I need a girl's advice regarding a man's problem.

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  • Midnight_Sunshine
    Midnight_Sunshine Posts: 369 Member
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    Unless you start dating her, leave it alone. This is not a friend "category" topic. As others have said, it's her own body. She is obviously aware of the issues and doesn't need you to point them out.
    Unless he starts dating her? How is that conversation going to go??

    "Hey baby... I really enjoyed that movie last night. Sooo funny. Hey, speaking of funny things... why do you look like you're melting??"

    Just a guess, but sex is probably not an option that night.

    This is funny! But really why does it make it all right if he is dating her and not if he is just her friend.

    Because he has to sleep with her.
  • Josette89
    Josette89 Posts: 244
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    It's a friendly thing to actually want to be involved in the health of your friends. It is not a problem that you want to ask her these things. Just show that you are concerned and interested. Just bring it up to her that you have noticed her figure and are curious about it. Once you bring it up and understand, you can get passed it and maybe even become a bit closer. It may sting her a little bit, but I'm sure it is better to have someone actually ask about it rather than stare. People are so scared to be open and discuss things with other people, get over it, we are curious creatures, questions shouldn't be seen as a bad thing.
  • Nadyasmom
    Nadyasmom Posts: 281
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    Why would you want to talk to her about it?

    Mind your own business.

    ^^ This.
  • leafstucker16
    leafstucker16 Posts: 136 Member
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    16f4b0d8-d93e-436d-975f-dbfc0d80b4a1.jpg
  • needamulligan
    needamulligan Posts: 558 Member
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    It is a beautiful thing when we all agree :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • needamulligan
    needamulligan Posts: 558 Member
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    Why is it that women want equal rights, but on a topic like this... every day at school I am asked, what are you doing to lose weight... how is your weight loss coming.... And the ones asking are female. I NEVER TOLD THEM, I WAS TRYING TO LOSE WEIGHT!!!

    To the opening poster, I would suggest doing it in a silent method. Asking her to join you on a walk somewhere, play a game of tennis, or something, what would help but don't inform her why. She will be having fun, and you can build on the relationship while you are helping her...

    not this, really, not this
  • GetFitGirl29
    GetFitGirl29 Posts: 14
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    It's a friendly thing to actually want to be involved in the health of your friends. It is not a problem that you want to ask her these things. Just show that you are concerned and interested. Just bring it up to her that you have noticed her figure and are curious about it. Once you bring it up and understand, you can get passed it and maybe even become a bit closer. It may sting her a little bit, but I'm sure it is better to have someone actually ask about it rather than stare. People are so scared to be open and discuss things with other people, get over it, we are curious creatures, questions shouldn't be seen as a bad thing.

    Agree^^ I personally don`t see it as a bad thing to be curious about your friend, and wanting to help her. Who knows, she probably appreciates the help. If a friend could tell me how to get rid of my stretch marks, Im all ears! Don`t let nobody put you down, or feel like your "less" because you asked this question. It Really wasn`t that serious imo!
  • rrumbolt
    rrumbolt Posts: 94 Member
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    unless you have some real good tips for your friend, don't say anything the girl probaby came out of a huge shell, don't put her back there.
  • Amber82479
    Amber82479 Posts: 629 Member
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    Keep it to yourself. I had a friend point out my stretch marks one summer by the pool and ever since then I've avoided wearing a bathing suit like the plague because I'm so self conscious and loathe my body. I'm positive she's well aware of the issue. Unless you're concerned for her health because she's starving herself and not taking care of her body properly, then keep your mouth shut.
  • missindepndnt86
    missindepndnt86 Posts: 77 Member
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    Um, why does it matter to you? Honestly?

