embarrassment after losing weight?

BarbWhite09

IM SO GLAD IM NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO FEELS LIKE THAT! I just feel SO awkward when people mention my weight loss...Like I just want to go hide in a cave.

delilah47

When someone asks, I usually say "I've been working on it." As for the comments about your healthy food. They are just jealous ... and stupid for saying stupid things about your food. I don't know what gets into people sometimes. :noway:

Qskim

You know when you go to a beach day after day and it's fascinating how the sand has shifted? You think about the weight of that sand and the force of water it took to move it? Most people when they c a weight loss have a similar kind of fascination. We c something every week in the media about obesity being an epidemic and yet you stand before them having conquered it. You are a lesson, a wonder and an example. Not everyone is jealous or trying to interrupt your effort..they are applauding the hard work you've achieved. Stand before them and own it and be gracious and understand their fascination. Losing the weight isn't the only example you are giving, how you live with who you've become is just as inspiring.

HakunaMatata519

I think a big part of it is the embarrassment of what was "before". When people compliment me about HOW much I've lost, I feel like they KNOW how big I used to be and it makes me bummed that I ever let myself get that way... or that they had noticed how big I had gotten. Make sense?! LOL

You should just come up with something you say everytime someone notices so you KNOW what your reply will be. Maybe "Thanks for noticing!" or something simple.

ShrinkingShona

I think a big part of it is the embarrassment of what was "before". When people compliment me about HOW much I've lost, I feel like they KNOW how big I used to be and it makes me bummed that I ever let myself get that way... or that they had noticed how big I had gotten. Make sense?! LOL

You should just come up with something you say everytime someone notices so you KNOW what your reply will be. Maybe "Thanks for noticing!" or something simple.

Stephaniew519, I was just going to write exactly the same thing. I have not been losing weight for that long but I am already incredibly uncomfortable with people mentioning it. When I get congratulations the best I can muster is a quiet "Errrr.... thanks". And it is mostly because I am embarrassed about how large I let my own body get in the first place. After a traumatic start to the year, it was like a light bulb went off in my head & the whole "Calories in, calories used" business just suddenly made sense. It's not been entirely easy, but I have an incredible sense of self determination about my future health/weight. I can't believe I let myself live a miserable, self hating life for the 20 years before that, when fixing it was completely within my control. So, that's the sort of stuff that goes through my head on the rare occasion someone mentions it. In some ways I am really looking forward to meeting new people in future who never knew me as that fat woman.

mmickeep

I like when people give me compliments, but they ask me how much I have lost, what I am eating, what exercise I do, how much I weigh. They ask too many questions!

MJH5773

I like when people give me compliments, but they ask me how much I have lost, what I am eating, what exercise I do, how much I weigh. They ask too many questions!

I feel the same way! They start becoming way too inquisitive. I'm happy to help but it starts becoming frustrating after a while.

I have a question somewhat pertaining to this topic. When someone does start complimenting you on our weight loss, does anyone ever feel obligated to compliment them about something in return? I am sometimes able to come up with something or change the subject pretty well but other times it gets really awkward.

freespiritistaken

Yes,this happens to me too. When they compliment me,I'm usually like "maybe a little,not sure though" or worse i may be like "if u say so... " I'm very shy and when I get any kind of compliment i act weird..... But it's cool when people notice.

KeriW626

ok, as of today I have lost 50lbs for the year, the fastest part since I joined MFP. However; even having lost the 50 lbs, I dont see any changes. Others do, if they say anything to me about me losing weight, or getting skinny. I just tell them, No actually I am finally getting healthy. End of subject, unless of course they would like to join me for some dancing or raw zucchini, my new loves.

I will be dong something totally out of character, I am going to a Luau, I am going to wear the Hawaiian dress I have worn for the past two years, and under it my new sarong. I still have 60 lbs to go, so I am sure I will not impress anyone there except my good friends. woohoo for me.. lets see if I feel uncomfortable in the sarong.

