Why dont girls come up to guys

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  • StyxxandStones
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    I've approached guys on several occasions. Results varied. More often than not, we got together and dated after I approached them. When a guy approaches me, it usually feels like he just wants to get into my pants, so I don't follow through.
  • Rizabees
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    Well I know the reason they don't come up to me (fat). Women are generally pretty shallow.

    ya, we're so shallow. we're so shallow and self absorbed that we only approach men who generally seem to respect women and arent so lacking in self confidence. thats the other thing about us shallow women.

    And you can tell how much respect a guy has for you by judging his fitness level? LOL I doubt it. There is no way any woman responding how they've approached guys before went off anything other than pure looks.

    I was in the same classes as my husband before I asked him out so I got to see his personality and that we had a lot in common. + He's smart and I like smart guys.

    Sorry you're not having any luck with the ladies, but no need to call all of us shallow.
  • bellygoaway
    bellygoaway Posts: 441 Member
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    I used to ask this all the time. Then I had two revelations... I looked in the mirror and also realized I never go anywhere where one would come up to me.
  • diodelcibo
    diodelcibo Posts: 2,564 Member
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    I think many men are too intimidated by a pretty girl to approach her, so they never meet! I see nothing wrong with being a confident woman and making the first move. I've done it several times and never regretted it.

    I dont think it is the intimidation factor but more of the she is too good looking to be available factor.

    REALLY? Men assume good looking women are always taken?

    No only the single men....apparently the married men can sniff out a single girl very easily....

    true story.

    the same can be said for married women for guys as well...
  • Danny_Boy13
    Danny_Boy13 Posts: 2,094 Member
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    Ok I have a question for the guys....usually when I'm out, I'm with a mixed group of friends (male & female) OR a mostly male group. Hanging with the guys probably hinders my approachability right??

    You'd be better off with a 3rd eye or the Black Plague. Girls in groups are a no-go!

    ^^^ LMAO!!! Usually this... not always but more times then not. The only exception to this rule is if the girls are in a group of just girls and they appear to be scooping out the scene. But sausage in a group of taco....yeah, chicks in that situation are usually passed up.
  • _JR_
    _JR_ Posts: 830 Member
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    Ok I have a question for the guys....usually when I'm out, I'm with a mixed group of friends (male & female) OR a mostly male group. Hanging with the guys probably hinders my approachability right??

    You'd be better off with a 3rd eye or the Black Plague. Girls in groups are a no-go!

    No, quite often I'll be the lone female in a group of men.....

    But you're still in a group. No lone wolf wants to wander into a that situation. I would immediately think one guy is the boyfriend, husband, brother, and they're going to form a shield around her. Guys tend to get possessive over the girls in their lives.
  • BeingAwesome247
    BeingAwesome247 Posts: 1,171 Member
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    Ok I have a question for the guys....usually when I'm out, I'm with a mixed group of friends (male & female) OR a mostly male group. Hanging with the guys probably hinders my approachability right??

    You'd be better off with a 3rd eye or the Black Plague. Girls in groups are a no-go!

    ^^^ LMAO!!! Usually this... not always but more times then not. The only exception to this rule is if the girls are in a group of just girls and they appear to be scooping out the scene. But sausage in a group of taco....yeah, chicks in that situation are usually passed up.

    hahaha I better work on approaching the men then!
    I had a falling out with some female friends due to them loving drama - everytime we went out - and me not loving it.
    I wish I had more girl friends so it's not that I don't like having women to hang out with, just have more male friends.
    When I go out, I'm usually with the boys
  • Feisty_Red
    Feisty_Red Posts: 982 Member
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    Ok I have a question for the guys....usually when I'm out, I'm with a mixed group of friends (male & female) OR a mostly male group. Hanging with the guys probably hinders my approachability right??

    You'd be better off with a 3rd eye or the Black Plague. Girls in groups are a no-go!

    ^^^ LMAO!!! Usually this... not always but more times then not. The only exception to this rule is if the girls are in a group of just girls and they appear to be scooping out the scene. But sausage in a group of taco....yeah, chicks in that situation are usually passed up.

    If I am alone...in a bar...in my bra and undies...holding my 3rd blue drink of the night..that will work? ya? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I wanna make sure its obvious enough..
  • Danny_Boy13
    Danny_Boy13 Posts: 2,094 Member
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    Ok I have a question for the guys....usually when I'm out, I'm with a mixed group of friends (male & female) OR a mostly male group. Hanging with the guys probably hinders my approachability right??

    You'd be better off with a 3rd eye or the Black Plague. Girls in groups are a no-go!

    ^^^ LMAO!!! Usually this... not always but more times then not. The only exception to this rule is if the girls are in a group of just girls and they appear to be scooping out the scene. But sausage in a group of taco....yeah, chicks in that situation are usually passed up.

    If I am alone...in a bar...in my bra and undies...holding my 3rd blue drink of the night..that will work? ya? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I wanna make sure its obvious enough..

    LMFAO!!! RED....I think I love you for this comment alone. LOL!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Louisianababy93
    Louisianababy93 Posts: 1,709 Member
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    I talk to EVERYONE!!
    even if they dont wanna talk to me,but,im the kinda person everyone likes to talk to.
    & im not scared to approch those topics people usually tend to wanna avoid..lol

    but, im a people person,that might have something to do with it.
  • _JR_
    _JR_ Posts: 830 Member
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    I think I'm seeing a little difference in definition of "approach someone" from some of the ladies here.

