can you date your brothers ex wife

Hellbent_Heidi

Wow....after all of the crap that she had to go through with your brother....Why in the world would that woman even look at another male from your family?Messy...Messy!

My husband has 3 brothers and they're all VERY, VERY different from each other. I wouldn't have touched two of my brother in laws with ten foot poles, so you can't necessarily use that as a measurement of someone's relationship worthiness...

Linbo93

Don't stone her to death.

I don't know what I'd do in your situation.

But I can second this, a solid piece of advice!

Poorgirls_Diet

I would say no or else speak to your brother first and if he is agreeable then yea go for it. But stop and think first how confusing this would be on your brothers children, not to mention if you and her are going to have children again.

However does she really love you or is she trying to get back at your brother?

I honestly think you know what you are going to do yourself but just wanted reassurance from someone else. No matter if you hate your brother or get on with him you NEED to sit down and discuss the matter openly and without this girl nearby. Just don't do something that you will regret later. In all fairness blood is thicker than water and don't let someone come between your family, believe me, its not worth it for lustful feelings

phinphanbill26

Your brother sounds like the type that would not consent to the relationship...so I say give it a try.

jeffrodgers1

Two words - 'Uncle Daddy'

Oh this so reaks of...

Many, many years ago when I was twenty-three I was married to a widow who was pretty as could be This widow had a grown-up daughter who had hair of red My father fell in love with her and soon they too were wed
This made my dad my son-in-law and really changed my life For now my daughter was my mother, 'cause she was my father's wife And to complicate the matter, even though it brought me joy I soon became the father of a bouncing baby boy
My little baby then became a brother-in-law to dad And so became my uncle, though it made me very sad For if he were my uncle, then that also made him brother Of the widow's grownup daughter, who was of course my step-mother
Father's wife then had a son who kept them on the run And he became my grandchild, for he was my daughter's son My wife is now my mother's mother and it makes me blue Because although she is my wife, she's my grandmother too
Now if my wife is my grandmother, then I'm her grandchild And every time I think of it, it nearly drives me wild 'Cause now I have become the strangest 'case you ever saw As husband of my grandmother, I am my own grandpa
I'm my own grandpa, I'm my own grandpa It sounds funny, I know but it really is so I'm my own grandpa

ashlinmarie

yeah they did divorce for a reason.. they where both in the air force and when SHE was deployed to iraq he cheated on her

Okay, I was going to say a big ole no, but reading this it seems like your brother is the **** and if you don't talk to him and he doesn't talk to her, it would be better for your nephew to have an uncle as a father figure than some random guy. I would recommend taking things VERY slow though...get to know each other well. Yeah, it might be confusing at first but I work with a girl who has a nephew that is a few months younger than her because her dad is his grandpa or however that works. It takes all sorts to make families!

LaurySch

Hey, go for it. I mean, in biblical times you'd probably have been obliged to marry her, or stone her to death. Not really sure which one applies.

Don't stone her to death.

This made me laugh! Taking her out for a drink to see if you actually have a chance does not mean you hate your brother! If the rest of your family seems okay with it and you are obviously wanting to, then who am I to say no. I'd say go slow and make sure everyone involved is cool with where things are going.

gwduker

I have heard of worse scenerios. Heck, I used to live with my ex brother-in-laws ex wife and I'm not even from Kentucky! :bigsmile:

Sounds like you and your brother aren't close to make it an issue. Follow your heart.

Babsvii

So you are going to play Uncle and Step daddy??? UH NO WAY! totally off limits. that is just too weird. there are many other women in this world... maybe if they didn't have a kid this would be semi ok if you asked his permission or how he would feel but how do you explain that to the child? does the kid now call you dad even though you are really his uncle? strange.

lizziebeth1028

I would never pursue a relationship that sounds complicated from the get go. There are just too many fish in the sea my friend.....keep fishin!

DeeVanderbles

Two words - 'Uncle Daddy'

:drinker:

jonward85

My wife's best friend was dating her (now husband)'s cousin when they met. Her husband and his cousin were living together and she left the cousin to be with he husband...i'm sure it's a little odd a family gatherings, but they're happy and after 10+yrs no one seems to even think twice of it....my opinion...still weird, but hey...stranger things have happened.

ElizabethRoad

I find it interesting that so many people are focused mainly on the fact that your relationship to the child wouldn't fit a certain label.

gwduker

Two words - 'Uncle Daddy'

Oh this so reaks of...

