Calories in Lip Gloss/Chap Stick???

chosengiver

You have been applying it to the wrong set of lips.

:laugh: hahahahaha :laugh:

AllTehBeers

I'm giggling because there are fat b!tches all across the world throwing out lipstick RIGHT NOW.

If this wasn't so f'n funny, I might find it offensive.

nickiog

NikkiSixGuns

Wow. Lots of reporting going on in here. Feels like I'm at work! I'm gonna have to start a spreadsheet.

almc170

Forget the calories...is it Paleo-approved????

lamoursuffit

I think your biggest danger would be from the Burt's Bees chapstick. It's made form beeswax which will still have traces of honey in it. Honey being sugar will cause an insulin spike and cause your body to hold onto its fat. Even though the quantity is low it is being introduced into your system transdermally so it's an instant shot of sugar to your bloodstream rather than a slower absorption through your digestive tract.

This is just so...I don't even...

The possible minute traces of honey will not cause an "insulin spike" (by which I assume you mean blood sugar spike) OR cause you to "hold on to fat." In an average, nondiabetic person, the amount of sugar associated in a dangerous blood sugar spike is so ridiculously high, you would have to really, REALLY try to do so from some chapstick.

Perhaps I have missed any sarcasm in your post. I truly hope so. If I did, I apologize. :flowerforyou:

sjohnny

*walks into thread, starts laughing uncontrollably, then runs out of thread to the bathroom* Geez... there should be a warning label on this thread!! LOL Thanks for the laughs!!!

I fail to see the humor in someone asking for help in any aspect of her weight loss.

Consider yourself reported.

I've reported you for reporting her. Enjoy your ban.

Negative on the ban. I talked to the mods and got two of my strikes commuted to fouls and one was outside the strike zone so it was a ball.

nickiog

You should really look into moisturizing lotion. I mean, if it's putting moisture into my skin, isn't that just causing me to gain water weight and thusly GAIN WEIGHT? LOTION IS MAKING ME FATTer!!!!!!!!!!!

not to mention those shampoos that " add body " ...that body its adding is in the form of fat....its really all just a conspiracy.

sjohnny

I think your biggest danger would be from the Burt's Bees chapstick. It's made form beeswax which will still have traces of honey in it. Honey being sugar will cause an insulin spike and cause your body to hold onto its fat. Even though the quantity is low it is being introduced into your system transdermally so it's an instant shot of sugar to your bloodstream rather than a slower absorption through your digestive tract.

This is just so...I don't even...

The possible minute traces of honey will not cause an "insulin spike" (by which I assume you mean blood sugar spike) OR cause you to "hold on to fat." In an average, nondiabetic person, the amount of sugar associated in a dangerous blood sugar spike is so ridiculously high, you would have to really, REALLY try to do so from some chapstick.

Perhaps I have missed any sarcasm in your post. I truly hope so. If I did, I apologize. :flowerforyou:

I don't know where you're getting your information but you couldn't be more wrong. That all might be true from oral ingestion of sugars but in this case we are dealing with transdermal ingestion. Do the research. FACT: Transdermal ingestion is a direct tap into the blood stream. FACT: When sugar is transmitted directly to the blood stream it hits all at once rather than being eased in through the digestive tract. This exponentially increases the effect of the sugar on the endocrine system creating an insulin spike resulting in fat storage. The only faster method would be direct application through a mucous membrane - this making application to the "other lips" even worse.

ElizaRoche

lamoursuffit

This should have been posted in Chit Chat just for the pure hilarity. Great post :flowerforyou:

sjohnny

This should have been posted in Chit Chat just for the pure hilarity. Great post :flowerforyou:

RUDE!

Reported

thathockeychick23

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say chapstick has no calories in it.

Nerdybreisawesome

You are joking, right? You really care about calories that you may consume over your lifetime in chapstick? This IS a joke. It has to be.

PortiaZabrina

this thread stumped me ... but only for a shere moment.
Sounds like something an anorexic would say(I'm not calling you one, but i do dig your heels)... Don't worry about lipgloss. Tic tacs and gum have like 2-6calls per piece.

love_

Lol!! I had NO freakin idea! Craaazy.

lamoursuffit

I think your biggest danger would be from the Burt's Bees chapstick. It's made form beeswax which will still have traces of honey in it. Honey being sugar will cause an insulin spike and cause your body to hold onto its fat. Even though the quantity is low it is being introduced into your system transdermally so it's an instant shot of sugar to your bloodstream rather than a slower absorption through your digestive tract.