    If you say anything to her, you're going to make her more self conscious. If she wants to talk about it, she will.
  • Trechechus
    Trechechus Posts: 2,819 Member
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    Don't
    Say
    Anything
    At
    All.
  • MichelleLaree13
    MichelleLaree13 Posts: 865 Member
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    It is a beautiful thing when we all agree :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

    I DONT AGREE. My friends are brutally honest and my fiancee is also. I couldnt be in a relationship that was not honest. It makes me a little sad that so many people think dishonesty is the way to go. :noway: Maybe that is why so many people fail at relationships...
  • chubbygirl253
    chubbygirl253 Posts: 1,309 Member
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    Women are often self-conscious about their physical imperfections and its 10x worse when a guy notices. So don't bring it up. And its not like she can fix the problem easily. It's not something a trip to the salon can fix. Surgery to remove excess skin is expensive and usually not covered by insurance because it's cosmetic. If you care about her feelings I would pretend u haven't noticed. Even if SHE brings it up, TREAD LIGHTLY, pal. If I found the courage to bring up a sensitive subject and a guy friend was all "uh ya, I noticed. that's nasty" I would be so hurt! I think unless you have a solution you shouldn't be bringing her problems into focus. Help an addict friend get into rehab, help an abused friend get out of a bad relationship. But what are you hoping to accomplish by shedding light on her excess skin? That she will stop wearing bikinis? Trust me, if you mention this topic you won't ever see her in anything less than fully clothed. Probably even wearing a parka. So I hope you aren't feeling romantic toward her, cuz you are guaranteed to never see her naked ever ever if you have this discussion.

    How does she bring up the subject of your imperfections?
  • fluffeesquirrel
    fluffeesquirrel Posts: 63 Member
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    Maybe she didn't lose it fast... maybe she just had a TON of weight to lose. Sometimes no matter how slow you take it off, there's just loose skin. Why exactly do you want to talk to her about it? I don't really understand your intentions.
  • Shrinking_Xtina
    Shrinking_Xtina Posts: 478 Member
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    If she is rocking a bikini then she probably is not concerned with fixing it. Even if she is, unless she personally asks you for help, keep your mouth shut. It may seem like a problem to you but maybe it isn't for her.
  • AmyFett
    AmyFett Posts: 1,607 Member
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    Tbh I would like to be told. I say tell her. And run.

    because you wouldn't notice you have saggy skin? Really? REALLY?
  • _SpeshK_
    _SpeshK_ Posts: 496 Member
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    It is a beautiful thing when we all agree :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

    I DONT AGREE. My friends are brutally honest and my fiancee is also. I couldnt be in a relationship that was not honest. It makes me a little sad that so many people think dishonesty is the way to go. :noway: Maybe that is why so many people fail at relationships...

    Um, it's not being dishonest when she hasn't asked his F-ing opinion. If she was like, "hey do you think my extra skin looks bad" and then said, "no it looks fantastic, i love it!' THEN it would be dishonest. But, for him to just say "Hey, you have a lot of extra skin sagging all over you and it looks terrible" is just unnecessary when she's probably painfully aware of it.

    PLEASE take the time to UNDERSTAND what you're reading before you think you're better than everyone else.
  • TallCurvyMuscles
    TallCurvyMuscles Posts: 50
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    How is this a man's problem?
  • BigBrewski
    BigBrewski Posts: 922 Member
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    Wow.


    A) I'm sure she's aware. I bet she has a mirror

    B) If you don't want a swift kick in the nuts, I'd keep your mouth shut.

    Always got to be on the look out for the swift kick.
  • MichelleLaree13
    MichelleLaree13 Posts: 865 Member
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    It is a beautiful thing when we all agree :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

    I DONT AGREE. My friends are brutally honest and my fiancee is also. I couldnt be in a relationship that was not honest. It makes me a little sad that so many people think dishonesty is the way to go. :noway: Maybe that is why so many people fail at relationships...

    Um, it's not being dishonest when she hasn't asked his F-ing opinion. If she was like, "hey do you think my extra skin looks bad" and then said, "no it looks fantastic, i love it!' THEN it would be dishonest. But, for him to just say "Hey, you have a lot of extra skin sagging all over you and it looks terrible" is just unnecessary when she's probably painfully aware of it.

    PLEASE take the time to UNDERSTAND what you're reading before you think you're better than everyone else.

    There are better ways to phrase things but I will always think it is better to be honest with the people we care about.
    I never said I was better than everyone else. At most I made a statement that "maybe" relationships dont work because people believe not telling how they feel is the best option.

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