can you date your brothers ex wife

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Replies

  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
    Two words - 'Uncle Daddy'

    This is exactly what I thought of. :laugh:
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,024 Member
    NO. Doesn't matter what the scenario is. You are just going to open up a giant can of worms.
  • iWaffle
    iWaffle Posts: 2,208 Member
    now you bring up they have a child together..

    Does he call you "uncle" or "dad"? Maybe it's "uncle-dad". :laugh:

    And if you two have kids will it be this boy's sister or his cousin? So confusing.
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
    I was going to say hey, it's your life. But the kid, that really makes it awkward. I think you should give this a lot of thought before proceeding. There are a lot of women out there who aren't related to you...
  • McLifterPants
    McLifterPants Posts: 457 Member
    Hey, go for it. I mean, in biblical times you'd probably have been obliged to marry her, or stone her to death. Not really sure which one applies.

    Don't stone her to death.

    :laugh:

    Fantastic :)
  • brandon0523
    brandon0523 Posts: 516
    ok point taken
  • akaporn
    akaporn Posts: 231 Member
    Just imagine all the possible complications and multiply them by 10 times. If it still worth it? Go for it!
  • BigDaddyRonnie
    BigDaddyRonnie Posts: 506 Member
    Dude...there is man code in there somewhere.

    Take it slow. You are bound to piss someone off somewhere when the news gets out. Yes there is a long length of time that obviously has some drama built into it.

    Take it slow, dude, take it slow.
  • BigDaddyBRC
    BigDaddyBRC Posts: 2,395 Member
    Given my brother's history in choices of women...no. Go back to when we were kids...we always stole the other's girlfriends...so, I could if he picked up better women :smokin:
  • Quasita
    Quasita Posts: 1,530 Member
    Going to weigh in as one of the only people to say I don't really see an issue with this if you are open about it and tread carefully. The kid doesn't have to call you 'Uncle Dad" and any future kids you had together would be their half siblings. To me, this is no different than when a partner passes away and that person's brother/sister ends up with their widowed spouse. It's more common than you think.

    If you go for it though, make sure you keep your distance for any child support hearings and family court proceedings. That is their business, not yours... and if you meddle, you could lose more than a brother, it could alienate you from a lot of family.
  • DanaDark
    DanaDark Posts: 2,187 Member
    You two are not direct blood related (increase chance of genetic abnormalities in offspring).

    I do not see why not.

    The only argument people here can offer against it is the lame idea of "bro code".

    Two individuals have every right to do what is right and best for them.
  • ethansmug
    ethansmug Posts: 159 Member
    Negatory!

    Dude.... Your brother put his junk in that. No. Just no


    We have a winner!!!!

    No matter what, you will always know your brother had his slimy penis in the place you wanna put your face (assuming you do that sorta thing).
    Nope.....just let it go man.
  • meerkat70
    meerkat70 Posts: 4,605 Member
    I don't see it as a necessary no. I think you should be cautious. I think you should think long and hard about how it would be taken by the child. I think you should weigh it up in the light of any remaining relationship you do have with your brother.

    I guess I'd also be questioning motivations. Why her, for you, and why you for her? Are there any lurking motivations that are *about* your relationships with your brother that might be fuelling the attraction?

    But if you've given it plenty of thought, and still feel it's something you want...I don't see why not. All the 'yuck' reactions seem to me to be linked to very outmoded social taboos.
  • ThustonHowell
    ThustonHowell Posts: 43
    First of all, the response saying it would be like sleeping with your brother is completely asinine. At least you've probably hugged your brother, I'm sure she's slept with a whole bunch of dudes you wouldn't touch.

    Second. I've seen a real life application of this and it worked. Husband cheated on his wife, not a bad woman, just not the BS crazy s*** he was looking for. After they divorced she started talking to his brother, well signing, the poor guy is deaf, and now they are married. Kid was on my son's baseball team that I coached and he was pretty well grounded. I'm no child psychologist and it doesn't mean he won't grow up to b***f*** bunny rabbits, but fwiw he was 7 and seemed to understand. These people are actually close and see each other on a weekly basis and they were able to contain their drama in public.

