serious problem

going2befit4ever

to stop the arguments we gave the kids (6) $8/week to buy their cereal they were cereal killers and would do the same the 1st week they did the same with the expensive "bad" and then had to eat toast or steel cut oats till the following wednesday the extra money was for their junk food amazingly they began to buy cheaper cereal, the ones which when I bought them were greeted with complaint and the middle son has a side business of selling his cereal to the highest bidder, and for me peace

dinosnopro

I really don't know where else to go to get ideas or vent. I am on my cell phone so yeah, I'll be txt typing.

I have a VERY limited budget for food. As in @$75 per week for 5 people and 3 of those are growing boys.
I buy healthy lasting items (freezer bulk things) and try to get a few things like a bag or 2 of chips or popcorn for a snack to last a few days.

Today I went to the store and spent $35 on enough food for 4 days. I got 2 gallons of milk and cereal for them for the next 2 mornings. They have been told over and over and over DRINK WATER or koolaid.

Tonight I go in the kitchen to get my 8 oz milk with my protein mix....ALL the cereal is gone. There is no milk left. The chips are gone. I am almost completely out of food again! This happens every time I go to the store!
There is hamburger chicken potatoes green beans corn carrots and water left until Saturday.

When I make food they wont eat it. Then cry they are hungry. I am not a short order cook. This is not a restaurant. If I cook breakfast lunch dinner from now til Saturday the food wont last.

I thought of getting a locking cabinet but I shouldn't have to lock up food.
They are pigs. They are inconsiderate and thoughtless. This has gone on for MONTHS!
I have grounded, taken things, stopped buying treats, and yes I've busted their *kitten*. I don't care that they eat SOME but they eat ALL. Example ..I'll buy the 25 pk of popcorn for 2 weeks. Every last one is GONE within 2 DAYS. I've tried hiding food. Locking my bedroom door. Doesn't work. They ask to get something like batteries and go in, next thing ya know popcorn has 1 by 1 disappeared.
They aren't starving. They are healthy and active.
what would you do? I'm so tired of running out of food because they think they have to eat it all the day I buy it.

Is this Alec Baldwin? They are growing boys they need to eat. If they are old enough to cook stop buying the junk and buy more whole foods and make them cook it.

JuneBPrice

Teenage boys eat like you wouldn't believe. All I can say it, make all of their meals and say that if they don't eat that, then go hungry. That's my parents did with me.

tishad58

Don't buy the snack/treats/junk food. You'll save money and your kids will be healthier.

JosieRawr

how old are they?

kr3851

Growing up we didn't want for much - but we NEVER had mini bags of Doritos, popcorn, or other snacky foods like other kids. My mum made a batch of choc-chip cookies and that was our snack for the week. 4 kids and 24 cookies don't go very far - but we knew that once they were gone, we wouldn't get any more until the next Sunday. If we were hungry, we ate what was there or went without.

It's hard to deny your kids, but eventually they will learn that you have what you have, and if they are genuinely hungry, they will eat the apples or whatever you can afford for them to eat. Make them aware that what you buy for the week is FOR THE WEEK, and if they finish it all before the week is out, that's it, no more.

Make sure you fill the fruit bowl and show them how to prepare simple snacks to replace the easy-to-grab stuff. Toast, grilled cheese, veggie sticks. Get them involved in the shopping so that they can see how much things cost and can compare the cost of a bag of Doritos to the ingredients of a simple meal for 5. They shouldn't be worrying about whether or not you can afford to feed them, but they should be aware of how much more food you can buy if you stick to the staples and cook bigger batches of things that you all ENJOY eating.

subcult

Old fashioned pop corn should slow them down some too plus you can get a lot for little. If they have to pop it them selves and are forced to clean the mess it makes a big difference . I find I make it for myself way less often due to that fact.

Fasbold

Don't buy the junk food. Once it's gone, they have to eat what you fix. I remember being a teenage boy and eating everything in sight. By the end of the month I was eating lots of saltines & peanut butter. Active teenage boys are bottomless pits. If I buy junk food, like a bag of chips, my youngest eats it in one sitting. I know this, so I rarely buy junk food. Plus it is expensive and brings out his ADD. I took him off meds because I don't keep junk in the house.

If they don't eat what you fix, then save their plates and they get leftovers until it is gone. It is not child abuse to make sure there is food on the table. If you are worried about germs, then you fill their plates. Do you sit at the table? That also makes a world of difference.

You are the mom. Don't let them set the rules. It will drive you and them crazy.