This is just so...I don't even...

The possible minute traces of honey will not cause an "insulin spike" (by which I assume you mean blood sugar spike) OR cause you to "hold on to fat." In an average, nondiabetic person, the amount of sugar associated in a dangerous blood sugar spike is so ridiculously high, you would have to really, REALLY try to do so from some chapstick.

Perhaps I have missed any sarcasm in your post. I truly hope so. If I did, I apologize. :flowerforyou:

I don't know where you're getting your information but you couldn't be more wrong. That all might be true from oral ingestion of sugars but in this case we are dealing with transdermal ingestion. Do the research. FACT: Transdermal ingestion is a direct tap into the blood stream. FACT: When sugar is transmitted directly to the blood stream it hits all at once rather than being eased in through the digestive tract. This exponentially increases the effect of the sugar on the endocrine system creating an insulin spike resulting in fat storage. The only faster method would be direct application through a mucous membrane - this making application to the "other lips" even worse.

Right, it does get there must faster, you are correct, and as such would be stronger. I never denied any of that. What, exactly, did I say that was wrong? A blood sugar spike will in turn cause an insulin spike, which DOES hold on to fat, but in no way will the miniscule amount of glucose in chapstick cause a blood sugar spike. Unless of course I'm forgetting about all the cases of DKA and diabetic coma caused by someone just using too much Burt's Bees...oh wait. :flowerforyou:

charlybu

Don't forget the lead! Omg! http://www.snopes.com/science/stats/lipstick.asp

lamoursuffit

This should have been posted in Chit Chat just for the pure hilarity. Great post :flowerforyou:

RUDE!

Reported

Go for it :flowerforyou:

lrtoland

When I open my mouth to speak some particles in the air get in my mouth. How do I log that? Does anyone know how many calories are in an average gulp of air?

^^This made me laugh out loud!!! You, my dear lady, are amazing!!!

NikkiSixGuns

This should have been posted in Chit Chat just for the pure hilarity. Great post :flowerforyou:

RUDE!

Reported

You people are so mean. I don't wanna play any more.

MoreBean13

This should have been posted in Chit Chat just for the pure hilarity. Great post :flowerforyou:

RUDE!

Reported

You people are so mean. I don't wanna play any more.

Don't go! This is a place of mutual respect and understanding.

ETA: except for the guy that told me to set myself on fire. That really was rude.

slkehl

This would have been funnier if you weren't trolling. But replies are good nonetheless

MoreBean13

This would have been funnier if you weren't trolling. But replies are good nonetheless

Harsh accusation!

sjohnny

This would have been funnier if you weren't trolling. But replies are good nonetheless

Slander. Slander AND libel.

Reported.

sjohnny

I think your biggest danger would be from the Burt's Bees chapstick. It's made form beeswax which will still have traces of honey in it. Honey being sugar will cause an insulin spike and cause your body to hold onto its fat. Even though the quantity is low it is being introduced into your system transdermally so it's an instant shot of sugar to your bloodstream rather than a slower absorption through your digestive tract.

This is just so...I don't even...

The possible minute traces of honey will not cause an "insulin spike" (by which I assume you mean blood sugar spike) OR cause you to "hold on to fat." In an average, nondiabetic person, the amount of sugar associated in a dangerous blood sugar spike is so ridiculously high, you would have to really, REALLY try to do so from some chapstick.

Perhaps I have missed any sarcasm in your post. I truly hope so. If I did, I apologize. :flowerforyou:

I don't know where you're getting your information but you couldn't be more wrong. That all might be true from oral ingestion of sugars but in this case we are dealing with transdermal ingestion. Do the research. FACT: Transdermal ingestion is a direct tap into the blood stream. FACT: When sugar is transmitted directly to the blood stream it hits all at once rather than being eased in through the digestive tract. This exponentially increases the effect of the sugar on the endocrine system creating an insulin spike resulting in fat storage. The only faster method would be direct application through a mucous membrane - this making application to the "other lips" even worse.