I wish you all luck and hope you become more and more comfortable with the changes you have made. The you, that you are and always have been.

munchlaxx

I can never handle compliments. I can't even handle them from my dude...and we've lived together for 4 years so far. He recently told me I have become more "sexy" and I just stared at him while my face felt bright red. :blushing:

Mdin1029

So glad to hear how many others feels this way. I also was playing it down and saying things like "you think" Now I just do what someone said, have programmed response "yeah i've been trying to be healthier" It is super weird when people ask how much weight you have lost though, or ask "have you lost weight?"

sparklelioness

I think you need some new 'closer friends', to be honest.

commanderthomas

A lot of these responses are kinda weird to me. Not being embarrassed about the compliments as much as some of the people who seem angry or offended by them? Seems pretty backward to me. Personally, I'm pretty proud of every pound I've lost and continue to lose, and my favorite topic of conversation is how having the mobile app of myfitnesspal helped me to do it. Already got 10 friends signed on. Though I do understand others being kind of shy about it.

But geez, little did I know I could piss someone off for supporting them and telling them they're doing a good job of working towards their goal. I'll keep that in mind when I'm cheering the runners on at the local 10k next week.

opuntia

I think any major change to your body makes you self-conscious, because people are looking at you and reacting to it, and your appearance becomes the centre of attention for a while.

I lost a bit of weight over the holidays, and when I went back to work I did wonder if people would notice and comment - and I was quite relieved that they didn't! I'm not embarrassed as such, but I prefer to focus on work and just blend in.

MissSusieQ

i've felt exactly the same. i work with a lady who couldn't leave it at 'you've lost weight' or 'you look good', it was always 'how much weight have you lost?' or even 'so what do you weigh now?', and even when i tried to give her vague, you're-making-me-uncomfortable answers, she'd keep at it.
i tried just telling myself that she's complimenting me, she means well, and she's just being her nice in her sort of in-your-face way, but it didn't change the fact that she made me feel really awkward!
in the end, i just started avoiding stopping for long talks with her for a while, till the newness of my weight loss wore off. it wasn't her fault, it wasn't mine.

MissSusieQ

Yes, I do get embarrassed because I don't like to draw attention to myself and the other day I got downright irritated at a Facebook friend who said she "didn't recognize me". The intention was kind, I am sure, but I am not "unrecognizable" dropping from a tight size 14 to a proper fitting 12. C'mon! Plus, it made me feel like I was Jabba the Hutt before. :-). I dunno, I guess I don't respond well to compliments from others?

ha ha, i had exactly the same thing happen!
I lost about 15kg quite quickly a few years back, and the change made me the talk of my work for a few weeks (particularly since i did a lot of the dramatic shape-changing while on holiday from work).
One of the girls i work with said to me one day 'you've lost a lot of weight Susan, you look great' - big compliment - but then followed it with 'i was looking back at photos from Jane's wedding and you were like *puffed out cheeks, wide arms, fat pose*'
i was like, 'um.. thanks? i think?'

NoSharpei

I dn't get embarrassed by my weight loss.. but I am taking time to get used to it. I recently referred to myself as overweight in a conversation. The woman I was talking to said, "..but you're not fat!" I was a bit confused until I looked hard in the mirror later in the day. I USED to be fat... but, because it's still me... just 60lbs less of me, I still have more or less the same mental image of myself!

bassmanlarry

My dad is constantly telling me I look sick and my my keeps saying I need to stop where I'm at. They complain about they can't lose weight, but then my mom keeps 200+ calorie snacks and ice cream bars around the house.

jerber160

someone told me I was 'sexy' the other day.. having never been sexy, I stammered a thank you and said, "I don't usually look like this." but if they tell me I look good, I can only smile and say thanks,, cos it's FUN to be this way

MarincicS

I feel exactly the same way and like a few other responses here, i think it's more embarrassment about how i looked before (although i still have a long way to go so to an extent, i am still embarrassed about how i look now). I took so much trouble to dress and walk and move as carefully as i could before so no one would notice i was obese. When they mention my weight loss now, they are saying they noticed all along i was so fat. Damn!! I'd thought i was hiding it so well.

I have a few quite sensitive friends who say "you look great," as opposed to saying "you lost weight." That is so much easier to hear as it is non-specific and they could actually be talking about my new haircut or eyelash extensions . . . right?

Anyway, as yucky as that feeling is, it's MUCH better than being embarrassed AND fat! So soldier through and keep rocking the good health and fitness!!