Facebook Status u wish u could post but can't? Post away :)

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  • Reedern
    Reedern Posts: 525 Member
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    What about the "dear idiot who cut me off in traffic...." posts? You do know, they aren't on your FB list, they'll never see it.

    They may never see it, but these posts tend to crack me up when I see them. haha, I have very sarcastic friends and family that make good jokes out of such situations.
  • Hellbent_Heidi
    Hellbent_Heidi Posts: 3,669 Member
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    What about the "dear idiot who cut me off in traffic...." posts? You do know, they aren't on your FB list, they'll never see it.

    They may never see it, but these posts tend to crack me up when I see them. haha, I have very sarcastic friends and family that make good jokes out of such situations.
    I once did a "dear dead mouse in my mousetrap....told you so" post. I didn't expect the MOUSE to read it, but it entertained the people who had to endure the "OMG, I just saw a mouse running through my house and might have to move" post a few days prior....:ohwell:
  • homerjspartan
    homerjspartan Posts: 1,893 Member
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    Dear friend who always gets creepy friend requests from dudes,

    QUIT POSTING CLEAVAGE PICS!!!!


    I know someone like this and I just want to tell her "Your boobs belong IN your shirt!"

    Totally disagree. Boobs are to be shared with all. Only selfish mean women don't show them off. You call them *kitten*, we call them...... that's it..... we call them.
  • xxTAMxx
    xxTAMxx Posts: 614
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    Duck face

    STOP DOING IT.

    IT ISN'T SEXY.

    YOU LOOK STUPID.

    REALLY, REALLY STUPID.
  • knittermom07
    knittermom07 Posts: 94 Member
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    I'm depressed... again...
  • BetterCrazyThanLazy
    BetterCrazyThanLazy Posts: 336
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    Hey old classmates, so you're working your dream job and traveling the world now? thats great.........I'm smaller than you!!!!! lol

    Petty I know, but its all i got :-/

    That's what I would put! Hahahaha!!! Good one! Love it!
  • lilpe5512
    lilpe5512 Posts: 425 Member
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    Who really gives a *kitten* about where you are and what you did yesterday!!
  • Off10h8ed
    Off10h8ed Posts: 282 Member
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    I am seriously happy that you found god. However, I do not need to be preached to on a daily basis, I will save myself and I am perfectly happy with my own spirituality. Thank you very much!
  • Reedern
    Reedern Posts: 525 Member
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    What about the "dear idiot who cut me off in traffic...." posts? You do know, they aren't on your FB list, they'll never see it.

    They may never see it, but these posts tend to crack me up when I see them. haha, I have very sarcastic friends and family that make good jokes out of such situations.
    I once did a "dear dead mouse in my mousetrap....told you so" post. I didn't expect the MOUSE to read it, but it entertained the people who had to endure the "OMG, I just saw a mouse running through my house and might have to move" post a few days prior....:ohwell:

    LMAO... classic! Love it!
  • Lizziethe8th
    Lizziethe8th Posts: 5 Member
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    Person that I knew in high school-Isn't it weird that you like all my statuses and even comment but I just saw you in Wal-Mart, waved and you looked me in the eye and kept walking? Sheeeesh...B%&*H
  • Awkward30
    Awkward30 Posts: 1,927 Member
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    I just want to thank all of my friends who have helped me since my finger has been in a splint... It's been hard to function, so thanks!

    Mostly as a pointed insult to my roommate, who has spent approximately 45 min home in the week I've been unable to move my finger and has asked for gruesome pictures, but offered no help. She's completely ditched me since her relationship started and I'm incredibly resentful. We used to hang out at least 4 days a week.... then she didn't need me anymore.