Right, it does get there must faster, you are correct, and as such would be stronger. I never denied any of that. What, exactly, did I say that was wrong? A blood sugar spike will in turn cause an insulin spike, which DOES hold on to fat, but in no way will the miniscule amount of glucose in chapstick cause a blood sugar spike. Unless of course I'm forgetting about all the cases of DKA and diabetic coma caused by someone just using too much Burt's Bees...oh wait. :flowerforyou:

You're totally missing the obvious differences. Did you not see that I stated that these were FACTs? Please do the research before you come here and embarrass yourself.

MoreBean13

I think your biggest danger would be from the Burt's Bees chapstick. It's made form beeswax which will still have traces of honey in it. Honey being sugar will cause an insulin spike and cause your body to hold onto its fat. Even though the quantity is low it is being introduced into your system transdermally so it's an instant shot of sugar to your bloodstream rather than a slower absorption through your digestive tract.

This is just so...I don't even...

The possible minute traces of honey will not cause an "insulin spike" (by which I assume you mean blood sugar spike) OR cause you to "hold on to fat." In an average, nondiabetic person, the amount of sugar associated in a dangerous blood sugar spike is so ridiculously high, you would have to really, REALLY try to do so from some chapstick.

Perhaps I have missed any sarcasm in your post. I truly hope so. If I did, I apologize. :flowerforyou:

I don't know where you're getting your information but you couldn't be more wrong. That all might be true from oral ingestion of sugars but in this case we are dealing with transdermal ingestion. Do the research. FACT: Transdermal ingestion is a direct tap into the blood stream. FACT: When sugar is transmitted directly to the blood stream it hits all at once rather than being eased in through the digestive tract. This exponentially increases the effect of the sugar on the endocrine system creating an insulin spike resulting in fat storage. The only faster method would be direct application through a mucous membrane - this making application to the "other lips" even worse.

Right, it does get there must faster, you are correct, and as such would be stronger. I never denied any of that. What, exactly, did I say that was wrong? A blood sugar spike will in turn cause an insulin spike, which DOES hold on to fat, but in no way will the miniscule amount of glucose in chapstick cause a blood sugar spike. Unless of course I'm forgetting about all the cases of DKA and diabetic coma caused by someone just using too much Burt's Bees...oh wait. :flowerforyou:

You're totally missing the obvious differences. Did you not see that I stated that these were FACTs? Please do the research before you come here and embarrass yourself.

It's Science, yo.

guardian419

I think the only person embarrassing themselves are the self-righteous individuals who feel the need to report anything they don't like, even if it isn't against the guidelines. Yes, MINE was out of line, and I'll take that warning, it's worth the laugh. I'll gladly mock stupidity. If it forces that (hopefully momentary) lack of deep thought to be corrected, great! If not... I still get a good laugh

It must be a sad, lonely life (NOT directed at the OP, you started a great thread intentional or otherwise...)

NikkiSixGuns

This should have been posted in Chit Chat just for the pure hilarity. Great post :flowerforyou:

RUDE!

Reported

You people are so mean. I don't wanna play any more.

Don't go! This is a place of mutual respect and understanding.

ETA: except for the guy that told me to set myself on fire. That really was rude.

Yes, true. I have felt the respect and understanding. It gives me a warm, fuzzy feeling. Then again, maybe that's just air molecules stuck to my cinnamon & sugar chapstick...

And yes, there have been some cranky replies. I suspect they aren't getting enough chapstick in their diets!

NikkiSixGuns

When I open my mouth to speak some particles in the air get in my mouth. How do I log that? Does anyone know how many calories are in an average gulp of air?

I heard that if you wear really sticky glossy lipstick it catches some of the air particles on their way in. Kinda like flypaper. That way you can't swallow and digest the air particles. Reduced-calorie air! Yay!

Speaking of the flypaper effect, maybe sticky lip gloss will help with the bugs-in-the-teeth problem so many of you runners and cyclists are talking about...

Wait! After thinking about this further, I have decided that "diet" air is not the solution. You said "gulp of air". There's the problem! PORTION CONTROL!