This website has changed!!

foxyforce

Okay, so here's the way I see it. The whole reason I thought this thread was "turning into a high horse thread" is bc, like I said bf, I didn't want people who need extra support /encouragement/motivation to feel like they wouldn't get it.

I don't think they would be here if they didn't really want to lose the weight. Food is an addiction. No, I can't hold their hand and lead them away from the fridge or pantry-- no one can lead me away from my fridge or pantry. BUT, it's nice to come on and "vent" or talk about feelings of wanting to binge or overeat-- or whatever you want to call it. It's nice to have a place to come and talk about the days that one screws up-- and KNOW that it's NOT THE END OF THE WORLD. Because-- as most of us know, esp in the earlier stages of weight loss, it's so easy to say, "Well, I ate bad today I might as well give up." What's wrong with a bit of encouragement and motivation? Again, weight loss doesn't happen overnight. It's as much of a mental process as it is a physical process.

Yeah, success stories are nice. But, it's good to "talk" about mistakes made too... and get feedback. And, I admit (as I admitted bf) feedback doesn't always have to be sugarcoated. In some cases, we're talking life and death.

And, I'm sure from time to time (after being here for so long) things might start to sound "whiny"-- bc you're so used to it. But, the ones that are "whining" aren't meaning to come off that way, I'm sure.

I hesitate to even post this-- I don't like drawing things out.

way to stay on topic! much appreciated

i concur, wholeheartedly.

BamaRose0107

Banks, I might be wrong, but I think she is saying that she disagrees with you saying that in order to become healthy you have to have all 3 of those things.

OK, well, I guess, but if that's the thought, then I would like to here why she thinks that way. I mean, I don't see how you could become healthy if you don't have the physical tools to become healthy. I.E. if you don't have the physical ability to perform exercise, and/or the means with which to control your eating (say you're encarcerated and can only eat what they give you as an example), then you have very little options upon which to become healthy. Right? I mean, these maybe aren't great examples, but still I can't see where the opinion comes in there.

"here are 3 aspects to becoming healthy 1) Desire to become healthy. 2) Knowledge of how to proceed and understanding your body and mind. 3)The physical capabilities to do so.
If any of these 3 aspects are lacking, you will fail."

Caring about yourself, feeling encouraged and not hated on. Knowledge of how to proceed, is kind of a tricky one...but this is not all there is.

Encouragement from others, i.e. support

Obviously Banks was summarizing the yes, many steps that people go through in their journey to become healthy. All the steps of grieving, for instance. But at the core of his statement, he's right. Encouragement from others is great, but if you don't have the desire to do it FOR YOURSELF, then all the encouragement in the world isn't going to help you.

Caring about yourself = wanting to get healthy.
Feeling encouraged = understanding your mind. If you need the encouragement, seek it out. No one on here is saying, "hey keep all your fears, dissappointments, and worries all bottled up inside and you'll do great!!!" They're simply saying that YES at the end of the day it all boils down to YOU and YOU only. An online forum isn't going to change your life. The people posting there might have a hand in it, but ultimately YOU change YOUR life.

"Hated on"... seriously? Seriously. I know this next statement is going to get me reemed by you and the younger folks on this forum, but how old are you?

Your entire argument sounds like an immature person who hasn't realized yet that she's in control of her own life and no amount of forum posting on what bad decisions she's made is going to change it until she get's her *** in line and does things for herself.

And as for jumping on the back of the Pig Latin joke; it was a little immature as well, but you got all defensive when someone called you out on your post about making bad choices and how it was "our fault" for not posting soon enough to keep you on track. Joke or not that's a warning sign that you're not prepared for this journey.

I could blame my weight on my parents (all umpteenth sets of them) choices about my diet, the way they controled what I ate, the way my life sucked and thats why I'm fat. But ultimately, I'm an adult now and no one runs my life anymore. Even IF they got me here, it's up to me, not them, to get my fat *** out of it.

I'm not saying I'm not guilty of doing EXACTLY what this post is about, whining about how I've made bad choices (though I ask for a verbal slap in the face, no sugar coating) and how I need support. But most of the people on here are right. At the end of the day it IS up to you.