ZoeyRobinson

I would say stop buying snacks and only bring in the food you are going to make meals with.

jennifer_a00

My kids eat TONS of bananas, carrots and celery with peanut butter, which are all pretty cheap. I know how it is, I have 3 kids and I am a student and my hubby is underemployed right now. I don't buy chips or popcorn or anything. Don't give into the kids demands. You are the parent and decide what they eat.

JuneBPrice

Oh, and ramen noodles! They're not exactly the healthiest food in the world, but there are times when my family wouldn't be able to make it without them. For my brother Foster (he's 15) they're a lifesaver, because he eats pretty much nonstop and we're not exactly in the *greatest* financial situation.

monkeynumber100

How much are your car payments and what do you owe on them? I'll get to my point in a bit.

Am I the only one intrigued here? I have 2 car payments on cars that are both about a year old. Would love to know how to save some cash! :-)

KatjaLynne

I empathize, I do. I have had similar experiences. I don't have any suggestions in particular but I can tell you what works for me.

- I don't buy junk food and thus no one eats it.
- Food is rationed strategically each meal by type of food (grain, veggies, fruit, meat, etc), how much of each is available, how many people there are, how much they will need realistically, and how much will need to be saved if any.
- Everyone is given 1 serving size (or a little less if it's a wee one) of each type of food offered in a meal. No one gets to take more until everyone has had some (sometimes "everyone" can include people who are not yet home).
- Leftovers are used for lunches, sides for dinners, or to make entire other entrees.
- I substitute healthier snacks for junk food and I don't just mean carrot sticks and raisins. Things like baked sweet potato fries instead of chips or oatmeal cookies made without sugar, oil or eggs but instead with applesauce, some sort of dried fruit, and honey.
- What is here is what is available, you eat what there is or you don't eat at all. It doesn't take long, in my experience, for one to eat what there is.
- If anyone gives me crap about all of the food that "we don't have" because they are "starving", I remind them of what it's like to actually starve. I remind them to be grateful. This doesn't work all the time but it does a lot of the time. If nothing else it will potentially encourage some thought for future good decision making.

glassbirdhouse

I'm going to echo what I consider the best piece of advice in this thread so far:

Stop Buying Junk Food.

Convenience items, even when on sale, are still a waste of money. Especially if your house is running through them like water. Spend that money on more things to bulk out the meals you prepare, and things they have to actually cook for themselves.

RunMyOregonBunsOff

Buy a small locking fridge for what you need for your meals. Continue to cook meals for them but no chips etc. put leftovers from dinner that they don't eat in fridge. Mark their own containers, whatever. When they cry hungry again send them to their leftovers. If they don't want that they probably are not really hungry.

This is the ideal solution if you ask me. It was like she was reading my mind!

If this isn't an option, I say lock up the food and they can earn it back. The problem with that is that this is summer time, they are boys and the first time you are in the shower they will be picking or removing the lock.

ExplorinLauren

I dunno, we have 3 boys (and a young girl) who eat us out of house and home. I have no idea how you spend $75 per week (Our average grocery bill is around $200 per week). We don't buy garbage, but the boys are hungry and eat whatever isn't nailed down. I consider it a "price" we pay for having children. No one made my wife and I have 4 kids. so we consider it our responsibility. With boys, comes a larger grocery bill, I don't know of anyone who has pre-teen and teen boys in which they DON'T eat them out of house and home. It's just how they are. So instead of having expensive cars or vacations, etc our money instead goes to daycare and groceries. We do what we can to save costs here and there, but in the end, kids aren't cheap! But we knew those were the "costs" and the joy our kids bring in our lives is worth many, many, many times the cost over.

So for me personally, it's not a big deal and I don't sweat it.

This. I have 4 kids, and feel the same way. lol

Also, stop buying junk... or anything for that matter if they wont eat dinner. I mean, they probably wont eat dinner because they are eating doritos and 40 pks of yogurt that day. lol

Why don't you take them to a soup kitchen to volunteer once or twice? Maybe then they will realize what not having food really means.

And if all else fails, get the locked cabinet.... and keep junk locked UNTIL they have eaten the right food first. But if they are hungry teenage boys already doing the things you're saying... they are prob going to find a way into it anyway

Chrystibel

I was going to say stop buying junk food but looks like everyone else has that covered.

If they are hungry, they will eat whatever is available.

coraliethomas

Seriously, they wont let themselves starve to death... letting them eat snacks and crap isnt very good for them. I reckon if all they got to eat was what you cooked, they'd start eating it pretty quickly, or find a way to work odd jobs to make enough money to buy snacks for themselves (thats what I did, mowed lawns and such to be able to buy yummy stuff my parents wouldnt allow in the house).

