MFP Debate....Do you accept friend requests with no msg?

135

Replies

  • move257
    move257 Posts: 313
    I give just about everyone a chance, message or not. But I've found that the non message people don't last long on my list.

    EXACTLY!!!! The people that don't want to take 10 seconds to write a message usually don't say much later on either!! So they don't last. What's the point. Some of you say you don't care, I find that hard to believe. Yes it's a weight loss site above all, but the connections you make on here are important! All that support helps a lot and I like to stay in touch with my friends. Normally the "silent" type stay that way. Sorry, just me.
  • LetsTryThisAgain54
    LetsTryThisAgain54 Posts: 381 Member
    I never understood why a message is important. If you accept without a message and you decide later you shouldn't have, just delete them. 90% of the ones I've accepted did not have a message. No big deal.
  • Jipples
    Jipples Posts: 650 Member
    of course I do. I find it a bit arrogant to tell someone, please let me know in a brief message just why you would like to be friends with me, then I'll judge you based on your comment and decide if I like you. Seriously....
  • SouthernSweetie74
    SouthernSweetie74 Posts: 844
    yes... I pretty much accept any and all requests... I just figure they saw me post somewhere on the boards or something and thought I'd be a great friend... but I can see why some women might feel that way...
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    of course I do. I find it a bit arrogant to tell someone, please let me know in a brief message just why you would like to be friends with me, then I'll judge you based on your comment and decide if I like you. Seriously....

    ^^ This... An essay to be someone's friend pfft.
  • KickassAugust
    KickassAugust Posts: 1,430 Member
    What really sucks is when you get a really nice message with your friend request and then NEVER hear from them again!
  • pixtotts
    pixtotts Posts: 552 Member
    i accept.... but i do like a message :D x
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
    No. I'm happy with my friends now and want to keep my FL small so I can support them. You'd have to write me a pretty convincing message to get in :)
  • move257
    move257 Posts: 313
    What really sucks is when you get a really nice message with your friend request and then NEVER hear from them again!

    This actually is the worst thing! LOL.. Get all excited at first then bam!! HAHA

    *******People can say that it makes you arrogant or whatever but doesn't it make you arrogant as fu%$ for judging other's preferences? To each their own! If you accept a FR without a message, GREAT!! You're entitled! Guess what though? So AM I?!!! Again, to each his/her own!! :D
  • SoViLicious
    SoViLicious Posts: 2,633 Member
    If they have over 100 friends no.
  • Spartan_Maker
    Spartan_Maker Posts: 683 Member
    I prefer a message so that a dialogue can get started, but I accept all friend requests.
  • NareenaTheGypsy
    NareenaTheGypsy Posts: 475 Member
    I'm not collecting friends but I haven't been here very long. I'd say no though. From previous online "places" I learned that sending blank FR's is just weird. I always say why I am sending a FR. It's just common courtesy. 'Hey, I see you're about my size' or 'Oh, another GA person, great!' etc.. ice breakers aren't just for standing around at social mixers anymore ;)
  • SouthernSweetie74
    SouthernSweetie74 Posts: 844
    I don't really care about having friends. I don't really see a point.... sometimes I do sometimes I don't. I don't usually accept them from men who have a ton of pretty girls as their friends, or in other words, a "collector" I don't accept from men in general usually. Sometimes I will leave a reply on a post that is sexual in nature... like anything about sex, or I commented on a post about what is the sexiest thing to wear to bed, etc. and I will receive a few requests from random guys shortly after. Umm no. lol.

    But like I said I don't see a point in having friends on here. It doesn't really serve a purpose IMO.

    I'm not on here to debate whether it serves a purpose for you or not. You may have an introverted personality, and that may just be who you are. However, I will say this: I am very thankful for the friends I have here on MFP. I love being able to interact with others who share the same fitness goals as me or who struggle with some of the same issues as I do. I'm a single mom, and a teacher to boot. I don't get a lot of adult interaction on a daily basis out here in the real world. Don't get me wrong, I do have friends. But they are not all about the eating healthy and getting exercise as I am. Sometimes, they make jokes like, "oh, are you actually going to eat tonight?"

    I have met some amazing people on this site. I have made some great connections with others whom I would have never met otherwise. And, yes, my friends send me messages and post on my wall. Some of them even have my cell number or email addy or even are my friend on FB.