Many, many years ago when I was twenty-three I was married to a widow who was pretty as could be This widow had a grown-up daughter who had hair of red My father fell in love with her and soon they too were wed
This made my dad my son-in-law and really changed my life For now my daughter was my mother, 'cause she was my father's wife And to complicate the matter, even though it brought me joy I soon became the father of a bouncing baby boy
My little baby then became a brother-in-law to dad And so became my uncle, though it made me very sad For if he were my uncle, then that also made him brother Of the widow's grownup daughter, who was of course my step-mother
Father's wife then had a son who kept them on the run And he became my grandchild, for he was my daughter's son My wife is now my mother's mother and it makes me blue Because although she is my wife, she's my grandmother too
Now if my wife is my grandmother, then I'm her grandchild And every time I think of it, it nearly drives me wild 'Cause now I have become the strangest 'case you ever saw As husband of my grandmother, I am my own grandpa
I'm my own grandpa, I'm my own grandpa It sounds funny, I know but it really is so I'm my own grandpa

You either know that polka, or you are the guy I was stationed with!!

eatcleanNtraindirty

Sorry but it just ain't right! There's plenty of fish in the sea! Find one your brother hasn't slept with.

BuffyEat2Live

Why not? The world needs more Uncle Daddies.

jeffrodgers1

Two words - 'Uncle Daddy'

Oh this so reaks of...

Many, many years ago when I was twenty-three I was married to a widow who was pretty as could be This widow had a grown-up daughter who had hair of red My father fell in love with her and soon they too were wed
This made my dad my son-in-law and really changed my life For now my daughter was my mother, 'cause she was my father's wife And to complicate the matter, even though it brought me joy I soon became the father of a bouncing baby boy
My little baby then became a brother-in-law to dad And so became my uncle, though it made me very sad For if he were my uncle, then that also made him brother Of the widow's grownup daughter, who was of course my step-mother
Father's wife then had a son who kept them on the run And he became my grandchild, for he was my daughter's son My wife is now my mother's mother and it makes me blue Because although she is my wife, she's my grandmother too
Now if my wife is my grandmother, then I'm her grandchild And every time I think of it, it nearly drives me wild 'Cause now I have become the strangest 'case you ever saw As husband of my grandmother, I am my own grandpa
I'm my own grandpa, I'm my own grandpa It sounds funny, I know but it really is so I'm my own grandpa

You either know that polka, or you are the guy I was stationed with!!

Don't think its a polka... it's Ray Stevens.

Hellbent_Heidi

I find it interesting that so many people are focused mainly on the fact that your relationship to the child wouldn't fit a certain label.

Same here...especially since the OP noted that his brother hasn't seen the kid in years and doesn't pay child support. I'm guessing he could use a father figure at this point, and so what if its technically his uncle? Its not like they broke up last week and the brother is devasated over losing his wife...doesn't seem like that big of a deal in today's society (there are much worse situations out there).

jonward85

Two words - 'Uncle Daddy'

Oh this so reaks of...

Many, many years ago when I was twenty-three I was married to a widow who was pretty as could be This widow had a grown-up daughter who had hair of red My father fell in love with her and soon they too were wed
This made my dad my son-in-law and really changed my life For now my daughter was my mother, 'cause she was my father's wife And to complicate the matter, even though it brought me joy I soon became the father of a bouncing baby boy
My little baby then became a brother-in-law to dad And so became my uncle, though it made me very sad For if he were my uncle, then that also made him brother Of the widow's grownup daughter, who was of course my step-mother
Father's wife then had a son who kept them on the run And he became my grandchild, for he was my daughter's son My wife is now my mother's mother and it makes me blue Because although she is my wife, she's my grandmother too
Now if my wife is my grandmother, then I'm her grandchild And every time I think of it, it nearly drives me wild 'Cause now I have become the strangest 'case you ever saw As husband of my grandmother, I am my own grandpa
I'm my own grandpa, I'm my own grandpa It sounds funny, I know but it really is so I'm my own grandpa

OMG i love this song. Thanks for the trip down memory road. I think my coworkes all think im crazy because i started humming this....LOL im still dieing.

coachblt

I just can't picture the whole thing. If my mother and father divorced and then my mother married my uncle? I'd go ape *kitten*.

This guy has a choice and asked everyone to respond. Seems most think it's a bad idea, but I don't think he wants those type answers. He wants opinions to coincide with his, which is fine too. We don't have to live in his world.

Good luck with that!