Dismayed overhearing comments............

ninerbuff

oh my ****
I am incredibly disappointed with the majority of people who have commented on this post (NOT ALL!!)
THIS IS A WEBSITE FOR PEOPLE WHO WANT TO CHANGE FOR THE BETTER, AND LOSE WEIGHT AND BE HEALTHY
THIS IS A PLACE WHERE PEOPLE COME FOR HELP, SUPPORT AND NOT TO BE JUDGED
AND HERE HALF OF YOU ARE, STANDING AROUND ON CRUISES, PROBABLY IN MALLS AND MOVIE THEATERS,
JUDGING HEAVY PEOPLE FOR SAYING THEY ARE TAKING A WEEK OFF THEIR DIET BECAUSE THEY ARE ON VACATION
THEY ARE ALLOWED!
YOU DONT KNOW THAT THEY ARNT ON A DIET BACK HOME, AND THAT THEY HAVNT LOST 100 POUNDS
I AM HEAVY, I HAVE LOST 21 POUNDS, I STILL HAVE A CHEAT DAY AND SAY "I AM GOING TO ENJOY THIS BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN DOING SO GOOD"
SO STOP FREAKIN JUDGING PEOPLE AND GROW UP
YOU DONT KNOW THAT THEY ARNT TRYING AND FOR YOU TO SIT HERE ON A WEBSITE LIKE THIS
AND BASH THOSE PEOPLE IS DISGUSTING.

People come here to lose weight and be healthy, and when people make negative comments about behaviors that will cause them to gain weight and become unhealthy, that is somehow evil and wrong? I am confused. That seems to be more supportive than "It's ok, go ahead and eat 6000 calories in a day, you've earned it" which is exactly the sort of attitude that caused most people to become overweight to begin with. If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem, and trying to dress it up as capslock-laden righteous indignation doesn't change anything. I wouldn't tell an alcoholic that it's ok to drink as much as they want because they are on vacation, regardless of how well they've done recently. I don't see how telling people with weight problems that it's ok to eat whatever they want is acceptable... just because you feel defense does not give you the right to sabotage others.

*claps*

And with regards to the OP, I also see you child aged around 10 in my neighbourhood who I would estimate around 200lb and the rest of the family are the same. Do I think it's a very sad thing to see, absolutely!! And I don't think it's judgemental to think it's sad that this child is subjected to a lifestyle that will probably give him diabetes by the time he's a teen and quite probably forshorten his life.

I volunteer for my daughters school on "walk" days (where there's an adult supervised 30 minute walk before school for the kids) and see these elementary kids who are 80lbs and their knees already "bowing" in to support the added weight and my heart drops because I KNOW that if it doesn't change now, that the changes of adult obesity is imminent. Overweight/obese adults usually start out as overweight/obese children as most on here know now.
These kids really want to play and bond with the others, but gas out after a few minutes of physical activity. To me there's nothing worse than watching a child unable to participate because of being overweight/obese because I know that it's totally fixable. It's just that I can't be the one to fix it for them.

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Exactly and whilst people are moaning and pointing fingers at you - the fact kids are that big IS the fault of the parents. A five year old doesn't drive himself off to McDonalds does he? Not since last time I checked. There needs to be more parental responsibility about being healthy - losing weight is something you should do of your own volition as an adult, not something a health professional needs to advise for your child!

It does suck. Like anything else, it starts at home and habits are hard to break if there's no intervention.

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yo_andi

My 2 cents. As a smoker for a long time trying to quit, you should hear the Smack that people talk, RIGHT TO MY FACE. Total strangers. Telling me that I am killing myself and lilling the people around me.
This is OK, but God forbid you tell a morbidly obese person that they need to buy two seats on a plane, or something like that. Then we are insensitive BULLIES.

Big time double standard there.

And yes, I was fat and lost weight. And even when I was fat, I would look at FATTER people than me, and in my own head, or to my wife, I would judge them. Damn right. Just like I was/am judged on my smoking.

As a former smoker, I absolutely agree, on all accounts! And I'm still fat. And I judge. We all do it. Some of us are just more honest about it than others.

ninerbuff

The average cruiser will put on 1lb a day.