    To me.. it's not about the "woohoos" and the "way to gos".... its about the connections I make. Sure, I have people on my friends list who aren't active in the communication department, but sometimes I find out later on that they are reading my status updates and being uplifted by my wonderful encouraging posts. So... if I can help them out... yay.
  • shorty35565
    shorty35565 Posts: 1,425 Member
    No msg, no add. I'm not into friend collecting. I like to support my friends and get support back. Just a little msg to tell why you wanna b friends isn't askin a lot. I even have it on my profile. If I know who they are from another friend, that's diff. But not knowing at all or speaking anywhere will get a deny w/o msg.
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
    Not anymore, unless it's someone I've had dialogue with...I used to accept everyone, but there comes a point where your FL gets too big to give everyone the attention they deserve, and it's not fair to friends you already value to add every random person that comes along that can't be bothered to say something to you about why they want to be your friend. When you have too many friends, your feed moves by really quickly, and you miss out on things you want to know!

    I got one with no message the other day from a guy with almost nothing in his profile, zero forum posts and 487 female friends on his list. Yeah, no thank you, Buddy.
  • mamagooskie
    mamagooskie Posts: 2,964 Member
    Nope......leave a message or I wont accept.
  • LolasEpicJourney
    LolasEpicJourney Posts: 1,010 Member
    I on occasion will - but for the most part - no message then I deny the request.

    Ive had too many people add me for unknown reasons and end up having a list of people who I cant support and people who dont support me. The whole reason I am here is to builda network of people to support me/support them
  • XtyAnn17
    XtyAnn17 Posts: 632 Member
    Nope
  • kimi131
    kimi131 Posts: 1,058 Member
    I ask for a message. I just think a little note is the cordial thing to do, but I always feel bad declining and therefore accept 80% of friend requests.
  • marketdimlylit
    marketdimlylit Posts: 1,601 Member
    Yeh, usually only from women though, if no interaction i'll end up deleting them.
    From men, nah.
  • dakitten2
    dakitten2 Posts: 888 Member
    I prefer to have a message to know how they connected to me, ie another friend, a post, a blog, etc. But I do accept them regardless. However, I have deleted a couple soon after looking at their profile and see they have an ED and only eat 400 calories a day. I've tried helping other friends with this problem and I'm not equipped to do so professionally. And I hate seeing all their friends go WTG on staying under 400 calories, blah blah blah. I just like to know if it's something I said or did that compelled them to friend request me, not to just be part of a friend gathering who already has 1000 friends or so.
  • MsTanya77
    MsTanya77 Posts: 357 Member
    I don't care if ppl include a message. A message doesn't tell you much. Anyone can lie about why they want to be your friend. How they act on the feed will tell who they really are.
  • Ruthe8
    Ruthe8 Posts: 423 Member
    Debate? I don't accept blank requests. That's not up for debate.
  • bulbadoof
    bulbadoof Posts: 1,058 Member
    Yup. I'm not picky.
  • RikanSoulja
    RikanSoulja Posts: 463 Member
    I like messages but they are not 100% required.
  • Lesley2901
    Lesley2901 Posts: 372 Member
    Yes. I would hope that when someone has sent a friend request then they have looked at my profile or read something I've posted and thought we have something in common. Once they are on my friends list I would expect some interaction though - if it appears I've just been 'collected' then I will delete after a few weeks Quite a few of my current friends did not send a message.and if I hadn't added them i would have missed out on some great support and encouragement from some lovely people.
  • Julz2586
    Julz2586 Posts: 1,330 Member
    not anymore... i've found the 99% of the time someone who has requested without a message has no friends the same or posted on the forum.... just a bit odd to me.

    it's not hard to send a message along with the request.
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    I usually will and delete them if they aren't really what I'm looking for. I prefer to maintain a small number of friends anyway. Around 20 or so.
  • MariaMariaM
    MariaMariaM Posts: 1,322 Member
    No message = Decline most of the the time.
    I usually look at the person profile if there is no msg to see if we have friends in common. If we do, then I accept but if there is no interaction within the week they get deleted.
  • MsQt
    MsQt Posts: 793 Member
    I don't accept request with no message usually but if I happen to check your profile page, like it, and think we'll work great together then I'll accept you.

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