Nothing wrong with not giving them junk... in fact, you are doing them a favor!

Mindmovesbody

Recoiljpr...... if they would EAT the food I made and not ALL the snacks and junk and treats in one or two days I wouldn't care.

Well, then don't get snacks for a few weeks and only give them plenty of food you cook. They will eat it, I promise they won't starve. :-)

Yeah, it sucks you can't keep a few treats for yourself, but for now that's really your only choice. Show them you mean business by not buying a single snack food for a while. They will get the picture.

This! Stop buying snacks! One a month maybe and ration them out into baggies with names on them. Offer healthier snacks. If produce is expensive where you are hit up farmers markets. They are probably hungry all the time because what they are eating is not nutrient dense.

You give them two choices, TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT! My parents did this and it worked. They won't starve but by continuing to buy junk you are enabling them to continue the same behaviors. As a mother of a child who was over weight until I put my foot down and stopped being in denial, I can relate but YOU ARE THE PARENT!

arellolson

Growing up, we did not have the "snacks" that kids have today. My parents never bough chips. Those were for parties, picnics or if I went on a class field trip where I had to bring my lunch. It was a big deal to get chips or pizza (once every six months, maybe) and things like that.

My recommendation to you is to cut out the snacks and buy them fresh fruit to eat. When I was a kid, I remember reading an article about a mom who could buy all this food for $16.00. The thing that I really remember about it was that for snacks her boys ate slices of green bell pepper. I remember thinking, "Yuck! Those kids are so unlucky!" But that was probably the best thing for them. And they really ate it up. If the chips are not in your house, your sons can't eat them. Try to have them eat chopped up veggies instead with ranch dressing or peanut butter.

This is easy for me to tell you and I was the kind of mom that bought my kids chips and junk for snacks as well, so I know that even though I am telling you to take them out, it is not easy. So good luck!

What about stretching your milk with powdered milk? You can add it to regular milk. My mom would do that, and I never realized it.

Hang in there!

emmeylou

Hello I also know what it's like to live off of tiny, tiny grocery budgets. It stinks, plain and simple. And with 3 boys?? I have no idea how you do it! In my family there is myself (21), my mom, and my baby sister (6) and we have trouble keeping up sometimes.

I have to agree with a lot of people about ditching the snacks, at least some of them. Certain snacks, like chips, are what I call "slider foods", meaning that you can eat hordes of them without feeling "full" (makes sense since they squish down so little when you chew them). I wouldn't even have them in the house at all. Its just not worth it, even though they are cheap.

I second the person who suggested the "make it yourself popcorn". Not only is it healthier, but it is cheaper and easy to make. You can make it in large quantities and put it in baggies, it will keep for a couple days.

The milk... not sure what to say on that one. On the one hand, it is good for them and its pretty much a must-have when it comes to cereal. I would maybe tell them "once its gone, i'm not buying anymore" and make them eat their cereal dry or with water.

As much as I'm generally against having spaghetti as the main part of your meal, there is no denying that it is both cheap AND filling. Maybe make extra the nights you make it for dinner, so that it is around for a couple days as "snacks" or lunches. Bread and peanut butter is another great one since it is filling. Frozen grapes are the only way we have "fresh" fruit in our house, but my sister loves them. Grapes are probably the cheapest fruit you can get. You could buy it on sale, place them flat on a cookie sheet overnight and then transfer them into a baggie to store (so they don't freeze together). It tastes sweeter this way (according to my sister) and is a very healthy snack for her.

As for staying away from YOUR foods. I would get either a box (that is not deep, like the cardboard when you buy bottled water) or a storage container that fits in your fridge. Label it "MOM"S FOOD, DO NOT TOUCH" and place your yogurt, your milk (maybe buy them the gallon and a half gallon or a small bottle for yourself), etc, in this. Tell them they can have whatever they want that is NOT in that box, and that once its gone, its gone and too bad. If they won't respect your items that are clearly labelled, then this is a deeper issue.

This also reminds me of something we did for my sister when she was too young to understand what was "okay" to snack on and what wasn't. I did the box thing I mentioned above and every night I, or my mom, would make sure all of her "approved" foods were in there. We would put cheese sticks, yogurt, fruit, etc. But we would only put ONE cheese stick in the box or ONE granola bar or a baggie with a handful of crackers. She did not have to ask for a snack, because she knew she was allowed whatever was in the box. If she ate it, it was gone and she would have to chose something else. Maybe this would work for your boys? Make them eat a section. I know its in the fridge, but you could put ONE bag of popcorn in their box. Maybe if they could visualize what is allowed and what isn't it would help?