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That kind of blows my mind. Wow. A pound a day is a lot.

It's really all about moderation. And eating only when you're hungry. I mean, I ate all kinds of delicious French butter and cheese - and I drank a whole lot of wine - but I never ate just because "it's mealtime." We only ate when we were hungry which, in France, involved a lot of grazing while walking. Plus, the portions are about 1/3 size of American portions and everything is made from scratch. Maybe that's why it came off so easy.

The French have it right. A friend of mine (who is quite overweight) complained at the cost of food there. I asked him how expensive it was and he didn't talk expense, he kept showing me the portion size (about a 6-9 inch plate serving) with his hands and complaining that for the amount he paid, he got so little food. The average US plate is 13 inches. Some are 15 inches. Crazy huh?

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DaveRCF

Never been on a cruise and not planning on going on one either. Much prefer active vacations where you can eat tons of great food but because you're active you come back from your holiday the same weight and energized, not depressed.

All-inclusives appeal to the glutton in us all. Hence I avoid. Kind of like if you don't want to be tempted by the cookies in the cupboard make sure the cookies don't find their way into the cupboard in the first place.

PRMinx

The average cruiser will put on 1lb a day.

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That kind of blows my mind. Wow. A pound a day is a lot.

It's really all about moderation. And eating only when you're hungry. I mean, I ate all kinds of delicious French butter and cheese - and I drank a whole lot of wine - but I never ate just because "it's mealtime." We only ate when we were hungry which, in France, involved a lot of grazing while walking. Plus, the portions are about 1/3 size of American portions and everything is made from scratch. Maybe that's why it came off so easy.

The French have it right. A friend of mine (who is quite overweight) complained at the cost of food there. I asked him how expensive it was and he didn't talk expense, he kept showing me the portion size (about a 6-9 inch plate serving) with his hands and complaining that for the amount he paid, he got so little food. The average US plate is 13 inches. Some are 15 inches. Crazy huh?

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Totally. The French definitely have it right. If the food wasn't such a novelty for me and I didn't have the urge to try everything, I probably wouldn't have gained anything despite how rich it is (because I would have eaten less of it!) As you say, the portions are way smaller. And they don't fry a whole lot. But, they also take their time eating, which makes it easier to judge how hungry or full you really are.

DaveRCF

this comment made me smile...the original post to this thread is so judgemental and elitist. I'd rather be friends with a one obese person than have 100 fitness trainer friends "caring" about me....mind your own business.

Ouch. So I guess I shouldn't send an "add friend" request?

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Keep posting this stuff ninerbuff. Your comments and advice are consistently among the best on MFP.
Methinks you hit a nerve!

ninerbuff

Never been on a cruise and not planning on going on one either. Much prefer active vacations where you can eat tons of great food but because you're active you come back from your holiday the same weight and energized, not depressed.

All-inclusives appeal to the glutton in us all. Hence I avoid. Kind of like if you don't want to be tempted by the cookies in the cupboard make sure the cookies don't find their way into the cupboard in the first place.

There were activities on the ship that were physical (basketball competitions, sports simulators, scavenger hunts based on time, dancing and physically active excursions when we ported), but not many of the overweight/obese were participants.

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Martucha123

The average cruiser will put on 1lb a day.

A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
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That kind of blows my mind. Wow. A pound a day is a lot.

It's really all about moderation. And eating only when you're hungry. I mean, I ate all kinds of delicious French butter and cheese - and I drank a whole lot of wine - but I never ate just because "it's mealtime." We only ate when we were hungry which, in France, involved a lot of grazing while walking. Plus, the portions are about 1/3 size of American portions and everything is made from scratch. Maybe that's why it came off so easy.

The French have it right. A friend of mine (who is quite overweight) complained at the cost of food there. I asked him how expensive it was and he didn't talk expense, he kept showing me the portion size (about a 6-9 inch plate serving) with his hands and complaining that for the amount he paid, he got so little food. The average US plate is 13 inches. Some are 15 inches. Crazy huh?

A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

Totally. The French definitely have it right. If the food wasn't such a novelty for me and I didn't have the urge to try everything, I probably wouldn't have gained anything despite how rich it is (because I would have eaten less of it!) As you say, the portions are way smaller. And they don't fry a whole lot. But, they also take their time eating, which makes it easier to judge how hungry or full you really are.