    Whatever, at least she's putting weight on, while I'm taking it off :)
  • XxXWhitneyShereeXxX
    XxXWhitneyShereeXxX Posts: 160 Member
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    Stop talking about your Perfect husband/boyfriend and perfect kids No one cares nor do we belive you TELL THE TRUTH here ill start
    I love my husband but 6 times out of 10 id rather punch him in the face than kiss him (I really love him tho lol)
    I love my children and they are cute .... until your around them 24 hours of every day .... then they start to get on your dam nerves. No ones perfect, no one thinks your perfect and we all know half the **** that comes out of your mouth is bull****. And ladies have some respect cover yourself up not all of us want to see everything you have >.<
  • Pema91
    Pema91 Posts: 44
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    I see a lot of the rants are about stupid *kitten* other people post on fb. I delete on the spot if I see a stupid status update. ESPECIALLY if they try to preach their religion, post graphic photos of cancer victims/african children/abused animals or get overly patriotic about the military/war.
    Unfortunately I have had to delete a few more friends than I would have liked due to racism also... Really disappointed.
  • KxCoyote
    KxCoyote Posts: 122 Member
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    1. I don't need to see everything you eat.
    2. I, and nobody else, wants to see your childs 'adorable' snot bubbles. every kid blows snot. nobody needs to post it.
  • LowFatMama
    LowFatMama Posts: 625 Member
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    YA its totally cool that there are hundreds of pics of you getting wasted or out partying, and like 5 pictures of your kids.... And the mom of the year award goes to::: :noway: good grief grow up already!
  • jpe71
    jpe71 Posts: 50 Member
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    Can't just now, since my husband will see it, and it will upset him while he can't do a thing about it...

    Neighbor who has been working on our fence just came over. Seems while we were out of town (leaving the place in care of our almost-adult daughter), someone came into our yard, took his circular saw (which he left here because he'd been working here, made two ladders out of scrap lumber, and stole tools and stuff from his yard. In broad daylight. So we've got a thief on our hands with a full clip of chutzpah, and who has already visited our backyard once. I think it's time to once more experiment with giving the dogs the run of the place at night. I do not want to be surprised by visitors to my house.
  • tessiscruisen
    tessiscruisen Posts: 84 Member
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    Ok.. Here Goes.

    Dear Facebook Friend,
    I truely understand that you are morning the loss of your child killed by a drunk driver. Posting their pictures with different background images and poems several times a day is really too much. I don't want to delete you because I understand your pain... but can we keep the memorializing to a minimum, it's been a few years.

    Dear Daughter
    Yes I'm happy to watch your sweet child for you while you are working.... But now that you have posted where you are and who you're with on facebook - no not working, guess you will need to find another sitter when you really have to work. SMH I thought I raised you better.

    Dear Facebook Friends:
    Yes, I know there is a storm coming and its raining outside - don't need facebook to tell me that, we live down the street from each other, but hey, thanks for the update.. LOL.
  • dare2love81
    dare2love81 Posts: 928 Member
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    "FML" is not an appropriate way top sum up "I had a bad day".

    THIS!!!
  • hikeout470
    hikeout470 Posts: 628 Member
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    Just passed an overwhelming desire to post a link to this on my FB

    That would be like crossing the streams in Ghostbusters. You don't cross the streams.

    LOVE this!
  • Ashlee2421
    Ashlee2421 Posts: 58 Member
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    1) Please post more pictures of your new purchases and tattoos. I will gladly throw them in your face Friday when you tell me you can't afford child support, the same conversation we have EVERY Friday.

    2) Every post you make on FB doesn't need to be about how much you love Lisa because a week ago it was how Lisa is nothing but a *kitten* and a lying *****. No one cares about your stupid teenage relationship and we all think you're stupid.

    3) You're a grandmother. Stop being a passive aggressive beeyotch to me and your own son and daughter in law via FB. Grow UP. Personal dramas do NOT need to be blasted online. Kinda like when you and your little friend ganged up on me when I was pregnant and posted on FB about how your son isn't the father of my child. REALLY??!?! But I'm not going to worry about it, because I've saved every FB post and nasty text from you and your family in case your son ever gets his panties in a bunch and tries to take me to court. Which he WONT because he knows deep down that he can't handle joint custody and he'd only be doing it out of spite.

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