It sounds like your main problem is keeping them away from it. But since they are obviously little blood hounds, I still think the best thing is to simply not have those items in the house. We've also had to get food from a food pantry before, it stinks and it is humbling, but it is worth it when you truly need it. They also often have non-food items like toilet paper that can really add to a grocery bill. (((hugs))) Hang in there, and good luck!

sarahazelnut99

Your kids might need counseling. When i was a kid i use to binge eat everything around me- as an adult i realized i was only doing it because i was SO lonely, and had so many responsibilities. If you have any kind of health insurance and you believe that there may be SOME reason that your kids would be suffering emotionally you might want to see if you can get them some help. I know it might sound a little strange but when i think back to my childhood i realize how much pain i was in even though both of my parents were there and tried there best with me.

Those habits are still with me which is why i am on this site today.

http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/GettingHealthy/Dietary-Recommendations-for-Healthy-Children_UCM_303886_Article.jsp

Also i would check and make sure your kids are actually over eating - 14 year old boys need about 2200 calories per day- and if they are involved with any kind of sports this will increase quite significantly

bryantparson

What my mom did:

Stopped buying junk food. Seriously, just stop.

Cooked 2-3 times a week, but would fill up the fridge with tupperware. She'd cook food for 2-3 days each time and just put it in the fridge in "portions" so if we were hungry, we could go in, grab a tupperware meal, microwave it and be done. It worked really nicely because we were too lazy to cook, but we couldn't use the "there's no food" argument because there was, and it gave us a pretty well rounded diet.

airangel59

I don't have kids but if you don't want them eating junk, don't buy it like the other posters have said.

Do you have a nice 99c store by you? We've got one here that has bags of fruit/veggies, lots of brand and off brand food for 99c or under. Any grocery should have the bags of "cheaper" cereals so you aren't spending $3-4 on a box.

Personally if I had the issue you are going thru, I'd lock half the stock up so there wouldn't be as much accessible food for them to get into, since I'm sure you don't want to shop twice for the weeks food. Especially if you can't be home to watch them during the day.

Kids have to learn rules and you have to show them who's boss and what they can & can't have.

Not that pasta,rice & bean dishes are mega nutritious but they are affordable and filling. Are they kids eating their lunch/dinner or just eating junk and snack foods to fill up?

lisanorman6

It's not my place to tell people how to parent - all I can do is share my own experience. For myself, I had to stop enabling poor eating habits for my kids. In my quest to change my life and be healthy, I knew I had to get the kids on board. The first month was extremely unpleasant and they complained every.single.day. But now, a few months into the journey, their tune is pretty different. I had to stop purchasing junk food. Other posters are spot on. Quit buying the mindless eating foods. Keep your fridge and pantry full of fruits, veggies, jello, etc.

Prepare yourself: they'll freak out. They'll complain. They'll tell you they're going to die because they're so hungry. I promise, they will survive! And so you will you.

Set your boundaries and most importantly....keep them.

May I ask something personal? Are your kids thankful for the food they have? I know mine were not. I started making bags for homeless people to keep in my car and involved my kids in it. Doing that gave us the opportunity to discuss that while sometimes we have to keep a crazy tight budget, we have what we need. As my kids began handing out these bags, they began to discover that others go hungry. Others have no bed to sleep in. Others don't have a family like ours. Perhaps it might be good for your kids to volunteer at a food bank or get involved in a service project. Just my opinion, but changing what you keep in your pantry is part of the issue. There is a heart-issue involved as well.

Hang in there. You are diligent in providing for them, you're diligent in loving them. Be diligent in helping them learn the value of what you bring home for them to consume.

Pandorian

Watch your unit prices when you're buying, you mentioned you make your bread at home, great to hear (big fan of home-made bread), but do you buy your flour in (my local prices from my last trip out) 5lb bags at $7, 10lb bags at $11 or do you have a whole-sale club (Costco, restaurant supplies etc) where you can get 25lbs for $12.50, 5 times the flour for less than twice the price. See if you've got a LDS cannery near you and what their requirements are, some seem to sell to the public, some you have to come with a member, they've got 25lbs of oats for $15 that's a whole lot of breakfasts covered on the cheap but you can always buy the instant single serve packs at $5 for 10 packs and it takes me 2 to feel like I've eaten.

