Need kid to move on!! Advice please.

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Replies

  • falcon367
    falcon367 Posts: 116
    Me personally? I would change the locks .... then never mention about giving him a spare.
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    *deleted -- accidentally posted twice.
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    Let your husband handle it. Scary how you keep saying "he's not my son, he's my step son." You sound like a real treat. :ohwell:
    If you read the threads, it seems a pretty clear response to the plethora of "it's your fault if you raised him that way" responses, when she made it clear from the start that she didn't raise him. Scary how people keep jumping all over her for wanting a grown man to act like one.
  • Nix143
    Nix143 Posts: 522 Member
    Hey I haven't read all 9 pages, sorry, so apologies if this has been raised before.

    What does your husband think of the situation? I know step kids are tricky at the best of times and if you two aren't singing off the same song sheet then you could open up a whole parcel of trouble for yourself.

    I'd talk to your husband and then get him to deal with it - once you've both agreed what you're happy with. I just think it's important your husband is on the same page for you to be able to enforce anything like this.

    Good luck, I hope you come to a solution that pleases everyone :)
  • d8nni
    d8nni Posts: 49 Member
    Tell him you want to have sex with your husband in every room in the house and you are concerned he might walk in on you. You won't have to ask for the key. He will give it to you.

    I moved home when I was 20, and right back out again when my step-dad said I was interfering with their sex life. Seriously, I was on the street in under a week. IT WORKS!
  • dmpizza
    dmpizza Posts: 3,321 Member
    I hate to be political, but I love this quote "Your 20's aren't a time to be sitting in your childhood bedroom staring at a faded Obama poster".
  • Schmelvie
    Schmelvie Posts: 233 Member
    Send him a link to this thread. If it doesn't wake him up, then it's definitely time to take the key back or change the locks.
  • ahmommy
    ahmommy Posts: 316 Member
    I'm honestly baffled by the number of people my age calling their parents' house "home" in this thread.

    I graduated from college when I was 22 and I didn't get a job right away. I moved back home because I couldn't afford to live on my own. It took me 6 months to finally find a job, and then with my parents' approval I continued to live at home and save money. After another 6 months, I was ready to move out and get my own apartment - but then I got engaged and decided to wait until we were married. So I ended up living at home for a year and a half. I didn't pay rent, but I did pay to have all of the upstairs carpet replaced.

    The moment I got married and moved out, my parents' house was no longer my home. My home is where I live with my husband and my children. I'm 30 years old. The house that I grew up in will always be dear to me, but it's not my home anymore. It's my parents' home. I have a key, but I never show up unannounced. When I do come over I generally don't knock, but they are almost always in the kitchen (near the door), so I'm not just up and walking through their house alone, either.

    I also have a key to my in-laws house and we would never show up there uninvited, either.

    To the OP - I wouldn't go the passive aggressive route and just change the locks. Sit down with him and your husband and explain how you feel.
  • kr1stadee
    kr1stadee Posts: 1,774 Member
    I'm 27 and drop in on my parents all the time. They love it.

    I feel bad for your son.

    Tell him to clean up after himself if you are sick of it. He's a product of his upbringing, remember...

    If you don't want him around unless invited, why are you worried about hurt feelings?

    Yeah - doubt they "love" it. If you're 27, use your manners and call ahead. Your parents have a life and need their privacy and space too! I'm sure your parents are much like the OP and sensitive of your feelings which is why they haven't given the same message to YOU! :)

    Thanks for assuming you understand the dynamics of my family!
    My parents are insulted if I call first. Have said multiple times to my brother as well, "I love when you guys just show up, it brightens my day"

    My other family members (aunts, uncles, cousins) will actually get after you if you knock before entering the house.

    It's a cultural thing, not a manners thing.

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