pubic hair.

    I think curly hair is very pretty otherwsise.
  • christina0089
    christina0089 Posts: 709 Member
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    I say us curlies have the best of both worlds! I have a mop of unruly, bouncy, blond curls all over my head. But I love them! They are fun, and wild, and sexy as hell. And, when I want to look serious and seductive, I can straighten it and take in all those compliments and stares! It's much easier to go from super curly to straight than the other way around! Embrace your curls....we make a lot of women jealous by having them! ;)

    There you have it in a nut shell!!

    I love my curls! I went thru the phase where I did not as I think most curlies do but I have def found them to be both fun and sexy!
  • scrmngdsy
    scrmngdsy Posts: 54 Member
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    Let me just let my art history nerd out for a minute:

    Renaissance depictions of curly haired women were literally ment to be read as the personification of 'virility' aka being sexually 'ripe'

    So, that gives us a pretty good idea of how sexy curls really are! :D:D:D
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    ...but I also get the messages of 'curly hair is more work/curly hair must be completely perfect to look presentable/curly hair isn't sexy/curly hair is negative'.


    You're not imagining that, although, as I said, things are slowly changing. It's a combination of more people wearing their hair like this (especially professionals)), more information and education (which did not exist when I was young: you either got your hair hot combed or relaxed, that was it), and good products.

    Many black men shave their heads. That's their way of avoiding or dealing with the issue of their hair.

    I've had natural, kinky-curly hair for a few years now. Generally, it's worth it. People frequently tell me I have beautiful hair. But I'm not going to tell you there aren't times when I wish it didn't shrink so much or that the curls weren't looser. About the texture, I really can't tell you whether it's a genuine aesthetic preference on my part or cultural brainwashing.

    At times I have to be in conservative, corporate settings. If I'm insecure about how my hair looks, I pull it back in a ponytail, but fan out the curls.

    I consider my curls to be a very small example of Gandhi's "Be the change you want to see in the world." I don't want another generation of kids with gorgeous curly to kinky hair growing up thinking there's something wrong with it.
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    I think a large percentage of European decent have straight hair, therefore the style is always for the "masses". Most cannot achieve curls even with a perm it will only last a month. I have naturally curly hair and my husband loves it. I straighten it, he hates it. There is nothing more sexy than thick curls edging around accentuating a beautiful face. Curls have been considered beautiful for centuries for a reason. They ooze sex appeal

    I've been told by hair stylists that most people (excluding perhaps Asians) have some curl or wave in their hair. Completely straight hair is very rare.
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    I also have naturally curly hair, and I've been told that when I use the straight iron on it that I look younger and thinner. I was made with curly hair that is totally unruly most of the time.

    Interesting. ON many people after a certain age curly hair is more flattering and forgiving. Straight hair shows every gray hair and it puts more focus on the face.
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    Sexy is in the eye of the beholder. And we usually think that what we have isn't.
    People with curly hair straighten it out. People with straight hair get perms.

    It's much more complicated than that, especially if you're talking about a black person with "typical" kinky/curly hair.
  • InnerFatGirl
    InnerFatGirl Posts: 2,687 Member
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    my GF has natural, very curly hair...and yes I do prefer it. Love it !!
    Natural, curly hair is the best. I personally love the way it looks and feels. Getting my girl to believe that is a challenge though LOL

    :bigsmile: :bigsmile:

    I'm not going to lie, though. It bugs me when women/men won't accept their curls.
  • InnerFatGirl
    InnerFatGirl Posts: 2,687 Member
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    Love your curls...I would die to have them....they are sexy and beautiful!!! I like my hair better when its curled....I have a small wave to it...but would love to have a full set of natural curls :)

    Thank you!
  • InnerFatGirl
    InnerFatGirl Posts: 2,687 Member
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    I find the same... however... we do have the best of both worlds as there are plenty of products and straigteners to help straighten hair but to curl them and get the curls to stay not so many...

    However... i straighten my hair when im trying to look glam... even for a running event... i also think it makes my face look thinner when its straight!

    Hmm, I used to think this, but as I've not yet found a fool-proof method of straightening my hair without heat, I'm inclined to disagree. However, I do think my hair is versitile in terms of changing appearance.
  • InnerFatGirl
    InnerFatGirl Posts: 2,687 Member
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    What does the appearance of your hair have to do with staying in shape and losing weight?

    The same relevance that chit chat, fun, and games has to do with staying in shape and losing weight :wink:
  • InnerFatGirl
    InnerFatGirl Posts: 2,687 Member
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    Curly hair is sexy.

    No you should not straighten yours! Your hair is a gift from what I can see on your pictures so don't give it up if it's something you love.

    Being yourself is what is sexy, I love little Japanese girls with bobs and fringes (short cut and bangs) because their hair is so straight - my children would look stupid like that (if I had any) but those children look gorgeous because it's natural.