Take a look, you can probably buy a whole bunch of popcorn kernels for less than a bag of potato chips or a package of those "treat / snack" bags to take to school etc.

lil_bit_crazy

I really don't know where else to go to get ideas or vent. I am on my cell phone so yeah, I'll be txt typing.

I have a VERY limited budget for food. As in @$75 per week for 5 people and 3 of those are growing boys.
I buy healthy lasting items (freezer bulk things) and try to get a few things like a bag or 2 of chips or popcorn for a snack to last a few days.

Today I went to the store and spent $35 on enough food for 4 days. I got 2 gallons of milk and cereal for them for the next 2 mornings. They have been told over and over and over DRINK WATER or koolaid.

Tonight I go in the kitchen to get my 8 oz milk with my protein mix....ALL the cereal is gone. There is no milk left. The chips are gone. I am almost completely out of food again! This happens every time I go to the store!
There is hamburger chicken potatoes green beans corn carrots and water left until Saturday.

When I make food they wont eat it. Then cry they are hungry. I am not a short order cook. This is not a restaurant. If I cook breakfast lunch dinner from now til Saturday the food wont last.

I thought of getting a locking cabinet but I shouldn't have to lock up food.
They are pigs. They are inconsiderate and thoughtless. This has gone on for MONTHS!
I have grounded, taken things, stopped buying treats, and yes I've busted their *kitten*. I don't care that they eat SOME but they eat ALL. Example ..I'll buy the 25 pk of popcorn for 2 weeks. Every last one is GONE within 2 DAYS. I've tried hiding food. Locking my bedroom door. Doesn't work. They ask to get something like batteries and go in, next thing ya know popcorn has 1 by 1 disappeared.
They aren't starving. They are healthy and active.
what would you do? I'm so tired of running out of food because they think they have to eat it all the day I buy it.

Is this Alec Baldwin? They are growing boys they need to eat. If they are old enough to cook stop buying the junk and buy more whole foods and make them cook it.

It's my job and responsibility to cook for my kids. They are kids. Being inconsiderate means they eat everything in the house without thinking anyone may want some of it.


This doesn't mean just snacks. I am talking about apples, oranges, nuts, bananas, grapes, shredded wheat cereal, corn flakes, plain yogurt strawberries .....you name it, even healthy snacks...they have NO CONTROL!!!

zacksnana

How much are your car payments and what do you owe on them? I'll get to my point in a bit.

Hmmmmm. Do we have to start guessing? Anyone?

noogie98

Buy a small locking fridge for what you need for your meals. Continue to cook meals for them but no chips etc. put leftovers from dinner that they don't eat in fridge. Mark their own containers, whatever. When they cry hungry again send them to their leftovers. If they don't want that they probably are not really hungry.

^ This ^

When my son was a teenager, we had to do this. Hid the mini fridge in our closet, he never knew it was there. Once we quit buying chips, popcorn & other snacks and he realized the only thing there was to eat in the house was leftovers, he caved. I still have the fridge, by the way, and he is 28 now, still doesn't know about the fridge.

ash190489

As everyone else has already said - stop buying treats and snacks.

However, as a teacher, I know how difficult children can be sometimes, but keep in mind, you're the adult and you're in control. If they don't want to eat a healthy meal that you've prepared, then they don't get anything else. It will no doubt be difficult to begin with as I can imagine there will be LOTS of crying/tantrums to start with, but it's just so important that you ignore it to begin with until they've calmed down and then when they're ready to hear you out and be mature, that's your time to EDUCATE your children on their choices - particularly when it comes to food. Discuss that 'treats' are a 'sometimes' food - for in moderation, not as soon as you've done the grocery shopping it's all eaten up. Tell them WHY they're sometimes foods. Tell them WHY you don't want them in the house anymore (give them meaning and relate the concept to THEM as well as for the healthy and wellbeing of yourself. Children/Teens are so self absorbed so you need to relate this information to them to create meaning.

In the mean time, you can make a deal with them instead - if they can show you all week that they are being responsible for their health and wellbeing and eating the home made meals that you're preparing then on that next grocery shop you'll pick them each a yummy treat for them to eat (one each or a small amount - NOT a BULK pack of anything). Explain to them again that you've bought them only a small amount or one as a treat and consolidate their understandings of what this means. If someone doesn't comply with your arrangements - they miss out. Maybe they'll eat their meals the following week.

Life is tough. But they need to understand and be responsible for their health and wellbeing whilst they're young, because otherwise what kind of adults will they turn out to be? You don't want their health to be at stake.