    Personally I wouldn't because my brother and I have a pretty good relationship, but it sounds like your in a different place so don't let conventional wisdom get in the way of trying this thing out. And yes you could be your nephew's Duncle, but marriage is a long way off from a cup of coffee and a screw.
  • BruteSquad
    BruteSquad Posts: 373 Member
    Me thinks beneath the thin veneer of sanity and likeability lies a deep DEEP psychosis in anyone that would say to their child, "he is only your uncle until we are married"

    Run away screaming.
  • pj12string
    pj12string Posts: 128 Member
    If you had to ask the question, I think you already know your answer. Don't look for people on here to validate you, when you already know its wrong.
  • hkevans724
    hkevans724 Posts: 241 Member
    Sure Uncle Daddy, You can date her.. Unless you are really close to your brother and then he should kick you in the head.. But on the other had if the douche hasn't seen his son in years you should kick him in the head and go out with her :)
  • LonLB
    LonLB Posts: 1,126 Member
    First of all, the response saying it would be like sleeping with your brother is completely asinine. At least you've probably hugged your brother, I'm sure she's slept with a whole bunch of dudes you wouldn't touch.

    Second. I've seen a real life application of this and it worked. Husband cheated on his wife, not a bad woman, just not the BS crazy s*** he was looking for. After they divorced she started talking to his brother, well signing, the poor guy is deaf, and now they are married. Kid was on my son's baseball team that I coached and he was pretty well grounded. I'm no child psychologist and it doesn't mean he won't grow up to b***f*** bunny rabbits, but fwiw he was 7 and seemed to understand. These people are actually close and see each other on a weekly basis and they were able to contain their drama in public.

    Personally I wouldn't because my brother and I have a pretty good relationship, but it sounds like your in a different place so don't let conventional wisdom get in the way of trying this thing out. And yes you could be your nephew's Duncle, but marriage is a long way off from a cup of coffee and a screw.


    butt ****ing bunny rabbits eh?:laugh:
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    Negatory!

    Dude.... Your brother put his junk in that. No. Just no

    I love you :)
  • Espressocycle
    Espressocycle Posts: 2,245 Member
    The heart wants what it wants, as the great Woody Allen once said. Stranger things have happened. Give it a try - if it works out, then anybody who matters in your life will accept it. If it doesn't, you can just never mention it.
  • pa_jorg
    pa_jorg Posts: 4,404 Member
    "This is my uncle... Wait, no, my step-dad... wait, no, my uncle..."

    or my uncle who likes to bang my mom... what!?

    None of these options is good for the kid! Don't do it!
  • sarahp86
    sarahp86 Posts: 692 Member
    Nope. Not in this lifetime. Besides, your brother divorced her pretty quick. Must be a reason.

    Yeah, he might be the reason!
  • itgeekwoman
    itgeekwoman Posts: 804 Member
    so not worth it! Just walk away!
  • Sharyn913
    Sharyn913 Posts: 777 Member
    You want your brothers sloppy seconds? Out of six billion people in the world, there is no one else?

    Really?
    '
    Surely you can find someone else that makes you laugh.
  • suzzann666
    suzzann666 Posts: 334 Member
    not the best idea i've heard today...
  • Hellbent_Heidi
    Hellbent_Heidi Posts: 3,669 Member
    Initial reaction is no...but stranger things have worked out for people. I guess it depends how close you are to your brother, and whether it would bother him or not.

    Maybe you and her are perfect for each other...you never know! Everyone has a past...and yeah, she slept with your brother, but past a certain age, everyone has slept with SOMEONE!
  • drmerc
    drmerc Posts: 2,603 Member
    JERRY JERRY JERRY
  • karijoeide
    karijoeide Posts: 103
    Personally any ex of my family/friends is completely off limits...
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    Negatory!

    Dude.... Your brother put his junk in that. No. Just no


    We have a winner!!!!

    No matter what, you will always know your brother had his slimy penis in the place you wanna put your face (assuming you do that sorta thing).
    Nope.....just let it go man.

    LOL! Your elaboration makes for a double win!

    That aside, at face value, it may not seem like a horrid idea but when you bring the kid, the rest of the family, your friends, etc into the picture, it just gets all messy and sounds like major drama watiing to happen. Sorry dude...
  • kmm7309
    kmm7309 Posts: 802 Member
    How would you explain that to your nephew-eventually son? I have two step-sons and they are my world and they are my sons. If you take on your nephew as a son, it just gets too complicated for the child. I just think long term, this could end badly for your nephew. He will be so messed up on the idea of how relationships work.
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