    I meet a lot of curlies who straighten their hair but general consensus is people like curly hair. I have never heard people say they think straight hair is sexier.

    BUT I have long blonde hair so when I straighten it I look like a stereotype and it attracts no end of trouble.

    Thank you!

    I also agree that what's natural looks better, if it's healthy. I love natural. I don't really like anything else but natural.
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    i know exactly what you mean. i'm a pretty vocal, soap-box type of feminist, and i'm not totally in the mood to jump on my soapbox right now. i just came to show some solidarity. i believe in the white-washing of the beauty ideal. even though our concept of the beauty ideal is constantly shifting -- and that's the point of a society having one in the first place, to make it more difficult to obtain -- the ideal always focuses on typically anglo-saxon features. it's not a healthy or constructive concept, and it gets even more dangerous when you think about how the beauty ideal affects women of color.

    Let's sell some soap together. :smile:
  • InnerFatGirl
    InnerFatGirl Posts: 2,687 Member
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    This has been on my mind for a while now, and I just wanted to express myself, and perhaps get some other people's opinions/thoughts on the matter.

    All my life, whenever I straighten my hair, I get told it looks better. Or I should do it more often. When I look to the media, there's negative curly stereotypes everywhere, and curly hair is often representated only by wavy hair or artificially curled hair. We get told that our hair is hard work, or hear other curlies tell everyone curly hair is a nightmare. I constantly hear other curlies say they straighten their hair daily, and that they hate their curly hair.

    I feel I am treated better when my hair is straightened, found to be more attractive. Taken more seriously. I am attracted to white men, and I get more looks from them when my hair is straight.

    I am told my curly hair makes me look 'fun', cute, open. I am not told it makes me look sexy or seductive.

    When I have seen men asked which they prefer, an overwhelming majority say they prefer straight hair, or loose curls.

    I love my curls, but I am starting to feel insecure about them. Me, of all people. I sometimes crave straight hair, and I don't know why. I refuse to use any heat on my hair anymore, because the heat damaged a few curls and left them looser, even though I take very good care of my hair and flat iron to a minimum.

    I do love curly hair, and I love mine. I have loads of pictures saved on my laptop of gorgeous ladies with big or long healthy curls. I feel they look sexy, and I certainly feel sexy when I have a good hair day.

    But all this time, in the back of my mind, there is just this little voice reminding me that, while some people may think curly hair is nice, not many people think it's sexy. Many think it's unprofessional, or wild, or 'cute', or just plain not as attractive as straight hair. It's never going to be the ideal. It's always going to be looked down on. No-one desires it.

    I'm not going to lie, it kind of burns. Why is it like this? Why can't all hair types, as long as they're healthy, be regarded as sexy?

    I personally think any long, healthy hair is sexy. The emphasis is on health, for me, not curl, or lack thereof (though, I do have a special place in my heart for long frizz-free type 2c-3c hair).

    Thoughts?

    Any fellow curlies, how do you feel about this?

    It's hard not to be influenced by societal attitudes, and for the last few decades, there's been a marked preference for straight hair. Beauty observers and people who study culture have also said that there's an aspect of racism in the favoring of straight hair, especially straight, blond hair -- it's the opposite end of the spectrum of brown, "Negroid" hair. Curly hair, it's said, is criticized, because of its association with black people. That why the way curly hair often is described smacks of stereotypes associated with black people: It's supposedly too natural, uncontrolled, unprofessional, and actually, some people think it's too sexual.

    Fortunately, some women are trying to change attitudes and to find hairstyles that show off their curly hair to advantage. They're trying to develop styles that don't require damaging their hair and don't take hours to put together, and the upkeep of which don't require them to refrain from exercise.

    Most of us want to be attractive, and there are strong conscious and unconscious pressures to conform, but sometimes you have to take a stand. I reocmmend the naturallycurly.com website and the Curly Girl Handbook.

    I agree. And there are a lot of social stereotypes/ideals that get to me. I am a strong minded person, but I am also just that - a person. A human being. I get affected by social pressures like everybody else does. For example, I spent years being friends with a girl who told me my lips were too big, constantly. As a consequence? I'm still insecure about my lip size. I have people tell me I'm black and that I don't look biracial at all. As a consequence? Personal identity issues. Some people may think our issues with ourselves are 'silly', but that's easy to say when it's not you with the issue.

    I know about the NC.com and the CG handbook :) I heard about them when I first went natural. But the CG method doesn't appeal to me. I use the LHC forum, and I have pretty much mastered my haircare alone :)
  • InnerFatGirl
    InnerFatGirl Posts: 2,687 Member
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    As a child I hated my hair, and often wished for straight hair but during the span of the last 10 years or so I've truly learned to LOVE my hair. I have waist length spiral curls and I never straighten it, my curls are who I am. I think curly hair adds a bit of sass to one's personality just my opinion though..

    Wahoo! I'm growing my hair to hip length! Love seeing long curly hair.

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