We are pleased to announce that as of March 4, 2025, an updated Rich Text Editor has been introduced in the MyFitnessPal Community. To learn more about the changes, please click here. We look forward to sharing this new feature with you!

Chuck Norris...

1356

Replies

  • koen612
    koen612 Posts: 83
    Chuck Norris traveled to Isla de Sorna and killed a pack of velociraptors with one hand and his beard tied behind his back . :laugh:
  • darrensurrey
    darrensurrey Posts: 3,942 Member
    :laugh: at all of the replies.
  • WendyFitMomCHANGED
    WendyFitMomCHANGED Posts: 311 Member
    Chuck Norris isn't on Twitter because no one can follow Chuck Norris
  • dward2011
    dward2011 Posts: 416 Member
    Chuck Norris knows where Carmen Sandiego is.
  • esq2man
    esq2man Posts: 30
    There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
  • nashtyone
    nashtyone Posts: 36
    God said "let there be light", Chuck Norris said "say please"
  • goodfido
    goodfido Posts: 127 Member
    Chuck Norris is the only one that Can Prevent a Forrest Fire.
  • WendyFitMomCHANGED
    WendyFitMomCHANGED Posts: 311 Member
    Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
  • markymarrkk
    markymarrkk Posts: 495 Member
    at the hospital a man showed up who had fallen from a 3 story window and when asked how he managed to only have minor scrapes and bruises he responded simply.... " I'm a distant relative to Chuck Norris"
  • markymarrkk
    markymarrkk Posts: 495 Member
    Bruce Lee is way more bad *kitten* than Chuck Norris... if Chuck Norris was such a bad *kitten* he would sense my **** talking and show up behind ready to bash my face into the keyboafshi;hkl d m'adg 'hkD F a;fkldaeiu84qu9c c4m8a4=-cmag uymn-ay84 ag8-yhy8-f9jl' FH dkkdhl;s kl;h ;k ;havsas ppa vh;FL'
  • cmpollard01
    cmpollard01 Posts: 246
    MythBusters confirmed the Chuck Norris facts.

    A carton of orange juice concentrates on Chuck Norris.

    Mother Nature says, "Don't fool with Chuck Norris."
  • Chuckie has a picture of me in his locker for inspiration!!!!

    Chuck Norris wears Chief's pajamas to bed.
  • digitalbill
    digitalbill Posts: 1,410 Member
    Chuck Norris impregnated "Octomom" by simply thinking about it.
  • cobracars
    cobracars Posts: 949 Member
    Superman has pictures of Chuck Norris on his underoos
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
    Chuck Norris never calls a wrong number. You just answer the wrong phone.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • ladyfox1979
    ladyfox1979 Posts: 405 Member
    Chuck Norris doesn't stop at a STOP sign. The STOP sign stops for Chuck Norris
  • bikechic61
    bikechic61 Posts: 39
    I once heard that when you're typing about Chuck Norris he sneaks up behind you and bangs your head on the keyb......fdlkc;dcfddsls;pplo;p

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • taylor5877
    taylor5877 Posts: 1,792 Member
    Chuck Norris can speak braille..

    Hellen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris...
  • EDesq
    EDesq Posts: 1,527 Member
    Whats your favorite Chuck Norris line?


    I never heard about the "Chuck Norris-isms" until about 3 months ago. HEY, Why would I, I'm NOT a Nerd!
  • IamSheaMc
    IamSheaMc Posts: 1,273 Member
    Whats your favorite Chuck Norris line?


    I never heard about the "Chuck Norris-isms" until about 3 months ago. HEY, Why would I, I'm NOT a Nerd!

    Watch your back Chuck Norris hears when you type about him!
  • digitalbill
    digitalbill Posts: 1,410 Member
    Whats your favorite Chuck Norris line?


    I never heard about the "Chuck Norris-isms" until about 3 months ago. HEY, Why would I, I'm NOT a Nerd!
    Chuck Norris can read your mind and enter your dreams.
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
    :laugh:
    Whats your favorite Chuck Norris line?


    I never heard about the "Chuck Norris-isms" until about 3 months ago. HEY, Why would I, I'm NOT awesome!

    There. I fixed that for ya. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • I once heard that when you're typing about Chuck Norris he sneaks up behind you and bangs your head on the keyb......fdlkc;dcfddsls;pplo;p

    Nice one
  • Mctree20
    Mctree20 Posts: 137
    Whats your favorite Chuck Norris line?


    I never heard about the "Chuck Norris-isms" until about 3 months ago. HEY, Why would I, I'm NOT a Nerd!

    xljtzp.jpg
  • Overheard: "A vampire once tried to bite Chuck Norris" "But there are no vampires." "Exactly..."
  • IamSheaMc
    IamSheaMc Posts: 1,273 Member
    Overheard: "A vampire once tried to bite Chuck Norris" "But there are no vampires." "Exactly..."

    I heard you named yourself after what Chuck Norris did to that mountain
  • Sbehlmer
    Sbehlmer Posts: 464 Member
    Chuck Norris visits an active volcano every morning to get some of the "best damn expresso on Earth"
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
  • Krizzo87
    Krizzo87 Posts: 14,186 Member
    Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
  • iLuvJohnny
    iLuvJohnny Posts: 51
    Chuck Norris killed two stones with one bird.
This discussion has been closed.