People Lets not bring age into this I have seen women on here twice my age act lke children. This thread started out with opinions. Everyone is entitled to there own, but this has gotten ridiculous. This should be an adult conversation, with no smart *kitten* remarks. We all need to remember that noone has to agree with anyone but we should respect each other.

BrendaLee

Banks, I might be wrong, but I think she is saying that she disagrees with you saying that in order to become healthy you have to have all 3 of those things.

OK, well, I guess, but if that's the thought, then I would like to here why she thinks that way. I mean, I don't see how you could become healthy if you don't have the physical tools to become healthy. I.E. if you don't have the physical ability to perform exercise, and/or the means with which to control your eating (say you're encarcerated and can only eat what they give you as an example), then you have very little options upon which to become healthy. Right? I mean, these maybe aren't great examples, but still I can't see where the opinion comes in there.

"here are 3 aspects to becoming healthy 1) Desire to become healthy. 2) Knowledge of how to proceed and understanding your body and mind. 3)The physical capabilities to do so.
If any of these 3 aspects are lacking, you will fail."

Caring about yourself, feeling encouraged and not hated on. Knowledge of how to proceed, is kind of a tricky one...but this is not all there is.

Encouragement from others, i.e. support

Obviously Banks was summarizing the yes, many steps that people go through in their journey to become healthy. All the steps of grieving, for instance. But at the core of his statement, he's right. Encouragement from others is great, but if you don't have the desire to do it FOR YOURSELF, then all the encouragement in the world isn't going to help you.

Caring about yourself = wanting to get healthy.
Feeling encouraged = understanding your mind. If you need the encouragement, seek it out. No one on here is saying, "hey keep all your fears, dissappointments, and worries all bottled up inside and you'll do great!!!" They're simply saying that YES at the end of the day it all boils down to YOU and YOU only. An online forum isn't going to change your life. The people posting there might have a hand in it, but ultimately YOU change YOUR life.

"Hated on"... seriously? Seriously. I know this next statement is going to get me reemed by you and the younger folks on this forum, but how old are you?

Your entire argument sounds like an immature person who hasn't realized yet that she's in control of her own life and no amount of forum posting on what bad decisions she's made is going to change it until she get's her *** in line and does things for herself.

And as for jumping on the back of the Pig Latin joke; it was a little immature as well, but you got all defensive when someone called you out on your post about making bad choices and how it was "our fault" for not posting soon enough to keep you on track. Joke or not that's a warning sign that you're not prepared for this journey.

I could blame my weight on my parents (all umpteenth sets of them) choices about my diet, the way they controled what I ate, the way my life sucked and thats why I'm fat. But ultimately, I'm an adult now and no one runs my life anymore. Even IF they got me here, it's up to me, not them, to get my fat *** out of it.

I'm not saying I'm not guilty of doing EXACTLY what this post is about, whining about how I've made bad choices (though I ask for a verbal slap in the face, no sugar coating) and how I need support. But most of the people on here are right. At the end of the day it IS up to you.

i just clued into the fact that you were HATING on my age because i used the term hating on! this is exactly what i am talking about. and do not misintrepret info from younger folks just because of their age. why would you even bother? i don't know how old you are, but can you honestly compare your intelligence to anyone younger than you? is it all not valid?

btw, i am 23. and because marla didn't get my racist metaphor, i will also include, i also hate ageism

everyone uses slang, get over it!!! and try to actually read the context of what they are saying or else you will entirely miss the concept!

Loathesome, now in this context, I completely agree with you. I'm 36, and I use the term "hated on". I don't get how that's a valid argument against you, and I don't think it deserved mentioning. Like I said in the other thread though- challenge what someone believes or feels they know, and they will come back at you on whatever terms they can to discredit you.

foxyforce

i know this has gone way off topic, so i will post the link to the ageism thread on here:

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/72321-ageism


but i find, and i am probably just rewording what you said, so my apologies

people will always dislike what you have to say, when you have something to say

this is in opposition to just standing idley by in agreement, which is sometimes necessary too, but as you said, opposition is often challenged with any bull****

mrsyac2

Wow this thread has been railroaded.