I live in Spain and my plates are 6.3 inch only! poor me :P

bcattoes

I went on a cruise once to the Caribbean and I was disgusted the way people went on with food.... 4 meals a day some of which were8 courses, chocolate buffets, high tea, cooked breakfast, cold breakfast, brunch... You name it they were shovelling it down their throats.

This was my experience as well on the one and only cruise I went on . And most of the food wasn't even very good. The restaurant that only served dinner was pretty good, but most of the buffets they set up throughout the day tasted like fast food. But everyone lined up like they were serving manna from heaven. With the food quality and long lines, I had no trouble not overeating.

deannarey13

I find it interesting that a fitness professional who found himself in a position to need to lose weight is so judgmental of others. You don't know any of those people, or any of their situations.

And if I'm not married to (or partnered with) them or parenting them, it's none of my damned business what anyone else is eating.

Exactly. That is the first thing that I thought. I've never been obese and I've been on a number of cruises. I'm sure this was going on around me everywhere. However, why be so judgemental!? Just enjoy your vacation and mind your own business and make your own food choices.

deannarey13

I usually don't comment on things but this really bothers me. I have had to deal with people like this my entire life. I am overweight. I am overweight because of several reasons...mainly I overeat and don't exercise enough. I am trying to make a change. The last thing I need is some judgemental person making negative comments like this. What I choose to eat or not eat is my business...and only mine....please keep your insulting judgements to yourself...

Very well said! Like I had said in a previous statement, I've never been obese/overweight but a few of my dearest friends are. I can only imagine how hard that is and I don't pretend to understand how they feel. The very LAST thing that is needed is judgement from strangers.

paleirishmother

Wow. It's creepy, you're on a cruise looking around, estimating the weight of children. Yikes! Get over yourself!

myofibril

If more people spent time over indulging in free physical activity rather than free food there would be a lot less people with weight issues.

Why does eating so much that you feel physically uncomfortable or ill equate to having "a good time"? That's over indulging not really because you like the taste of the food but for its own sake. Sure it's cool to relax your restrictions a bit but I think many people eat excessively on holiday just for something to do rather than real pleasure.

herstrawberri

people should strive for a more reasonable weight limit so that we can enjoy life more.

Don’t you think that we know that? I am “OBVIOUSLY” one of those “obese” (formerly morbidly obese) “and very overweight” people that enjoyed my dinner on my 2 week cruise in June. I was careful what I ate for breakfast and most of my lunches (some were on shore excursions that included local meals) but I fully enjoyed my dinners and ate what I thought was the most interesting (a lot of fish and seafood, however with rich sauces) as well as deserts.

Personally, I’m only concerned about my own weight and health problems as well as those of my wife, not that of others, because I don’t know their mindset or circumstances.

By the way, I gained one pound on my cruise.

I agree with this post. I think this whole thread is just an opportunity for people to talk about how grossed out they are about people around them and I don't like those intentions. Who cares about these comments people made in line to enjoy their cruise food? Maybe they really were on diets. Or maybe not. How do we know? Did you ask? So why make this post? So other people could chime in about other obese people they've seen daring to eat in public? I've never been on a cruise. One day I'll be able to afford one and then I'm eating whatever I want.

BOTH of these!!! I used to weigh 375, I now weigh 237 and if I was on that cruise, believe me, I would be eating whatever the hell I wanted. You are on vacation, why are you judging what others are eating? Did the cruise suck so bad that you needed to find something else to do? I get we all need to have personal accountability, but that is up to them...not you. Sitting in judgement over ANYONE over ANYTHING is wrong. Plan and simple.

runnerchick69

So just a couple of things I noticed on my cruise was when we were eating, there were OBVIOUSLY quite a few people on there that were obese and very overweight, so while waiting in line, I heard more than a few times some of them saying "hands aren't tied on this cruise" or "diet is out the door". Of course my first thought was that based on their physical appearance, it doesn't seem that they had any reason to make the statement. Now that's ASSUMING they weren't dieting prior to the cruise, but in reality, they aren't the size they are because of eating normally (in general cases). And let me tell you that there were so many people eating like they were starving when their bodies didn't show that was the case.
I believe you're there to enjoy a vacation, but there has to be a limit to how much you eat, just like in everyday life. I felt bad for one child who was only 12 (I estimated him to be about 185lb) and wanted to ride the Aquaduck ride with his dad (well over 350lbs), but together they were over the weight limit that was safe for 2 people to ride. So each had to go individually.
More the reason that we as people should strive for a more reasonable weight limit so that we can enjoy life more.