    When a man (and the OP) says "approach", it means she approaches a guy with the intent of getting to know better or ask out on a date.

    I think some women think "approach" just means casual conversation. While that certainly can lead to something, it doesn't necessarily mean the same thing. I "talk" to lots of women in my day, but none of them do I have any intent of taking it further than that short exchange of dialogue. That's just being "friendly", and I don't think it qualifies as "approaching" someone by a guy's definition.
  • Feisty_Red
    Feisty_Red Posts: 982 Member
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    I think I'm seeing a little difference in definition of "approach someone" from some of the ladies here.

    When a man (and the OP) says "approach", it means she approaches a guy with the intent of getting to know better or ask out on a date.

    I think some women think "approach" just means casual conversation. While that certainly can lead to something, it doesn't necessarily mean the same thing. I "talk" to lots of women in my day, but none of them do I have any intent of taking it further than that short exchange of dialogue. That's just being "friendly", and I don't think it qualifies as "approaching" someone by a guy's definition.

    If any single lady is in this man's area...approach this man and ask him out..... !!!!!!! He's top notch :bigsmile:
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
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    I think many men are too intimidated by a pretty girl to approach her, so they never meet! I see nothing wrong with being a confident woman and making the first move. I've done it several times and never regretted it.

    I dont think it is the intimidation factor but more of the she is too good looking to be available factor.

    REALLY? Men assume good looking women are always taken?

    No only the single men....apparently the married men can sniff out a single girl very easily....

    true story.

    the same can be said for married women for guys as well...

    I would not be surprised...but I wouldn't know about that....not having ever been a married woman, or a guy ......

    :smile:
  • BeingAwesome247
    BeingAwesome247 Posts: 1,171 Member
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    Ok I have a question for the guys....usually when I'm out, I'm with a mixed group of friends (male & female) OR a mostly male group. Hanging with the guys probably hinders my approachability right??

    You'd be better off with a 3rd eye or the Black Plague. Girls in groups are a no-go!

    ^^^ LMAO!!! Usually this... not always but more times then not. The only exception to this rule is if the girls are in a group of just girls and they appear to be scooping out the scene. But sausage in a group of taco....yeah, chicks in that situation are usually passed up.

    If I am alone...in a bar...in my bra and undies...holding my 3rd blue drink of the night..that will work? ya? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I wanna make sure its obvious enough..

    LMFAO!!! RED....I think I love you for this comment alone. LOL!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    oh lordy!! That's what I've been doing wrong!! I keep my clothes on....damnit
  • laceface626
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    I don't know why more girls don't approach guys...they should! Many girls want to sit and wait for a guy to approach them...but why not just take initiative? It's possible that a lot of girls have the mentality of wanting to be swept off their feet, and that does not include any effort on their part. But personally, I think that's just a little unrealistic. Besides, why wait for what you want to happen when you could make it happen yourself? :)
  • Danny_Boy13
    Danny_Boy13 Posts: 2,094 Member
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    Ok I have a question for the guys....usually when I'm out, I'm with a mixed group of friends (male & female) OR a mostly male group. Hanging with the guys probably hinders my approachability right??

    You'd be better off with a 3rd eye or the Black Plague. Girls in groups are a no-go!

    ^^^ LMAO!!! Usually this... not always but more times then not. The only exception to this rule is if the girls are in a group of just girls and they appear to be scooping out the scene. But sausage in a group of taco....yeah, chicks in that situation are usually passed up.

    If I am alone...in a bar...in my bra and undies...holding my 3rd blue drink of the night..that will work? ya? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I wanna make sure its obvious enough..

    LMFAO!!! RED....I think I love you for this comment alone. LOL!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    oh lordy!! That's what I've been doing wrong!! I keep my clothes on....damnit

    NAKEDNESS FTW!!! WOOHOO!!! \0/
  • Cespuglio
    Cespuglio Posts: 385 Member
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    I've both been approached and done the approaching since I was a teenager. Usually I approach when the crush is just too big to hold back, since I do tend to be shy a lot of the time. Mostly, I've been fortunate and some of my best relationships have resulted from my boldness. Other times I've bombed royally. I mean, epically. I also enjoy being chased and have had great relationships there too. I wouldn't be too quick to say the challenge is gone when the girl does the approaching though. For me at least, it ends up being more of a challenge for the guy if I approach him because I tend to be even more careful than usual about sending the wrong impression. If he approaches me, I tend to feel a little more generous with my attention because I want him to know I like him too.
  • SnakeDarling
    SnakeDarling Posts: 352 Member
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    Usually a lack of self confidence and pretty much only being attracted to guys that are so out of my league it's unreal lol

    But that's why I'm here I guess
  • WeekndOVOXO
    WeekndOVOXO Posts: 779 Member
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    Girls do approach guys as long as they are not ugly or creepy.

    This x 1000 this.
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
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    I don't approach, I don't have the courage.. I will get approached occasionally, but its often by the really drunk ones who have managed to drink their way through their issues with my height. lol