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It is hard for me sometimes to listen to people say things like that when we are on vacation. I do believe you should enjoy your vacation and when we were in Cancun last year I did just that. I ate things I might not normally eat and I tried some new things but I also ate tons of fruit and veggies because they were so damn good

When I see people who are obviously not healthy and I hear them making remarks like that I have a hard time not saying something. I'm not doing it to offend anyone but it is because I've been there, I get it and I also know they are not as happy as they could be if they had their weight and health under control. It's such a fine line between what is ok to say and what isn't but as obesity levels continue to climb I wonder if maybe it isn't time to stop worrying about being politically correct or hurting someones feelings and start calling people out. I know for me I wish someone would have just said hey Chris you're fat and you need to do something about it but they danced around it as I continued to get bigger.

alcon79

And I judge. We all do it. Some of us are just more honest about it than others.

THIS! These topics always bring out the how dare you judge crowd, probably because obesity is a sensitive topic. Everybody judges everybody - it's what you do in first impressions. You observe someone and make a decision on them. People need to stop pretending that it doesn't happen.

ninerbuff

I find it interesting that a fitness professional who found himself in a position to need to lose weight is so judgmental of others. You don't know any of those people, or any of their situations.

And if I'm not married to (or partnered with) them or parenting them, it's none of my damned business what anyone else is eating.

Exactly. That is the first thing that I thought. I've never been obese and I've been on a number of cruises. I'm sure this was going on around me everywhere. However, why be so judgemental!? Just enjoy your vacation and mind your own business and make your own food choices.

Because I'm an observant person and it was something I observed. I didn't go up to my stateroom and start making calculations, looking up statistics, etc. I've opined on what I saw. It's okay if you disagree.

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Nansweetnan

No, you missed the metaphor...I would be your friend, IF you were truly supportive. Being supportive means someone you care about has either asked you for your support or you care about them so much that you are unconditionally supportive. When you make "observations" and then report them,well, I feel this is more in the gossip category than supportive category. Overweight people know they are overweight, your observations don't help, they just reinforce the negative and come off sounding mean and judgemental even if you had the best intentions--your communication skills need work. Obesity is a complex condition caused by a multitude of factors, by just saying to someone put the fork down, well, that doesn't work. If I was a fitness trainer, and someone came to me looking for help, I certainly wouldn't use this oversimplification as a tool. Behavior modification is learned not dictated. And btw, I am not an obese person defending my "meat", as used in a earlier post--to compare people's complex behavior to a dogs conditioned behavior is just ridiculous. I think the answer is in the word "love". ELE...look it up on you tube.

ninerbuff

Wow. It's creepy, you're on a cruise looking around, estimating the weight of children. Yikes! Get over yourself!

Lol, you're making an exaggeration. I estimated one childs weight because he was denied riding with his father because of weight safety limits. Yikes somehow that's totally creepy.........

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Barbellsandthimbles

I went on my first cruise this past May with my mother. I had every intention of eating Gluten free (for health reasons) and as healthy as possible. I was also going to workout 5-6 days. Well, little did I know how much food would be shoved down your throat. Oh, and if you aren't at port or doing something else on the ship, people spend time eating and visiting. Food was EVERYWHERE. My diet quickly became derailed, even though I was mindful of what I ate. I was more disgusted with myself than other people. I didn't pay any attention to what others were eating because I was too focused on trying to make the best of my situation (and sometimes failing). I went to the gym several times but was only able to workout 3 days because the gym was packed. Yep...there were no more bikes, treadmills, ellipticals, and the free weights were tied up as well. However, I did get exercise in while at port (rock climbing) as well. All in all, it was a great trip and I gained a couple of pounds, but never once did I look at someone else's plate in disgust.